A place where I post silly reviews of various movies from an "everyman" or "contrary" P O V. Done in the style of a newspaper article and a grade school book report. Don't take these seriously. Its all in good fun. Also, each review ends with a crazy sequel idea.
Saturday, February 2, 2019
Being Flynn Review
note; this movie has Robert de niro so its got swearing, b0ning and him being scuzz. also typoes
being Flynn
this is my review on being flnn
its based on a book by nick Flynn who I assume is related to quinton Flynn from bleach
its also got Julie anne moore from that loser movie the shipping news about those inbred Canadians and wes studi from the 90s street fighter movie
its directed by paul weitz who did American Pie, Down to Earth and About a Boy
those sound like p0rn0es
its also got dale dickey and victor rasuk which also sound dirty
is lucy morals in this too?
she was megumi amano in Urotsukidoji
so it starts with de niro saying he's one of the 3 good writers america made with j d salinger and mark twain
no frank Norris or l frank baum?
stan lee and jack kirby had good stuff
hes a taxi driver and has booze in a milk box
then his son nick sez hes telling da story and trying to be a writer
deniro never was there for him as a kid and his mom moore had to raise his a55
later son's gf comes back and finds lipstick by the bed
she throws cr-p at him and he yells, then hes standing in front of a mirror spazzing out
he punches it and sez sorry
then back to eniro who likes kids and animals but not queers and black who try to b0ne his a55
he sez dat
but more swearing
its like south park
as he trys to write but a band downstairs keeps playing
meanwhile, son moves into a str-p club turned home with a gay guy and a black guy
hope his dad don't find out
at the club a guy got shanked there a while ago
1 girl there works at a shelter and offers son work
then de niro taxi's a chick and they go to his place and b0ne for a while
i'd rather see hulk Hogan b0ning than de niro
and I don't like seeing b0ning
then deniro goes to the bands apartment and beats em up with a baseball bat
then deniro calls son and wants to use sons pickuptruck to move out cuz he beat up some guys
he goes there and deniro gets outta the tub naked but we don't see his circimsized weener
a flashback sez deniro was in jail for bad checks and forged checks or w/e as son was a kid
deniro has a baseball bat with nails in it and wants to stuff it up someones a55 and twist it
also he never knew how moore bit it
after moving his cr-p, deniro gives son a Jackson pollock painting which has polliks name misspelled
also hes not keen on the room mates
if he was really awful he'd try to ice em
but he just aint fond of em
kinda archie bunker
also he saves a letter from Viking press saying his work was good
later he complains to the girl about his dad and she offers him work at the shelter
he goes 4 a interview with wes studi called the captain who was a resident there but clawed his way out
he gets put on the fill in list
he gets called in and works with hoboes
1 girl was a h00ker and crackhead who got clean but son sez she'd go back
also son has to deal with drunks and junkies
denoero tries to live with a homie but is turned down
so he lives in his cab and poops at the bus station
later hes driving and blacks out and crashes and it costs him his cab and liscense
later son is working at the shelter and it s-cked
1 guy whizzed himself
he cleans parasites off a guy and later in group reads what he writes about his experiances
he writes like a wrier with stylish words
later he and girl are in a room and she reads letters he wrote with synonyms for drunk
later deniro writes a letter to the president
then deposits a check for 750 000 $ for an advance on his coming novel
I assume its forged
later hes sleeping on a bench and fights a guy over his bag
then he sleeps on a heat grate
later he comes to the shelter and sees son working there
deniro sez son is gathering material for his novel as life is gathering material
also deniro sez hes working on da novel
and sees this as a chance to spend time with him
when talking with his homies, son has a flashback of guys his mom b0ned who raised him a bit
later he gets a letter from dehonoro trying to give him advice
later deniro whines about how all the guys in that shelter and purvoes and cant make it in prison
also is a flashback of moore giving son a wanted picture of deniro to make him not wanna be like him
later his black friend gets him into cocainum
later deniro recalls moore as a good force in his life and sees his rotting face in the mirror and thinks hes 28 and freaks out
eventually son has enough of deniroes cr-p and tells him off and they argue
son wants seniro out
later deniro is going mental, wearing only a towel, p-ssing on the floor, screaming his malcontent ramblings and goes into latin before saying "sucko my c-cko!"
I think that was also his reaction to trump winning
later they vote on getting rid of eniro and son votes to remove his a55
also in a near scene the girl wants son to get treated for drugs and alcohol
is this turning into intervention??
he goes upstairs and sees people smoking crack
and he joins in
remember what street fighter and primal rage taught us in the 90s!
winners don't use drugs!!
also also is a scene of moore writing a suicide note to son and blowing her brains out
imagine if she stuck the gun up her a55 and blew her head open!!
so son finds her later and out of flash back he wakes up and drinks
I assume the crackheads b0ning his mouth while he was on drugs
later deniro comes in and they wont let him in for 2 months
he plays a guilt attack on son and sez e could've j-rked off and flushed him down the toilet
is this a "don't j-rk off" moral for the kids?
later girl as enough of son and dumps his crack smoking a55
later denoro works as a human billboard for a tax company
I know a guy who did that and he didn't mind
later when deniro is sh-tting in a construction site some homies come in and beat up a hobo he was just with
son is in a group for his addiction but the people there are far worse than him and he's f'd by it
later in a coffee shop a chick tells him eniro was sleeping in a paking garage and some thugs working for the owner old him upsidedown off the top floor of it and tell him not to come by
son goes out and finds a guy named moses whith a switchblade
he stabs him in the parts a buncha times and whats left of em fall out in a choppy mess on the floor
jk
he really gets him in from the cold
later he finds denito and brings him to live at his place
in a few days he can return to the shelter and the roommates are out but deniro dont wanna go back
son sez he was writing a story about his mom working 2 jobs and trying to be there 4 her son
but didn't finish as she found it b4 he wrote about her love
deniro sez dat didn't drive her to seppuku and thinking why she stuck around so long is better than why she ate her gun
hes not so bad wen given the chance to shine to say something like that it shows
next day denioro goes asks why son never asked him to stay with him b4
son sez if u try to save a drowing mabn u might get pulled under
deniropo sez hes a survivor and so is son and but son is not him or something
months later son goes off on his own thing and sez bye to girl
he goes back to school, gets a degree, gets work teaching poetry and still gets letters from deniro
deniro gets an apartment and son visits him
deniro is doing well but goes on a cathilocphobic, homophobic, pedophoboic, blackphobic tirade
son shows deniro a poetry book he wrote
1 poem is him snapping of denirpes fingers to stop him from drinking
deniro shows him his writings and it s-cked
later son does his poetry reating and deniro shows up 4 it
also son shows deniro his black wife and kid
deniro hold the kid but the kid hates him
it sensed his ki
then deniro sez son gets the last word
then credits
the end
this was make in soviet new York and had help from an aids clinic
gotta say, this was well made
seeing deniro go mental was fun
good story based o a real guy
its kinda cool and bummer with the blue colors and guys being dinks
but its got heart and good stuff in it to
I liked it
for being Flynn 2 I want deniro to have a mental episode and start going around attacking people and stealing their kidneys. turns out, he's being controlled by some daemon and it needs the organs to revive in this world. also its a platform action game on sega genesis super Nintendo and Atari jaguar where you play as him and take guys out and make their guts into items to get across stuff
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