Saturday, September 2, 2017

Clueless Review


note; I'm not a bimbo, but I spell like one
clueless
this is my review on clueless(90s ver)
its based on the 1815 book by jane Austin called emma (not the degrassi chick)and stars Alicia Silverstone from batman and robin(the gay one)
my gf likes this movie cuz of the fun 90s bimbos
it starts with the Digimon the movie song "kids in America"
aliecia narrates how shes a normal teen and chooses a outfit on her 90s comp
her dads a lawyer and his ex wifes kid is coming for dinner
also she drives a car badly
she picks up her bimbo friend and they go to high school
the bimbo friends bf is a homie and thinks hes cheeting on her
later aliecia gives a bimboy speech in debate club about letting in foreigners
in the irak the u s americans in the Africa like totally
also the teacher is the guy from princess bride who bit it with the poison
1 guy attempts to jump out the window at his report card
he earlier said the way his kids will feel about Nine Ince Nails is how he feels about the rolling stones
aliecia gets a C in debating
she gets home and the step bro is there and they clash over tv
dad wants to know her grades but she sez they aint ready as she wants to change em
she reveals she got her other teachers to do it with lies but princess bride guy wont
she wants to fix him up with a chick to change him
but none of the teachers are hot
holy cr-p the step bro was ant man and the teen in Halloween 06
and the dad was in Myra Breckinridge, the hunger and buckaroo banzai
they leave a love note for the least awful one
the nine inch nails guy gets the most lates and is proud of it
his actor was in Garfield the craft and roadtrip
she drops hints in class about the teacher liking him
at home dad finds she has 2 tickets and no licsence and sez she needs a read driver with her when in the jeep
she gets the step bro to drive with her and he wants to get marky mark walhburg to plant trees
hes an eco fruit
he sez shes selfish and it affects her
later she gives the teacher coffee and sez to share it with the teacher she wants to date him
holy cr-p we're like 20 mins in with adds
but it went so fast I thought it was like 40
then we getta montage of the teachers being happier together and trickling down to the students
her report card sez she got an a-
her dads glad she argues her grades up
in gym class aliecia wants to help people and a grungy looking chick comes in and she wants to help her
aliewcia shows her around and gives advice
also aliecia don't date high schoolers
later the grungy chick meets the nine inch nails guy and they bond
oh and hes a stoner
aliecvia advises against it and gives her a makeover
no one sez "makeover" anymore
aliecvia trains her to be a bimbo
step bro  whines about it
ah yeah
theres a mentos add in here
love those things
they try to get the grungy girl to go with a cool guy and take snapshots with a film camera of them hangimg out
holy cr-p the cool guy is Jeremy sisto from law and order and wrong turn 01
later akecia invites grungy girl to her dads place for dinner
cool guy is getting into grungy gurl
they all go to a party but nine inch nails guy is there
he spills beer on alievias shoes and pays em back with chronic
later cook guy kisses aliecia during a game and bimbo friends bf shaves his head
if he gets swastika tattoos he could be a Buddhist monk
hes black btw
nine inch nails guy keeps winning over grungy girl
then gurngy gets hit in the head with a throw shoe and cool guy helps her
aliecia thinks shes doing good but her dad calls and wants her home in 20 mins
cool guy volunteers to take share home but he tries to seduce her
but she don't consent and he reveals he has no interest in grungy girl
she gets out and he leaves
then some guy sticks her up and takes her phone
she cant call home or the party so she calls her step bro to pick her up
step bros gf is a wishy washy touchy feely dink and slicia corrects her on shakespear(as hamlet was played by mel gfibson)
man, this bimbo is like my gf
an expert in some things
later grungy, bimbo and alecia talk about guys and aliecia is a virgin
good way to avoid aids
ask magic Johnson, freddy mercury and Charlie sheen
later she bashes 90s fashion of baggy pants, backwards base ball cap and greasy hair
later this dreamy guy joins the class and she is gay for him
she gives an oral thing on violence in shows in a super 90s bimbo way
like with the u s americans in the like America in the irak of the Africans
she tries to seduce him by wearing less and being kinda 5kanky
theres a party and when dreamy comes to get acielia and he intimidates dreamy
hes kind of a 50s guy
dad makes her wear a jacket over her minidress and has step bro follow them
oh and dads working on lawyer things
at the party grungy comes by and falls on her a55
aliecia is having fun but feels bad for grungy not having a dance partner
but stepbro dances with her
years I meen weeks I mean hours later everyones gone and dreamy is still dancing
so step bro takes em home
they bring food for the lawyers and themxselves
step bro sez his new dad is on his a55 about everything and hes staying with them
also they watch ren and stimpy
days later dreamy wants to come over to watch vhs tapes and she spends hours getting ready
also she uses poloroids instead of mirrors to check outfits'
he comes by and they watch Spartacus or w/e
she comes onto him but he don't notice and books it
she tells her bimbo friend and her bf about her trying to b0ne him but bf sez hes queer
also bf gives bimbo driving lessons but she winds up on the freeway and freaks out
they celebrate surviving by b0ning
at the mall grungy is messing around with guys and they hold her over the railing but dreamy saves her
word gets out and she becomes popular as a survivor
but people drop interest in Alicia
also grungy turns away nine inch nails stoner
later she has her driving test and a few clashes with this mexico workers cause her to be distracted
she gets 0/10 and tries to talk her way outta it
later aliecai meets grungy and sez shes not a good match for step bro
but grungy bashes Alicia for being a virgin who cant dirve
I too am a virgin and don't drive
Alicia has a crisis about how she don't get anything
she walks about for like a few days or hours or w/e and realizes she likes her step bro
she tries to be smarter and nicer
she helps dad and he gives her advice
later she realizes everyone is special in their own special way
she gets into helping those in need of some Pismo beach disaster
nine inch nails stoner is in a 12 step program to get clean and invites her to a skateboarding thing
at the skate thing grungy sez sorry and they reconcile
also grungy gets back into nine inch nails ex stoner
while working with the lawyer thing Alicia screwed something up and a worker goes off on her a55 and leaves
step bro comforts her and they eventually kiss
the teachers get married and aliecuia catches the boquet
she makes out with her step bro
the end
that was fun
upbeat, cheerful, bubbly and just entertaining
good 90s classic about 90s teens and their 90s lives
needs more power rangers and batman though
nowadays the blonde bimbo would be the bad guy and the grungy chick would be the hero who overcomes her
but in the 90s, blondes were the good guys
sailor moon, sailor venus, princess peacg, princess Zelda, Barbie, samus, Goku, sonic, nami Koishikawa, sheena etranzi(contra hard corps), rainbow mika, guile, terry and andy bogard ect
for clueless 2 i'd like it to be the late 90s and shes pregnant with her step bros kid. also cuz of the screw up in the case, her dad got canned and has to direct p0rn0 for weird fetish purvoes. when he finds out his stepson was b0ning his daughter he tries to wack him and sends his p0rn0 actors after him to b0ne him dead. so the step bro fights em back to prove hes a man. also he got into roids and manned up after being b0ned by a big black dog he was trying to save from hunters  and is now a big buff guy played by hulk hogan and the nine inch nails ex stoner is on his side to fight through all the p0rn0e stars trying to ice him. its also a 2 player snes and sega genesis beat em up and each level is another weird purvo fetish

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