Friday, August 28, 2020

Flatliners Rview

 Note: Spelling right is 4 da dead

Flatliners

this is my review on flatliners from  1990

its directal by joel scjumacher who mae good stuff and cr-p and stars kirfer sutherland, julia roberts, billy baldwin, kevin bacon in my a55 and oliver platt

i saw it b4 and its srta like ghost from the same year

its also produced by michael douglas and has a cr-ppy remake i never saw

wtf, the 2017 ver is a sequel?! but its got da same title!

what is this?! Halloween and Shaft?!

so ater opening credits to chilling chior, it starts with keefer saying its a god day to die andthen these medical guys are dealing with a chick with an fd hemmorage

later this chick tells of her floating out of her body after bitng it aand going into the light and hearing The Vice saying he's keeping her baby but she goes back

others share their experiences annd later the chaaracteers traiining to be drs are chilling out and chatting

keefer is getting guys together for an experiment and julia robers (who's brother eric was in the human centipede 3 and A Talking Cat?!!) dont wanna be in it

1 guy got in trouble for helping someone wrong or something and keefer twists him into helping with his thing

so they inject keefer with drugs to kill him and lower his body temp to have him go through what happens when the body bites it, then pull him back to see whats beyond life

1 guy; if u die can i have your apartment?

thats good 90s dialogue!

no one sez dat anymore

so while he's in the beyond he sees a grassy field and people running in it but as they jerk him out he sees it going darker and creepier like Pumpkinhead from the 80s

after hes back, they walk around in blue night like a Tim Burton movie or The Bodyguard and keefer sez he feels and hears a dragging sound and kevin a55 bacon checks him out and finds physically hes ok

others in da gang wanna have a turn and keefer is seeing trippy things in da blue light of night

inclusing his pet dog

after some trippuy visions of eefer in the next realm, he's in bed and julia eric robertts is treating him and sez not to push it

also is this couple who wanted to get married but plan on it later (well... thats the end of them!!!)

so then julia robberts, wait, another guy trys the experiement and seez weird blue lited chock and hands

oh f! this was ripped off by Yugioh The Darkside of Dimensions manga preqquel Transcend Game where Seto nearly faced the Pharaoh and nearly bit it

so these dinks are amazed theres something beyond life despite Faith saying that for the ast several thousand years

its lke in pearl harbo where japan attacks soviet hawaii in 1941 and ben affleck or w/e sez "i think WW2 just started"

but kevin "backdoor" bacon sez he think they only see what they wanna see and wants to go for 2  mins under

keefer asks the guy if he had any neegative thing in his encounter and guy sez no

butt bacon chats with soviet julia roberts about him being a deniar of The Lord and julia sez a lot of peiple irregardless of prptoculture and faith  have the same experiences

later keefer sees his dog andfollows it through the blue night and finds a kid who kicks him in the parts and beats his a55

well... thaat came outta nowhere

holy cr--p we're like a 1 hour in with adds

that felt like nothing!

latwr the dream girl guy chats with another chick aboyt near dearh encountets

later keefer is running in fear from something but its not bad

later its a rave or something at college and they have a bonfre and oh its a  hallowwen party

so the ggang gets together on halloween to do a dedly experiment

that'll totally not turn into a horror movie

so  kwven bacon gets put to sleep and sees a montage of images including a child in da wombb and mountains of ice

girk dreamer starts seeing the dreamm girl in moniters and they bring backk sovirt kevin bacon as he has freeky visions

baconator keeps trying to rationalize his experiences and julia andd keefer bid on who gets to go nrext by bu,ping uphow long they'd be dead

later kevin i meen keedwr has a dream of the kid beating him up and spitting in his mouth

then we see his black kid swearing at either him or keevin in a scene that probably inspired that scene in Hook (which also had julia roberts)

so they put julia roberts to sleep (erikn brockavitch 2!! revenge of P&G!!) and sje sees freeky things  of a ww2 guy and flashing cameras, then kid her goes into a room and a shirtless man comes out and her mom gets p-ssed at her

so they try to bring her back but a fuse blows and they cant shock her back so they gotta CPR

kid julia in nightmare land sees a pickup truck wwith a bloaod soaked bullet hole in da back window as i guess someone ate his gun (Later used in the 3003 Texas Chainsaw Massacre reboot)

thhey use drugs to revive her and later, the guys who went under say they are being tormented by images od people they wronged

dream grl guy was taping women w/o consent and their sins are causing them damage

Now seems like a good time to go to Church

Get a Priest to remove the curse or go to Cofession or someething

so 1 guy tells julia of it and a flashback reveals keefr tormented the kd who beats on him as a kid and had him up tree in the dark world with his dog and threw rocks at him

bacon i thibktormented a ghetto kid and dream girl guy is approached by chix who hit on him

imagiine editing this to be "what gay guys deal with at clubs" as he tries to avoid them

then a real girl, oh its the near deth girl, found his tapes of him b0ning chicks and storms out

later in med class they are disecting corpses and julia  spazzes out and runs

baconemeets this black woman in this Pumpkinhead like woods area and sez sorry for being an a55 hole decades ago

meanwhile, keefer is attacked by the kid and when baconer comes back, its just keefer  fighting an item and spazzing out

so the gang reunites and julia is haunted by her dad who ate his gun cuz of her and they all bicker

backern comforts her and a guy tries to get keefer to a hospital but keefer runs and goes through the run dow slums of soviet california or w/e and they wind p in a graveyard with the tombstone of the kid he tormented who fell outta da tree and bit it

keefer yells at da stone and sez cuz he went t a home for boys he paid his union dues for killing a guy

so later julia "Te human sisterpeede" roberts is home and in a virtual boy game as its all red and reconsiles with her dad and its actually kinda moving

later kefer caffiene calls julias and sez hes going undef soo he can make amends for killing that kid

wouldnt the news have picked uup the story of a kid being iced by a classmate?

so feeder gives himelf the needle and goes to the next world and has flashes like a dreamm of the field annd the kid he iced and the gang gets there andtrys to savve him

in nigtmareland hes in da tree and the kid he iced is throwing da rox and its bee 9 mins

hes gonna be a brain damage!

so in nightmare land billy kno him outta da tree and as he falls hes adult feeder and the gang is beating on his corpse after like 12 mins

juia ggets bacin to give up and he sez sorry to God for going where man was not meant and as kevin bacin feels keefr dont deserve to go to h e doubl england, he zaps him

in dreamlandd kid smiles at keefer and walks off to h-ll as keefer runs back to life

keefer sez its not such a good day to die and we get orchestral music over a Christian painting in a Churech or something

the end

btw this was wide screen and the colors were murky at times but not dead looking like modern cr-p

i liked it though

it had heart and horror and good lights and music and feels

it worked and i think it was pretty good

also it has good flow and doesnt drag

it works and is a good late 80s early 90s fillm like thr Nina Turtles and Ghost

also some parts of thid reminded me of The Crow

For Flatlinwers 2 I want it to be the 2000s and Flatlining i becoming  trend by people who wanna see their sins and overcome them. it follows a new generation of malcontent teens who are disgrruntled with the crimes of their ancestors and do this to try to atone but find their self hate is really what they must atone for. also its an 16 bit sega geness, gba, snres, tg16 and atari jaguar game where you play as their ancestors who torment the teens into not hating their ancestors and you gotta maneuuver em to the goal with attacks and moving itemss around at em.


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