Monday, May 6, 2019

Mission Impossible Review

note; I never aw any of these movoies before plus i'm not a fan of tom cruoise so imma spell vad

mission impossible

this is my review on mission impossible from 1996

its baased on a 60s show I never watched

just like wild wild west

and was made into a big budget 90s movie with a big star and more action

just like wild wild west

and people complain how all movies nowadays are remakes of tv shows

cant wait for dat big budget Robotech movie

hope they don't screw it up

ewww its widescreen

hald da screen is black bars

so it starts in the soviet union where a guy watches video of some soviets being soviets

1 guy sez the name of a guy and they knock him out with poison vodka

turns out the soviet guy was tom cruise in a mask and he saves a drugged out girl in the room

then an opening with a fuse burning and high rapid edits

its by brian de palma and has jon Voight and ving rhames and vanessa redgrave

music by danny elfman?

make up by rob bottin?

but he was the thing!

so Voight gets a mesasage saying this thing of code names and a thing of real names are in danger

the code names are jacked but its useless w/o the real names list

and they gotta get it back

vpoight tells his teem including tom crooz about da mission and assigns jobs

if they don't get it back then their agents will get iced

also tom gets red/green gum that if u mush the colors together it blows

So they go to a dinner party and try to go after a confederate sounding governor

they have a guy chat with him and match his voice or fingerprint or something

wait

I think the confederate is one of them in disguise

they put glasses with a camera in em in a forbidden area to watch him use a computer

tom and a chick go to the roof to fake making out

1 tech guy on top of an elevator loses control of the elevator and gets skewered by the ceiling spikes like in mega man when it goes up

he aint gonna be in mission impossible 2

so Voight goes out but is tailed

he wants to end the mission but tom goes on

I never saw this b4 but I wanna say jon vought is the secret bad guy

lie that guy in that mega man x game

then Voight gets capped and falls in da river

tom calls da mission off and as the chic goes in her car it goes up

someones picking off costumed heroes

then another chick gets shanked and another guy gets it

tom flees the cops

tom calls his superiors and tells em his team got iced

also the other half of the code got out

tom meets him and is bummed

wait, that sounds wrong

he knows somethings up and only now knows there were agents all over the place

turns out; the whole mission was a hunt to find da mole

as one of their guys went bad

and as tom survive they think hes a mole

also his fam has money now after losing a lot

he uses the gum to blow an aquarium and escape in slo mo

he goes to a bathroom and apartment and does research

he finds a bible quote and uses it to send a message to a guy

they chat for a bit and later Voight comes back to him

but its really a chick who went up in da car

that made no sense

she sed she wasnt in the car

retcon!!

btw the group was sent on a suicide mission knowing only the bad guy would live

sacrificing the innocent? sounds like something done by soviet England

like Churchill letting leslie howard get iced

so tim wants to let the mole think hes got the other half so he'd find him

then tom gets a message from the guy

he meets some guys and is taken to a place with a face covering to meet the mole named max like high max from mega man x or max sterling from Robotech or montana max from tiny toons or mighty max

but he isn't allowed to meet him yet

he wants 150 000 $ and tells em the item they got is rigged to send a track to the forces if checked

they don't trust him and try it but book it when the forces come

oh and this female there is Maxine and wanted the mole to get it for 6 million $

he dals with her to let him meet mole and he'd gve her the list

also car chick who survived wants revenge on whoever iced vioght

Voight was her husband despite being 50 yeers polder than her

spo tom meets with ving rhames to have him hack the thing to get the names

you know, it would be better if we didn't know if tom was the mole and his actions were implied to b him being the bad guy

but we cant have tom cruise as the bad guy

except when hes b0ning brad pit into vampirism

so they go into this base and tom stops the frenchie from Godzilla from shanking a guy who asked where the 3rd guy of them was

chick puts fluid into a guys drink from a pen and puts a small item on his back

tom goes through da vents and uses gadgets to disable a laser grid and lower himself into the room on a cable

oh and Frenchie is handling his cable

poisoned guy goes to the vault and don't notice tommy above him as he takes some pills and barfs

they gave him aids!!

he leaves the barf in a bucket to stink up the area and goes to da terlet to barf more

tom logs into poisoned guys computer uses the guys code ving gave him

meanwhile a rat goes in da vents and disturbs Frenchie who drops tom who nearly hits the floor

what a candy a55

tom catches a drop of sweat from his glasses 

the Frenchie gets him out but his knife falls and poisoned guy comes back and sees the computer just dl'd the other part of the code

they escape and tom keeps the data from Frenchie

he don't trust the chick so he gives it to ving rhames

don't trust him!

esp after pulp fiction

then the news sez they caught tom but it was someone the6y called tom

also it was over drugs

wait, it was his fam

false charges against the innocent?

I think these guy are the bad guys

he hangs up just before they track his call but they know hes in soviet England

also jon Voight is back somehow

again

tom figures out jon voigt was the bad guy the whole time who iced everyone

oh and Frenchie was workin for him

huh, in each time they show the car going up it looks different

more or less fire

oh and this guy called Kittridge is the bad guy here

so on a train he let the Maxine get the disk list and it wont transmit cuz ving did something with it

ving laves and the datya starts transferring

also Kittridge is on da train and chick goes to this dark place with Voight

she tells Voight to blame tom and get away and voightb takes off his face and its tim

then real Voight comes out with a gun and its revealed tom knew Voight was da mole as he took the bible from the hotel and it was stamped

hen tom reveales he had the camera glasses out and their boss saw him alive

Voight beats down tom and when tom wakes up the roof is open

he goes up and theres a chopper after em and he crawls across da roof of da train like ernest evans on sega genesis/cd after jon voiht

they fight and the train and copper gos in a tunnel

the connection to transfer is dropped

btw a train I a tunnel with john Voight?

its speed 01 all over again

oh and Frenchie is in da chopper nd used the same knife in all his killings through the movie and tom hanks knew it

tom uses the boom gum and blows the chopper and lands safe on the train with a spike about to neck him

so things are settled and everything is set right

oh and the news covered up the chopper in the train as an accident

the end

that was ok

not bad

good action

but not too much

good suspence

good last minute things like him being caught at the last second b4 getting chopped up or w/e

I can see why so many things parodied it

I enjoyed it

no tacked on sad moment

no forced romance subplot

good effects

simple plot

its got good pacing and don't drag

not a bad film

glad I finally saw it after over 20 years

for mission imposible 2 I want him to have to assassinate a guy his bosses say s dangerous but he finds out the guy is the good guy about to expose the evils of his bosses. so tom sees why Voight turned on the group and sides with his target. but he doesn't let it be known by his bosses hes gone rogue and sneaks around setting up traps for when he's gotta take em all out in 1 move. its also a stealth game on gba, snes, sega genesis, Atari jaguar and tg16 where you play as tom and gotta plant traps w/o being seen and set up meetings with guys to have them in the right places.


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