The Phantom Of The Opera Review

Note: I spell better than the frenchies

The Phantom Of The Opera

This sis my review on The Phantom Of The Opera from  the duistant future yeart top george armstrong custer opf 1025 (100 years before Transformers Victory)

its directed by Rupert Julian who diid nothing i saw

it styares Lon Chaney from The Unholy Three (both versions)/West of Zanzibar/Laugh, Clown, Laugh/Mockery/The Unknown/Mr. Wu/The Blackbird//The Monster/He Who Gets Slapped/The Hunchback of Notre Dame/The Shock/Oliver Twist/Flesh and Blood/The Ace of Hearts/The Penalty/The Wicked Darling/Outside The Law\ The False Faces, Mary Philbin from The Man Who Laughs, Norman Kerry from The Hunchback of Notre Dame\The Unknown, Arthur Edmund Carewe from The Ten Commandments\The Cat and the Canary\Uncle Tom's Cabin, Gibson Gowland from The Birth of a Nation\Greed\Don Juan\The Mysterious Island, John St. Polis from The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse\The Unknown, Snitz Edwards ffrom The Thief of Bag dad, Virginia Pearson from the 20s wizard of oz, Bernard Siegel from Laugh, Clown, Laugh, Ruth Clifford from The Snake Pit\Sunset Boulevard\he Quiet Man\The Searchers, George Davis from Sherlock Jr.\He Who Gets Slapped\The Circus, Cesare Gravina from The Penalty\The Hunchback of Notre Dame\Greed\The Trail of '98\The Man Who Laugh, s, William J. Humphrey from The Unholy Three, Carla Laemmle from Uncle Tom's Cabin\ the 30s Dracula, John Miljan from The Unchastened Woman\The Jazz Singer\the 30s The Unholy Three\Arsène Lupin\I Accuse My Parents\Samson and Delilah\the 50s The Ten Commandments, Rolfe Sedan from The Conquering Power\Bardelys the Magnificent\Flesh and the DevilUncle Tom's CabinA Tale of Two Cities\The Wizard of Oz\Gentlemen Prefer Blondes\Young Frankenstein, ands a buncha guys not on soviiert back door camdy a55 wikipedia

i saw this b4 and its one of the besat of Lon Chaney

It follows the book closer thanb any other versions and the book was by Gaston Leroux who based in on actual events of some dude living in an opera house or something

This isd reviewed on my 100 greatest ter rer classics dbd box set so its public domain the version

after credits and title this guycomes by holding a lanternin a darkll cavbe andthis guy in a zorro hat';s shadow comes by

its also in proper fullscrteen and b/w

lanter says something w/o audio and leacvers and the phantom shadow returns

text sez the paruis opera house is abode a midieval torture chamber cuz the french are like tyhe marquis de sade

we see the opera room and its a tall curtain like king kong that would be ruyyined if croppedfor widerscreen

the opera has chicks doing ballet for a while and in the ex4cutive office a deal is made by guys in capes to buy the opera house but are told its haunted by the phantom of the opera

whho am i? I'm spider man!

I wanna take his face... off!

fancy shooting son, whats ur name? Murphy!\

so they laugh but are told its srs, and unlike ggloball warming, real

also theres box 5 which has a cloaked guy wjho hided his face and dont talkand the cleaning slave tells em not to f with him

the owners of b0ners come in and see a guy thwere from behind and run out

they go back in and the room is empty like hes a ninja or batm,an or ninja baseball bat man

after da play this guy sees a blicketee black cat comming down da stairs anfdthe dancers in the prop placxe see the shadow of the phantom and run

they tell a frooty guy he had no nose but the guy sez the nose was huge which probablty meansd hes got sa big d0ng

a gaijin looking guy co,mes by aand they think it might ber the phanbtom and bring frooty guyto ask him

they come across this guy with a  fake head who sez the phantom has a skull like yellow face w/o a nose, like grimskull in skeklleton warriors?

m,YBE LIKE sosuke Osahiba in Violence jack

this head guy beings em to see the place he saw the phantom and it was a quick shadow he saw (which proves nothing! it could be a wind on a lamp)

frooty booty sees something and freajksas out and they all run

the mom of carlotta wjhhos the head dancer is p-ssed trhat her kid isnt gonna be the lead in sswan lake cuz she got a note from the phantomn sayiong tyo use christine

is this like with honeyy boo boo?

on play night carlotta, or carl like carl macek of robotechj,  was sick so christine sings the part

thgis obviously german dude played by norman kerry has the hots for christine and his brother sez the phantom is after her

i hes a ghost and they b0ne is it naecrophilia?

so in the play this blonde goes up with this angel and is this dantes inferno? i thought it was swan lake

so raoul or raoh in hokuot no ken dont care about the rumors of the phantom hurricane dragooon and smooches the christine, but not the car in thre soviet steven king movie

raoh wants to marry her and she sez she cant leave the opera and to forget her

he gives her the back hand and starts takjing off hsi clothes as she lies dead and head bleeding from the impact on the floor

jk relly he goes and phjanton talks from within the walls and sez he gave her the world and all of soviet paris will worship her, but she must forget her life and be his slave

so is this like being in a union? like the film actors guild saying who and what you can say and do?

later the carl mom gives a note fgrom phantom to opera head  saying to fake ilness or something bad will happen

this it tear ur is em, like the malcontents thrfeatening to torch the town if a cop isnt punished for doing his job

so the phantom sent anpther note sayhing not to put carl as the star

the carl goes on adn its faust btw that the playt is and raoh talks with some chick

he gets a note from christine saying not to see her again

so the play goes on and the lights spazz out and the main chandelier falls in a well done shot

so he didn';'t like an acrot playing a role he wanted for someone else and caused damage?

hes like those monkeys who whine when there's not enought not white and non straights and not men in things

so the people scatter like roaches when you turn on the lights, whcih makes sense as they are frenchies, and i think a few got sqwuasxhed

the gaijijn is there and raoph looks around and goes in christinas dressing room

he hides ands the christian comes in and phantom hurricane attack sez he came for her aND tells her to go into the mirror

raoh sees her enter the opening and closing mirror and didnt get in and she sees this back area with gears and cr-p

is this whole place a transformer like autobot cuty or metroplex?

this hand of this ghuy in a creepy mask meets her and shes freaked out but he sez hes her master and is he wearing a 40s detective hat?

he sez hes devoted to her and leads her down this rstaircase like in robin hood from the 30s and puts her on a big black horse and they go through the undreground area

what if thre htose cr-ps? people would smell it, and theres no sun so it would be moist and damp

they stop at this boat in this undergreound black lake like having a forrest in a flying dungron in video games

after a trip in the boppat, whats lighting this place? its undertground, so they go to his lair and shes creaped out by him but he smells her dress like the Chief Hwad Irish Man Prez and sez shes  500 cellers undertground cuz he loves her

he wants her goodness to bring out his goodness and shes freaking out after going with this stranger toi his room and will probably be b0ned dead

shes spazzing out and his face looks like handsome squyyidward and he reveals he sleeps in a coffin

she srealizes hes the phantom, and he sez hes is cuz men hating him made him and he needs her love to redeem him

his name is erik like Eric Carl, from The Very Huingary Caterpillar and there Carlotta so it fits

she blacks out and he tajkes ehr to a bedtrom and hod he get all this cr-p in here? is it like the joker and his always having money for cr-p?

the papers tell of the singer missing after the chandelier fell and thinking its the phantom and she has f';d dreams  and wakes up to find fancy shoews that women hve a fetish for but guys liking feet is wqeird

also is phancy Dresses and finds a not saying to never touch his mask and she'd be happy

Is this like the Tree of Knolwegde oif Good and Evil in The Bible? AKA The WISDOM TREE?!?!?!

so she sees him playing a piano and its don juan triumphant and erik sez he has triumphant love

like a f--kin dumba55 she pulls off his mask w/o consent or woc andholy f he;s devolved!

its a fright! he;s got an ape face and hisn shock rings out

great make up byy chaney

he gets mad at herr and popints and grabs her and laughs AND SEZ TO GET A LOT him

man hes a mutant, makes the xc men look normal, and not only the hot ones

shge ses "if u really love me, let me leabve and i';ll be ur slave" and erik sez he will let her sing opera again but if she sees raoh he'd ice em bnoth

imagine if they had kids and the kid was devolved like him?

so phantom clutheces his chest which makes sense in the real version and she swears not to see her butt buddy again

then the very next scene is a note to raoh saying "i said i wouldnt but i gotta see you agian"

then its the masked ball and peole do french halloween where they dont worry iof class and wear masks and have fun and probably b0ne each others butts

thsi scene is in 2 strip technicolor and is pretty good but in thius public doimain dvd its faded like a comic book

kinda gives it some class though

so she and raoh i think go up and this guy in a red robe with a skull maskand scepter comes in

a skull face with a skull mask? like sosuke oshiba in violence jack?

so he sez below them are tortutred tombs and the red death remembers

is this a thing on edgar wallen poe and masque of the red death?

the heroes go on teh roof like its a high school anime and theres a statue of angels thats pretty big and looks great but in widescvreen they;'d chop half of it off

they think its safe to talk but like the gov and maruta listening in on our phones and comps, the phantom is listening

she tells him of the phantom aand its b/w again and asks huim to save her from his gross a55

she wants himn to take her away after performing in Faust and he sez they;'d flee to back door soviet england like the scarlet pimpernell

he kisses her head and phantom spazzes out all abominous at her betrayal

i mean, yea, she broike her word all cuz ur gross, thats kinda mean

althoguh eh dsoes kill people

is this like hokuto no ken with shin and Yuria?

the phantom jumps down and slu=gs him off the roof as he falls and slams into the hground, then bites her neck and kills her

jk really he stands there with his cape in the wind like batman an d watches em making out kinda

does that statue have t-ts?  or is it a guy?

the gaijin sees am and tells em what way to go and trhgey do so

the phantom coems down and p-sses off a rude frenchie and when he realized it wad the phantom the frooty guy whos also rude blacks out

then we get note ssaying erik was born during the boule ard massacre and is selfd taught muscian and master of black arts and exiled to devils island for crazuy's but escaped

gaijin is reading ti and tells opera owner erik is da phantom

at night the next day a cart came by and raoh wanted  to be ready to book it

christine is bummed and phantom told her he knows their plans and has a counter thing ready

the phantom sees the cart and sneaks around and she asks raoh to save her from the monster

thats abelist and body shaming

he comforts her and as the curtain risheres a body hanging from the upper thing and frooty booty sees it and greaks otu

cuz hes frewnch he might try to b0ne it

he sez the stranglers done it again but when he gets back the body is gone

they see a guy on the ground and hes in h e double french canada and its some guys brother who knerw too much of the phantom

theres a rope there and josephs brother but not benjamin of israel vows to avenge him

the phantom replaces these 2  beer bottles in teh light control area or w/e of the opera hoiuse and christine does the faust

in this put where this nerdy guy lurks hes dragged under and phantom comes in weariing his mask and blanche or w/e christinas nam si freakes out and ruins the play

in the control room the workers are drugged and no one casn find main chick

raoh sees the mirror amnd gaijin comes by and ses he can help him if he follows his instructuions

gaijin sez hes a frenchie in the secret police and wa sfollowing the phantom for nmopnths and kopens the mirror

a rewference to the inner dark world being the reverse of our world

also used iin yugioh gx with the worlds being the front and back of a card

gaihin sez this secret area was where erik was kept in the 2nd revolution and has raoh keep 1  hand up to keep off nooses

so some guy comes in after the gaijin and raoh

the dynamic duo get to a trap door that cost joseph his life for discovering it

they go in and ther lantern guy comes by saying turn back or die and hes a messenger of shadows like a yugioh card

in his lair the phantom b-0-ches at her for betraying him after he made her a star and vpows in a  wordy monologue about his cr-ppy feeliongs

gaijin and raoph come into an area and fall in a trap door like in a video game or castlevanai dracula x or the cyber shinobi and its a torture chamber of mirrors

phantom dont wanna be f'd outta his chance to get the giorl and a level goes off and on showing the phantom he has unexpected guests

is this like the batcave in batman?

so the guy comming in after em was raohs brother and raoh goes off i weman the phantom goes off to end him by uising a long wood straw as a snorkeland walking in the water

raoh calls to chjristine and she hears him and as raohs brother not rapohcomes by in a boat, phantom goes to hius boat and pullsd it over and ends him

raoh calls to christine to open the door to them  and she f';sd wioth things and rapoh wants to know where the keys are

eirk comes back and is in his mask and hat and plays piano

somehow joes brother found the phantoms hiding place and it never says how and wants to avenge him

christine tajes the keyes and phantom catches her and takes em back

raoh gets b--chy and erik hears him and sees em in his hole in the walls a55 and f';d wioth the lights

the light make highh heat and are cooking em as i think phantom is gonna eat em, or would if this were riki-oh

she looks in and sees raoh undressing and theres a noose by em and she spooazzes out

the angry mob is comming for him and eirk laughs and asks what she'd offer for their lives

she getsa a face full of his ugly mug and recoils but gaijin finds something by digging in the sand floor

its a trap door and they sneak in as phantom watches them get to a cellar with barrels of wine or meth

wait its gunpowder and the way out is blocked by metal bars and they cant get out

thwe erik offer her a chance to be his woman or her butt buddy gets it, like with Shin and Yuria in gokuto no ken

theres 2 knobs, a scorpion that saves him and a grasshopppper that blows the opera house and she has to chosse

she reaches for the grasshopper to kill everyone cuz shes french but prays or something and turns the scorpion really ret-rded;ly

this makes the water in the lake flow in their room and they'd f--ked nbow

the angry mob is comming and she ses she'd do anythign to save em(which includes mouth stuff) and phantom shows the floor that opens to show the guys in the water and they get out from erik pulling on em like pulling on a b0ner to stretch it out

she cuddles weith the handsome norman kerry real name arnold kaiser as hes german and bada55 and not a ceviolved frenchie and phantom sees the angry mob comming for himn

in the book he dies of a broken heart here or .w/e abnd iuin the movie they filmed iut but thoguht it wasnt actionyy enough

so erik nabs her and runs off and the mob gets there as wrik see a window behind a cuirtain

the monb mistakes raoh as the phantom and beats hi  dead

jk really phantom gets awy in the cart horse thing and wwith that smnile looks like the man who laughs

somehow the mob and raoh come out and chase him and somehow catch up to a horse powered thing at high speed

wait, she jumps out and he totals it and they catch up and he runs

rapoh gets his woman and the mob catches chany laybert and he pulls somethign outta his shitt and is gonna tthrow it

he laughs and revalas hes got jack sgh-t and they beat him dead and throw his corpse in the river

i think 1 guy used a hammer

the end

that was quite good

a bit long but it doesnt feel it

its got good acting and writing and the effects are cool

its kinda one of the universal mnsters series with thsi devolved guy being the titler character and bad guy

in the book i hear he let her go with her bg and bit it but here he goes mental

lon chaney does a great job in here and the direction was well done

its one of his better roles, but i kinda liked the unknown more

he's not evil evil, he's just a malcontent who wants a girl and is mutated

it inspired many films later and has a good feeling where its not much going on but holds your attention

kinda liek alien 001

this si probably the best version of it andf it was closer to the book than the others and while no one remembers the mask, everyone remembers the face

he;s reallky a freak, makes chairface chippendale look normal

but i liked it and as usual, normak kerry got the girl

for The Phantom Of The Opera 2 i want him to have been dying in the river and his black magic kicked in and he revived as a demon monster and attacked the townsfolkwith his devolvd claws and blades in his body. also raoul and her unite their love and become a hermaphrodite of fusing into a metaslic thing and  fight the demon phantom in an epic battle across the city. Afetr beating him, he space folds top h-ll and will be back with more daemons, so  thhe defuseable and reufsable couple go aroudn to find these  holy places to pray and summon angel warriors to fight agaisnt the demon ones, then its a big battle where 1 angel faces 1 demon until the winner gfets paris. also its a 128 bit 3d fighting game like soul calibur but on sega dreamcast, gamecube, ps2 and xbox where you play as either angels or demons and fight in a rouunament.