Coroner Creek Review

 Note: I spell like I got corn in my a55

Coroner Creek

Tghi is my recirew on Coroner Creek from the diztant future year (o D W Griffith) pf 1948 (75 years before Robotech II The Sentnels)

its directal by Ray Enright who did nothing I saw

it stars Randolph Scott from Dynamite\the 30s The Last of the Mohicans\the 1939 Jesse James\Captain Kidd\Abilene Town\Santa Fe\Seven Men from Now, Marguerite Chapman from The Seven Year Itch, George Macready from Julius Caesar\The Rifleman\the 60s The Twilight Zone, Sally Eilers from Sunrise: A Song of Two Humans\The Crowd, Edgar Buchanan from Abilene Town\The Big Trees\the 50sThe War of the Worlds\McLintock!\The Man from Button Willow\The Andy Griffith Show\the 60s The Twilight Zone\The Beverly Hillbillies, Barbara Read from noting i saw, Wallace Ford from Freaks\Blood on the Sun\A Patch of Blue\The Andy Griffith Show, Forrest Tucker from The Yearling\Chisum\Little House on the Prairie, Joe Sawyer from Arsene Lupin\The Walking Dead\The Grapes of Wrath\Santa Fe Trail\Sergeant York\The Outlaw, William Bishop ftom Cripple Creek, Russell Simpson from The Trail of '98\the 30s Abraham Lincoln\Valley of the Giants\The Grapes of Wrath\the 40s Boy and His Dog\Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, Douglas Fowley from Mighty Joe Young\da 50s Angels in the Outfield\Singin' in the Rain\The Lone Gun/The Andy Griffith Show\7 Faces of Dr. Lao, and Lee Bennett whos not on back door, soy boy, beta male, candy a55, wiener cleaner, sodom botyo, aids bag, frooty booty, banana crammer, cmmie, hippie, stoner, vegan, peta, gender offender, monkey junkie, soviet, wikipedia.

i never saw this but its based on a book i never read

after credits in colored fullscreen we egtindians attacking a coach and this White took a girl in it

then we wee randolf in town and the color took a drop and seems deader

rand ants to do something and his homie sez to be patient anf they ride off to this indian town and talk to an indian with a crippled arm from getting capped who sez a White Man got these dnans drunk and got em to jakc a coach by saying he;d get em rich and he iced the passengers and took the girl captive and  days later she seppukued with a knife

i think he b0ned her a lot and the White Man is blonde/blue eyed/manly/strong/has a face sca on his cheek (Zee Ubermwnch!)

So rand wants to catch and ice the guy who did it and is trying to get back payrole jacked from the robbery and goes offsearching severyal places like abeline and tombstone and tuson

the clors get better and worse at time sand this is like in evolution worlds how they skipped a lot of the 1t evlution game when brought to gamecube

he winds up at coroner creek i think and goes by a building tp rent rooms i think and opens room 9 after checking the book, but its really room 6 he got and theres a chick in the room caring for a drnk girl

lady wants him to bring drink girl home buthe dont wanna and when drnk wakesup, says apache cr-p and lady sez she learned it from her husband

rand takes the girl home and a guy sops him and they fight but after some guys catch rand, he explains he was bringing the drunk home and they sett;e things and the men bring her ome

guy he fought is nicer to him and offers him a job and goes back wher lady sez the guy he fought was a good fighter and the drunk should be safe fighting the rinbow guys

rand meets ladys dad whos cripled and reads The Bible and at the drunks man's place, he tells his woman off for getting drunk in public and she tells him off of b0nig some oter chick and how he married her to look good and for her looks

later rand sees a store guy in town and then to see drunk chcks husband and hes b--chy about his men and if rand will work for him.

rand tells em that husbands woman was drunk and husband matches the description of the guy who iced the coach and jacked the dough

husband dont attack and sherrf comes in and asks how his daughter is dong and husband sez good and when rand leaves husband sez he let him live as rand wanted him to draw and he dont know why

later a rival ranch owner wants rand whos name is Chris like all the Chriss's in the media like rock/noth/evans/pratt/jenner/banks/bale/chan/hemsworth and the one who was in sar trek/wonde wonan, pine, that the one

sge wants him to take on husband as thers  ot enuff and for both of em and hes tryng to get her out, but can we trust her? its her word against his and we dont know her motives

so rand goes out from the hotel and the lady who ownes it sez howhis outing the drunk as a drunk hurt the drunk more than her husnband

ran goes to live with the woman rancher and meets the other ranch hands frank and leech(like the x man kids?) and rand is the foreman with man and not skin, but he might be uncut as we never see his long parts

rand sez now they do hard work and the med stand up to him and say we aint taking orders from ur kind so rand throws him to the gorund and pcks hi up to show him whos boss

he wants em to take on the rainbow gang and not the gay lesbian allience against disagreement and they reluctangly consent

whule out by a lake, a moustache guy gets em ant gunptn and brings em to a house with the guy he fought b4 and rand sez he was on their property to meet the neighbors

fighter has the oyther guy sent off so theres no witnesses and rand fights the guy again and beats on him butothers infterfvear and hold him and fighter beats on him then stomps his shoting hand

the guy who was sent off comes back andhas a gun and holds em up to get back rand but they say he as heading for the place they planned to send him but rand wakes up wth a f'd hand

the guy is gonna end the fighrer names ernie like the muppet  but rand faces ernie and beats him with a f'd hand and asks howernie f;d his hand

after a guy sez how ernie stomped his hand, rand does it to him offscreen and tells the guys to get out or he'd waste em and he wont need indians to help

in the real version he took a big bite outt his hand and ate i with an open mouted chewing and bone shards comming out

later drunk is talking with lady and husand comes by disgruntled over it but lady sez she dont drink here

sherriff dad comes by and asks what up and husband sez ehrres a new paino comming and sherrfi dasd has meat gravey and catsup

he sees his goons in the bar saying they were f'd off their own claim and are quitting cuz they were scared and husband sez he paid em but they are too f'd out cuz they think rand will ice em

husband sez if he tries to ice them the marshalles will hunt him down and theytell him rand sed he dont need indians and husband slaps the guy wth an item and storms out

rand talks to sherrif ernie cant be chaged cuz ran hit 1st and rand is a trouble maker and they do things legal here but rand sez to tell thayt to husband

later rand gets a guy in his home and cooking and has him at gunpoint and sez he can cap him so he falls on the stove and get hsi face cooked off and has him get coffee for both to "settle his nerves" as cafeen makes you calm

the guy tells him they brought cattle in this canyon and would light the grass and send the cows running and he'd do it for money so rand would get the blame like when THEY did da tovvurz and blamed the gaijin

rand sez husband would ice him to cover his tracks and sends him out and if he comes back rand will ice him and later rand goes to talk with lady rancher about the cattle and shipping em

so later he goes out to where the guy he was gonna cook was gonna meet someone and the lady i think comes by and he sends her in and husband with a scar on his face like pachino and the 30s scarface comes by but leaves after a few gunshots

lay asks why not let it go and rand wants to do hsi vengeance and she sez to try to rise above the storm and what shoudl he do after it and rand dont care and sez he wont hurt others, but she sez hi being hurt can hurt others and he in a web of his own making

scar face husband goes by to start the fire and soaks the place in lighter fluid and throws a lamp in it then lights the grass as the cattle spazz out, then goes home and his drunk wife is badly playing piano and probably drunk so he backhands her a55

her dad comes in and comforts his drunk daughter and later rand finds out the fire was done and b--ches at the farmhand for not watching but he sez he was never told it was fire and didnt think the husband would russle it

its the 8ummer part where things look f'd and ranch lady sez rand brought em cr-p but he sed he was a lightning rod, but rightnng rods prevent lightening, not attract it

so the guy who had the ernie at gunoint is gonna go and sez he liked him beating the black offa ernie coombs which is the name of canadian kids show hero dr dressup

so he sez that lady rncher like monster rancher but for chicks like pixie in her succubus style thing and fur bikini like a go nagai character sez the cattle were lost but he tells her they can rebuild

ernie gun aimer is asked by lady rancher to go on a mission and not like ninjas with naruto and the next day scar husband is in town toface rand and its church going on with a constantly ringing church bell like when is time to come back in from recess in grade school

rand meets the druk wife and sez sorry for outing her as a drunk but she sez he had the right to say what he did (America b--ch) and scarface isgoing outta control and she left him after ranf came in

rand moves back in the hoyel and sez the lady rancher lost her 2 year olds but means cattle not kids being cooked alive in the fire as they scream and rupture and organs spill out like the dogs in shojo tsubaki aka midori

the sherrfi is after scarface and some guys come in with a guy they say iced another guy and say a guy named andy west liek adam west got iced and ernie is one of the guys who saw it

wait it was ernie said to have iced andy and i think andy is the guy who had ernie and droogs at gunpoint

also andy was the rands friedn and bit it and its like in Gilgamesh with his devolved himie biting it after helping him

so the people are amazed sherrif took the scarface guys down and the ernie thinks its a joke that hes in there but sherrif sez its real this time

scarcface comes in andaks why his goons are in jail and sherrif sez tney are doing it legal and even though scarface made him sherrif he's rebelling

scarfacehas a speech on how hes worked top hard to let it all fall now and caps the sherrif and frees his goons and ran coms by to find it and goes off to finsih this

h goes in a room but lady rancher tackels him and they avoid gunfire as she knows its a trap

ernie fires on him but gets capped and with his last life, staggers and fires to no effect like the mongloian in hokuot no ken when he was beat but tried a final move on kenshiro

ATTAATATATATATATATATTA! HOKUTO HYAKU RETSU KEN!

a guy is sneaking aorun abve em and lady rancher gets a gun and frs, hitting a thing that fell and knocked the guy down andrand interrogates him with a foot on his hand to find scarfae is on the town hall

rand takes him along at gunpoint as he sez how ernie iced his homie and how it feels to be capped

they go in and rand uses the guy as a human shiled and soaks up a few shots form  scarface

rand sez the chick he iced on the coach with money was gonna marry him and he throws the knife  in the most impossible way

scarface treis to escape but the ladder falls and he gets iced by the knife the chick seppukued in and ran remembers how The Lord says vengeance is His and he seez there is a God andgoes off having found peace and walks off with lady rancher

the end

That was pretty good

nice twists and god action

randolph was pretty bada55 and the music and acting is good

well filed and good style

its a 40s movie but him breaking the uys hand was like a gangster film or ninja thing

plus his woman getting it at the start was unexected

its dark but not depressing as its filmed positive with good color and light

its got more edge and bite than most movies of the era and is a bit film noir

Glad I saw it, its pretty cool

For Coroner Creek 2 I want the ex wife of the scarred guy to deal with her alocoholism and finding a big manly guywho dont drink and leads her to salvation. Also its a 32/64 bt mini game thing on n64, ps1 sega saturn and 3do where you do mini games like in amazing island to overcome temptaion to drink and buid will power as a metaphorical representation of her desire and the addiction.