Thursday, August 4, 2016

Dr X Review

niote; is my typing better? mayyyyybeee
dr x
this is my review on dr x
the 1930s horror film
the color is weird
like... not fully colored
sorta faded yet a bit sepia
its got faye wray from king kong
I think its got a bit of feel like the bat whispers
both were from the early 30z
it starts with the whole cast named on one page but not who they play
not that you'd know any of em
this guy is on a dock and smoking during a storm
its also a full moon
then a car drops off a dr at a morgue
a reporter tries to get in but is denied
he goes to this home and uses the phone
in the home is a blonde
he tells his paper that a chick was brought in the morgue after being iced weirdly
also each full moon someone gets iced
wait I think the home is a bar
after he leaces he gets a cigarete from a cop and joy buzzers his hand
he then sneaks into the morgue
at the autopsy they find shes strangled and has a wound on her head back
he suspects cannibalism
you are what you eat
its natural
animals do it
if we wernt meant to eat eachother we wouldn't have the desire to
this is the 6th wacking with a strangling and knife wound
the dr suspects the cannibal is mentally ill
what about that german guy who put an add out saying he wants to eat someone
then someone replied
then they gayed out and he ate him at the same time
that's what I call
a food fetish!!
after everyone leaves the reporter gets off the table as he was under a cover disguised as a corpse
this reminds me of alexander knox in 89 batman by tim burton
a fun character in a weird f'd world
later the dr is in the library and his daughter comes in
she freaks out for some reason
I think that's faye wray
she looked better as a blonde with long hair
but most women do
turns out a dr welles is working at the institute at night
he also studied canibalism
modern cannibal students probably watch horror movies non stop
spoiler; silence of the lambs s-cked!
no gore
no cannibalism
its gay
imagine a kung fu movie where the guy said to be a kung fu master never fughts or raises his hands over his nipples
bait and switch
dr welles has kept a heart alive for years in a jar
also he has a prosthetic arm
also 2 people on a mission were lost at sea and the 3rd guy with em was missing
they aid he drowned at sea
they probably ate him
in mexico or w/e this boat with 2 guys was swept out to sea
13 months later they found 1 guy
he said the guy didn't eat the turtles he caught and died
if it were me I'd've eated him
no shame
you gotta do what you gotta do to survive
another professor is working on brain cells
he wants the cops out
1 dr is a criopple and another has 1 eye
they work on astronomy
and moon effects
like in dbz how saiyans turn oozaru when the see moonlight
in the 70s they made blacula and blackenstein
why not a black werewolf?
in the 70s it could work
maybe a guy changes race in certain light
that sounds like a cool 90s toy
except with light instead of water
faye spots the reporter and calls him out for being up on a fire exit
he makes bad excuses
btw faywe wray is ms xavior
like Charles xavior in x men
the institute is his
all we nee is mutants
to bad lon chaney bit it
he's more fd than the x men
phantom of the opera
hunchback of notre dame
so the cops say in 48 hours they gon be back or something
a mutant comes after the reporter but runs away when his cop cigarete pops as its a joke smoke
just like something outta tim burton
the next day the reporter is back to get a photyo of dr xavior
he gets the maid (a new Yorker) and flirts with her
he joy buzzers her and she has fun
when he gets in he looks around and swipes a photo of faye
but she walks in
she calls him out on it but he sweet talks his way outta it
he comes out about being a reporter and she gets p'd at him for the story he made about her dad
he tries to joy buzzer her but shes too p-ssed to give a sh-t
as he leaves the new Yorker dumps water on him
I assume its amniotic fluid and someone is gonna poop out a baby
that night the scientists talk over who might be the killer
one of em is it
this is at his home and he's gonna do an experiment
wtf its been 30 mins
that didn't feel like it
outside the reporter climbs a wall and looks in a window
the dr x experiment is gonna prove em innocent but may out the killer
the reporter stumbles his way inside and fumbles around like leslie neilson
or light buster keaton
he sees a skeleton but its being moved by a guy carrying it
this would make a cool video game
the new Yorker is nervous of the house
dr x is gonna have the new Yorker wear the clothe\s of the murder victim for the experiment
they r gonna reenact the icing
the reported plays with skeletons
are those real?
dr x feels that hidden thoughts can be brought out by heart things
sounds like a bad anime
the guys are clamped into and wired to chairs
then the moon comes out
1 guy starts freakin out
he has a moon fetish and is gonna get a b0ner!
since the killer has 2 hands the amputee is omited
meanwhile, the room the reporter is in had smoke pumped into it
I think its drugged
he's gonna get b0ned!
at the science x periment, the machine amplifies the heart beats and displays them on tubes
the dr sez that 1 of em had to cannibal so in his subconscious he will react from seeing it
and only dr x knows who's tube is who's
the one who's tube reaches the top 1st is the killer
he uses wax figures of the victims
1 was a druggie
then the new Yorker and they re\enact it
the lights go out and in the dark 1 tube fills up
the astronomer is it
but when they turn off the dark he's dead
the crippled guy can walk and the guy next to the killed guy says he didn't do it
the amputee sez he was knocked out
jinkies! what a mystery
imagine if Scooby doo solved murders?
with swearing and perversion and nude scenes and b0ning
they find the reoperter and hes out ciold
so they revive him
they don't want him outing the story to the public
he wants to but faye x wants to protect her dad
he sez he's gonna hold off if he can have breakfast with em
they are falling in love
the amputee interrupts em and has a room for him
like in the room with tommy wiseau
I already ordered a pizza
shouldn't the dr x call the cops?
a man was iced in his home
in the AM we see faye wray in her jammies
like with yuuko in valis 3
she finds her dad autopsying the iced scientist
if this were made today we'd see him poking in the open bod
after she leaves a guy sz to the dr x that the body has been...
but don't finish
I assume someone b0ned it
later on the reporter and the faye wray are on the beach and shes in a swimsuit
she is malcontent that she has to live where bad things happen
I assume the dr x has dark experiments
this IS new york
the new Yorker is too freaked out from the experiment and has a bad vibe
so the faye wray is gonna do it
her charactwers name is joan
joan "crawl up my a55" crawlford?!
a guy walks aropund in the dark and his flashlight goes out
then he falls through a secret thing and is in a room
the new Yorker reads her tea leaves as I new York they do the occult
its a skull and cross bones
someones gonna get b0ned in the skull and get cross (mad)
the dr x gets the cops to give him until midknight to catch the perp
what if hes not 1 of em>?
at the night he redoes the x periment
this kinda reminds me of the thing
one of em is a killer and they don't know who they can trust so they have a blood test
the faye wray is worried of dr x's health as he's working hard
my grampa worked hard all his life
he had big a55 Slovenian man hands from farm work
he made it to 94.5
he's like the Castlevania guys
1 dr askes if letting the amputee be free is good
the dr x sez he has the doors bolted
as the moon rises 1 guy starts breathing loud
he's gonna start j-ckin off!
meanwhile, the amputee gets a hand made of synthetic flesh attached to his stump and electirfied
it comes to life
he then starts adding mushy synthetic flesh to his face and head and covers his hair
he becomes the monster from b4
cool effects btw
btw with his hair covered he its like propfessuer x from x men
but he gets his hair out
well that came from no where
he uses secret passages and iced the butler who was gonna play the killer in the x periment
faye wray is playing the victim and the real killer is coming in
everypne freaks out and the killer reveal hes the amputee
everypne struggles being chained up
in Africa the amputee got flesh samples to work with
he killed people to get samples
hes doing it for science!
the reporter fights the killer an gets his a55 kicked
kick him in the parts!!
the faye wray frees the drs
the reporter fight the kiler and nails him with a fire lamp
then pushes him out the window
as he don't se his corpse hes probably not dead
wait, we see his burning bod on the ground below
the reporter tells his story on the phone giving the dr x credit
then a shadow of the killer comes out
but its the faye wray
he sez he used the joy buzzer to catch the killer's ticklish spot
that's cool
the lights go out and he joy buzzes the faye wray and they b0ne
the end
that was cool
I love early 30s cr-p
plus this predates x men by a good 30+ years
sorta like the bat whispers and batman
this was sorta tim burton batman a bit
for dr x 2 I'd like for it to be in the 50s and after the war the synthetic flesh is used to help the amputees from the war. but theres a side effect that causes the users to gradually go insane and start eating people after its been in them for too long. so the bada55 80s style tough chick daughter of the reporter and the faye wray has to fight them off and use her grandfathers sci fi 50s style weapons to fight off the demented ex amputees and save her 50s guy boy friend from being eaten. also she's kind of a bimbo and bad a55 at the same time and has jean harlow blonde hair and dresses like its the 1980s

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