Brannigan Review

Notw: My kepboard s bad but i spell woth a zap

Brannigan

This is my review on Brannigan fron th distant future year to Amercan Hero John Wilkes Booth of 1975(50 years before Transformers Vctoey)

Its directed by Douglas Hickox who did The Giant Behemoth which kinda s-cked

It stars Elite Alpha Male John Wayne from Bardelys the Magnificent\the 28 Noah's Ark\the 30s The Three Musketeers\Blue Steel\Stagecoach\Angel and the Badman\Red River\Fort Apache\The Quiet Man\\Hondo\The Searchers\The Alamo\The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance\How the West Was Won\McLintock!\The Greatest Story Ever Told\The Green Berets\Chisum\Big Jake\Cahill U.S. Marshal\Star Wars the 77 one/The Lucky Texan/True Grit, Richard Attenborough from A Matter of Life and Death/Brighton Rock/The Great Escape/A Bridge Too Far/Jurassic Park/1994 Miracle on 34th Street/The Lost World: Jurassic Park/Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat/Jurassic World, Judy Geeson from 60s Berserk!/Inseminoid/The Plague Dogs/Mad About You/Touched by an Angel, Mel Ferrer from 50s Scaramouche/The Sun Also Rises, John Vernon from The Outlaw Josey Wales/National Lampoon's Animal House/Airplane II: The Sequel/Ernest Goes to Camp/-Killer Klowns from Outer Space/Heavy Metal/Batman: Mystery of the Batwoman/Batman: The Animated Series/jim Hensons Dinosaurs/90s Fantastic Four/Pinky and the Brain/Mortal Kombat: Defenders of the Realm/Spider-Man: The Animated Series/Duckman/90s The Incredible Hulk/Pinky, Elmyra & the Brain, Daniel Pilon from Left Behind, Ralph Meeker from The Dirty Dozen and Millard Mitchell from The Day the Earth Stood Still/The Naked Spur, Lesley-Anne Down from Countess Dracula/Night Trap/Death Wish V: The Face of Death/The Nanny/A Family of Cops, Sodomus Barry Dennen from Fiddler on the Roof/Jesus Christ Superstar/The Shining/Trading Places/Superman III/Titanic/Heavenly Sword/60s Batman/Batman: The Animated Series/Animaniacs/Batman Beyond/non anime Avatar: The Last Airbender/The Dark Crystal, John Stride frpm The Omen 1, James Booth(Not John Wilkes) from Zulu/Airport '77, Arthur Batanides from The Ten Commandments/Spartacus/60s The Twilight Zone/The Dick Van Dyke Show/Star Trek/Happy Days, Kathryn Leigh Scott from 70s The Great Gatsby/70s The Incredible Hulk/Little House on the Prairie/The A-Team/Star Trek: The Next Generation/The Goldbergs, Brian Glover from Alien 3, Don Henderson from The Ghoul/Star Wars/Red Dwarf, Tony Robinson from Blackadder (blicketee black), Tony Booth from nothin I saw, ad a fw guys i aint seen in anything but are on back door, aids bag, sopdom, bottom, gender offender, Creator hater, frooty booty, sbanams crammer queer as a deer with a steer in its rear, hippie stoner vegan peta tree kung fu based on plants Wikipedia, which calls Acupuncture a pseudoscience but thinks eps teen iced himself

I never saw this b4but its got John Wayne so its probably good.

Its sometimes called Joe Battle according to bac door, aids bag, gender offender, Sodom bottom, frooty booty, queer as a deer with a steer in its rear, Creator Hater, banana crammer, hippie stoner egan peta tree kung fu base on plants Wikipedia who thinks blood type diets dont work but guys can turn chick.

after logoes we get tile and credits in widescreen and 70s color wit close ups of a bada55 gun and p0rn0 music

we see a ner printing money and own wayne kicks the door in and sez nock nock and grills him for where this guy the grand jury indicted is

he's told the guy split town an john wayne puts this gun in plastic he threatene him with down so nerd pulls it on him but is not loaded

ohn wayne ties him up an the ner sez theres a bounty on him an he's dead and he walks off and leaves him for the cops

as john waybe booth walks to his car the cops bring him back and have someone get his car and they drive to more credits

Christopher Trumbo? lie the commie Dalton Trumbo?

they go to the air port and lt is sening john wayne to soviet England to bring back the guy he was hunting

the brits talk of them sending jim brannigan and john Vernon aka Rupert thorne in batman 90s not damin thtone from the omen is the bad guy i think and is told the DA can't touch him here

i think he puts a hit on brannigan john wayne and brannigan arrives from half cibilizied Chicago to devolved England and a guy i think a hitman is there

a female cop blone meets brannigan and sez sir Charles ishandling his eturn trip and other cr-p and shes his assistant to look out for him as a p r job

the hitman watches and bad guy and his roog say things are going on and go to the pool or bath house

brannigan wants sleep and is driven by blonde who sez the 3 things wrong with Americans are over paid over s=xe and over here

brannihan calls blone ginny like the harry pooter charater and sez she loaned him money and was a good friend but blonde worries they were b0ning

we see throne in the pool swimming naked and we see his a55 like on sponebo and the simpsons then we see him being scrubbed and massauged

the massauger is beat out and guys use chemicals on a rag to ko throne and slip him in a yellow plastic thing to kidnap him

blone drops off brannigan to a mens club to see sir Charles and has him wear a tie

he meets the geezer from Jurassic park an want a Polish Drink and talks of how bad guy go away cuz of bail

sir chairld Jurassic park guy sez he got sir from an ancestor and wants breakfast as thats his timezone thing and Charles wants him not to have a gun as England prefers being knifed by gaijin

Brannigan sez he's working under Chicago andbrit geezr Charles sez dont use it but goes off and returns wanting the Polish beer and sez the bad guy was kidnappe

in a big black car the hitman comes to waste brannigan and stops by a place saying private tuition in French which lie englan ins't American

he gets a letter from a frooty guy from Chicago and sez half now half when the job is done

htman sez its light and frooty guy lets htiyman have a woman there who i th is a h--ker and he strangles her as he's into that

Charles who is chuck and might be f--ked or butt f--k sez the massauger is beat out and brannigan thiks they otta go out paying for info lie modern cop work while chuck the butt f--k cu-k whines of America's murder rate and whines of his gun

blone drives brannigan around and black car hitman comes after john wayne from behind li many English men want to do to Americans but relly have done to them by gaijin

at night hitman is by brannigans place and blonde leaves then drives off loudly in his cr-pmobile

brannigan drinks as hes an irish and the next day we get a recording from bad guy saying pay this much money in piccadilly circus and no cops

the lawyer for bad guy gave it to the cops an brnnigan questions it but chuck the s=ck sez they voiceprinted it and its him

brannigan sez theyd be paying it from money from h--kers and we see this times square lie place withthe lawyer there and brannigan andblonde in a car near

bad guy sez he smells brannigan an we see awyer drive across London bridge and slides packages into a red mail thing insome place

soon the mail man comes up as theres protesters against something going by and the mail man gets the mail

brnnigan thinks its too simple and follows em mail main brings it to the post office and blonde watches where it went

a mototcycle guy comes inand gets some packages and leaves as brannigan follows and theres no fialogue like a silent film

the guythrows th package in the water and brannigan throws the bike nerd in but finds th packages had newspaper in em

the mailbox was tampered with and had a plug in the butt that let em change packages from the sewer lie the ninja turtles and get away

john waybe return t hs pararment and ntuces somethings up and we see behind the door is a shotgun ready to go off

the barrel behind the door

h checks with a lay and finds a guy was there and he kicks in the door from the bottom at an angle and it goes off missing him

he then gets the shower line to pull the toilet flusheer with the door closed and it blows

brannigan has dinner with blonde an looks into thins to find this guy blonde sez is a stoolie is part of it

brannigan sez a while ago his rookie partner got his head blown off by a crook after brannigan but brannigan hated him but it was his on to keep him alie teil he could handle it and f'd up

chuck the butt suck f--k calls em in and sez something i wasn paying attention to, i think the paper reported on them

branigangoes to see the guy who pulls a knife on him when brannigan gets hard butn brannigan kicks his legs out and beats him down then is gonna bust the guys teeth on the desk til he tells the next guy to go after

brannigan; unless u anna go for englans free dental care

me; but their teeth are rotting and devolved

Also me: What if an englishman sucked yo d0ng and his rotting teeth touched your pee ness and it rotted?

brannigan goes after th next guy later an in a bar or something and a dispute with chuck leade to puncheing and it quickly devolves into a bar brawl

a guy for the cops gets info on a guy with access to sewers under piccadilly curcus

they grill the h--ker who was strangled by hitan over giving hm the sewer maps or w/e and she sez she gave them to her bf freddywho i thought was queer

brannigan grills a drunk and put a teapot on the stove then checks the draer drunk didn't want him to see

he gets back and find drunk wih a bullet in his back and goes after the guy by commandeering a car and driving on the wrong side of the road

In Transformers Animated Ultra Magnus comes to Earth and drives around with Optimus who says "Here on Earth we drive on the Right side of the street" Me: Take DAT England! You ain't Urth!!

the car gets f;d up in the chase and jumping a bridge opening as the candya55 brit spazzes out

chuck not uncle chuck from sonic grills a guy and finds the guy he sold the plans to and brannigan sez its the guy who iced drunk

at night himan is by brannigans place and gets his gun and slencer which i think the movie will say makesit make no sound like a ninja magic

blonde goes to the car to get the notebook and hitman goes to ice her so in slo mo brannigan gets his gun and fires on him as he drives off

chick blonde is ok but get hat got hit and the next day chuck b--ches of brannigan using a gun and blames him een thoughhe saved the chick

brannigan gets a call saying a guy bought a lot of shares for 49 and sold em for 3 and hes got a gift for chucko f--ko sucko

lawyer is gonna pay the randsome and brannigan/chck say not to pay or they get bac him in chunks

a message comes in saying to contact him and tell lawyer to come soon and alone but lawyer se the bank needs 4 or 5 hours and bad guy sez bring it and they get a few more hours

lawyer sez to have chuc swan aka mr swan lik mr swan in mad tv not to have servailence and they find a homing evice on his car the cops put on

after some driving for a while, lawyer goes to an ol facory as the final battle has to be in a factory andbad guy wns to be let go

hes in cuffs andlawyer pulls a gun on him and sez never trust aybo and caps the 2 guys there thenlaughs with bad guy after pulling it off

they cut off his ring finger as a radsome thing and now they got 1 million dollars and an are gonna go to butt f--k south America with the cannibals andcrooks

then a homin device falls outta the money and brannigan busts in saying noc knock and would blow off his parts if he moves

they arrest the lawyer and bad guy but the hitman is comming and tries to run branniga over

Europe having killers from oher lands attacking people in cars? too soon!

so after a few drive bys tthe hitman gets a gun an i think misses him so he tries running him over

branigan gets is gun and puts a few bullets in him so he drives off a thing and the car blows for no reason

brannian sez bye to blonde and goes back to The 1st World as 70s music plays looing a the bridge then credits

the end

That was pretty cool

Good ohn Wayne being manly and American

A lot like a Western but like a 70s cop thing like the beastie boys sabotage video

Waybe was fun andthe other actors did well

I like how Vernon used his ripert thorne voice from 90s batman as this crime guy

good fipming and it had nice slo mo and good action

much is build up and a goo burst of action instead of non stop macbine gun of cr-p like modern things

i liked it and its pretty cool

a later john wayne ilm but like dirty harry bt John Wayne still has honor and skill

Glad I saw this

And its no Zap Brannigan frm Futurama

For Brannigan 2 I want them to take the jet across the sea but the bad guy gets out and makes a fuss and the plane goes down on an uncharted island in the Atlantic. There's ancient beasts there and John Wane and the bad guy gotta team up to get out and get to shore. Also its a 16 bit beat em up on Sega Genesis, Snes, TG16, Atari Jaguar and GBA where 1 player is John Waye abd the other is Vernon and you beat up pygmy mammoth and Smilodon an glyptodon and wooly rhino and other things til you fight a sasquatch at the end as the boss and he has magic.