Thursday, October 8, 2020

Brighton Rock Review

 Note: I spell bad but in Engkand its good (Cuz soviet england is bozzzarro world to America)

Brighton Rock

this is by review on Brighton Rock from the distant future year of 1948

its been remaade closer to the book its based on but i hear this one was better

its been banned in new south wales (i don't know what that is) cuz its too much for the candya55es who live theere

show those dinks urotsukidoji eith chcks tentacled til they rupture!!

they'd spazz out and die!

it stars Richard Attenborough from jurassic park 1 2 and a recording in world, and no one else i recognize

its directal by johnny Boulting who did a buncha cr-p i never heard of

i never saw this b4 but its on tv and as its too bada55 for soviet england, i otta watch it

this was also ratch 16+ in soviet france, iceland and norway and 18+ in the netherlands

oh and its banned in sweden cuz they're a buncha wieners

its written by graham greene who was not mr crabby apple tree in udley the dragon and the guy in die hard 03

so it starts with clips of the fim showing who plays who and a scrolling text sayingg the place its set is good now but in the 30s was mad ma or detroit

so a paper sez a gangster is found wacked in some place and this thin moustache guy tell his homie about an article thats gonna f this guy named pinky

he showws it to pinky (richart attenborroew)

later these brittmoes go to a guy named fred like the scooby doo guy and are gonna f him up

he has a last drink amd the britmoes bust some glasses and leave after paying

oh and the article said this gguy named fred is going around town and if you guess its him u win a prize of cash

and the fred nearly f'd was not him i think and pinky wants revenge on fred

ait i think it is fred and he runs through town to escape and gets on a boat but the britmoes find him

they go off as theres too many witesses and fred chats with some chick

he goes around an amusement part and gets wacked somehow(i wasnt paying attention)

so the britmoes are working for pinky and thin moustache is one of em and they have these cards freddy was gonna hand out

so pinky goes oyt to a restaruant annd meets a chick aand they have a nice moment

oh and pinky had his homies hand out cards as an alibi for him not being where fred was when he got wacked somehow

in a bar a fat chick in a clown costme goes a pasychic thing to choose random letters to solve the case and  she sez its a message from fred

later pinky chats with another chick (or maybe its the same one) and se a chick who went against da mom got her face chopped up

spoiler; scars are bada55

thry go inside and its revealed both are Catholic anf piny knows of h e double england

so later pinky slashes a guy in da face with a straight razor as da guy sez he's got protection and pinky and his droogs leave

oh and the chick in the restarunant saw one of pnkys homies pplant the card there and piky knows

so pinky meets a guy with napoleons furniture who has a lot of cash andchick meets the fat chick who asks about who left the card

chick sez she dont recall and calls pinky who just left

so da cops get a visit from fat chick who sez chick knows something and fred was afraid of a guy she saw at the station

but they say the case is closed

pinky meets chick at an amusement part and sez feeddy is dead but she sez the fat chick knows

so later at da race ttrack piky has the guy who hick saw leaving the card iced at a braawl he starts

at home he tells chick he was defending his friend and thin moustache comes by and a guy comes by to see inky

pinky wants to marry chicj and the carc guy comes bback alive butpinky shoves his a55 down a gap n the stairs that go around the walls

a witness is gonna book it but pinky sez to say it was an anccident

it was pretty bada55 how he fell and slanmmed

so they get married i think and pinky makes a recording of his voice saying "you want me to say i love u, but really i hate you you little sl-t"

they goo to a hotel or w/e for their honey moon and fat chick is there and sez the 2 L's in her message meant they kiLLed fred

she pieces together the facts of who wacked who and later, at the gang place, main guy(i forgot hisname, oh wait. pinky) admits to thin moustache he wacked the guy and thn moustache getts p-ssed as i guyss they were b0ning

so chick is met by fat chick who wants to help her escape pinky and tell da cops da trooth but she dont consent

pinky comes home and sees her leaving and goes up and chickk wrote a love note for him as he did the record she never heard but thinks is a love note

so fat chick gets mpre info on the case and piky is worried chick might betray him and wants to ice her to keep her from telling

she comes back and he tells her he wants to book it and she gets upset as she actually cares for him even if he's the bad guy

so pinky goes out with chick and fat chick sees em and tells da cops he's got a  gun in his pocket (which in america is a right but in soviet england is a crime)

so i think pinky is gonna suicide and gets her to cap herself even though she knoes its a sin

she say a prayer and just like in birth of a nation with the good guys heading to save the day, the cops come as shes gonna o it andshe throws the gun away

the cops come for him and as he dont wanna drop the soap, he spazzes out and falls into the water and seemingly bites it

later she's all f'd up and wants to go to h-ll to be with him(thats not how it works, you are each in your own dark hole in there being f'd a lot) and a nun sez pinky loved her and thats some kind of hope

she plays the record and it skipps when it sez "i love you" and don't say the mean stuff

then it zooms in on the cross to show her salvation and the credits roll

the end

but in the book it played the full message

i liked it and felt this had some good stuff in it

dark and gritty ans the main character is kind of the villain like a loon chaney movie

good Catholic themes of not suiciding

the girl is innocent and a kind soul and has purity even with pinky's evil

good b/w and full screen look and its kinda bada55

i can see how some 40s dinks might not take it, but its owhere near as rough as 80s things

h-ll the 60s had the last house on the left

this was a well made film and holds up

for Brighton Rock 2 i want it to be ww2 and piky has been found tohave survived the fall and was swept out to sea and an italiano boat saved him. he lost his memory and has been living in italy under the italian stallion; mussolinni! then its ww2 and he is sent on a mission to take out a deviant brittish general who captures italianoes and uses them as butt slaves and he finds the chick he was married to is a maid for him and she tells him she was married to him. his memory is gone but he feels a connection so he believes her words about him. also he works with her to bring down the deviant general and they escape to italy. its also an 8 bbitgame boy, nes, master system, game gear, tg16 atari 7800 and lyxn game where you go around in a metroid vania setting and sneak through the generals evil castle with men devolved into maniacs from beign butt hammered toomuch and they crawl around on all 4's as their butts were destroyed.

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