The Beach Girls And The Monster Review

Note: I spell ad but in a good way, like this ilm

The Beach Girls And The Monster

This is my review on The Beach Girls And The Monster from the itant fiture year to stalin of 1965(40 years before Transformers The Movie)

Its directed by Jon Hall who diected nothing I saw

It stars Jon Hall from Kit Carson (1940), Sue Casey from An American in Paris/The Big Trees/The Band Wagon/Rear Window/Breakfast at Tiffany's, Walker Edmiston from 1962 The Flintstones/Star Trek: The Original Series/The Monkees/Little House on the Prairie/The Waltons/The Transformers/Spider-Man: The Animated Series/Avatar: The Last Airbender/Ben 10/The Green Berets/Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory/The Transformers: The Movie/The Great Mouse Detective, Read Morgan from  The A-Team/60s The Twilight Zone/Back to the Future/The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension, Gloria Neil from The Dick Van Dyke Show/The Beverly Hillbillies, an a buncha guys not on back door, aid bag, gender offender, frooty booty, Sodom bottom, soy boy, beta male, banana crammer, Creator hater, queer as a eer with a steer in its rear, hippie stoner vegan peta tree kung fu base on plants, wikipeia, who avoids using peoples real names when they are insane.

I never saw this b4 but people say its so bad its good so i wanna see it

it starts with a surf song an bikini girls dancing an credits and title and a cr-ppy monster like a store bought power rangers thing

its in widescreen an b/w and 1 chick has a big butt

2 guys leave a fellow surfer to get food and hang with bikini girls to eat hot dogs

1 guy leaves the group to chase a bikini blonde and make out on the beach

she runs of and finds a cave and this cr-ppy seaweed sasquatch grabs her face and strangles her

in he real version they were b0ning and she died of butt damage

it lumbers of and a chick find her so they call da cops who come as this isn't soviet canada where it takes 53 mins for em to come

they ask the teens questions an find evolved footprints going to da ocean

later the paper spins to say a beauty clawed dead at beach

the nerd scientist sez its some animal that might've mutated and can breathe on land like the x men but cop thinks the teens iced her and don't trust teens

some guy talks to a lusty bartender chick who comes onto him and might be married to another guy and sez things of dad and he don't want her cuz lusty girls have diseases

wait i think the dad is the nerd and is there and the nerds son

after an accident he hangs out at a beach with lusty chicks and the lusty bar chick is his stepmom like that anime with the pokemon actors stepmothers sin

dr nerd likes his lusty new woman and is a good guy an his son use to aid him in the lab before the accident and the bar is in their big fancy house

later injured teen the son meets a devolved guy who has a film and wants to be a surfer not a scientist and marry his gf and the accident got him to see that

then we see a few mins of surfing footage to surfer music

also i'm not in a good mood when watching this after some bad luck and little things and my memories of anger getting to me

devolved guy shows son a mermaid statue he made after the chick who go it and he might want son to deliver it to her rents but he thins devolved guy otta

also devolved guy made a statue of the stepmom

son meets his gf whos not happy after blonde got it and wants to stay here a the pool

stepmom i think goes by saying shes going to model for a guy and is all 5kanky

sonwhines of stepmom being a 5kank and needs to get it an dad dont see how awfil se is

is it like courney love wacking kurt and he knew but went with it cuz he's a candy a55 beta male soy boy Creator hater?

gf swims in a shower cap like a sea shell and devolved guy has a crippled leg from i think the accident but dont swim and want to make a sculpture of stepmom but shes swimming for an hour

in the real version she was b0ning sea anemone like the 5kank in demon beast invasion who got fish pregnant

he goes off and the teens play in the poop i mean pool and make out

the seaweed sasquatch follows the 5kanky step mom but leaves her as i thin it dont wan he aids and she goes back to devolved guy

she sedce him but dont wanna b0ne a cripple and leaves so he hand crushes the statue

oh and he gave the dead chick fam the statue

at nights on picks up a an devolved guy who got no feeling in his dead leg

son dont wanna go to he lab an da thinks its wrong so devolved is let out of te car to walk to get used to his leg and they can talk

son sez at the accident he saw his life an its all work and he dont wanna go back a he has he money mom left him if hes a burden

dad thinks this is a good opportunity but son dont want it

in home stepmom b--ches at him saying stop whining of ur son and she dont like him

he crushes something in his hand to sand but i dint see

then its day and devolved guy lurks at the beach as bikini girls dance

i wonder if his man thing works or if its dead like his leg

in home da makes out with 5kany stepmom hes married to for 5 years and hes gay for her but she's a 5kank and wants men as she's tired of him being in a lab and she stays at home with no animals to b0ne

he offers to make it up to her and go to soviet Europe with the cannibals and butt hammerers

btw the monsters hardly is the as are the beach girls

much is some whiney losers whining like Degrassi or rebel without a cause

he dont want her going out cuz of the killer on the loose but she dont care

then a night fire of teens looking an dancing and probably smelling like cavemen

hay, his is clearly daytime an tinted blacker

2 teens go off to make out and the sea yokai is lurking around

it probably hates them being a straight white Christian bio legal age, same species couple and is triggered by it

1 teen plays a song on guitar about love or a while and a guy uses a lion puppet sez theres  monster in the surf and more singing of it

1 girl is a bit thiccer but not fat

they run off an leave a fire unattended an 1 forgot something

devolved guy whos probably been here all day j=rkin off his dead d0ng walks by and sees 1 teen attacked by the sea thing and calls son for help but he dont hear or care

the monster leaves atfer icing the guy who seems kinda black and his thicc gf finds devolved guy tending to dead bf and thinks he did him

cops eventually come and devolved guy sez he saw a monster and thick gf wigs out on him

the cops say cover the body and wait til the ambulance comes as they can help him with being dead and all

devolved guy limps off and steals a cop car and the cops open fire on him but stop

stepmom come back after sin and seems drunk

she finds a note saying come to my room when you get back from i think devolved guy

she eventually goes upstairs and the yokai grabs her and cuts her face and she bites it

all right rangers! We need thunderzord power!

devolevd guy comes home and we cut to i think son name Richard or dick like spotted dick the brits put in their mouth like with monkey pox, is driving his gf and talking of if it was a sea monster

son sez with radiation a creature can grow 3x its size and i think it was also atmospheric things like increasing the pressure can make fish grow like before the flood

he thinks theres a cave the thing is in and they go as she dont want him to go alone

its clearly day and the sun shines on the water and they tinted it darker and son goes in a tube or pipe in the beach alone even though she made a sin about not going back alone

he finds a cat and returns thinking theres nothing there and he needs another way to help devolved guy named mark like the guy in the room

markripple the devolved finds the 5kanky stempmoms shoes and finds the door locked so he jimmys it with a screwdriver and finds a monster head mask

then the real monster comes by an fights him as his punches do nothing

he eventually gets a knife an shanks it but gets his face cut up and the main character couple come home

they see the monster is the dad in a suit as the mask fell off and went nuts and he runs out and drives off like in dr mabuse or a clockwork orange

teens tell da cops and the cops get on it and i never saw this but think he might get it in a car accident or of his knife wounds

sherrif sez dad was icing teens for the son and they tail him or a while and he goes off the cliff and the car blows in a fireball for no reason

the cop an teens find him eventually and we see the car burning

the end

That was pretty fun

Its a teen movie and is mostly teens dancing and chat with a bit o monster

Its not trying to be The Ten Commandments or Metropolis, but has some good ideas

Its kinda fun and lite and no nue scenes or swearing

Its kinda clean, which modern teen movies don't do, but devolve to lust and sin

I mean the most teens to here is make out and the 5kank gets iced

Its like Breaker High or something

I'm writing this last bit after the movie after taking a sleep and having some cookies and milk, so I'm in a better mood

Its a entertaining movie and i didn't expect the dad to be the monster

but it makes sense as he said it might be a mutant to try to get the son back to work and hrow suspicion off him

thats kinda smart

and he debate of life vs work wasnn't bad

its sorta like Wild Guitar with its cheap teen style but I think Wild Guitar had more Charisma but cr-ppier acting

if you want a movie to enoy with drinking buddies and make comments at, this would be pretty fun

like The Final Destination or The Room, but those are more fun to joke of

and its like 70 mins, not a big time investment

Glad I saw this

For The Beach Girls And The Monster I want the son to us his science and surfing skills as 1 to come up with new surf moves based on animal styles like with kung fu of the monkey and crane, but the crippled guy is malcontent and makes a metal armor suit to attack teens for blaming him for icing the teen, and he lurks around taking out teens and makes sure to leave no survivors as they'd out im. Also its an 8 bit platform game on Nes, Game Boy Master System, Game Gear, TF16, Atari 7800 and Lyn where you play as the devo,ved guy nd sneak aound taking out teens but if 1 gets away you gotta try again.