Tuesday, February 25, 2020

Wild Guitar Review

Note: I spell better than most music today
Wild Guitar
This iws my review on Wild GuitR from 1962
ita directed by Ray Dennis Steckler who did The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies
it starrs arch hall jr and his dad arch hall sr and was made by sr to gget his son to be a star in drive in teen movies
They worked on EEgah which i thought was cool and i saw this b4 and liked it
so it starts with arch hall jr going to soviet los angelas on a motorcycle
I'd stay outta L A
all those hollywood degenerates and gangs
I've never been there but i saw that documentary, The Crow City of Angels
so garlic jr goes around the non slum areas and pretty cool music plays
he winds up at a diner with some mentally challenged guys and a blonde
he dont got much cash and ets a donut and coffee but is missing a penny for tax as l a is a commie high tax cesspoole
blonde lets him have her meal and notices his guitar
she knows about showbiz and sez u need an egde and jr sez he's got a letter from a south dakota radio station saying hes good but she sez its not worth it
also she was born in there and still aint made it but this is the year for boy singers and invites him to try out at a tv program
he hardly ate his cr-p!
he leaves his items at the diner and sez his name is bud eagel
then at da show we see blonde doing a 60s dance
btw this film is black and white and fullscreen
the guy after her goes off to puke in his saxamaphone and blonde offers jr who is put on and plays a love soong thats a bit country and sorrta like something you'd hear on happy days
music was so good b4 the beatles got everyone into drugs and b0ning
he's no yellow dancer but i like his work
so everyine loves it and a sleazy music exec saw him on tv and wants him
oh hes athe biggest manager in hollywood and played by arch hall sr
they meet and sr sez it takes a lot of cash tom get a guy famous and jr is super excited
sr sends a goon to tail him and jr and blonde go back on da show fior another scene
after that isnt shown, sr gives jr a big a55 apartment with a pool to live in and his minion steak moniters jr and do cr-p for him
sr sez he does the thinking and orders him around and when jr wants to go out and get his cr-p at da diner, sr gets b--chy and sez he might need a new singer
sr sez he needs to do da thinking and managing so he can be sure he can depend on jr for apppintmets and jr consents to following orders
bed tells steak to get his cr-p and tell the blonde he couldnt make it and goes to bed
sr sez to steak to dump his cr-p and keep the blonde and jr's bro in college away
steak goes to da diner to get da suitcase and tells da chix not much and pays a whole dollar to cover the loose ends
da nxt day jr has steak for breakfast (STEAK IS A55! BURGGERS ARE BETTER!!) And steak the goon tells jr lies about blonde
then sr comes in with a buncha guys and reads a good review on jrs show thing
4 record companies want contrax and sr sez he added dat
and not to believe what he reads but what sr tells him
sounds like thre media today
so he gives jr a new guitar and songs and sez the cost will cime outta da profits
man we're30 mins in. that felt like norrhing
the guys sr gbrought in were band members who make crax at him but sr tells em off for it
also jr gives a letter to steak to his bro to mail
piccolo jr plays a somg with da band about growing taller
sr has steak send fake letters from jrs brother and tell jr it 'll be a while b4 they see any cash
also sr tells a guy who wants jr for 500$ to pay 5000$
at da diner the ret-rded guys, blonde and owner listen to jrs songs on juke box
blonde goes to da record store to buy his music
then sr shows jr the presaidents of his fan club in high schools who give him advice like tearing off clothes
they talk business and sr sez to havve easgle feathers as a fad for bud easgle but they'd use other birds as a source
sr tells the teens to get more word out to boost sales
wait, if they are in high school, how old is jr?
i'd say 20s but a day under 18 is the same as 8 according to current laws
i think the teens are actually workers for sr playing teens
so jr wants to go home as his broos letters dont sound like him
also everything is so phony and hes a bit malcontent
hope he dont wind up like that junkie from nirvana
people in the music biz dont last long
i blame the drugs
and b0ning for those who get it from aids
sr explains business to jr and the need for fanclubs
but jr sez u cant amke people like soemthing
sr sez if someone cool does something then othrs follow and when jr's bro drank malts and others drank it he probably got payment for promoting it
jr knows he didnt and is getting disgruntled and is gonna go but sr sez he spend a lot of cash on him and all jr's works didn't dent the expenses
sr acts like he's ok losing 50 000$ on him and jr decides to work for 6 months to pay him back as hes honest and good natured
in most movies, jr would go down a dark path and become what he hated
but i think this is different
i hasnt seen it in years though
the peanuts movie didnt do taht and i loved it for that
so after more work and him doing a song that sounds kinda 50s on tv with some skimpy dressed chick dancing
oh its a song about the blonde
and shes watching on tv and runs over, probably in heels, across town to get to the stidio and smooches jr who's still therte somehow in the samre room
is she the flash?!
she sez steak told her lies and they go to a skating rink oqned by her unlce thats closed now and she has da key
but hes pretty cr-ppy at it as he thought it as roller skating
shes pro at it though
also a spotlight follows her even though the rink is closed
its the hobgoblins!!
they make out on da ice for a while as da camera spins and da spotlight eclipses past em like space
then iys daytime and they were skating all night
its kinda heartmoving
later sr sez he booked a nation wide tour and give jr a mini tape recorder
steak tells sr jr was with da girl and sr has a chick named daisy (like thre mario chicj)arranged to be his new gurl
latr a guy whon used to work for sr comes in as sr was too cheap to change da lock
h used to live there and was a singer b4 but now is a drunk
hes malcontent over styles changing and now teens are cool and tells his story thats just like what jr went through
also he points out that jr has no cash so he cant pay for his own stuff and de3pends on sr
also every cent that goes in goes to expenses
good way of getting ariound soviet california's high taxes
ex singer blacks out behind da bar and steak comes in with daisy who smooches jr  and trys to b0ne him
she dances seductivly to jrs msic an runs after the fleeing jr
look out! she's got the aids!!
ex snger stands up to steak but steak pills a gun on him and shows him the door
but they fight, singer falls down stairs and probably bitex it
jr and daisy go back in da room and she starts undressing a bit and climbs on him and smooches him w/o consent
then blonde comws in and sees em and runs
outside goku jr sees the ret-rded guys who stick him up and abduct him
thats california
they dont got a car and they walk him to a shed they probably do drugs in
they wanna ranndsome him for 5000$ but jr takes the rifle and holds em up
i love these guys man
they got a certain charm of em thats kinda 50s
jr sez he's going with em on the idnsapping and writes a randsome knote for  15 000 $
btw arch hall jr is a pretty likable actor
he's got a wholesome charm and a  home ttown feel
He otta do cameo's in modern stuff
so steak gives the cash in a bag to the drop off point and the rety-tded guys get it but steak is watchin and follows em
at da shack the guys wanna cut jr in on the cash but he dont want it
then steak busts in and the guys act mental but comic as the light swings
also theres mummified bodies in the shack and i think they might be from eegah
so the guys escape and steak gets back the cash as jr gets out
later the paper say jr is missing and blonde chats with diner owner about jr who sez the missing is a publicity stunt
shes mad at jr and its revealed jr is  working as a dish washer at the diner
they reunite and reconsile after he sez he didn't evjoy that 5kank coming n to him and they smooch
sr tells a guy on da phone  the missing jr is a publicity stunt
he's p-ssed that if jr dont show he's in da hole for all da fees for cancelling
also i think he paid off ex singer who i thought went to H E Double California
a guy comes in asking for 20$ and sez he has info on jr and woont tell da papers for 20$
they pay him and he outs jr
then pay him more to hold off on telling the papers
sr is gonna black male jr to work or he's bust of blonde
thats califorbnia
they find him and jr sez he wants his cut
sr can keep all hes got til now and they gonna start over and do things fair and legit
sr slaps jr and sez jr belongs to him and that sr can ruin jrs rep wth his liars
and they'd bust up blonde
then 20$ guy comes out saying they ran outta tape and runs in locking the door as jr beats up mr steak
steak pulls a gun on jr, which would f up their tour if he wacks him and they'd owe more cash and sr would skin him alive, but jr overpowers him
steak trys to escape but jr is on his a55 and beats the black offa him
jr punches his head just right and his eye pops out and dangls from a nerve as he screams like a monkey and starts puking blood
so jr wins and everyone comes out and the 20$ guy was his brother ted (theadore logan?)
jr wants to keep working with sr and if sr steps out of line they'll out his tappee
they agree to a fair deal and we get a beach music video of blonde danncing at da beach and him playing guitar as teens in their 30s use eagle feathers and dance
its pretty fun
the end
that was a pretty entertaining film
likable, fun, offbeat, a bit silly, lite, no tacked on sad moment, and just nice
the acting was a bit yeah but its enjoyable
its a good 60s teen movie and has a bit of 50s vibe
like the 1990 ninja turtles fiom feels a bit 80s
we love tyou arch hall jr... forever!!
good clean fun, no swearing or nude scenes or gore or degenerates
just a nice lite film
its got good flow and pacing and doesn't drag or feel long
for wild guitar 2 i want bud and the blonde to be filming a msuic video in the jungle and they get attacked by a weird cryptid and they have to fight to survive in this jungle with various animals and tembples and traps. its also an 8 bit action game like master of darkness but on master system, game gear, game boy, nes, tg16, atari 7800 and lynx and you play as arch hall jr solving traps and puzzles and fighting aniamls and cryptids with a flame thrower that uses acid fire.

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