Taggart Review

 Note: I spell taggeriffic

Taggart

This is my review on Taggart  from the disant future year to D W Griffith, of 1964 (20 years before Transformers G1)

Its directed by R. G. Springsteen who did nothing I saw

It stars Tony Young fropm the 60s star trek, Dan Duryea from Scarlet Street, Sal Mineo from Rebel Without a Cause/Giant/Exodus/The Greatest Story Ever Told/Escape from the Planet of the Apes/Stranger On The Run, Elsa Cardenas from Giant, Jean Hale from My Favorite Martian, Emile Meyer from Shane/Blackboard Jungle/The Man with the Golden Arm/A Time for Killing/More Dead Than Alive, Tom Reese from The Greatest Story Ever Told/Support Your Local Sheriff!/North Dallas Forty/da 60z The Twilight Zone, David Carradine from Kill Bill: Volume 1\Kill Bill: Volume 2\Kung Fu: The Legend Continues\Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman\Lizzie McGuire\Jackie Chan Adventures\King of the Hill\Danny Phantom/Young Billy Young/Celebrity Ghost Stories, Peter Duryea from the 60s Star Trek, Ray Teal from Sergeant York/The North Star/Captain Kidd/My Favorite Brunette/The Snake Pit/Samson and Delilah/the 1950 No Way Out/Along the Great Divide/Ace in the Hole/The Indian Fighter/The Guns of Fort Petticoat/Inherit the Wind/One-Eyed Jacks/Judgment at Nuremberg/Chisum, Claudia Barrett from White Heat/Robot Monster/Seven Ways from Sundown, Stuart Randall from Tomahawk/The Ten Commandments, Peter Mamakos from The Ten Commandments, Arthur Space (Which is his real name) from The Cockeyed Miracle/Tomahawk/the 50s A Star Is Born/The Shakiest Gun in the West/The Swarm/Dennis the Menace/Little House on the Prairie, Harry Carey Jr. from Red River/Blood on the Moon/Gentlemen Prefer Blondes/The Searchers//The Rare Breed/Billy the Kid Versus Dracula/Big Jake/Cahill U.S. Marshal/The Shadow Riders/Gremlins/Mask/The Whales of August/Back to the Future, Part III/The Exorcist III/The Rifleman, William Henry from The Alamo/The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance/How the West Was Won, and some guys I never saw or aint on back door, candy a55, beta male, soy boy, aids bag, weener cleaner, gender offender, sodom bottom, cripple nipple hippie vegan stoner peta tree kung fu based on plants wikipedia, who thinks oj didnt ice anyone but sez The Right Honorable Lee Harvey Oswald did despite neither being found guilty

i never saw this but its baeed on a book i never read by openly french Louis L'Amour who wrote Hondo/Apache Territory/The Shadow Riders

Alsio its david carradine's 1st film

So after title and credits to eidescreen and color we see a cattole ranch and a fam happ on it starting their home there with things going well

their son comes back and mentions a man whos mad at the fam moving onto land he wants even though its gov land and son wants guns to defend themselves and more men

bad guy ben comes by who wants the land and starts a stampede by firing at em and capping the farmahnds

the son fires back andsafter the stampede his dad is in h-ll and  1 guy in a black hat attacks his mom so he goes to save her but is shot

mom spazzes out and he caps her as she whips her and wait, his dads not iced but was shot and he treis to get him to the drand wait i think thers 2 sons and this one is blonde

dad gets help and dr is amazed hes alive and sez to sherrif to leave his boy alone and sherrfi leaves

k so it turns out the dark haired guys dad was the settler on the land and the blonde guy is the one who capped the mom and son nd is ben or bob or w/es son

dark hair challeneged blonde and caps him drawing faster and bob sees and sherrif sez to get outta town or he'd get iced and  retires to bob or ben whos called blazer and is the dad who ot capped

So dark haired hero buried his fam and 40s music plays  and he rides off and wait its a new guy named j jason who meets him at the river tending his head wound and is freindly but dark hero dont want it

jj wants to know if hes on the right road and is told it is and wow we're like 20 mins in already, that felt like nothing, with adds

dr sez if ben rests and isnt excited  he might make it and jj comes in and ben shows em his goons and tells him he wants taggart iced or icing his sons and taggart is the main guy

ben offers 5000$ for the trio if they ice taggot and jj goes with it but wonders if ben is gonna bite it if he'd get paid

ben sez he has a reward for taggot dead or alive and when dr sez to get out jj slugs him and gets a description of taggot and jj and goons go out for it

so at this bar this chick wants to be a dancer and shows her legs and the bar is owned by a mexico whos doing cr-ppy

so she comes back in a skimpier outfit and sez her ranch was attacked by apaches and she came here and needs like 30$ and dark hari hero gives her it and she eventually accepts

so jj and his goons come in for taggot and chick draws their eyes and he gets em at gunpont from behind and gets out and mexico fires the chick

main guy is outside and 1 goon comes after him and gets it and main guy drives off in the apache tarrietory and jj thins they will wack him

the apache attack and and jj and hero hep this fam fight em off and after that jj takes the fam chick captive and gets hero to surrender

jj takes the fams guns and when he reveals he wants to bring in taggotfor the money, the fa drives between em and main guy egts away

the other goon is wounded by the indians attack and taggot has no horse or gun and  this gun comes or him

he grabs it and throws the user but its a blondish chick and she's unsure and later her dad comes by and gets taggot at gunpoint and brings em to the base where a bucket of rocks falls as an alarm

moustache dad is uneasy about him being there and they bring em to a home hidden away as a prisoner wih this mexico chick there who;s  moustache dads 2nd wife

jj and goon go on and goon is f'd out and fals off his horse and jj capa him so he dont gotta worry if he comes back for him

hes been kinda chatty and fun but here he shows hes evil, like a disney villian

although punching the dr was a tip, but some drs got it commin

so later mexico chick wants to leave with main guy as she fears the apqche and thinks her husband is too decroded to do it

se tries seducing him, which theres a commandment against, buthe dont consent and she wants a younger man like a gender swapped leonardo decaprio or hgh heffner

blonde comes by and confronts mexico over seeing taggot at night but mexico sez she wont out her to dad as it might hurt him

he deserves better, not some aids spreading 5kank like those 2020s singer chicks singing of b0ning guys in soviet california

so he sez if she gives him a horse and a gun he'd be gone but she dont wanna work with him and goes off

man we're like an hour in, that felt like nothing, with adds

so main guy sneaks out but sees an apache attacks and saves moustache dad from it and shanks the apache and moustache dad now likes taggot

moustache dad shows taggot this gold mine with 50% pure gold and is gettng it for his mexico and wants to buy her happiness as he dont give her romane and i think thats 50s for he's got a lip d0ng

they get sacks of gold so its gold man sacks and they go back to protect the chix from apache but find jj and disarm him at gunpoint

jj hts on blonde chick and thinks tagot is into the chick andis brought in where he hits on mexico and moustache dad sends her upstairs

tagot sez jj wants him for a reward and jj shows the wanted thing for him but moutache dad dont like killing for profit

also jj got here hearing the rock bucket fall andcuz theres apaches around they gotta stand guard

at nighthero stands guard and sez apace dont attack at night and they get ready to book it

blonde trusts him more tan the wanted thing warrent for his arrest and mexico starts trying to seduce jj and he uses it to lure her in and she tells him of her husbands gold mine

he gets freed by her and when she goes out she meets moustache dad who she tries to keep off but the bucket of rocks falls and he goes to dark haired hero in defense mode

later its day ad the apache attack from the jungle or rees or woods or w/e and moustache dad gets capped but they get him in and fight off the apache

they reveal that jj and mexco left and he claims thatjj made her so they go to a fort thinking thats where jj and mexico will go

outside mexico wants to be with jj andhe sez her ma bit it so shes free

blonde thinks jj didnt force mexico and that if he sees jj that 1 wuill fall jt he sez some cowoy stuff that alpha males say about doing what you gotta do

so latwr mexico dont wanna be with jj anymore like kim karashian dumping the guy she married for a bigger blacker guy after 2 months, so cuz she sed they'd be togeyher all the life, he starts strangling the 5ank, which in the real version might be b0ning her dead like the eye guy in A Serbian Film

then apache attacks and jj books it with da gold and the apache swatm around em as the wagons circle and a fire arrow gets the wagon wiryh mexco in it

shes not fully dea and getsut and when a guy tries to get her back, he gets it

she keeps runing guys, but thakfully an arrow gets her in da back, like kim kardashian and her end by butt problems, and she looks like kim kardashians mom

so jj gets away anddark harired hero in attack modecomes across he massacred people and sees mexico's body

he returns like universal soldier 2 and sez he didnt find her and takes a different path to avoid em but tells blonde mexico was iced by apache, which i think they b0ned and/or ate her, probably at the sae time like in devilman crybaby with the guy b0ning a guy and eating him as he devolves into a daemon

so at the fort jj gets tere and sez the apache are comming and he wants fresh hodes to get the f outta there and that the calvery and civilians got iced

they make him stay and fight and the hero and mouatache dad and blonde arrive asking for his wife but they say they didnt see em

dark hair hero synchro summon tells army guy the guys woman is in h-ll and hedont know andthe apache attack ansthe Americans use cannons to blow em

moustache dad fnds jj and asks where his woman is but jj attacks a wounded man

blonde comes outand sez cr-p i cant here but somehow my mom did and sed to take care of mexico, then bites it

the apache break in but the calvary came in and saved em and chaed out the apache

jj attacks hero but hero wastes jj and sends him to h-ll with his mexican woman and walks to the blonde

the end

that was pretty good

some charm, wit, heart, edge and drama

good music and acting and the bad guy had charisma hile being evil like ivan ooze in power rangers

main guy had a deep voie like lee marvin but seemed too oung for it

nice advancement and it didnt drag and had good flow

i liked it, it told a cool story

plus the mexican chick being bad was a good twist

For Taggart 2 I want the dad blazr to have gotten desparate and had steamounk tech built into his body t keep him alive and go hunting the main guy in the 1st one. Also the main guy has trained in kung fu and can now use 120% of his bodies full power and has Ki Blasts. Also its a 16 bit platformer like Castlevania Bloodlines on Sega Genesis, Snes, TG16, Atari Jaguar, and GBAwhere you play as either the Hero and figtht across 1800s America to find and beat the shero, or as the hero and do the opposite route in levels in reverse ordr to find the blazer cyboeg dad.