Wednesday, December 16, 2020

Birdman Or The Unexpected Virtue Of Ignorance Review

 Note: I spell bird

Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)

this is my review on Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) from the datant future year of 2014 (the year the SDF-1 got busted in Robotech)

its directed by the mexicano who did the revenent with leonard decr-phole and stars michael keaton, zach galifinakis, ed norton, naomi watts and enema stone

i saw this b4 with my rents and they diidnt get it

it was nominated for best picture oscar but michael keaton lost to that britmo who wwas that ccripple  nerd

i mean best actor

oh, it did get best picture

i like keaton but just now found out he was against america in the 16 and 20 elections and likes peta

despie this, he's still a good actor in all thosse weird a55 tim burton movies

once my dad asked who wwas bbatman in the 80s and i said keatron

he replied, buster keaton

i'm like; 1980s, not 1880s

although buster walked off a broken neck, did his own stunts and wiggled outta a straight jacket in the sanitorium

good f--k he is batman!!

we just need lilian gish as vicky vale and lon chaney as the penguin and we can to a silent batman film!

so after text and a title we see batman in briefs floating like dhalsim in street fighter and his inner batman voice sayin he deserves better

then he goes down and does a play scene annd a thing falls from the ceilin and busts a dudes head

bayman walks off b--cching about head guy being a cr-ppy actor and how he made the thing fall

they need a new actor but all the good ones are in super hero cr-p

batman goesto his dressing room and his inner batman tells him he's better than the iron man guy and gave uop the hero cr-p and was good

then wwe get a flashbak i think of how batman gave up being a hih rank heero actor in birdman to do a cr-p a55 play

but all anyone cares about is his hero movies

i fusion summon evil hero birdman in atttack mode!

btw, this movie is filmed to look like it was done in 1 take

so then a blonde sez they got a big a55 starto replace the busted head guy and its eed norton from terminator 2 (or was that edward furlong?)

so ed gein is aa weird actor and has mmemorized the script someehow cu its his super power

he overanalyzes the script and b--ches about it and they do da scene

then emma ciomes in andd is batmans dauhter (terri mcguinnes?) and ed is gay for hher

so ed trys on an outfit and is going commando but we dont see his man thing or whizzer

blonde played by wwatts is eds gf or w/e and tells him not tto f it up

kateon i mean batman tells zach thateds the one for the part and this chick tells batman shes pregnant with his kid

so tthats damien wayne?

so they do a scene in da play and i think this is a preview

but ed  spazzes out over them not using real booze in a play and f's the show

keaton manbat wants ed out but zack sez they cant and the whole play depends on opening night and a geezer hags review

ed sez batman was great in the play and dont gget his mania did anything wrong

bamton chats with his baby momma about his junkie daughter and batoam wants to refinace this house they were gonna give his daughter

wait i think its his wife, not baby  momma

they split b4 as he thew a knife at her like he's simon belmont

she books it and bridman voice sez he should have done a cr-ppy a55 reality show and batman actor disagrees

outside ed elric sez artsy cr-p and how popular movies are a55 and they go to a bar

eddy sez previews are for figgering out what a play is about and the geezer hag review is only what matters

a fan gets a selfy with batman and ed chats with hag

later batman thinks his daighter is into drugs and finds chronic with her

despite her being the bad guy for being a junkie, she acts like batman is bad for calling her crimes out

she b--ches about batman not being good at cr-p and his choices over leaving the birdman franchise and doing a play made for white people

then b--ches about not being on twitter or facebook and not being important in a b---chy tirade

he otta bat the black offa her for that

and enema the drugs outta her

after she books it, he uses his psychic powers to move  things and smokes chronic

imagine a batman thing of him being turned into a junkie?

they had green arrow on smack or w/e

like if the joker injected him with weed and he devolved into some kinda slug like ape creature

so then theres the play and ed gein trys b0ning the chick for real in the love scnee

so the show goes well and chick is disgruntled that ed tried to b-ne her w o c; with out consent!

is that a thing on how weinstein, epstein, polanski, woody allen and ron jeremy are into non consential thins?

or that purvoo who did that brando movie with the butter butt secks?

so batmans baby momma makes out with the b0ned chick and ed comes in and she sends him out and he dont get how he was bad

then ed whines to betman thhat the gun prop looks fake

so on da roof, junkie daughter plays truth or dare with ed gein and he sez he ddont wanna b0ne her as he has limp d0ng and is only able to do stuff when actin

he has a sexy learning disability, secks lexia! he can only b0ne backwards!

so next the reviews for his play and its not much and he's disgruntled

also his baby moma reveals shes not trally preggers

so inner birdman tells batman he's a jjoke to them and eggs him on to do sh-t

he b--ches to ed nrotaon or furlong abou getiing a b0ner on the play and smacks him with a paper

then batman reveals he was mouth b0ned by his dad ot uncle or w//e n as a kid and ed feels sorry for him, but its just  acting

also he's p-ssed abouted jjabbering abbout him in an interview

so they cr-ppily fight and batman goes off as inner birman mockes him and he uses his powers on stuff to bust da room

inner birdman trys to get him to go back into the superhero movies and its kinda like what they did with venom with tom hardy

zack waks in on batman trashign the room with his hands and sez 1 hour til curtain

batman sez he's f'd out and can't do it anymore and ack sez they sold out and royalty is comming

also martin scorscence is castng a new film (which would be 20166's silence)

blonde watts cheers batman up and ed footlong chats with druggie daughter and gives her advice about not being invisible

she asks truth or dare and eachh time he sez truth she sez no

thats not how da game is played!!

so she asks how eddy red d0ng does acting and fakes being someone else in front of everyone and they start b00ning

btw, keaton did  return to hero films with spiderman home comming and morbious

so batman sez sorry about her not being preggers and they say they'd raise serial killer kids

batman sees drug daughter giggling with eddy brock and goes out for a smoke but the dooor closes and traps his robe

he takes it off and walks around the threatre in his undies through soviet new york as fans want a selfy and head mashed guy is in a neck brace and his lawyer wants financial cr-p for his crippling

he gets back in and does his part walking up through the audience

so after that he b--ches to his junkie kid about he cant sleep and needs cash and his play is f'd

then she sez a rehap trick where you write on toilet paper about the 6 billion years earth was around even though its really only 6000 as proven by creation sccience

also he's popular in tweets or youtube or w/e for being in his undies

he's a meme

so later in a bar he chats with the hagg who is gonna give him a bad review on purpose as she dont like his kind comming into her theatre world

just like disney paying reviewers to bash superhero movies not by them

he counterstrikes by picking apart her revview she's writong on dead  trees and saying she dont got the real knowledge and is just an opinion piece with no skin in da game

he tells her to jam her review in heerr saggy a55 and she vows to end his play

later he comes by a guy acting outside and wakes up in a pile of trash with inner birdman telling him he''s too good for this as he's a real star

then we see the bird man behind him and egging him on the area turns into an action movie and he starts flying andis on tp of a bbilding

he sezhe's shooting a film and a guy helps himand he jjumps off a buildingand flys across soviet new york to the theatre

bbut when he gets there, a cab driver comes out saying batman didnt pay him

is this like calvin and hobbes where we get different views on reality?

later he tells his e womanhow hes hearing a voice and oncce he tried suicide in water but it was full of  jellyfish

after she goes he loads a real firearm as he;s an american citizen ih a right to bear arms

then he does the play and the scene with ed the inbred in bed with his woman and caps himself in it

the crowd loves it and we get actual editing in here with cutting from 1 scene to the next and weird images and then hes in the hospital

so zack comes in and sez they got great reviews from the hag mo

he might get a weapons charge but zack sez to say it was an accident and ggoes oout to deal with the press

drugaughter comes in and btw batman is wearing a bandage that looks like a mask and sez he''s got 80 000 followers in a day from a twitter thing she put up

but twitter is part of the mainstrwsm media and lies annnd oppresses the truth

so she goes out and he takes off his mask andhas a new nose that's not blown off

he sees the bird man on the cr-pper and wait, he looks like kevin costner, and goes out a window cu he sees bbirds outsode

she comes bakc and looks out for him butlooks  up and smiles

the end

that was pretty good

deep andself aware and showing how suprhero movies can do to people

good look at fame and trying to be popular like those idiot teens who eat tide pods or  file their teeth

plus good editing to make it look like 1 long cut

good acting and music and i saw it on tv in fullscreen without the black bars

its high brow and deep and gets you to qustion things

plus the play they di was a real play they got the rights to

i liked it and keaton shhould have gotten the oscar for it

this play was his life

for Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) 2 i want him to have become a real hero who goes around beating up guys at night and the birdman who follows hhim around is in control some times. his psychic powers are revealed to be him bending through reality and into another realy=m where birdman is his other realm self and the more mvies he makes, the stronger he becomes. also its filmed in multiple wuick cut shots with each time someone says a line, it cuits to another guy for his line. its also a 16 bit snes, sega genesis, tg16 gba and atari jaguar game where you play as him and go around beatin up guuys and trying to deal with realm shifting in 2 worlds that are connected.

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