Friday, September 6, 2019

A Few Good Men Review

Note: Imma good man. you can teel my by spell
A Few Good Men
This is my review on a few good men from like 92 or w/e
its got terry crewes i mean tom cruise and a breif appearence of jack nicholson
i've seen this b4 but that was decades ago
wtf the tv warning sez its got nude scenes
do we see tom crews naked?!
its widescreen
fix dat
so its at a military base by soviet cuba and these guys start attacking a guy at night and tieing hiim up
are they gonna b0ne him??
and this was during dont ask dont tell
so its directed by rob reiner qwho did stand by me, the princess bride and North
its also got demi moore, kiefer sutherland and kevin bacon
also xander berkley from candyman 001 and cyba gooding gx
so demi sez the guys who b0ned that guy killed him
i guess he was b0ned dead
the dead guy was a j-rkoff and the killers were good soldiers
she wants em tried in washing ton
after talking about her when shes out they bring her back and tell her shes off the case
as its probably gonna be a small thing
later tom crooz is playing baseball because he s-cked and a soldier wants him to deal with a sokldier who bought oregeno thinking its chronic
tom argues him down to a light sentence in the brig
where ernest borgnine will torture and b0ne him like in from here to eternnity
so tom crews gets the case and has to fly to an american base in soviet cuba
so tom goes theres and demi tells tom the dead guy tried to get transfered out
after that he figgers he can get the accused 12 years
they read dead guys letters and dead guy was gonna out a guy for shooting over the fence into soviet cuba by mistake
also he had heat exhaustion and the army p-ssed on him
keefer reports to jack nicholson and wait this is a flashback
jack dont look well on the dead guy and wants his f'd for not living up to his standards under a guise of being american
that sounds more soviet than amercian
also he's gonna ice eefer if keefer dont get dead guy's grade up
later demi busts toms a55 over not taking the case srs and how he dont care about it and is just eating time til he gets his service done
oh yeah and the rag the stuffed in dead guys mouth was poisoned and theres issues with the autopsy
tom gets 2 straight laced guys who are trained to start and end each sentence with sir to tell him what is a code red
oh its the guys who klled the guy
they said they were just gonna shave the dead guy but he died
and they didnt put poison on his rag
also they did it cuz he disnt respect the chain of command
the chain of command is unit, code, God, country
Country is above God?!
What is this?! England?!
oh and tom crews is defending em
btw code red reminds me of the mountain dew
so tom talks with a guy who thinks the accused need to be in jail
also 1 guy told tom that the guys were told by someone not to touch dwad guy
then the actually go to soviet cuba
i was wrong about it b4
tom needs to change his cloths as white makes them a target for the daemonic cuban commies
they meet jack nickleson ND jack knew toms dad
so tom and dem chex out dead guya pl;ace and keeefer blames dead guy for getting dead
later he eats lunxh with jacky and jackie sez he was gonna transfer dead guy out but he bit it b4 it came
demi asks him about code reds and that there was a memo sent out saying no code reds
jack sez demi outranks tom and he likes mouth b0ning superiopr officers
jack tells em off and shows hes not to be scared and tom asks for a copy of dead guys yransfer order
also jack tells tom to ask him nicely and calls his uniform f-ggity
surprised tom allowed that in this movie
then again, he was in interview with the vampire
at night some guy vanishes and demi bugs tom over it
also she thinks jacko ordered the code red
so they go to the accused and they tell him jack told them to code red dead guy
they never mentioned it b4 as tom never asked
these guys are freekin robots!!
might be all the forced vaccines like new york
also he told everyone publicly not to code red but went in their rooms privaTLY and told em to do it
man we're like an hour in
that didnt feel it
they tell kevin bacoon and he tells emm he cant help em and they should take da deel
tom tellls em the deal but they dont wanna take it as they were just following orders
as they'd get discharged after 6 months and they dont wanna give that up, they wont take it
1 guy goes on a turade abut how he has honor
what would you have?
or years of being bummed in jauil?
so toms had enough of this sh-t and wants to dump em
then we get a bmmer moment as tom needs to sit alone and think for a few mins at night
so like over an hour into the movie they have the court case
they say ten hundred
for the time
shouldnt it be one thousand?
tom realizes they chose him so the case wont make it to trial as he'd pleade em out
so he gets his engine gear on and jumps right into the work's a55
tom works out his defence for em
they were following orders and didnt put poison on the rag
so adter anothef few weeks they have the trial 1.5 hours in
the lawlethy sez the poison on da rag bled his lungs and killed dead guy
1st witness brings up the accused shoting at soviet cuba and how he was never charged
btw aparently this was written by the druggie who did the west wing
then cuba gooding II sez they were given the order by jaco o lantern not to tourn i mean touch dead guy
tom gets em to skip the other 22 guys who would say the same thing
a dr sez the poison made his lungs burn suger instead of oxygen and it made him bleed somehow
tom argues dead guy had a medical issue that made him burn suger faster
and gives evidence that he said dead guy had the same symptons that the cindition needed
and if a guy he gave a clean bill bitb it then he'd be in the cr-pmobile
so they call the trial untol ten hundred
its not ten hundred you inbred cannibal!!
its one thousand!
even freekin yugioh didnt say that!!
learn tio count!!
after that 1 guy goes on a tirade over demi and toms screw ups and how the case is going in the toilet
later tom cruise is watching baseball because he has no soul and baseball s-cked as bad as his character and demi comes by to have him to dinner at a seafood place
i thought she was jewish
aat dinner he thinks hes gonna loe the case and those kids are gonna go straight to h e double cuba
at court later he interviews a guy who got a code red for dropping a weapon and how 1 guy protexcted dead guy from code reds
attack lawyer exposes that code red aint in the manuel or rule book
so tom points out the dinner area aint in the book either and he still ate
later its night a guy who was missing who signed the transfer order 5 days affter dead guy went to h e double italy sez jack nixheklson was behind it and gives tom more info by showing up in the back of toms car
is he a ninja?
tom tells becon who sez if they asccuse jack without enough evidence they get court marshalled
so this is what happened to that guy after the dance in footloose
next day he cross examines keefer souther land over his ranking of dead guy
southernman sez he only reeports to nicholson and God
keefer had a man kept from food and drink except water for a week but he dont consider it a code red
and f\d over a guy for brringing the guy food
that happened in riki-oh!!
this ripped off riki-oh!
the guy was one of the accused
and after thar punishment he learned not to disobey orders
tom points out after that he''d not go against orders
like da order to not touch dead guy
then its night and he finds kevin nichelong (jack ) edited info to make the logbook say cr-p tha helps him
at night the car guy puts on his uniforne and eats his gun as he dint wanna testify
what are you? a samyurai?
thats cultural appropriation!
plus samurai use katana
i want a feudel japn ver of this where we see him going seppuku
one witness who was the other of the accused cracks under pressuree of the cross examination and names the other guy as the source of the order as he was out when other guy got the order
so tommy gets drunk and hits her
he did not hit her
he did nooooooooot!!
he gives up on the case and demi sez he asked jackolson for the transfer as he wanted to see his reaction
tom goes mental and acts like a j-rkoff jim carrey and trashes the place like tommy wiseau
the guy ate his gun
this ripped off the room
but 4 duimensionally
so then we get another bummer moment where jack nicksolion i meen tom croos thinks of his dad
so tom decides to put nicklesin on the stand and lure him into saying it as jack dont wanna hide it
after tom finds out demi put his bat in the closet, he whines and gets it
then gets an idea and goes out and does stuff
b4 trial a chick tells tom not to go after jacky if he cant get him
so jack gores on the stand and repeats his lies
tom points out that dead guy didnt pack or call anyone b4 his alleged transfer
jack tells him he dont know why dead guy wasnt ready and to get on with his case or let him out as those accused are on trial and need more than this
clever girl
mocking him while faking care
so jacko walks off but tom gets p-ssed and calls hiom back
he brings up hes got 2 witnesses that wiill counter jacks testifmony afterward
tom sez if jack gave orders not to touch dead guy, why was he in danger and needed to be moved?
tom gives a buncha accusations and sez he wants da truth
jack sez u cant hamdle the truth and sez killing those who go against the protoculture saves lives
he goes on a tirade about how he and his forces defend freedom and are needed
good points
but killing the innocent isnt the way
just kick him out
so he asks if axk ordered the code red and jack admits it
hes arrested and sez tom weakened the country after saying hes gonna take out toms eyes and p-ss in his skull
so the accused are found not guilty of killing but are gyilty of unecoming conduct and are kicked outta the service
1 accused is confused about why hes guilty as he was just following orders
the other sez they let the guy they killed down
tom admits to kevoon the witnesses he said he'd call was a bluff
the end
tom cruise gets higher billing than jack nicholson?!
thats f'd!!
david bowe was in this
not the guy from the vampire movie i did who got aids
as is james brown
and jeff jones
lots of celeb sound alikes
but i liked this
good dialogue
good acting
good 90s music
good story
it was well made
its got flow and doesnt drag
its got heart and a good twist ending
they win, but with a catch
like league of super evil
but this was pretty good and even the bad guy makes good points and isnt fully bad
sorta like robotech
you can understand him
sorta like with magneto from x men
or anatole leonard in robotech how he was malcontent over his planet nearly wiped out by alien attacks so he'd give the enemy no quarter
for a few good men 2 i want it to be a few months later and the base has become weaker with the new soft candya55 leading it. he thinks all problems can be talked out and isnt on guard. eventually the cubans attack and start b0ning and eating the people alive. when the people try to fight back, they are given orders not to hurt the enemy and to talk their issues out. this leads to many men to be eaten alive til they are dead. but a small gorup of soldiers who didn't lose their edge stands up and fights the invaders with modified weapons to blow them to chunks. its also an 8 bit run and gun game on sega genesis, snes, atari jaguar, tg16 and gba where you play as 1-4 soldiers and fight off the cubans in the area.

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