A Bucket Of Blood Review

note; my typing is cr=-p alicious

a bucket of blood

this is my revuiew on a bucket of blood

it starts with a beatnik saying a bad poem in a offee house

good music though

gross!

its widescreen!

find da cure!

after the poem the main guy's boss busts his a55 over him looking at a drawing for a few secs

then a guy calls in to a cop and I think hes underxcover looking for druggies

the bad poem guy sez he never says the same thing 2x, not even his poems

he also bashes men in the service

what a p o s

my great grampa's fought for Austria in ww1

the main guy says poetry to some rich people and they like him but his boss busts his a55

on his way home he sees a couple making out in a convertible

I assume they were b0ning in the Japanese version

the guy goes mental at him for looking

don't show it off if u dont want it seen

at home he starts making something out of clay

but he s-cked at it

plus a lot of things add up and stress him

a cat gets stuck in a wall and when he tries to cut it out he shanked it by mistake

he feels bad about it

once I accidentally stepped on a spider and felt guilty

but spiders are cool

like daem'ons

he covers the cat in clay cuz of inspiration from the beatnik poem from b4

he brings it to the coffee house and its pretty good

the movie tries to make it look like his stuff is good only cuz he traced real stuff

but he gets expression and feels down so its more than just tracing

the cat is put  up in display

the poem reader from the start loves it and declares him to be an artist and genious

his boss gives him the night off and a fan gives him an item

at home a cop comes by and tries to book him for having heroin

the cop pulls a gun on him and the main guy busts his head open like a watermelon with a pan

after calming the landlady about the noise, he starts mopping up the cops blood(which is pouring out like a sink(which means he must've really smashed his skull apart)) he gets an idea

meanwhile a guy damages the cat and sees fur coming out

later at the coffee house is a guy singing about a murderer going down

also a guy wants the cat statue for up to 500$$

the main guy sez his next art is called "murdered man"

he brings a chick and a guy to his place to show him it and its got its head split openlike in Hokuto no ken/fist of the north star

they love it

'oh, the guy is his boss

ansd hes nervous cuz he knows the main guy is building around corpses

but he wants the main guy to have an art show with his awful works

later the main guy is accepting his new role as a art hero

this blonde chick in a tim burton ish shirt comes in and wants to model 4 him

the beatniks want him to do nudes

aint a real artist unless u do nudes, they say

guess that makes go nagai, toshio maeda, and masami obari real artists

she p-sses him off and they clash

later he gets her to come by for nude modeling

we never even see her big b00bs

just her back

he strangles her with a scarf

later he goes to the place the beatniks are squatting in and they are eating hippie non gluten non carb non food

he shes em his new "art" and they love it

te poem guy makes a new poem for him and says it at the coffee house

his pome references necromance and killing

I just realized that the curvy blonde bit it in here

just like paris Hilton in house of wax

or the chick in psycho

but I think this came 1st

while drunk he enjoys being seen as a hero and wants to make a lotta more statues

he then saws off a guy's head to make more art

he brings in this head of clay the next day and his boss feels responsible

but the main guy cant stop cuz he don't wannna go back to being a bus boy

later he tries asking a girl out and sez he wants to marry her and stop making statues

she was the only one nice to him and hes gay 4 her

but she only was nice to him cuz she liked his art

the main guy don't take this well

he wants to make a statue of her

at the art show, she finds a piece of the blonde is off and theres human skin under it

the main guy tries to get to to accept it but she runs

the other guys at the show find out and go after him

as the main guy runs he hears the voices of those he iced

he cant take it and goes home

good thing this is about to end

I gotta take a big black strawberry marshmallow dump!

when they get to him they find he hung himself and smeared clay on himself

the end

for a bucket of blood 2 I'd like for the art to have gone on to have inspired a cult that abducts people and either makes them artists, or art, based on the dead artists works in the 1st film. also the poem guy with the beard from the 1st film is their leader who also tries to control the weather with human sacrifices and when anything happens with the weather, he says "its cuz of meeee!!" and anyone who disagrees is ritual sacrificed to control the weather.