Saturday, January 11, 2020

Little Lord Fauntleroy Review

note; i spell bad but that makes it more fun
little lord fauntleroy
this is my review on little lord fauntleroy from 1936
i never saw this b4 but its public domain
ooh, david o selznik did it
it stars Freddie Bartholomew from david copperfield and captains courageous and dolores barrymore who was drews ancestor
its directed by john cromwell who Anna and the King of Siam and Caged
its based on a book by Frances Hodgson Burnett who alsio did the secret garden
so its soviet new york brooklyn in the 1880s and this guy just bit it and his wife and kid try to manage
kid trys to be like robin hood and his mom as marion
is he gonna b0ne his mom?
so he gets an 1800s big wheel bike and goes around the hood talking to neighbors
a gang of kids bash him for his brit accent as his dad was a brit
they beat him up and his homie dick comes by and helps unbtil ann irish cip stop it
dick is a show shine boy and after kid chats with a guy named hobbs, this lady brings him home
this lawyer named havisham like that nasty old hag from great expectations is gonna take kid away as some lord ordered it
oh i think da lord is kids grandpa who hates mom
holy cr-p, dick is mickey rooney
kid sez bye to his droogs in soviet new york and later has dinner with havisham and sez if he were rich he'd want a pony
he wants to help people in need and havisham gives him 5 poubds to give to this chick with 6 kids
he sez bye to dick and gives him his email to send letters and dick gives him a handketchief
once in the 90s i had a hanker chiff and it turned green from overuse
then he gves hobbs an item that moves him
its actyually kinda nice
so he goes to soviet england and lives in a place on the way to the castlre but mom isn't gonna continue on as grandpa lord hates her
what did she do? sh-t in his cornflakes?!
she tells kid she's gonna live from him and he is bummed
at da castle with grandpa, grandpa is b--chy cuz hes gotr the gout
thats like aids in the slavery days
also he asks havisahm about kids looks and hates america cuz hes a commie britmo
havisham sez mom don't want grandpa to let on he hates her and is keeping em apart
da next day kid comes to da castle and is ffriendly to grandad
so later kid sez he'is gonna getta job and granndpa sez to work in the house of lords
later he meets a church dirctor or something who sez this fam needs mercy when they cant pay
kid sez to show mercy and grandpa allows this
later kid gets a pony and is happy
hes like jerrys relative from poland in seinfeld
later , kid goes to see mom and granda drices off in a cart
later, kid and grandppa goes to church aand they get a private balccony seat
nowadays they'd censor this
later grandpa and kid meet the cguy tthey showed mercy and he';s surprized grandpa and kid are so nice to him
later kid writes to his droogs about how cool grandad is and droogs tthink grandad is up to somethinge
later grandad shows kid at a party to his himies
after da party havisham tells grandad that kid is not the real Little Lord Fauntleroy and the real one is in some house
also this other chick sez grandads son married her but ditched her after she pooped out a kid
she has a birth curtificate and its a real thing, not al electromic copy like the alleged prez used to fake being from hawaii
grandad is bummed as this kid is rhe only good thing in his life
i'm kinda confused by this revalation and i'm not sure if its one of grandads other kids who was the father, or if kids dad was a maury guest
so grandora meets the new grandson sand hes a little jacka55
also i think hes a bit mentally ret-rded
the alleged mom is a j=rkoff too
wtf the baby daddy was namrd beavis
grandad sez he'd provide for her but dont wanna see them while alive
see you in h-ll!!
so grandad knows this kid will s-ck at his title but the law wont help him
why not just have em wacked?
worked for daiana with the queen
its not like the law applies to higer class brits in england
so gtandad meets kids mom and sez how great her kid is and how he boosted his life and now its all f'd
and now he dont hate her after seeing his other dauughter in law
meanwhuile, in soviet new york, dick recognizes the new kid and mom as relatives scamming and somehow gets to england
he and grandad and others confront the j-rkoff chick and out her with dicks brother ben who'ss the real father
i got mixed up b4
hobbs is there fir some reason and is lighter on monarchs adter meeting 1
so the mom gets to live in the castle with kid and grandpa
the end
that was pretty nice
mild, light, peaceful, warm, soft and positive
a good clean 30s film
wholesome and calm and with good heart
they don't amke em like this anymore
except maybe the peanuts movie
foe Little Lord Fauntleroy 2 i want him to be a teen and have to choose a wife to carry on the family legacy. also its a dating simulator on snes, gba, sega genesis, tg16 and atari jaguar where you play as the kid now teen and choose between several girls to marry.

No comments:

Post a Comment