Friday, October 7, 2016

The Cabinet Of Dr Caligari Review

note; bad typing + bad keyboard = bad review
the cabinet of dr caligari
this is my review on the cabnet of dr cagari(1920 version)
I don't normally do silent films
bt this one isn t hard to review
its not that long and or complicated
plus ive seen it a lot
this film is done in "german expressionism" style
think nightmare b4 Christmas Halloween town
it looks like if tim burton and dr seuss did drugs together
I hould mention that this film is based on actual events
1st, the film makers malcontentary over world war 1
and 2nd is more disturbing
one night in 1910s Germany, this guy saw a man in the bushes.
the next day, a woman's body was found there.
at the funeral, the man was seen there too.
but he was never charged.
no one knows what happened to him.
or where he is now.
that's f'd up
although hes probably long dead by now
the film starts with 2 guys in an outside and talking about weird stuff
1 guy sez he's tormented by spirits and t drove him rom hi home and family
the main guy sez this offbeat spacy chick walking by is his future wife and starts telling his story of meeting her
I gotta say, the inter titles(words on screen) are in  a crazy font
all jagged and bold
back in his hometown (most of this movie is flashback) was the annual fair
this creepy guy who looks like the dr in |my secret identity" is up to something
the main guy has a homie called alan
they decide to go to e fair
the creepy guy is dr caligari and goes to the town office thing to get a permit for his fair thing
the office guy s on a high chair to show hes higher rank than caligari
caligari has micky mouse gloves!
his fair shw is a sleepwalker
they say somnambulist but that's the medical term
I like how in the 1910s people wore cloaks/capes
at the fair caligari rings a bell and invites people to see cesare the sleepwalker
meanwhile, a toe clerk was shanked dead by a weird pointy thing
at the fair, fransis (the hero) and his homeboy allen go see caligari
he sez Cesare is 23 and has sept 23 years
if that's true I don't see how he can eat or dump or learn to talk
caligari can awaken him from his slumber and have him tell the future or past
des he astral project?
I now a confederate guy who sez he can
caligari opens a cabinet and in it is coned viedt (who ooks a lot like Edward scssorhands)
caligari awakens him and its quite creepy nd cool
he walks out(despite having been asleep for 23 of hi 23 years)
caligari invites the audience to Q & A with Cesare as he knows every secret the past and the future
maybe his dreams tell him
my dreams sometimes come true
alan asks; how long will he live?
Cesare sez; until the break of dawn!!
why would you want to knw how long you'll live?!
it would literally ruin the rest of ur life!
if you got years then knowing when it ends makes u worry about it
and if its not long then thats worse!
the leave and a guy lights a lamp with the light painted on the floor b4 he lit it
this is like a dream
the see a newspaper saying 1000 marks reward for the capture of the killer
I love the settings in here
its so offbeat and weird
on the way home alen sez to fransis they both love this chick and its up to her to decide
but they\ll stay friends
that night alan is shanked dead by a guy we only see the shadow of
fransis fins out about it the next day
wow, we're 30 mins in and it feels not like it
frasis tells the cops of the Cesare prophecy
on his way home he meets the spacy chick who seems normal now
I like how she has long hair
in the mid late 20s must chix cut theirs
shes milky white too
like my gf
but my gf is like 220 and this chick is like 130 max
a cop gets a warrant to check the seepwalker
at night a scuzzy guy tries to ice someone
but the cops get him
\meanwhile caligari feeds Cesare
does he wipe his a55 too?
that reminds me of my 600lb life with chicks too big to wipe or walk
the cops show up an question caligari
meanwhile the cops bring in the scuzzy guy
back at caligari's plce, the cops examine the Cesare but get a newspaper saying they caught the killer
the cop leave
but caligari lols
so the spacy chick is worried about her dad who's been out for a whilethe scuzzy guy sez hes not the killer but tired to wack the cick he tried to wack to pin the crime on the killer theire looking for
man his film hasa lot of switching between subplots
in transformers they have that tune with the autobot or decepticon logo flipping
the spacy chick gos to see caligari and he shows her his Cesare
not his wiener
his sleepwalker
wait that sounds wrong too
she freaks out and runs
how'd the fransis know this if he wasn't there?
t night the fransis sneaks into caligari\s tent
meanwhile, cesare goes to the spacy chicks house
he pers in her window like count orlok and comes in
hes about to waste herbut cant
I think she gave him his 1st b0ner
she wakes up and he somehow makes her unconscious amd he swipes her
he carries her up the rooftops and after he leaves these men arrive and see them
how'd fracnses know about this if he wasn't there?
the men follow Cesare acros this weird tim burton land and he drops her and runs
he keels over for no real reason in a painted on field
the girl is safe but freaked out and sez its Cesare
but the fransis sez he wateched Cesare sleeping at caligaris for hours
fransis tells he cops
i'd like it if they wore the ww1 german helmets
the ones with the spike
those were cool
zee kaizer!!
the cops show the scuzzy guy is stll in the cell
they check on caligari and he wont let em in
but hey go I and find the ceare he had in there is a fake man(jinzou ningen in Japanese)
caligari books it and is followed acros a wird awesome tim burton landscape to a nut house
its got a Japanese sun like light and shadows painted on the floor
fransis asks about caligari nd its revealed the head dr was him
the dr is being observed while in his villa and he other drs go through his things
they find a book about sleepwalking (the dr's specialty)
they find an account of in 1783 a guy called caligari in Italy had a sleepwalker named Cesare
he used the Cesare to wack people and spread fear
he also used  puppet lookalike of Cesare to keep the suspicion off him
then in caligari's diary they find he was give a sleepwalker
btw, theres a skeleton in caligari\s room
I assume its real
this is the 1910s
hr starts fawning over the sleepwalker and can finally live his dream of being caligari
I assume he was b0ning the sleep walker too
he wanted to see if he can get a sleep walker to do evil
what good will it do?
he became obsessed with he idea and it made him go nuts
why not get surgery and change ur name if ur so mental over him?
theres a good scene of him outside and the wrds "be caligari" imposed aroundit
if this were sound he'd use creepy voices and it would ruin it
the they being Cesare in and hes bit t
did he rupture from too much being b0ned?
they bring him in and show caligari the Cesare and he freaks out
if this were mae nowadays they'd be in love and only did it cuz people disliked em
they straight jacket caligari and loc him in a cell with a triangle door
a triangle has 5 sides
the 3 sides
the top
and bottom
then its back t the realworld wth fransis telling his story
caligari never left his cell again
ten ts revealed they are at the nuthouse
everyones a mental patient
its like being on tumbler
Cesare is there and looking flowers
fransis tells the guy hes tslking to
don't let him tell ur fortune
he goes to the spacy chick but shes nuts too
each of em is in their on world
caligari comes in an hes normal
fransis gos metal and sez he dr is the real insane one
just like tumbler
the dr has I'm straight jacketed
dr sez; he thinks I'm caligari. now I know hw to cure him
so that whole story was fiction and just he delusions of his disturbed mind
that explain why everythings so f'd up
that's how he sees the world
for the cabinet of dr caligari 2 i'd like for a new inmate to come to he nuthouse and start eating pieces of the other inmates. also he eats a piece of the dr. as he has eaten a piece of em, he has access to their memories and can use their insanity to his benefit. turns out, the guy was into he black arts and is haunted by evil forces. and only caligari (who denies the supernatural) can save him by holy items and prayer to fight he demons affecting this guy(as caligari thinks its just a chemical issue and denies the supernatural.

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