The Frozen North Review

Note: i spell Canadian by not with extra u's

The Frozen North

Thi Is My Review On The Frozen Nirth from the distant future year to American Hero John Wilkes Booth of 1922(100 years before Robotech II The Sentinels)

Its directe by Buster Keaton who did Our Hospitality/Sherlock Jr./The Navigator/Seven Chances/Go West/The General/ The Cameraman/Steamboat Bill Jr, an also doreceetec by Edward F. Cline who did The Scarecrow/The Electric House/Captain January

It stars Buster Keaton from Coney Island/he Scarecrow/he Electric House/he Balloonatic/ur Hospitality/herlock Jr./even Chances/he General/he Cameraman/Sunset Boulevard/Around the World in 80 Days/The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn/It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World/The Twilight Zone/Steamboat Bill Jr, Joe Roberts from The Scarecrow/The Play House/The Electric House/Our Hospitality, Sybil Seely from The Scarecrow/Sailor-Made Man, Freeman Wood from The Coward, Edward F. Cline from The Scarecrow/The Electric House/Captain January, and 1 chick not on back door, aids bag, banana crammer, cripple nipple, Sodom bottom, soy boy, beta male, gender offender, queer as a deer with a steer in its rear, hippie vegan stoner mpeta tree kung fu baded o plants, Wikipedia who dont have a page on max bielas but does on mariah carry sayng " dony know her"

this was made to mock William s hart, not kevin hart who's obnoxoiopus, andhow back door billie attacked the right honorable Roscoe Arbuckle over false accusations he b0ned a h00ker dead

I never even heard of back door billy hart til looking up this movie but like Buster and Roscoe, so history decides who really won

billy was butt hurt over this and didn't talk to Buster for years after rhis was made

It parodies Erich Von Stroheim who was a Cstholic and h-his film Foolish Wives but he liked it

I never saw this but was watching that Twilight Zone ep wirh Keaton and looking him up to see if its him on soviet wikiedia had me fin this film

afte title we see buster coming ot from a subway to a snowy wasteland in a western town with roulete  and having 2 guns

he sees a poster for ammo and guts the guy on it off, puts it in the window and sez "hands up" then comes in and taes heir gns and throws em outaide then the money

a guy noticis the guy in the window with a bandanna over his fave like a beta wearing a mask or a gaijin who's god tells em to, is a cut out and bings it in o show em

buster puts the money back and leaves as the casino thriws him out the winow and we walks off to a cabin with a living human adult male and a living human adult female in love and cr-ppily cries with fake tears as a jab at bac k door billy who was a wooden actor

Buster pulls his gun and blows em out for no reason like its a Go Nagai Manga and checs the bodies and sees this isn't his home or wife and he capped e for cheeting on hm

he goes home and his woman comes oto him but he pushes her away and dont wanna b0ne her so she screams an a Mountie hers em and comes

she pushes a thing and a pot falls on her head and KO's her but he don't gie a f and ignores her brain damaged body

the Mountie knocks so buster puts on a record and fakes dancing with her limp body so he comes in w/o a warrent and sees em  so he leaves

buster dumps her body on the floor like the sack of boar cr-p she is and ees a chick outside so he puts on a wite suit lie a mafia guy with a p-m cane and goes to her and pulls out a flower on the ground

a female seems bummed with a guy in a big coat and a guy on a dog seg comes by and coat man goes but buster is  there like a horror movie

heh heh heh, you said butt buster

so buster holds the flower behind his ack and it catches fire on a candle and when he shows it to her he drops it and they stomp it out

he teies winning her over and coat guy returns and kicks buster in the a55 and buster gets p-ssed, which is rare as es the great stone face and this shows he was a great actor

they leave him in their home where if he was today he'd sh-t it up but he leaves and snow falls on him from the roof and he pulls out

this big guy is there and he wants to follow the couple andthe couple leaves and big guy gets in a big a55 sle an has a bunca cr-ppy dogs pll it and run off as the roe falls from it

buster gets in a sleigh taxi and its not crazy taxy by sega and they go after the couple

the couple gets to their destination and sends the dog sle on as buster goes  on in rhe sleigh and a guy in some kinda sled with a fan on the back like a steampunk snowmobile goes after em

h sop ahead of em and gives em a letter an buster takes off the fan, flips it and puts it back soits in reverse

the sleigh goes on and the snowmobiler goes after em but reverses and goes in te ice water to probably die

buster and big guy get to an igloo anfthe sleigh f==s apart and big guy plays banjo or guitar as buster falls back and busts the wall

busters a baa55 to take the cold

big guy goes oyt in snow shoes and buster uses guitars on his feet as macguuver snow shoes

why were there 2 guitars??

they go to a lake and buster takes off his gyuitars and uses a getter tomahawk to us a hole in thr ices a55 and stomps it to fall in bt get ouyt

he goes ice fishing with sardines by another guy not far off and uses saedins as bait and pills out the guys fish and then both figt over the same thinguntil buster pills him under the ice and pulls his a55 out

buster goes off on snow shows bit the guy throws snowballs at him so he uses his snowshoe as a tennis racket and sends him off but sees it was a big black bear the guy ran from

buster goes back and theres a dog around and kicks the big guy in his big aa55 and hears sweeping so he walks back to where his wife was an ooes in

he hears the coat guy coming an he bars the doorwith his arm but is on the wrong  side and the coat guy opens it and comws in

coat guy chaes buster and he escapes out the highwr window so coat guy runs out but mosses buster who's got snow o his back and buster goes in

woman sees buster as a Spanish war guyan he runs to her as we cut away and see big guy on flopy skiis come by and fave coat guy who throws gim ff a cliff

coat guy comes bak and sees bste with a fake eard or fae wig and pulls a knife  and they struggle bt wife i think comes b and wait she just looks lik her, and shoots buster through the window in the back like that Luigi commie did to the ceo he was jealous of and broke the commanments gaiat coveing your neighbors a55 and thou shalt not murder and love your neightbor as yourself

buster pulls a gun and i reveals its a movie and buster slept through it in an empty theatre like Little Nemo, which explains him killing those people

the end

that was pretty fun

its like under 20 mins and a good parody of movies i never saw

people at the time loved it an i enjoyed it

its got good jokes an gags and stunts and is creative and fun

Buster showed good acting and good bad acting to mock a cr=ppy actor and has real range

you can feel the anger in his face an hear it in his voiceless voice

its bada55 with his wacking those people for mo reason and makes sense as its a dream an we all kill pople in dreams

it feels lonher than it is bt the ending sneaks up on you

I liked it and its a fun entertaining comy

For The Frozen North 2 I want him to fall asleep in a shakesepeare play and go through various mixes of shakesepraare stories and waste the charactrs with guns. Also its a 16 bit Run N Gun Game on Sea Genesis, Snes, TG16, Atari Jaguarand GBA where 1 player is Buser Keaton and the other Player is Roscoe Arbuckle and you fight a mishmash of Shakesepear cr-p and in the end, fight Shakesepeare who's towering over you and takes up much of the screen, but after you beat him, the REAL author of his books is the final boss.