Sunday, May 8, 2016

Pee Wee's Big Adventure Review

note; I can type I just don't care to be good
pee wees big adventure
this is my review on pee wees big adventure
I love this film
it starts with pee4 wee winning the toor de france
he dominates the other racers
he must be on super roids to out run those rioded racers
but its a dream
he wakes up and plays with toys
how old is he?
he lives in his own house
but acts like a kid
nowadays we might consider him challenged and on disability
hes kinda like spongebob
his place is a crazy funhouse like the joker would have
hes got a weird a55 breakfast machine that looks awesome but wont work in real life
he talks to his breakfast and pays with tape on his face
wait, hes having bacon??
I thought he was jewish
his lawn is full of weird cr-p too
I love this
he goes out and gets his super rad bike
he loves this bike
I hope he don't b0ne it
I saw on a brittish show was a guy with a harem of bikes which he b0nes
thern pee wee faces his rival
fransis is just as child-y as peewee
he wants peewees bike
but wee wee wont sell it
fransis is plasyed by a good actor
in 1 scene he seems sad or sympathetic
in the next hes like a cartoon villian
youill be sorry, peeweeherman!
pee wee goes out and does tricks on his bike but crashes
hes ok
I just realized hes ot wearing a helmet
surprised they can show this now
safety nuts go mental when someone don't wear a helmwet
unless they have a turban
peewee goes to a mall and chans up his bike with a really long chain
in the real version you can see the chain coming from a hole in the bin
but this is da widescreen ver
he visits a majik shop and gets some items
this would make a great videogame
at the bike shop this chick dottie wants to date him
peewee sez hes got things about him that she wouldn't like
is he queer or something?
is that what hes trying to tell her?
he goes to his bike but its gone and he blacks out
he goes to look for it but only sees people riding bikes
its not sad at all
you really see how tim burton made this great
its funny and has good camera work
most films have a tacked on sad moment to make the audience feel bummed
not this one
or commando
he trys going top the cops but they got better things to do
he goes after fransis thinking he took it
fransis is taking a bath(in a pool o\in a swimsuit)
peewee comes in and they battle
man peewees mental
man how old is fransis?
he lives with his rents and accts immature
then again that could apply to most 20-40 year olds today
fransis's dad alibi's him and peewee gives them trick gum he got at the majik shop
peewee spreads word of his bike and fransis cant take it
turns out he had a guy swipe ity and now don't want it anymore
so he pays the guy to get rid of it
why not have it sent back to peewee?
otherwise peewees gonna keep going mental and might trace it back to him
peewee calls a meeting witjh over 200 pieces of evidence
he starts with exhuibit a and its all meaningless cr-p
3 hours later he's only on exhibit q
that don't add up
later he wanders the streets in the rain and when a gang attacks him, he freaks em out with a hiss
maybe his ki charged and freaked em out
he's pretty bad a55
pee wee herman is bad a55
he sees a fortune teller who tells him the bike is in the basement of the alamo
he hitchhikes and gets a guy in a car who brioke outta jail
the guy cut off a "do not remove under penalty of law" tag from a matress
remember from degrassi high when wheels tried hitchhiking and a gay guy picked him up and tried to seduce him?
hope peewee don't get b0ned
the ex con lights a cigarette then immediately throws it away
as they drive, the bike is seen on a truck going next to em but turns away
they run int0 the cops and the con wants to shoot his way out
but peewee disguises them and he dresses as a wo man
kinda like with lancer in robotech
not at all suspect
later they're driving and the con talks about prison
he mentions; long showers!!
he sez; you'll get used to it
later peewweweeas driving at night and accidentally drives off a cliff
he opens the convertible roof and they float down
the con warns him not to get mixed up with him using similar words peewee used with dottie
in the dark he just has eyes floating in the shadows
he uses an item he got from the majik shop and sees himself surrounded by beasts
I assume he kung fu fought em
hews picked up by "large marge" a trucker who tells a scary story
she turns her face into freaky Claymation to show what the victim in the accident looked like
after he's dropped off he sez she sent him
turns out large marge was the one in the accvident
he was picked up by her ghost
he has dinner but his wallets gone so he does dishes
the maid Is French but actually nice despite it
her and peewee go into a dinosaur thing to watch the sunrise
but her boyfriend follows
peewee and the frenchie talk about dreams
she wants to go to france
but her jealous bf is holding her back
this is actually pretty well done
her bf listens and thinks he's b0ning her
the next day the bf tries to kill pee wee with a big bone
hes trying to b0ne him
but peewee jumps on a train
he has a weird dream with Claymation
nowadays it would be cgi
and look cr-ppy
on the train he meets a hobo
they sing 1800s songs and peewee eventally gets sick of it
he jumps outta the train and is in texas
at the Alamo he goes on a tourguide tour
but after it he finds theres no basement
later the frenchie meets him and sez she broke up with her bf and is going to france
he calls dottie and sez hes sorry for being a p o s
dottie is played by e g daily
the voice of tommy from rugrats, buttercup from powerpuff girls and the chick who was half naked in valley girl
at the bus stop he runs into the bf again
after a chase he dresses up as a cowboy but gets pulled into a rodeo and gets tossed around
the bf gets xhased away by a bull and peewee is dragged off to saftey
I notice the bf looks a bit like mr Edwards from little house on the prarie
pee wee then goes into a bar to use the phone but the biker gang who dominates the bar has issue
esp when he accidentally knocks over their bikes
they're gonna ice him but 1 biker chick(played by Elvira; mistress of the dark) wants to b0ne him
peewee uses his last request to dance to the song tequila
this wins over the bikers and they love him
he rides off but runs into a sign and in the hospital has a freaky nightmare of evil clowns
so that's wjhere tim burton got the joker
and the MIRROR scene in batman
and the arches/checkerboard floor in beertlehjuice
also the buike is lowered into a burning cauldren
like mj in spiderman vs the kingpin
when peewee wakes up he sees his bike on tv gives to a child star
he goes to the WB studio and findsthe kid who has his bike is a butthole
but he plays a good kid
so peewee dressed as a nun takes his bike back
I thought he was jewish
then theres an epic chase across the wb lot
his bike has several super powers
what is this? the mock 5 from speed racer??
this really IS da best bike in za warudo!
they bust through several movies being filmed
including a Christmas movie
I thought he was jewish
and a Japanese Godzilla film somehow bering filmed in California by wb
kinda predicting the 2014 godzuilla
oh and twisted sister playing a music video
I love this movie
when im really watchin it im smiling through most of it
wtf his bike has rocket boosters
he finds a burning petstore and saves the pets
wtf theres a chimp in the pet store
they sell chimps?!
man the 80s were awesome
although chimps are very dangerous
later he meets with the wb head and is offered a movie deal to use his story
he gets his bike back and later goes to the drive in with dottie to see his movie premier
also most of the characters from his adventure make one last cameo at the premier
the movie has james brolin as "pw herman" and morgan Fairchild as dottie
also theres ninjas and soviets and the bike is called the "x-1"
peewee himself has a cameo and hes pretty awful
also his voice is dubbed over
as a kid I thought that's just how he acted in movies
but pee wee and his droogs love it guv nuh
fransis claims he was the one who taught peewee how to ride a bike and is peewees blood brother
when he sits on the bke peewee uses the ejector seat and fransis flies
peewee and dottie leave to b0ne instead of finishing watching the movie
peewee sez; I don't have to see it dottie, I lived it!
thr end
what a great film
I loved it
one of the better burtons
and its mostly clean
kids can see it but so can adults
btw, fransis is really good at being the villain
deliciously evil
I hear he played gacy in one movie
hope he does more stuff
he's pretty good
for peewees buig adventure 2 I'd like for the French chick's ex bf to return with cyber parts and be hunting down peewee for revenge. also large marge returns as a ghost and becomes ghost armor for peewee to fight him. and fransis is revealed to be the one who payed for the bf's cyber upgrades. also the magic shop guy has an epic battle of science vs magic with the cyber bf and dottie is really really pregnant with peewees kid and has gained a lot of weight.

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