Our Man In Havana Review

Note: My keyboard is cr-ppy but not as bad as cuba got

Our Man In Havana

Tis is my review on Our Man In Havana from the distant fiture year of 1959(70 years before Rpbotech eason 2)

Its directed by Carol Reed who did Oliver!

It stars Alec Guinness from 1946 Great Expectations/The Bridge on the River Kwai/Lawrence of Arabia/Star Wars/The Empire Strikes Back/Return of the Jedi/Star Wars: The Force Awakens/Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, demon worshipprr Burl Ives from Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer/Little House on the Prairie/East of Eden/Cat on a Hot Tin Roof/The Big Country/Hugo The Hippo, Bada55 Cathiolic Maureen O'Hara from Jamaica Inn/The Hunchback of Notre Dame 1939/Miracle on 34th Street 1947/The Quiet Man/War Arrow/McLintock!/Big Jake/The Christmas Box, Openly Hungarian Ernie Kovacs from North to Alaska, Noel Coward from Around the World in 80 Days 1956, Ralph Richardson friom The Four Feathers 1939/Anna Karenina 1948/Oscar Wilde 1960/Exodus/Doctor Zhivago/Rollerball 1975/Watership Down, Jo Morrow from 1960 13 Ghosts, Grégoire Aslan from Mr. Arkadin/King of Kings 1961/Cleopatra 1963, Paul Rogers from The Trials of Oscar Wilde 1960, Raymond Huntley from nothing i saw, Ferdy Mayne from 1959 Ben-Hur/Where Eagles Dare/The Eagle Has Landed/Conan the Destroyer/Howling II: Your Sister Is a Werewolf, Maurice Denham from Animal Farm 1954/The Nanny 1965/Countess Dracula, Duncan Macrae from nothing i saw, Hugh Manning from Quatermass and the Pit/The Elephant Man, Karel Štapanek from nothing i saw, Maxine Audley from 1948 Anna Karenina/1960 The Trials of Oscar Wilde, Good Christian Timothy Bateson from The Evil of Frankenstein/Labyrinth/Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, John Le Mesurier friom Ben-Hur 1959, and some guys not on back door, aids bag, gender offencder, sfrooty booth, Sodom bottom, candy a655, banana crammer, queer as a deer with a steer in it real himmi[pie stoner venag pet tree kung fu based on plants Wikipedia who denies the mud floor and tartaria but sez the moon laning and evolution and grlobal warming is real

its based on a book by graham greene who did Brighton Rock/The Quiet American

after tuitle an credits in pre soviet cuba  saying its befoe the recent malcontent uprising, we see wa man in a dark suit going by an seeing an atomic pile vacuum

he meets burl wait its another guy whos a cop meeting him and asking for his papers

this military guy frills burl over the English man he talked to an lests him go

duit guy is given a demonstration of the vacuum and suit talks of the vacuum guys daughter and heatrs hes brittish too

he leaves sayng he'd see him again and vacuum guy talks with burl about suit guy and a grl whos mom he dont know where she is and how he wants his daughter to ahve a good life and not a Cuban one

wait til the commies come in

a irl comes by and vacuum guy sez his irl has an American acent and at home he feels like a gaijin

the dangers of going to a dark land, the blackness taints you

dad comes home and his blonde white daughter want this horse she bought to count as several xmas and b ay presents as her b day is coming

a blonde oinnocent girl in a Mexican place? this is how p0rno starts

look at hwo Mexicans keep drawing android 18 with a guge butt an big ugly homies as krillin watches

also the horse is White

suit guy walks down the street as a band plays after im and he comes to a bar with vacuum guy and wants something from him saying "dont let hme down/ur an englihman aint ja"

they go in the bathroom but instead of b0ning like George Michael, suit guy sez hes an agent and they need a man in Havana for brit intesrtsts besides big teeth and aids

a guy comes in and they fake beig normal and after he leaves suitmo sez meet him elsewhere

at home he puts some horse this or sm harness on his blonde daughter and sez they might go to Switzerland but she wants tooin the riding club

dad does a clown act and they talk of his woman and she prays for her and hopes she comes back

he goes to meet  suit mo and is told to have a book for the code and an electric kettle for messages

they used the book lamb as it was that or uncle toms cabin and i guess he dont like coloreds as this is the 50s

suitmo tells his superior his report on the new member vacuum guy whs doing cr-ppy

theres a country club thats 500 pounds and they think its for recuiting agents but hes doing it for his blonde virgin daughter

he goes in the club and tri recuiting guys but not like the banana crammers and 1 Mexico thinks hes trying to b0ne ihim

he kinda s-cked at being an agent and not cuz hes a britmo who dont have a soul

why does America let england exist? they were the bad guys for hundreds of years. if we have 1 more royal wedding or kid pooped out i say we nuke em. i'm sck of hearing of these nobodies. its lie the kardashians but inbred.

he trie recuiting surb i mean burl and later sez he met an enegnieer who has navel contacts and ants to recuit another guy for soem reason

he contacted an atress amd theres kind of a montage to meico music as its south of teas and speaks Spanish

after locking up he sees a vaccum looking like some metrolpois thing and draws a story on a pilot recruited in the brits thing to see a rocket in the snow covered hills of pre soviet cuba

blonde aughter wants to read lamb but he sez he wants to

he goes to see burl who's place was f'd and a guy wanted him to do something not for drs like him

he' given up like a candya55 andvacuum guy draws a vacuum thing with a guy looking dark like the sleepwalker in the cabinet of dr Caligari with a cane

the brits see the drawings andthink its real and dont get how he go e v enen though the planes patrol the area

they think this will make nukes look conventional and thank suit guy for finding the guy who found it

in this club, burl/bacium/blonde have dinner andhis book thing worked well and hes driunk

a Saddam looking guy in military dress comes by and blone dont like him as Maureen watches with jewrish hair

saddad wants to dance wih himi man londe but Maureen quitrts him with booze and eing a Mexican Saddam guy is into her then goes off

Maureen sez she his secretary an he neer heard from the brit ad e goes with it

blonde innocent daughter thinks dad vacuum is into heran Maureen oins as his secretary

theres an inssue with montes the pilot he made up for his stoey and he pretends to call hum and sez he'd meet him in the country club

after leaving her Catholic School in aWhite uniforme the Saddam guy picks up the blonde and i  hope that animal dont stick hi circimsuzed thing in her

so the thing goes on andi missed some as i was looking for a post i made a while ago

burl sez there was a crash and the agent monetgue or w/e but it and vacuum guy comes to a club saying the chicks look the same like Japanese

Saddam guy meets vaccum guy an shows recording of him aying Montez is dead and the accident was meant to be a warning

but vacuum guy sez he dont know Montez an goes

then burl sez Montez was an invention or something but worked too well or something and i think he implies he really iced a guy but im looking up my creationist posts cuz a guy wants to send creationism to a guy he dont like

Saddam brings a guy who sez vacuum guy taled with Montez andsadda sez the guy isn't a poor so hes not torturable to get him to say things

Saddam guy wants to have vacuum guy as a double agent and will pay him well instead of deporting him

suitmo sez they thought his info was fake an d vacuum parts til they learned a guy wanted to wack him with poison like THEY do and thim hes honest

so later there's a dinner  and he worries someones gonna poison him

he gives a speeh on communism another thingsand a guy who dra nk something spilled it and a dog drank it and died

good, dogs s-ck, send em to the Korean ovens

Saddam later wants to marry vacuum guys blonde virgin daughterand breed with her with his befouled dna on her superior one to poison her bloodline with gaijin filth

might as well breed with an ape

addam guy implies his gun is better than a vacuum and has a firearm on his aist

oh and in a scene i gforgot to say, bur sez his fam was in Germany and left

i thin someone got iced and vacuum guy sez to Maureen he made up all the cr-p and wnders if he'd get hard time for lying to the gov as its different when the gov lies to you

the brita can't get him in pre soviet cuba unless they send a team of sneaks to kidnap him and bring him out to triy him in an unfair trial he's got no chance in like that German in South America

so daughter blone virgin and Maureen goes to the movis and vcuum guy plays checkers wit Saddam where taking pieces means youdrink as they are booze bottles

he gets not Saddam to take off his belt with a gun

wait i tink its chess an its lie sailor moon wit amy vs birdie and Saddam blacks out so drunk vacuum guy takes his gun and goes to a casino night zone

he tells brit mo hes sorry for his drunk speech and felt for te dead dog saying it had worms

he invites britmo to a club i mean suitmo who wants to ice vacuum guy

after being in a cr-ppy place with suitmo waiting for someone and a h00ker i think wants to do stiuff, wait i think it a strpper

vacuum guy sez this place is near where they end and they go off into the night as the camera angle tilts lie the 60s batman or battlefield earth

vacuum guy gets him alone and caps him butonly brakes his pipeand when the door opens he cap him and a Mexican cick maybe Maureen sees

at vacuum house Saddam wakes up and his gun is in the holster and goes

thres a ervice for some guy i think britmo or burl and Saddam shows up an gives vacuum mo deportation to soviet englan so he brings his daughter to switzarland tohave school

at the airport Saddam gives em presents an gives vaccum mo 2 bullets that vacuum sez is a oke

the brit hiher ups wonder what wnt wrong and 1 thinks they can use a vacuum as a weapon and if they try him for treason

vaccumo an blonde still virgin and butt virgin get to candy a55 England

the higher ups say tey gotta tell the minister its a new vacuum

Maureen is being sent to some aids hole and vaccum mo sez she didn't know

late theres vacuum mo and muaureno or maruneen o hara or w/e sees a robot vacuum  mnade in Japan and goes off together

i gurss they got off as the high ups dint wanna atmit to being duped

the end

that wasn't so bad

not reat but it ad good ideas

it was made in communist cuba and castro helped but whined it didn't make the former gov loo brutal enuff

but its a comedy and meant to be fun of the brits and their gayness

its well acted but kinda feels longer than it is

kinda expected the Saddam guy to get it or be framed for icing the suitmo but i guess its like riki-oh where yomi kinda is dropped and never mentioned again in the books

its got soem smart ideas and shows how big gov has issues and the brits dont work right and is a bit like dr Strangelove but not as openly fun

its in black and White and i thin is in widescreen but dont recall

it a decent film and dont have much swering or lust but its mostly implied

a kinda clean 50s movie

now is this connected to Dirty Dancing Havana Nights?

For Our Man In Havana 2 I want it to be when castro too over and the daughter is grown up to be a body builder commando who sneaks in to take out the commies. Also is amale body bulder guy who is her team mate and they take on the commies with sneaking around and wailin on commies who are 5'1 from no nutrition and animals who have more rights than people. Also its a 16 bit beat em up on Sega Geneiss, Snes, TG16, Atari Jaguar and GBA with 1 player as the daightr and 1 as the dude.