Sunday, March 22, 2020

Yogi Bear Review

Note: I spell worse than the average bear
Yogi Bear
This is my review on Yogi Bear friom 2010(the year of the 1ast robotech war)
i never saw this b4 but wattchied the 20th century cartoons in the 90s
but i never saw yo yogi
so it starts in jellystone park where the super volcano is gonna wipe out da urth and make us go promal rage 1 day and yogi f's a ppiccnicker for their basket
then title
the ranger is malciontent ovver things in tthe part aand not being so high  on the totom pole
so yogi sets up a trap for the next basket to be launched to him
as a fam comes the ranger gets there and sez there was a complaint about them and that bears should avoid people
then the basket flies by and yogi gets face pied
later a blonde  who knows wild nature ssh-t comes by to film a nature doc and wants to do it on yogi
so latr da mayor of w/e state this is in is gonna go governer and the thing is running outta cash
so he decides to f oveer jellystone for cash
so this stars dan aykroyd from crossroads, justin timberlake from some gasy bad in the 90s and anna faris from scaryu movie
so yogi falls on his fat a55 trying to jack a pic a nic basket andranger introduces yogi and boo boo to blonde wo trys speaking bear to em as she lived with bears for 6 months
is that a thing on grizzly man? the idiot who wanted to prove huans can live in peace with wild animald by living in alaska with bears?
he was eaten alive!
literally!!
Worst Crossover: Yogi Bear Vs Grizzly Man!
btw yogi and booboo are cg in a huan wotld like the sonic movie
so then mayor mcaids comes by saying the park burns more cash than it makes and if it dont make more cash, it can be reused for other stuff
and they got 1 week to get 30 000 $
and the proms tomorrow!!
then we hear weird al''s lasagna song as yogi and booboo live in a cave and yogi slapped together some cr-ppy air thing to snatch pic a nic baskets
so ranger comes by for missing fishing poles and wants yogi to stop stealing
in samurai times they used theives for sword testing
so rangger and his minion go up through da park to find blonde and ranger smith (like agent smith from the increasingly cr-ppy matrix movies?) has dinner with her
then yogi comes in with 100 $ he got from the park donation box
after a dance to baby got back, he trys to coome up with ideas to help the park but smith wants yogi to stay out of the thing
so blonde sees a season pass for 50 $ for a year, camping fees included and wants to doa 100th anniversery thing foor da park
blonde reorders the letters on a plane thing for a restaurent to advertize it and they try adverizing
mayor talks to disgruntled mintion in a sandwitch board who thinks these ideas s-ck and gets him to work for him to f the smith plans to becoome the 1st in command
but he was a boy scout and has more honor than becoming a starscream
huh, this movie got butt hammered by critics but made a lot of cash
so ranger smith tells malcontent it took him 12 years and this pushes him over the edge and he shoots yup the place, i mean, turns against him
so yogi cant resist his urge to jack food and has booboo handcuff him to a tree
after spazzing out he gets free
later malcontent ranger tells lies aboutr smith to trick yugi into f ing with agent smith, who i wanna call ranger gord after the red green show character.
then the song by poison: nothing but a good time, plays as yogi does a watch skiing thig
he sets hs cape on fire and spazzes out as rangger gord catches his fire baton from hittomg the fireworks
but tthey get hit and go off anyway and go at the crowd
its the zentraedi!! they've come for the protoculture!!
so things look f'd and ranger gord is gonna give up like in every movie like this
so gord goes and yogu is gonna give up on acting like a humanoid and live like a filthy wild animal eating animals he kills and poops on
malcontent ranger tunes up the vehicle he wanted to ride, like riki-oh ditching his evil twin bro to be a rch kid with a trycycle(this is canon. i read the manga) and drives in a circle
meanwwhile, smith is workking in the city cleaning up trash(is this soviet california? watch out for aids needles!!) and mayor tells starscream hes gonna clear out da trees
so yogi is trying to be average(which is pretty low if you look into it) and booboo gets him not to be but trees are being f'd down and yugi gets dressed with the superman theme
so yugi and bobo get to the city on a train and yogi gets butt hammered by a fence while getting in
in the city they f things up and meet angent smith and say sorry for not being caring of others
smith realizes the mayor is gonna do logging in da parek and gives up but yugi gives a speech to get him into it
they go back and see blonde freaking out a guard saying she lived with gorillas (and was probably b0ned by em) and knows primal rage
ranger smith sez sorry and they reconsile and they look through her footage to find boobooz et turtle is from an extinct race and as its endangered, the loggers cant cut.
wait, hes the last of his kind, and the chosen one, who can save his homeland?
what is this? breath of fire?!
so yogi lets it slip the turntle is in his lair and ranger gord gives up
but its ust a trap as he knows the forrest and drive to get it
starscream gets the turntle and outs it in a picnic basket and yogi uses his glider thing he macguyvered outta cr-p to drive off a cliff and fly over
so mayor aid sez to staarscream hes gonna log the park and whack the turtle and stalls for time as yogi sky dives to take the basket to save da turtle
and yogi's pickicn basket jacking sklls saved the day
so the glider f'd out and they use an eject raft to land in the river and yogo pulls in ranger gord and blonde who try to pull them to shore
yogi sends them to the rapids too avoid the baddz and they go over the falls but land in a tree branch thats always growing outta the falls
so then starscream comes by and sez sorry and atones for his sins by committing seppuku
jk he drives em back but mayor sez he's gonna get rid of da turtle and after a football thing, aid gets it and maoyr sez they has no eveidence to stop him
so the turtle gets away by using its yoshi tongue and mayor givs his campairgn video but ranger gord puts in the video booboo took of his tirade to expose him
the turlte found its way there and shows up next to them in front of da news and people and he's done
blonde jumps on aid like a snow leopard and i guess she's a furry and nd ranger and yogi say they like eachother as they are and to be happy as yourself
so people come to da park to c da trurtle and yoogiiss still jacking their baskets
blonde is into ranger and they're probaly gonna breed and have a dozen kids
yph ghi dives by with a  few picnic tables on his cart and ranger gord chades him
then credits to animation and 00s music
the end
that was not so bad
nice lite innocent family movie
no swearing or nude scenes or gore or deviants
just a nice lite story
yeah its not gone with the wind or ben hur or birth of a nation
but its not awful
its a decent movie thats somewhat entertaining and has a few good ideas
if you got kids or liked the cartoons of it as a kid, this is for tyou
for yogi bear 2 i want poachers to come for the turtle and once he's iced, the park gets burned down. so yogi moves in ith ranger and blonde in the city and meets a new crew of animal homies in the city a he trys to be cool and trendy and having slice of life adventures in the city and living in an apartment with ranger and blonde. also its a dating simulator game on nes, gameboy, master system, game gear, tg16 and atari lynx where you play as yogi in a lime green jacket and try to find a girl bear to breed with while solving crimes and fighting ninjas.

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