Friday, October 21, 2016

The Body Snatcher Review

Note; don't expect good typing
the body snatcher
this is my review on the body snatecher
its got boris Karloff and bela Lugosi
its based on a k by robert louis Stevenson
he also did treasure island
its made by RKO
I liked some of their cr-p
ooh
robert wise did this
now I'm interested
well
more interested
holy cr-p
this was based o a true story
put it on the history channel!
better than the mummy returns!
its set in the distant future year of 1831
well
the future to Genghis khan
like how Robotech is in the distant future year of 2009
its set in Edinburgh
I assume that's England
or a place they took over
like with the Invid regent taking over tirol in Robotech
in a graveyard a guy talks to a dog
it wont leave his masters grave
the mom of the corpse cant afford a "grave watcher"
wtf is dat?
are there rampant necroqueers stealing corpses and b0ning em?
wtf England!!
later boris Karloff comes by and is nice to kids
hes probably a purvo
boris is a cab driver
by cab driver I mean he drives a horse and buggy
\the kid (a little girly) is crippled and is there to see dr macfarland
the spawn guy??
\the girl is there to see him to fix her crippledness
after some rapid fire q/a he asks the girl where her back pain is
she don't know and he gets p-ssed
then a younger man comes in and is nice to the crippled kid
she answers him better than dr spawn\
the dr's look at her back and find she has a nerve growth and needs an operation
and he cant do it cuz hes got better cr=p to do
hes also a teacher and cares more for 1 class than a little girls legs
later the younger dr wants to quit so dr spawn makes him a assistant
bt a chick complains that its gonna f him up
then dr spawn and the chick make out
in the real version they might be b0ning
the dr's talk but notice bela Lugosi working quietly
\dr spawn b--ches at him for not making noise
what a j=rk off!
dr spawn reveals they don't get enough corpses for dissection from the government
laer at night a guy is lurking in a graveyard
h comes to the dr's place and its boris Karloff with a big sack
the young dr helps him
the roung dr is Donald fettis
don fetish?
Donny fetus?
he pays boris for the cropse
later don fetus comes to class to teach and finds the students positioned the display keletons in some mild way
I assume those are real skeletons
like
the movie used real ones for this scene
that's f'd up
then the crippled kid's mom asks for help from don fetish
later the dr spawn is teaching guys with corpses and one jokes
dr spawn goes mental
later the mom from b4 is sad that her sons corpse was swiped and the dog wacked
don fetish wants to quit
dr spawn sez the laws are wrong and if dr's had more corpses they could save more people
that doesn't justify stealing and b0ning corpses
the kid didn't consent to getting his body chopped up and f'd with
later dr spawn is at a bar and the boris Karloff calls him toddy McFarlane
dr spawn don't like it
boris is confident and irritating dr spawn
dr spawn boris Karloff and don fetus talk about the crippled kids surgery and the dr not being good enuff
boris sticks a blade into a loaf of bread and sez toddy wants to to that to him
then sez they are closer than being in the same skin
is this a ref to b0ning?
it sure seems like it
maybe if the real version they were b0ning and that's the thing he had over him
later the dr spawn wants to operate on the crippled kid
the crippled kid wants to see a white horse
also she has no friends cuz she cant walk
that's racist
the chick from b4 talks to dr spawn about not being free of boris Karloff
they make out but b4 they b0ne dr fetus comes in
dr spawn sez he didn't mean to say he'd operate on her
and he needs a new spine to practice on
they ran outta spines
sounds like bad addams family
why not just test on animals?
its safer and cheaper and easier
later dr fat fetish goes to the boris Karloff and sez he needs more corpes stat
but the graveyard is guarded since the dog got wacked
its just a dog man!
in korea they eat those
its like bugers to americans
or whales and octopi in japan
or seals and moose to Canadians
so the boris goes out and wacks a chick
he brngs her over and dr fetus recognizes her
he just saw her
Imagine if he had a thing for her bt she kept turning him down so now that he has her corpse he b0ned it
that would be f'd
he pay the boris and the boris leaves
dr foot fetish tells dr spawn that boris iced a broad
and lugosi hears
dr spawn sez to pretend its ok and wasn't a real murder and that dr fetus is an accessory as he asked boris to get a body
later the drs do surgery and a buncha guys are watching in the same room
hope she don't get infected and rott out
dr spawn sez he wantz no more work with the boris
boris sez hes still gonna come by his place
Lugosi tells Karloff he knows but leaves
dr fetish sez the crippled kid is aling but don't wanna walk
both dr's try to help the kd walk
dr spawn is a hard a55 and dr poop fetish is nice
dr spwn gives up on her
at a bar boris meets dr spawn
dr; you kno something about the HUMAN BODY
boris; I have SOME EXPERIENCE!
me; is that a ref to necrophililia?
boris tells dr spawn that theres things science cant explain
where thoughts come from
how the blood can flow
this is deep
but if you are a creationist it makes sense better
its revealed 2 other dr's got hanged and  a 3rd is retired
I assume from necrophililia
and that boris had something to do with saving someone
at night bela Lugosi goes to see boris Karloff
he reveals to boris he knows about the wackings
if u know hes a killer why are you going into HIS lair alone?!
boris gives him 16 pounds and brandy
hes gonna get him drunk and b0ne him!
he offers to work with bela Lugosi
boris reveals 2 guys killed and sold people to dr knox
knox got off
he tells Lugosi it through song
he wants to show Lugosi how they killed people
so he strangles him
just kick him in the parts!
as bela Lugosi disnt kick boris Karloff in the parts, Karloff wacks him
then he brings Lugosi's body to the dr's place
he goes behind a curtain and we hear noises
I assume he's b0ning bela Lugosi
later, while dr spawn is out drinking, the boris goes to dr spawns chick
dr spawn returns and tells Karloff to gtfo
Karloff sez he's gonna out him
later the dr's find Lugosi in water
dr spawn wants to set it right and dr butt fetish sez he don't wanna go In deeper
dr spawn leaves and the chick reveals how karoff didn't out dr spawn in trial years ago and can out him if needed
later dr spawn confronts the boris Karloff
he offers to make Karloff rich
but Karloff gets sick kicks controlling him
they fight
imagne if they were b0ning eachother and whoever b0ned better won
in other words; MMA
dr spawn plays dead but springs back
later dr spawn brings a body back to his place
he shows the chick its Karloff
later its daylight and dr fetus fetish talks to the crippled girl and her mom
he sez he left dr spawn as he wasn't learning what he wanted
the crippled girl stands and is healed as she wanted to look over a wall to see a white horse
he goes back to tell dr spawn but hes not there
dr spawn sold karloffs horse and tella dr fetus that he "got Karloff to leave Edinburgh"
dr spawn still ants to jack bodies
at night he does so
he puts the body between him and the driver
its  storm ot and dr spawn keeps hearing boris karloffs voice calling him toddy
oh f
fetisis till working with him
he hears the Karloff saying he'd never get rid of him
he chcks the corpse and its boris Karloff
the horse runs and fetis falls out
as the horse rides, karloff's body grabs at him
hey go over a cliff and crash
dr clown fetish finds em and the Karloff is really a chick
we get a quote from some poet or philosopher or w/e
the end
that was pretty good
I liked it being full screen
watch this one if you like 40s horror
for the body snatcher 2 i'd like for some gypsies to have found dr spawn'\s body and used their black magic to revive him. but this was part of boris karloff's plan as his ghost was around the dr and was haunting him. his soul is I the dr;s body and he goes to another part of the country to practice grave robbing and b0ning and eating the bodies. also he tries to change the laws by protest and malcontent uprisings to legalize necromance and says its normal s animals do it too and the dad don't mind as they're dead (like how burgers don't mind being eaten so its not animal abuse). but don fettis (Donnie fetus) is aware of this and fights to defend the rights of the dead.

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