The Balloonatic Review

 Note: I spelly Loonie

The Balloonatic

This is my review on The Balloonatic from the distant future year to Yagyu Jubei of 1923 (100 years before Robotech II The Sentinels)

Its directed by Buster Keaton who did Our Hospitality/Sherlock Jr./The Navigator/Seven Chances/Go West/The General/The Cameraman/Steamboat Bill Jr/The Frozen North/The Electric House, and also doreceetec by Edward F. Cline who did The Scarecrow/The Frozen North/Captain January/The Electric House.

It stars Buster Keaton from Coney Island/he Scarecrow/The Frozen North/The Balloonatic/Our Hospitality/Sherlock Jr./even Chances/he General/he Cameraman/Sunset Boulevard/Around the World in 80 Days/The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn/It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World/The Twilight Zone/Steamboat Bill Jr/The Elctric House, Phyllis Haver from Don Juan 1926, and extra thicc Babe London from The Snake Pit.

I never saw this b4 but buster is usually great and its one of his last films before getting into feature length ones.

After title and some crdits we hear or rather read its summer afternoon at an anmusement park

buster goes around a haunted house and finds a skleton in a coset, which might be real as this was right after ww1

He opens another door and its full of smoke with a guys feet visible

He opens a ouble doors but is gonna bust woever coms out with a statue but a big dragon thing comes out and in and he jumps back and falls in atrap door

he was in the house of trouble and falls out the front on a slide on his a55 that as never b0ned

this chubby chic comes by and gts a ticet then goes in and buster waits for her to come pooping out the chute

 brad walks by and e tries to look tough but she don't ant him and walks on

he forgot about the fat chick and se slides dowb an gets him in the head with her thicc a55

she gets up and goes back in ater getting another ticet

buster runs off and comes across a woman wanting to cross a puddle but is too devolved to step in or over it

so buster puts his coat down and a car runs over it and drives off with the chick

he gets his coat on and sees a dame going to the old mill and goes after her and in he same boat next to her

they go in this tunnel and he comes out all beat uo and i think he tried b0ning her and he didn't consent

she gets in a car and drives off as the gaijin areas in the 21st century dont let women do what 1900s America can

Buster goes to a balloon and some monopoly guy looking heteroes are there

buster takes off a sand bag but a big guy puts it bac and buster is given a triangle flage to put on something

he goes up and this guy gets in the balloon basket and the balloon takes off but the basket floor comes off and i goes up w/o him

buster puts the thing on the balloon top somehow and  didn't notice he took off and stands up, look around and climbs down to the basket but didn't notice its bottomless and nealy falls in

he spazzes out ad climbs in and hangs on and we fae out and in to him cleaning something but i think he drops the soap and not like in jail

he lowers duck decoys like duck dynasty with those kind loving rednecks and that makes soviets like morrisey think its murder to eat meat even though most animals do it

he gets a shotgun or rufle andfires but i think hits the balloon and it falls and he's in a tree with an fd balloon

he makes some ind of camp and has a canue in III segments like a human centipede and ties it together with rope, which won't keep out water

the mill chick is there and he should've went with the fat one, and mill hic is fishing

buster goes in the river and fishes with a rod and not his footlong b0ner and goes too deep but not in the a55 and nearly is swept off

he comes out of the water an does a handstand and the water barfs out of his pants

he goes back and casts his line bur it goes over a branch and gets him in his virgin a55 and  hm pulling it flips him in the water

he goes to a long piece of land in the river and tries dipping a rope in the water to catch fish but it dont work and he walks in the water to move the fish

chick sees a fish go by and catches it in a net but i think they used a dead one

she goes up but the net breaks and it goes back in the river and she catches it with her hands like a ninja

buster chases fish into a no exit water thng and blocks it with rocks

chick goes out in a 20s swim suit thats not a sling bikini like in Mazinkaiser and buster built a rock wall and grabs fish to put in his basket but its gt a hole in its a55 and the fish fall out

eventually he notices the same fish keept being grabbed and he checks the basket and throws it on the floor to litter, he worst crime, worse than soviets breeding man ad ape

buster puts fish in his clothes but some bite him or w/e and he puls em out

evenully the roc wall busts and flushes hm down like a t-rd in the pipes

cick jumps in the water but lands on bustr who was right there, as a thing on the fat chick landing on him so it could crunch together into a huma centipede

they meet and her b00bs are man which is Japanese for her nips are pointy and shes mad too

buster gets on land and she throws rocks at him as he flops his legs in rubber pants

later he goes canoeing and his cr-p mobuile canue breaks apart so he snaps it back together like a mode kit

chick cooks fish on a bbq or something and buster catches a fish sitting in his canue with a pole and using a tennis racket as a net

he puts straw in the boat and lights a fire to cook it like he's beavis and butthead and puts the fish between 2 rackets over a fire

the canue is called the Minnie tee hee ad the racket bursts into flame and he drops the fish in the flame and laves the fire burning

eventually his oat is leaking and he uses hi straw hat to scoop out water

chick has coffee but its too hot and she blows steam out her mouth and throws the coffee away

buster tries the canue again and sees a rabbit and goes out of the water with his legs out the bottom like a Halloween costume and i remember this clip but didn't know ts from thism nor did i see it coming

he pulls a gun and sees the bunny has babies and spares it

and the mom is white but the babies are brown, like university girls

buster goes back to the river from whence it came and reads a magazine but goes over a waterfall and flips so his lets are out the canue going backwards

chick sees the legs spazzing out and throws a rope to him but its da whole rope and not 1 end

the canue lands at the shore and buster seems to not need air like mario or vector man and she goes to flip the canoe but no ones in it and the legs are rubber pants

sje looks around and he come out from under her for the third thing andflips her

they get  out of the water and later made modifications on the canue to be a fancier thing

chk is by a rock thing and this long horn bull or steer like rockos modern life is looking at her and might wanna b0ne her

buster gets a gun but throws it down and tries swimming but i only an inch deep

he gets the gun and crosses the river like Moses and fires but it j-zzes water on her which can be edited to look like he blasted his goo on her

he fires again and it poops out a flaming t-rd that blasts smoke and what kinda gun is this!?

buster fiddles with the gun and it poos aother smoking flame thng and chick got tite of waiting and grabs the bill by the horns and not the sh-ts

buster comes out but nor like bac door ba rock and his butt buddy big mike and sees her wrestl the animal to the ground

she could do it the whole time and wanted hm to do ll the work for her

women, they do that

he goes by some boulders and wants buster chaplin to get over here and he runs off eventually

as he walks off a big black bear comes by him and follows him

se chops down a tree and it fall on her and shes pinner

buster sees a squirrel and cawls to it with the bear on his a55

chick sees and i think it was someone elsewho got a tree on him

as buster is gonna cap the squirrel, which would blow it apart like a dog in a microwave, this orher big black bar comes oyt an he backs away

he raises his gun like a clb and busts 1 bears hwad an it makes the gun go off and blow out the other one

he rolled a 20

so he sits on the bear and don't notice for a bit but gets up and sees it a bear and freaks out

after checking it and seeing its dead, he walks bak to thechock and stomps around masculinly

the clubbed bear gets up and comes or em and buster leans ack in fear but on her and she thinks he's being romantic

they take off in the fancied up boat and i think bears can swim so they're gonna get it

remember grizzley rage? tat movie was a55 an so bad its good

so they think they got away but see the bear on the shore and not pauly or pauly D an he plays a ukulele

theres a big drop waterfall and hey go over but float in the air as its equipped with a balloon and they float off

the front and back fall off the anue as a ef to the human centipede 001 andthey enoy being together

the end

that was pretty good

not suoper epic but had some good gags and i didn't expect some of the results

goo direction and fiming

nice acting and evn the animals di well

buster used good skill in sme things lik the hand stand

the chick was well done and i didn expect the ening

its a silid film and only 26 mins

I've seen better but this wasn't bad

For The Balloonatic 2 I want them to be in the air and find a hidden air kingdom of grasshopper people and try yo escape from the aero city by using vaudeville moves. Also its a 16 bit beat em p on Sega Genesis, Snes, TG16, Atari Jaguar and GBA where 1 player is buster and the other is the chick and you fight the sky people and their hybrid slaves and ancient tech warriors that are light to stay in the sky kingdom  so they break when hit.