Tuesday, November 27, 2018

Cult Of The Cobra Review

note; I spell cult film style
cult of the cobra
this is my rfewvuiew on cult of the cobra from 55
I never saw it b4 but by texas friend greg said I otta do it
i'm doing it now as I was looking through my emails and saw one from him hat suggested it and it reminded me
its by universal who was known for their monster films in the 20s-50s
it stars faith domergue and richard long who was in the twilight zone
after credits to exciting music we get text saying something about reality and illusion and the mind
is this sonic forces?
also its the distant future year of 1945 and set in asia
around when and where go nagai was born
also aisa is a big place. cant they specify more?
so in this market place these soldiers wanna buy cr-p and chat with a snake charmer
they pay him to take out his cobra to get a photo of it
one soldier mentions a cult of snake lovers called lamians who turn chicks into snakes
and he wants to see it
charmer tells em its real and sez he's in the cult
he sh as I guess this cult need you to pay to belong
he'd bring em to a cult meeting tonight for 100 American dollars
that's a lot of money in the 40s
and more in the 3rd world
no outsiders ever saw it and I a risk to charmer
they give him 10$ EACH And will meet at 10 pm
later they're in a bar/café they wonder if its real and 1 guy sez people believed in transformation for thousands of years
like werewolves and vampires
good plug for ur past films universal
later they go there in cloaks and charmer sez if theyre caught the cult will ice em with snake assassins
at the cult a guy does a spinny dance with a bowl and fights a swordman
then snakes come out but its really some bendy chicks arms
she crawls out of a pot and wiggles on da floor and onto a guy as they do gymnastics
hes bit and she crawls back to her pot
1 dumba66 takes a flash photo and everyone sees and they fight
I think charmer gets iced and the army guys book it as the place burns from a torch hitting a cloth
they drive but one of em aint there
they find him on da road with a chick running from him and 1 guy follows but cant find her
road guy got bit on da neck by a snake
this just turned into final destination and the crow
road guy had tried to jack the pot the snake chick was in to get the wiggley chick
they get road guy patched up and he's ok
road guy is in the med unit and theres a storm
at night a cr-ppy cobra puppet goes into his room and ices him as he screams
later ne of his homies wonders how he bit it as the poison was neutralized
but hes gotta fly out in 5 mins
then why is he in the hospital?!
is the airport to it?
dr sez the only way he could bite it is if a snake came in on purpose
on ride they wonder if its the cult that caused it
they talk about their plans back home
1 guy named rico like in star ship troopers has a boweling alley and invites his friends
at the alley this blonde sez to 1 guy she wants to marry another guy
later one of the guys is at home and this lady in his building screams
he chex on her and sez a man was after her but she didn't see him
he chex and theres no one
he wants to call da cops but she don't want it
good sign shes the bad guy
she sez she's new and they chat
he offers to show her around town and they grow closer
shes named lisa like that tommy Wiseau 5kank or the chick from Robotech
next day they go out and he shows her soviet new York
at night they go home and smooch with consent
he shows lisa to his room mate and the dog don't like her
dogs hate me too
gotta cool ur ki to have them not react
he shows lisa his war homies
she sez she down bowl smoke or drink
like weird al yankovic
she goes back to her place and he chex on her one more time
then he chats with his roommate played by long about how shes not like other gurls
she goes out and street cats fear her
she goes to the boweling alley which is now closed for da night
as rico goes out hes touched on the back but its just some lady
this is just like final destination how they jerk you around with fake outs
later hes driving and something gets him from behind and he crashes
lisa walks away
after the service for him they wonder about the cult icing 2 of em
sounds like you otta see a priest
as they walk a horse and lisa scare eachother
later at a party 1 guy dances and chats with lisa and her bf slugs him out and books it
long is in a cab and smooches the girl who chose him over the other guy and he wonders about the lisa
he tells his gf about the cult and sez he senses lisa is connected
bf and lisa return to his place and dog is scared
if that dog were my kid, i'd sell him to the monkey house
dog; dad dee! help! the monkeys are eating me!
me; that's what you get! for being a dog! ahahahahahahhaha!
lisa asks if bf was in love with longs gf
he sez he was but now he's over her
after chatting of it for a while about their feelings they smooch with consent
but she has to go
i assume she wants to stay a virgin
well, this IS a horror movie
he brings her glove she left at his place back but she don't respond
so he uses his key and goes in w/o consent
in her place the window is open
she shows up at another guys place
oh its the party guy
she sez sorry for wrecking his party
he makes a drink but shes gone when he gets back
then something wacks him
then it turns out he jumped outta the window and splattered on da sidewalk
the cops take his room mate away for questioning and later lisa returns as her bf fell asleep smoking
good way to get cooked
they talk about her knowing something her whole life and now feeling its wrong
he tries to help her
she loves him but dont wanna harm him
what is this? reverse twilight?!
next day bf and long eat breakfast together
nowadays there would be sodomis references
but in the 50s no one was queer
longs gf comes in and da cops call on da phone and wanna see long and bf
so cops ask a room mate a question on when something in the apartment got busted and let him go
later lisa meets longs gf and its revealed long researched cults like the cobra one
they wrote a book in the 40s about this one cult no one outside saw b4?
lisa goes mental and is gonna do something but the delivery guy brings shirts and gf gotta go
meanwhile da cops grill bf about punching out the jumped guy
long is there too
he cops let em go and long tells em about the cult doing it
and lisa is the assassin
bf storms out and long tells the cops the whole thing offscreen
also; how did lisa get to America?
she was in whatever in asia
later bf confronts lisa about whacking his homies
he knows cuz she has a cut on her arm
and wants her to take a blood test to match the blood at the jumped guys apartment
she sez she against a spiked fence
he gives her a chance to prove her story and she goes into a room and we see her shadow turn into a cobra
then she comes out in a dress that would be sexy in the 40s but now 5kanks wear less to anime cons
it was another guy she turned into a cobra against
not her bf
she chats wth her bf and makes out
then long gets the lab report that the guys bit it from snake venom from cobra
later lisa and bf go to longs gf's show
the cops and the long find the guy lisa just iced  at her apartment
then long calls the theatre to get bf
long tells bf about the venim and iced guy at her place
lisa goes to longs gf's dressing room as lon races to save her
what is this? birth of a nation?
gf sees something and freaks out
bf comes in and sees a snake and wraps it in a blanket and beats on it with cr-p
then knocks it out of the building
long arrives in a cop car and the snake turns into the lisa
bf sees her and is bummed
then walks into the crowd and it sez the end
the end
that was pretty good
nice well paced not too long light horror film
no lust no swearing no gore no violence
good and clean like the 50s
good plot and I hear its a lot like cat people
I can see some similarities
this is more final destination or the crow
btu I liked it and thought it was well made
too bad its widescreen
good idea of an assassin falling in love with her target
and being forced to do so by black magic or w/e
sorta like with blacula but he just wanted his woman back but had to ice people
for cult of the cobra 2 I want the cobra cult to send another assassin after em and this time its 100 snake people that can fuse together to form a titaniboa from ancient times. also the surviving guys are more trained and have experimental nikola tesla lightning guns and power armor that lets them resist snake power. its also a 16 bit beat em up like alien storm on sega genesis, super Nintendo and Atari jaguar and you play as the 2 survivors from the 1st movie ho are now big and buff from training and have screen nukes and a limited electricity power to handle your super shots and nukes. you gotta take out all 100 snake assassins and after you do, their dust reforms into a titaniboa as the final boss

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