Saturday, May 1, 2021

The Spy Who Came In From The Cold Review

 Note: i can spell good when i wanna, but its more fun this way

The Spy Who Came In from the Cold

this is my review on The Spy Who Came In from the Cold from 1965

its directed by martin ritt who did sounder

it stars richard burton and no one else i know

in nevewr xaw this b4 but heard its good

its bassed on a book i never read by some frenchie

so after credits to soft piano its the gate crossing of ther berlin wall bvefore reagan took it out with his americanism

the boundary between freedom and communism

so burton is waiting for someone at the gateway to h e double ussr and the guy hjes waiting for might have been caught by a commie chasing him

its in widescreen and b/w

burton walks by the boarder and 2 soviet guards are there armed

and if the soviets attack, they can't fight back or it'll be war

like how n soviet england and canada guns are banned so onlyu bad guys have enm

a guy walx a bike through da czech poine and the alarm goes off

da sovierts attack him and he rides his bike as they ice him

later burton chatz with a britmo who sez he knows everyones fate but its not his jobn to tell burton

at a brit place, burton meeets his boss and boss drinks tea cuz hes too devolved for pop

so bos is gonna reassign burton and has a speecch of how his side is said to be peaceful but really both r bad

so boss wantsa burton to find mundt, the guy chasing the guy who got it at the start

so later burton is at a job hiring thing and gets sent to assist at some place

he worx at a library for 11 brittish money a week and goes out to bars fore lunch

then its raining cuz its cr-ppy weather in soviet england and he goes to a store with a guy cutting meat on a salicer

imagne putting a guys face on it?

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!

or his a55!

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

so burto trys to buy something but needs a bvankers thing

also the brits are reoreganiziung the library and use queerr words like metamorphosis for a werewolf book or aparations for phantoms

so he goes home with the chick working there and they have coffee and its revealed they don't believe in The Lord

she reveals shes a commie and think they are gonnado good with it

Stalin, MaO, pOL pOT, cASTRO, tRUDEAU,all thought to do good, but did evil

look at all the people who fought and died to get into the ussr over the berlin wall

oh wait!

so later burtron goos ito da store for fake caviar and is drunk and p-ssed off

he beats out the store owner (stoner) and later is let outta prison and meets the commie chick

dont drop the soap

she invites him to her place for wine and fish

theres 2 kinda commies

the idealistic "everyuone willbe equal and happy"

and the realistic "imma use thius to gain power/control"

later in the park a commie trys to seduce him to working for the reds

they go drinking as thats what soviets are known for, and offers him cash to meet him at 7 30 t night

so after going around town for a while to music and meets a higher up who sez he wanted burtn to look like he's f;d and drunk but not to defect but now they'[ll use him to leave "evidence" they want out to the commies to lure out mundt

also hes ordered to not be with the cmmie chick

so at a bar burton meets guys who dont getta long with him

then meets another guy who wants him to out britmo secrets to the commies

but both are bad guys!its like if gacy and bundy were fighting!

so later he's with commie chick and talk about leaving jail

if this were made today he'd be b0ning the girl instead of talking

wait, they kissed and tit fades out

they b0ned

so later burton goes to the netherlands (likte the netherworld in yugioh 5ds?) and metts a ghuy who goes over his life story

burton sez he worked on stuff about the code names of agents and tells em about operation rolling stone, which he sez is a banking thing

burtton b--ches bout work and how he hates da brits side and a paper sez burton is missing in soviet england

he realizes they leaked his info and are gonna sneak him to soviet union and wants his cash and out but they wont let him go

mr smily meets commie chick and gives her his card saying he's the burtons homie

later threy go to somr sh-t house in a cr-pmobile area and 1 guy there was a nazi b4 turning commie

burton gets b--chy but 1 guy yells at him for being a traitor and they'll pay him and let him go when he gts em good info as all he gave em is cr-p

he tells the guy, a german i think, that mudnt was wortking for england

he tells german he don't believe in anything and they talk about how innocents die all the time and they dont care

so later commie chick wants to go to east germany and support the commies like aoc or bernie

so in sh-tland german guy sez theres evidence saying mundt was let outaa england and burton sez it wouldnt happen w/o him knoing of it

so later burton is in a room with some guys who probably beat/b0ned him and they take him upstairs

he's interrogated and the guy doing it in mundt but the commies come in and take em to a secret trtial

they try to prove that burton is not a spy and mundt is

huh, the commie chick was in the kings speech andn clash of the titans

so ther trial gives evidence and commie chick is called up as a witness and is not told whos on trialor why

its revealed a house was bought for her but she wont say who did it or admitting she knew smily

nico smily from yugioh arc v? that show s-cked!

she eventually admits it was smily who did it and this proves the evidence agianst mundt was false as smily was a gov guy

burtton admits its all fake and german guy gets b--chy cuz he also hates mundt

so burton goes and chick are arrested and back at the sh-t house

mundt tells thm he is a brtimo guy and is letting em go

thery drive in the car and burton sez to chick his mission was to save mundt and get the german who hates him iced as he was suspecting mundt of being a birtworker

and the brits used her to discredit burton and were to sacrifice them once the job was done

burton goeds on a speech about howe spys s-ck and they do awful things for the people they are fighting for

they meet a guy who looks like sean culllen andf he guides em to a place to get through and how to get through it

they get to the wall but sean cullen j fk's the chick and siumily sez to jump to the west german side

seeing how the brits are no better thsan commies, he gpoes back  as sean cullen tells him to go on

then sean cullen picks him of and the movie ends

the end

that was f'd

well done

kinda artsy

kinda offbeat like a 60s film with camera work and filming style like them

its pretty good but dark and depressing

shows how awful the brits and commies weere

shows the dangers of both comminusm and england

where as america is tyhe good guys who fights those evils

its well made and quirky aND TELLS A TWISTED STORY WITHOUGH MUCH SWEARING OR VIOLENCE OR B0NING

i likeed it but its pretty dark and bleak

then again i like go nagai and urotsukidoji

for The Spy Who Came In from The Cold 2 i want it to be the 80s and england has teamsed up with the ussr to take on america after the communist party has been voted in. lso they use exosuits to fight in the dried up seas asfter the nucular war. also america is using espers to use their powers to microwave enemy units. its also a 16 bit srps on sega genesis, snes, tg166, atari jaguar and gba where you play as an american and fight the soviets like in shining force and in the end take on the queen who has a daemonic transformastion by absorbing the souls of the brits who  fell loyal to her.

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