Monday, January 28, 2019

Victoria The Great Review

note; f England and my cr--ppy a55 remote
Victoria the greart
this is my review on Victoria the great from 1937
I wanted to watch it from the start but my remote f--ked out on me and it took almost 10 mins to change the channel
so I missed the 1st buncha mins
around 6 mins in I got on and I cant find this a55 movie online as youtube is gay so I missed the start
according to Wikipedia kind William 04 went to h-ll and his niece Victoria was made queen of soviet England
so this film was made as according to demented brit law in the 30s, you cant show the royal fam as a play as they are superior to the pee-ons who worship them
so they made a movie based on the play they couldn't show
1st this, then la blue girl, then the human centipede
is there anything soviet England wont ban??
make me glad to be American
we get freedom of speech and all men are created equal
so queen vic is the regent of those ape like Englishmen and her mom is german
the right honorable Kaiser Wilhelm II was part brit part human too
but he hated his Englishness
like Trudeau in soviet Canada
not gonna lie; the french kinda s-ck too
so they have a ritual to make vic their queen
wtf they call her queen of this realm
do the brits plan to conquer this dimension too?
this isn't mortal kombat and she's no shao khan!!
then also refer to her as their divine majesty
shes a queen. not a god
or is this like north korea where they see their ruler as one??
after she's crowned a bunch of probably neutered boys sing high notes
those brits probably made their parts into one of their cr-ppy foods
later she goes to the galloping gala and has her fave horse leopold
was she the queen who got b0ned by her horse?
or was that Catherine the great??
but her advisors don't want her to use her horse homie
she does it anyway
later her advisors want her to breed to continue her evil bloodline
prnce albert (which is also the name of a b0ner piercing) don't wanna marry her after reading of bugs that eat their mates
are the brits bug people??
it would explain their devotion to their queen
he postpones and vic is disgruntled
on this boat in the rain these guys sing in german
surprised they are allowed
oh I think 1 is albert
they go to the queen area to meet her but r late
she goes out after getting impatient and they don't have anything to wear over their jammies
oh 1 is prince ernest
they come out in suits and meet her
1 sez he found a beetle with 4 legs and has pix
she sends the rest away and sez she's not gonna eat him
also she calls him cousin
are they inbreeders?
gotta keep that blood blue
then its 39 and theres a dinner party
at it she asks ernest if he could ditch his bro albert
she was an olny child
maybe she wants to ritual sacrifice his bro to make him feel like her
vic dances with al and they are thrilled like they just b0ned
he tells her geezer homie she made her choice
later she shows albert a new invention; photographs
what year is this??
they have pictures from years ago so i'm not sure when cameras were inventd
she sez wants him to marry her
they get wedded
its actually kinda nice
later they take a new invention; the steme engine
man it looks like a toy train
its like streetcar sized
like that electric train thing they have in san fran sicko
so they go to gemany I think and sit under a tree and sing in germanese
also she don't wanna talk politics
a ruler of a country don't like politics
later al and vics advisers are telling em how the people might talk or w/e
later al tells vic about all the red tape to do stuff in his country and she thinks hes smart for it
later they are sitting on a couch and their slaves or w/e are around em
oh and 1 guy plays piano
1 guy sez smoking is banned in the palace
the smokers gotta smoke in secret by a chimney
even in the 40s or w/e, there was a resistance against the regent
later I think she catches al smoking and gets p-ssed
he locks himself in a room from her
later he writes something and she signs it without reading it
clockwork orange guard; DONT READ IT!! SIGN IT!!
later the brits are malcontent over the queen oppressing them
time never change
1 guy sez their kids bit it in the factories but his accent made me think he said in the secks pit
1 guy opens fire in al but it gets his hat
maybe this is where the brits got the idea to have archduke Ferdinand whacked to take down germany by starting ww1
later she poops out a prince who is the 1st something in 100 years
is this like in Abashiri family where only makes were born to the clan for generations??
then theres a riot and the people try to take down the regent
also the people want the regent to repeal the corn laws
I assume they criminalized putting corncobs in their butts
Disraeli gives a speech in the parlement and don't like al
after al gets back from parlement he says his side won but he hates parlement
good thing the regent governs without consent of the pople
that's not good
then theres text saying lord Palmerstone (pit the elder!!) is doing something
india had a riot and I think there was a war
later theres issues with the southerners or something but I don't know what that means
then peop;le dance to bag pipes and it looks like a silent film with the camera work
then al gets a note from America
they go back and chat with Palmerstone and theres stuff of people hating al for being a german
that's racist
al is the most hated man in England and Palmerston is the most loved
so queen micheal vick threatens to ditch the job if they don't follow her orders
maybe they can have an equal rule where the people choose their leaders?
rose palmer stone says America might invade Canada (GOOD!! FIX THAT CESSPOOLE!!) and it might be the end of ameirca
I think this is the civil war
ok I checked wikepiedea and it sez Palmerstoner wants to side with the confederates
ironic as America started as a rebellion against England
now England is helping a rebellion
later albert is mental and keeps calling for ernest (p worrel?!?!!)
then he bites it
man this film is got like 20 mins left
that went by quick
she gives up on things and stays in the castle for years
its like miss Havisham from great expectations
then people give speeches about how they hate her or w/e
im surprised they are allowed to not like her
you'd think the people would be executed for that
or the loyal brits would cut them open and eat their guts while b0ning em for the crime of disagreement
later the prime minister Gladstone (the Disney duck!?) comes in and sez she should show herself to the public
but she don't consent
so he goes mental at her and starts b0ning her while taking bites outta her and foaming at the mouth and screaming like a maniac
he just sez her hiding wouldn't have been albert's wish
then text sez its the distant future year of 1877 and she regains her chutzpa and ruled the "greatest" period in England
a guy talks about how in her rule they got machines
yeah that was totally cuz of her
and kids/ chicks don't work in the mines or factories
but men gotta?
that's racist!
1 guy calls her queen and empress
that's like saying president and vice president
also she sez theres no racism anymore
yet today brits beat up poles
fine job you did getting rid of racism a55 hole!
she goes on about freedom and tolerance
odd that Canada and its universities fear those things
and since when was England ever free?!
they ban movies from everyone in the country for a scene that triggers 1 crusty old brit at the bbfc
they banned dog the bounty hunter from entering cuz a lifetime ago he was a getaway driver to a guy who iced someone
h-ll their other subsidiaries are just as bad
new Zealand banned power rangers
buncha candy a55 dinks!
then its 1897 and shes been on the throne for 60 years
I recommend serious term limits!
all thses dinks cheer for their master and owner
she asks her God to bless her people
which God?
isn't she the DIVINE queer??
remember when henry 08 put himself above God and made his own church?
in a man for all seasons he had that guy executed for not agreeing with his lie of being better than God
they play the song God save the queen which makes me wonder what they are asking her to be saved from
probably the souls of those she wrongfully oppressed and took out
then again, the current queen had daiana and chales other chicks iced
then end
I gotta say
I liked it
I like historical films and 30s films and fulscreen and b/w films
yeah I b--ched about England the whole film but this was well made
its like they say; love the sinner, hate the sin
so we can hate England and love their movie by reverse logic
the film had heart and feels and good emotion and love
I don't know much about that queen but I learned a few things like shes german and so is her bf
its like 2 hours long with out adds and an extras half hour with em but didn't feel it
im glad I finally got to watch this as I missed it b4 and almost missed it again
for Victoria the great 2 I want it to be about her ghost being summoned in a ritual by the brits to try to help them win ww1 but she is disgruntled by being pulled outta h-ll and their german hate and wants to cost em the war so she goes around possessing brits and making em get iced by walking into spikes or jumping into acid. mainly high rank brits needed to win the war. its also an 8 bit Gameboy, nes, sega master system and game gear and Atari lynx and turbografx 16 game where you play as the queens ghost and gotta make all the main brits in the area get iced to move to the next. its like a puzzle platformer game.

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