Friday, October 14, 2016

Little Shop Of Horrors Review

note; cant type right. still
little shop of horrors
this is my review on little sop of hporors
its made by roger corman\
love his cr-ppy awesome films
it starts with a pan of an illustration
I'm doing the 60s version btw
a cop narrates his disgruntled issues working homoside
at a plant store people talk
1 is an 1800s born eastern European lady
its like my gramma or great gramma
the owner of the flower shop is also Slavic
just like me
I'm double Slavic though
half polish half Slovenian
a dentist orders fowers and this wiener named seymore (see more)is to deliver em
I think its the same guy from a bucket of blood
a guy starts eating flowers he bought
he didn't leave yet
i sometimes dream of eating cards and toys
seymore is fired for s-cking too much
he sez he's growing a new plant
the flower eater sez weird places have better flowers
the owner sez is seymores plant is good he can stay at the job
seymoe goes home and his mo makes him look at her tongue
I assume they were b0ning in the real version
like goku's wife and son are paired up in dbz fanfics
maybe hes giving her an enema
he brings his mom a highly alcoholic tonic
I like the jazzy music in the background
he gets his cr-ppy plant and returns to work
he got the seeds from a Japanese guy
\he names the plant after the girl he has a b0ner for
the flower eater sez it might be the only plant of its kind on earth
so if seymore can make it healthy he can keep his job
the girl tries to cheer up seymore but he sez he's tred every kind of plant cr-p he can fnd
she leaves and he talks to the plant
then its night and the plant opens up
he pricks his finger on another plant and his blood goes into the plant
it likes it
so he self mutilates his finger with a pin and bleeds into it
the next day everyone cheers for him and he gets a 2 $ raise cuz the plant grew a foot
seymore claims the finger wounds are bee stings
imagine if he got a b0ner and b0ned the plant and it sucked blood out his thing
that's sick
I got some f'd ideas
then some 50s babes come in and wanna se the plant
they buy cr-p from the store as its good enuff to make the plant it should be good to buy from
the owner sez saymore is his new son and to call him dad
he has big plans for his future cuz of his upcoming success
the Slavic gramma came in and bought owners and leaves
then they notice the plant is floppy
later the lant sez ; feed me
sounds like something in a fat chick video
seymore gives more blood but he cant give much more
to clear his mind he goes for a walk
at the train station he throws rocks and  kills a guy
hes not dead but he gets splattered by a train
if this was the 80s we'd see him splatter like a garbage bag of chef boy ar dee
seymore carries the parts back and feeds em to the plant
he carried em in a sack
it takes a bit b4 he feeds the plant the parts
I wonder if he fed the plant the guys crotch
meanwhile te owner and girl are at a restaurant and he forgot the cash at the store
he goes to the store and sees saymore feeding the plant body parts
he returns and orders a lot of booze to get drunk
he wants to go to the cops but changes his mind after he sees a huge a55 crowd at his store
they've been making a lotta money
all cuz of the plant(which is bigger now)
he talks to seymore about the plant but seymore has a toothache
turns out that after the plant eats 3x its full grown
but this one might be full grown
reminds me of my 90s childhood where my mom grew sunflowers in the backyard
once I played like it was power rangers and the seeds were an attack from that water or plant monster that blasted the black ranger by the ocean
at the dentist the dentist is a sadist
he wants to take the seymores teeth for himself
tooth fetish
he yanks out a tooth
after a fight he kills the dentist by accident\
then jack Nicholson comes in
hes a masochist and is an ndertaker for the Slavic 180s woman
is teeth are all f'd up according to him
he reads a magazine and lols at people's bodies being f'd
he loves being mutilated and stabs his finger and licks the blood
seymor drills jack nicholsons mouth and pulls out teeth
jack loves it as hes a purvo
afterward his teeth are all looking f'd
how come you can tear or punch out teeth but if you pull out someones bones with your hands or pliars its "too much"
later he feeds the dentist to the plant
later cops talk and 1 sez he lost a id cuz he was playing with matches
I used to go into the corner of the backyard and light matches when I was a kid
the cops are looking for something
\I wasn't paying attention
the next day the plant is bigger
the girl gives the seymore a smooch and hes surprised as no one ever kissed him
they kiss a bit
they wanna go on a date
the 1800s lady comes in and sez her nephew's son bit it playing with matches
\the cops confront the owner about the wacked guys but hes nervous
they leave and he confronts seymore
seymore sez its done eating
he sez symore can go out as the owner is gonna watch the plant
a chick with a flower fetish talks with seymore about the plant
she sez hes gonna get a trophy for his plant
its flowers are gonna open tomorrow and shes coming then to give it to him
later seymore takes the girl to dinner at his moms place(hee he lives)
she serves them cough syrup
she later feeds em cod liver oil soup
while the owner watches the plant it sez "feed me"
it sez it wants to eat him
I can imagine it launching tentacles at him and pulling him into its a55
at dnner the mom thinks Seymour is too young to marry(he's like 34)
at da store a guy comes in with a gun
he wants the cash made by all the people coming in
at gunpoint he tells the crook to check nside the plant
he crawls in and the plant eats his a55
the next day the owner wants to get rid of the plant
the seymore and girl are gonna have a picknick in the flower shop
symroe\s mom is malcontent over her son seeing a girl
at the picnic they talk abou their dreams for the future
they're in love with eachother
but the plant keeps calling to feed it
it screws up their date and she leaves\
rather than explaining, he jabbers on
he argues with the plant about all the good he's done for the lant
its like a reverse giving tree
the plant mind controls him to get hi food
he ignores a 50s blonde bimbo who keeps trying to seduce him
she trips him with a banana peel
w+hy's a babe like dat want a bum like dat?
its like how in yugioh zexal, where Yuma has anna cathy and tori into him
she tries to seduce him but hes only into finding food
he sez he needs a fatter ne
he wants a fat chick
after miscommunication she agrees to be his
as he has no coin to flip, he flips a rock
it busts her head\
the next day all these chicks wanna see seymore and the girl he likes dont get him
1 copooks just ike kip fro napoleon dynamite
everyones gathered to see the plant flowers open ad to give him te award
but the flowers have the human faces of its victims
its ike that fata55 from inuyasha
seymore runs and the cops tail his a55
the plants victims on his back is like with Jinmen from devilman
we get a long chase scene
the owner helps Seymour
Seymour hides in a toilet thing and his head comes outta it like in the ghoulies
later he goes after the plant with a knife and climbs in
later the rest of the gang get there and a new flower opens with Seymour\s face on it
he sez; I didn't mean it
the end
I liked that
good 50s/60s low budget fun
we love you forever roger corman
direct more cr-p!
I loved Frankenstein unbound!
for little shop of horrors 2 i'd like for the plant to have captured the souls of the people it ate and has access to their memories. its doing this to attempt to copy human abilities and so it can have a soul. the girl Seymour liked tries to free him and manages to pull him off but he becomes a plantman with vegetable organs and a zucchini b0ner. they breed and she gets plan pregnant and starts expanding all over into an 800lb fattie from the malreaction of an inhuman pregnancy. she gives birth to a plant human with the power to talk to plants and only wants people to eat animals as pants are people too(note; the kid doesn't have a soul as he's a plant) she feeds her plant baby with fruit punch breast milk and she's full of juice from the pregnancy.

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