Alone In The Dark Review

 note; i spell faaerk i mean dark

alone in the dark

this is my reciew on Alone In Rhe Dark from the distant future year to lillian gish of 2005, the year of transformers the movie and some robotech comics

its based on a video game i never played and is said to be one of the worst movies ever

Its directed by Uwe Boll who did House of the Dead/Postal which I liked

it stars Christian Slater from The Wizard/Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves/Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country/FernGully: The Last Rainforest/Interview with the Vampire/austin powers 01/Hard Rain/Zoolander/Windtalkers/Moses in the 00s animated The Ten Commandments that I never  saw, Tara Reid from A Return to Salem's Lot/Urban Legend and ther Sharknado films, Stephen Dorff from Blde 01/FeardotCom/Immortals/Married... with Children/Blossom/Father Dowling Mysteries, Frank C. Turner from Warcraft/20`12/hot rod/Scary Movie 3/MVP: Most Valuable Primate/Ernest Rides Again/Unforgiven/The Grey Fox/The New Addams Family/Honey, I Shrunk the Kids: The TV Show/The Adventures of Shirley Holmes, Matthew Walker from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventures, Mike Dopud from Maximum Overdrive/Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever/X2/Spider-Man 3/Postal/Rise of the Planet of the Apes/Tasmanian Devils/X-Men: Days of Future Past/the 2014 Godzilla, Françoise Yip from Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem//The Unauthorized Saved by the Bell Story/RoboCop: Prime Directives, Mark Acheson from Weird-Oh's/ tthe 00s He Man/ The 00s fantastic 4/My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic/Transformers armaxa, enertgon and cybertron/Black Lagoon, Darren Shahlavi from watchmen/3300//PostaL, Brendan Fletcher FROM aIR bUD 0001/Freddy vs. Jason/Ginger Snaps Back: The Beginning/Goosebumps/The Adventures of Shirley Holmes(HE WAS stink?>!)/The Crow: Stairway to Heaven/Caitlin's Way/Flashpoint, and a few i never saw in anything

people hated this but i like cr-p so maybve its for me?

so without any warmning, we get scrolling text and narration of a lost american civilization found by mine woprkers in 67

they saw there were 2 worlds, a light and dark, like zelda or yugioh GX, and 10 000 years aGO, OPENED A GATE between em but something came through and the trtibe vanished leaving a few artifacts that talk of dark monsters in attack mode that want the gaste opened again

da gov sttarted a thing to look into this as i gguess lbj didnt have enough evil to do after hiring the grassy gnoll guy and the director or archelogy lionel hutz i mean hudgens started collecting artifacts and was later shut down

me made a lab in an ex gold mine, like the fallen angels claiming to be gods wanted humans to mine for giold in real life, and tried fiusing kids with the monsters and the survuivirs are now wantoimng to nbe awakened and are lost souls

then we see a guy lightly jogging in the woods as flashlight guys look for him

then 22 years ago, lionel gets e nun to give him kids to save the human race and to tell the cops the kids vanished

but a black guy sez 1 kid is missing and this bworn haired bworn eyed White kid is hiding in a power thing

da cops come and nun sez the kids vanished then we se the kid seeing cgi monsters in his eye

tyhen slater wakes up and a kid on da plane hes on sez theres nothing to be afraid of in da dark and slater sez there is

on a boat in da sea is dr and geting soime item from it like zelda phantom hourglass and saez someones coming in

then slater sez narrating that there a supernatural world we train outselves not to see and we all have a natural fear of da dark that protects us

and if you cant see something, it can still ice u

at 10 he lost his memory at the orphanatrium and is here to protect people from things

he takes a cab with stink from shirly homes and sez hes a paranormal investigator and theres cabs following em

so he has stink drive bad to losde em in soviet canada but they bump his cab

stink used swear words! nooooo!

the chaser slams his car into the side of stinks car and slater gets out and chaser climbs a fencer like spider man

then comes down and hammers slaTER WHO KICKS HIM THROUGH A GLASS WINDOW

THEY FIGHT IN A BUILDINGNAND CHAser beats his head on da floor and takes an item slater had but slater gets it back and runs while taking a cops gun

slater caps the guy in the tors=o which fdoes nothing and no one notices, but does it again and now pewople freak out

after a 3rd shot, they fight in an ice place and slater hits do little so chaser strangles him badly, but slater shanks his chest with a metal thing

at a museum tatra gets an artifact from the civilization thats for the dr and in da sea, drn gets this thing hes been looking for for years

in some city, slater nnotices something and goes in a building where he gets an answeering maching saying a guy had nightmares again

he looks at the thing he got and in sea at niht, they have the thing up

its made of gold and dr sez the natice guys were da 1st to use gold and it contained evil spirut

slater examinines his thing and it extends like a tleescope and he chesks the computer and on da boat, the captain beats out dr and opens da box  as he wants it

slaters head spazzes and this balck guy wakes up and other people activate into some trance and walk out

captain gets an axe and comes out to find the crew chopped up and da box open

he opens a secret part and gets an item in it and i'm not sure how hes getytoujgn back unless he knows how to man a boat, whish he might not as he had captain and crew to do that

at the unit theres reading of something and at the muesum the dr calls tara and tells her not to f with the stuff

slater has flashbacks lightning quiuck and da next dayy wakes up and the wife of a guy sez her man is gone

slater narrates that to surcive in the dark world, the people fused with mnsters but lost their humanity but got power, like the chaser, and he fears it happened to the guys who spazzed out

he meets the wife and sez hes gonna find her man and calls some guy about his childhood friend vanishing

then goes to the orphanaruim and the nun looks the same as she did 20 years ago

he sez somethigns up with him and the guy and then is at his lair looking up missing guys online

then narrates he was in the unit at 20 and learned a lot but left as he knew they wouldnt help him

also its unit 713 like the alleged camp 731 of japan

he meets a guywho gives him data on the guys who vanished and theyy were from the same orphanarium

the guuy he got indfo fromis from the 713 and he goes to see tara who slugs him for thinking he was dead afetr a hug

imagine if a guy did that to a girl for p-ssing him off?

he sjhows her this item he found in chile from 6 months of work and she sez its from 10 000 years ago like atlantis in yugioh or the dark signers in yugioh 5Ds

also creation science has proved the earth is 6000

a guard ssees something and ghoes in this area of ancient idols that are probably cursed

the lights arew out and tara and clater look around nd eventually this cgi monster uses its soiked tentacle on the graids head and b0nesv  outr his mouth

later slater and tara find  him and hear it and run as it busts the exibits

they hide in a room anbd a wood door keeps it out as it attacks so sslater caps it and it goes

then army guys bust in da ceiling windowsand come in and when the thing jumps out, they fire on it

also its sometimes inbcvisible

so dorf i think comes in and his laptop scans the area and its clear andslater wants to know whats up

dorf sez its classifiedand has slater removed but slater took a passkeyy card and meeets up with tara fior like 15 secondds and goes off

slater sees in the autopsy thing on the guy he iced and autopsy guy sez he was an agent and has something fused to his soine

its like a centipede and f';d  his nervous system and aa  scanner detects something on slater

dr comes back somehoww andtalks with tara about this image she has from slater and this chick cop interrupts

he goes offf and sez they found jack sh-t on the trip

coproner sez slater has a parasite in him but his electro shock he had as a kid killed it

then dr gets a blood samnple from this thing in a cageand injects himself wiithnit

this is going resident evil

coroner sez 713 treacted these things and theyy are weak to platnium gold and other things as it f's its abbility to f electricity

1 scanner is given to slater and certail light like the sun is fatal in large doses

also is a spercialk bullet of resin or w/e slater wants more of that cuts through em like cr--p through a goose

the chaser and  monster at the muesm were after the item at da museum andwhoever controls em might send more

coroner looks up the chaser and is called in to da commander and tara goes to see chaliterin his lair but as hes sleepinggoes through his cr-p

dortf is commandr andgriills coroner for seeing slater and will fire hij if he holds ouut infgo on slater

then tara b0nes slater for no reason to music like in da room except he dont go in her belly button

at coroners home his woman goes somnewjhere and he finds her iced, then dr sstrangles him and a centipede thing goes in his mouth and possesss him

the stomach dont lead to the spine!

and if it ate throuigh the organs, he'd die!

this is NOT anatomy!

mifght as well have it go in his a55

so tara finds a pattern on some map and the lights spazz out AND THE BLACK GUY WHO VANISHED ATTACKS SLATER

MORE GUYS COME AND f off caps lock! suck an aids b0ner! so tara caps a few and takles em out easy despirte slater having toruble wiith that chaser

they run and the chi monster attacka nd i gott asay, looks kinda cool

slater shreds it with a machine gun and it poofs into dust like zelda the phantom hourglass and  his black friend is dead now too

then a rock video of army guys firing at the monsters in the dark and it taking em out

so after hge monster are beat, dorf and his crew find slater and tara and wants to arrsts slater

theres  anoise and in the chaos, slater gets aweayubut snmipers a posessed chick who is gonna ice dorf

after ending more controlled peopleand cool gore, the scanners say its clear

wait, whgy didnt the scanner detect the possessed coming at them b4?

so dorf needs their helpto find coroner and dr and tyhere a copper ride where its said dr was in charge of an ivestifation or something, i dont know, its hard to hear

at this place is a generator being brought on and btw this is pretty widescreen and it does have color but not as bright as the 90s or as filthy as the 10s

i think theyy are in a lab or something or where dr did his cr-p

so the power still isnt on and dorf and guuys go in this tunnel thats actual matter on fiom instead of green screen cr=p

they find a dead end and look into it but then the generator gets the lights on

in this dead end is some kinda ring like a stargate in that movie i never saw and suddenly da floor gioves out and a guy falls in a hole in da earths a55

then dr sends all thse cgi monsters out to attack the humans and its kind of a cool shot and coronoer pulls a grenade on generator guy and g=blows them both to h e double soviet california

so eventually the monster sget to da base and the soldiers open fire and this is a lot like shadow the hedgehog on gamecube

so slater and dorf are going down the hole on a latter i mean ladder and at da botom i think the ladder hole closes

theres writing on the wall in stone in some symbols that tara can read saying if ur here alive, ur already dead

Nani?! ohhh! Hidebuuuuu!

so tiopdside the monsters are taking out the huamsn and choppers and in da hole this crippled by the faal chick is bit by a snake thing

they shoot the sand and, wait, how is this so well lit?!

so asian crippled chick bites it and topside the humans have pulled back and 2 soldiers are wandering aroudn w/o monsters

so i guess the monsters are done, wait, 1 soldier is firing on 1 and the guys in da hole are using a charge to blow the wall

they go in the wall and its a misty place with i thiunk plants hanging from the ceiling

1 topside soldier sees this chick who's head was f'd open and is apazzing out

its pretty brutal and most kovies are too candya55 to show that, exp with real matter instead of a cg head

so da team in da hole finds a lab with beds and slkaters name on 1

he realizes 713 implanted em with it and slater reads the unit was trying to stiop somehting they created

they find behind a moving wall thing and a glass thing, a wall that has a nucular symbol groove they can put the item slater has

he dont use it, but dr is somehow in there with a gun and takes out a guy with aheadshot like j fk or harambe

dr sez slater was why the gov shut him down and he spend 20 years looking for the itema nd wants it

tara givces it and he dont ice them for some reason an dopens da door but slater trhows a knife in him like grant in castlevania 3

like f--king idiots they go in the door and its a dark open cave like something outta lovecRAFT and all thses chi things are crawlign around

slater does i mewan dorf domes somethingand slater closes the wall door and they leave and go thotugh the tunnels which is odd as they were trying to escape mins ago

dorf cant blow the charge he placed as the signal; is too fr and goes back to do it ads slater and tara escape uip a laddert that was somehow there

dorf putsd the timer on 5 seconds like rouge needing 5 mins to get the emeraldds amd it blows and the fire goes all the way to where slater and tara jump out of by the orphganarium

totally not like dy mo might by cecil b de mille where the guy has to sacrifice himself to save the hero and the chick by blowing himself apart underground

dont worry, he got oout in time, hes gonna be ok, theres a hospital planet nearby, hes in another dimention

in the building he finds the nin iced and in da city its evacuated, but we dont hear the reason or the "official" reason

man this peaceful thing of the vity is going on for a while

slater sez the gate was closed again and the ancients were wiped out for bringing dasrkness into the light and its happenign again

then we get a 1st pwerson viewe of something zooming toward slater and tara and credits to 00s music thats acxtually kinda good

its like a 90s anime or something

maybe cascada

max wanko? that dont sound wholesome!

Kurt Jackson? like curtis 50 cent jacksojn?

the end

thAT WAS a bit cr-ppy

the effects were good but the editing was kinda weird

thewres a loyt ofd space of guys not doing anything and it draGS a bit

but its not awful

good music and monster designs and while its eirher dumping exposituon on us, it noty doing anythging, it doesnt fit often

i dont hate it, and its got some of those 00s charms like the camera work and lighting and the ay people are filmed

its not hd so it looks normal and its got some good horror ideas

theres FAR worse moviers than this that I hated more

like From Justin To Kelly or Titanic

its sorta cr-ppy but not horrible

yeah a lot dont make sensew, but its a movie based on a playstation and gameboy game by the guy who made house of the dead

its not trying to be shakespera or better yet, berserk

getting mad at this for not being some "life changing, moving piece of cenema master piece" is like hating on Schindler's List for not being funny

its not trying to be! its jusat trying to be gory and bada55 and mnysterious abnd creepy

in that it hits the mark it aimed for

the acting wasnt even that bad

maybe if i played the games i'd think different, but this wasn't the abimination the critics claim it to be

oh and I'm not sure I get WHY the dr was doing this

For Alone In The Dark 2 I want slater to have been attacked by the thing, but his hidden powers created by the thing in him biting it, activate and he has a Light Beam from his hands he fires at it to disintegrate it. Then it  cuts to years later where the shadow creatures have taken over and people fight to survive in areas with generators they keep running by buirning the dead nightmare creatuires, Also skllater is now teaching others how to use Ki to Light Attack things as the creature in him jump started his training and sklipped the effort but he knows how to  do it and has Shine Soldiers who battle the darkness, Also its a 64 bit Psp and DS game like Shining Force where you play as a Shine Soldier and lead a unit of other guys witrh various Ki Abilities and Glowing Weapons and fight the monsters and posessed on a grid wiith missions and chapters.

Tekken Review

 Note: I spell iron fisted

Tekken

This is my review on Tewkken from the distant future year of 2009(The year Robotech happened)

Its based on the video game I only did the GBA version of as I never had a platystation

It stars Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa from Big Trouble in Little China/Twins/ the 90s Mortal Kombat movies/John Carp[enters Vampires/Pearl Harbor/the tim burton Planet of the Apes/Memoirs of a Geisha, Tamlyn Tomita from The Karate Kid Part II/The Day After Tomorrow/Law & Order: LA/The Good Doctor,  Candice Hillebrand from the 90s Sinbad, Gary Daniels from The Expendables/the live aCTION Fist of the North Star, Lateef Crowder from Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, Mircea Monroe from House Of The Dead 2/Fifty Shades of Black(Quality programming), John Pyper-Ferguson from Prom Night II/Pin/Unforgiven(Ww, thgis guys actually in GOOD things!/ Pearl Harbor(Maybe not)/She's the Man/X-Men: The Last Stand/The Crow: Stairway to Heaven/Judging Amy/Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles/Flashpoint, Blake Shields from Boy Meets World/Law & Order: LA, Jason Richter from, holy f, Free Willy!!/Laserhawk/Sabrina the Teenage Witch/Rugrats, andd most of the guys in here are kickbockers of mma guys

Its directal by Dwight H. Little who did Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers

I'm not too into Tekken, I prerfer Eternal Champions or Samurai Shodown, but I hear the guy who did Tekkenm hated this

Then agaiun, soviet steven king hated the 80s shining so what does he know?

I'm doing this on amazon prime and it startrs with a  buncha logos andf text

narator sez after some warsm, govs fell and corporations took over and divided the world into zones owned by em

the biggest one, tekkemn has a kung fu tournament where the winners get to live

we then get title and a guy gonna fight, then its 5 days b4 sand guys in a dump evading soldiiers with guns and he dodghes every shot while doing sportacus moves to escape

this is over credits btw and has 00s music

so trhe guys use machine guyns and execute the witnesses but this tteen escapes

to another sector

and gets to aa safe place withsome mad max guy wjho likes the beastlkkes

hi tech hobo sez teen can have all this 1 day but teen dont want itand brings him some tech sphere\

hobo gives him monrey but its not global diollars so he gives him anothermoney thing and teen leaves

we see heihachi whos not dauisuke gouri on a screen saying tekken is comming ansd strength is order like hes raoh in hokuto no ken

teen goes to a bar with a higfh tab but pays with paper money and is barkeeps fave customer like the room

he meeets a p-mp looking guywth 2 chicks and buys something or w/e and teens homiecomes by and wants teen, named jin, to figt in tekken as hes a good figher

but jin dont wanna as he fights for what he has to not a cause

then we get the japanese ceremony of tekken and heihachi talks with his goon to crack dowqn on antio coproperates like itts google or facebook

jin comes back to his mom or sensei or w/e and gives her the orange he bouyght from p-mmp and like soylent green, it cost a lot

she dont want him to go to tekken as its not what she trained him 4 andhe's tired of being a slum bum

he goes out after a fight and i guess shes gonna get it, also i saw the wikipedea artyicle, andshe warns thersv  bad gguys out

jin meets a blonde and they are gonna b-0ne but at hobos place, he was hacking inti tekken or w./e and the cops come in and goood sez they used the thing jin got him

hopbo ytrus a gun but is countered and good ends him with it

alsi jin is b0ning the blonde at the same time as this and the cops bust inn to jins mom/ssensewis place and aask, in japanese, wheres jin?

goon has the area of jins home missiled like ba rocks dr onesas jin coms home and m,om/sensei looks at him and takes out a few of their own guyts

after the smoke clears, jinm goes throughg her cr-p aand finds  phoptoes of him as a kid and remembes his past and training

learn nabnto sui cho ken

shaaaaaaaooooooo

she finds a tekken i d saying she was a fighter and whhen blonde comes by to comfort him, he b--ches out

at  a recruit station, a guy sez no one can win and is cr-ppily slapped so this britmo sezhes give an a55load of money rto anyone wjo lasts 1 round agaiinst this meathead

jin goes to siignb up and we get a mma thing in a cage like how Robn Ford wanted to kck trudeaus candy a55 after watching too much wwf

i'll f him when he's dead!!

so he goes in da cage andits broadcast and the guy beats him down and spits on him, but he comes back and kicks his a55 as heihachi watches

jin takes some hits but falls and is about to be finished as this is mortal kopmbat, but gets a life refill from memories and runs up the wall, then hammers him down

its kinda bada55

jin is the people choice and has beat marshall law and thisbritmo sez all otrher fighters jhave sponsosrs to handle paperword and britmo can handle it 4 him annd jin gets on his bus

hes gonna be mo lested!

i'm ssurprised the brit didnt offeer him candy

so jin recalls his moms words of the greed of corportration, like sony and square and microsoft, and in the city, goon is b0ning 2 giirls at once but we dont see nips

does he have 2 b0ners?

is this viper g t s?

heihachi comes by his secks pit and grabs his throat and tells him off and leaves him to live in his spurm smelling room

jin comes to thecivilized sarea andheihachi looks over data of the fighters of variousnationalitries and backgroundfs like its world heroes

wtf, a samurai? trhey allow swords inb a fist fight?!

SO WE GET THE FIGHTERS WORKING OUT AND showqing off their muscle and toned bods aLL SWEATY  and jin dont like the clothes hes givenb

if  this were real corporations, we'd see all the logos on em

jin meets a chick who he likes her toes but sez its hher skill with footwork in martial arts stances

we're 33 mins in? that felt like nothing!

so the fighters come up for the battle abd most are in small fight outfits that are easy to move in and show off their tight toned muscle bodds

if you had muscles like hulk hogan, you'd be in a speedo all the time too

te chick is christyine but imma kerep saying chck

raven faces eddy gordo in round 1 and itsa a good match with good action and moves

raven wins and goes to the next round so its not player 1 vs everyone

miigguel ffaces jin and briitmo ssz to uuse his egho and speeed against him and wear him out

btw jins hair looks riught for this, its pointed in the back and had the lines in it

jin staarts the fight andgets 1 hit but gets beat down but does more coountersand moveswith floor rolling grappl;es

man look at these flips aNMD SPINS

USUALLU i JUMP KICK or block and counter when they attacxm

jin recalls his moms training after being nailed and after a beat on, snaps miguels bone, then starts beating on him untul after its over

stop stop hes already dead!

jin returns and britmo ssez the better jin does the more money he makes but jin is sore

britmo sezjin was luckyt and goon comes by and asks if jins dads fought in tekken but jin knows not of his dad

jin goes tio traIN AND test his might and has viet nam flashbacks of his mom and busts the wood training thinfgs

suddenly hes got hairy pits and chick sees him, then goesa to some muscle guy and leaves w.o consent

goon looks up jins data and finds his dna matches 10-0% to his mom, which only makkes sense if he;''s her clone as the dad is 50% of his dna

chick is with jin whjo i didnt recognize as his hairs diffeent now and at a club and talk of their backstories

she was outside the Amerivan territories anddances in tight pantsand pakes out with jin while practically b0ning

they sneak back andgo back to the tekken and are gonna b0ne but done and she goes off

then in jins room, some ninjas come in and beat him up in a strobe light but chick returns and they fle

britmo sz they wont let him win from da slums but he reveals his mom was in tekken anmd britmo knew her

the williams chicks were the  ninas and goon bashes em for not ending him and the next day nina williams has to fight chick

nina  is dressed like some kinda bad 90s p0rn0 chick  or wwf girl

they fight andchhick wins and goon i think is kazuya whos heihachis son or something andtalks with a muyscle  guy busting cindeerblocks over musclleo beiung half robot and cyber enhancemenmmts are not allowed so he';d keep it quiet if muexzcle guyt does sh-t 4 him

then jinhas to fight toshimitsu whops a samurai annd birtmo gives him power gloves like zelda links aakening as his hands are stoll f'd

heihachi sezto recuyycle the match as this match is more semi final but goon ppulls a starscream sand has gis gn guys stop hheihachi as goon is in charge of security

are they robots? heihachi is the biggest guy on the planet!shopuldnt he have power over em?

so yoshimitsau swordfightsjin as jin has a naginata andf breasks jins weapon

jin fights on and toshiu ises his sheatrh but then tthey devolve into fists as the ratings climb higher

yoshimitsiu beats on jin andbritmo saez to stop da fight aNd goion sez jin is  his illegetimate son so heihacbi beats out guards and hits a security alarm

jin beats out yoshimitsu and wait, yeagh but hes busted up and secuitityy cracks dowbn on kt as chick and britmo get jin out

they see heihachi being arrested andget arrested and raven halps pop hisas f;'d out shoulder back in

goon sez cuz the ratings spiked when yoshimitsu was killed or nearly killed or w/e, hes changeing the rules in the middle of the game aND ALL MATches arer to the death

jin sez they otta rfuse to fight butwhen the guards come, ravesn beats em out and gets thier guns

dont they have armor? i mean their guard!

jin chick and britmo escape with raves an dits a chase in the building and jin meet sheiohachi

jin wants revenge and they free him to help emas raven is killed for being the black guy

they escape into the slums and the guarda are sent in tocatch em and in a tent the chick treats jins wounds and heihaCHI MISHIMA sez he knew her mom i mean his mom and jin sez tekken destroys lves

heihachi sez its to rebuiold the wortld back and jin sez its just killing people and blamers heihachi foir icing his mom

heihachi sez he dsaved his mom y getting her out after violating the riules or w/e wait, its from from her his son kjazuya raeping her and leaving her for dead and heihachi saved her

now jin is anothe rtheir to the tekken corporation

the hgauird saytack and use bazooka shots and brit mo buists em with a pipe as these epic gaurdsaa are beat by 1 engilshman and a metal rod

britmo is shredded by gunfire telling erm to run and they get caught and tazed

kazuya comes in andconfronts heihchi who sez he cant let kazuya have tekken as he'd f it ip

the guards take heihachi away and whyu dont he use his super mvopes to bust em? hes the game boss!

so hes at gunpoint and the buildign blows as i guessd thats 1 strong gun and kazyya sez heichaischi is dead

kazuya sez on the screen that now all fights are to the end and muscle guy andsome tommy wiseau loki homie face offd with chains and a spear

after a cut on msucle ghuya ndsoime thrashing, they fight fight and muscle guy beats his a55 and choaks him with a chain, then jerks it asnd kills him offscreen

raven isnt dead now and later zakuza tells jin that he would have iced his mom if he knew she was pregnatt and puts a ghun in nins face

to beat kazyua jin has to end the chamy byran fury whos the cyborg i think

kazyka takes chick out and backhands her, but puts her in a chain i mean chair

so raven sez anger dont ignite the soul it incinetates it and that jin has real power and skkill and can be a champ

jins fists are all busted up and blooded and has flashbacks to the gilm we're atching and remembers his dad friends like terry in the fatal futy oav vs geese

jin faces the finals against bryan fury and his blonde bimbo gf in the slums is watching aND JIN IS IN HIS POWER GLOPVES

1 punch and jun flies back and his attacks do jack sh-t and jack is j=k in off

so jin gets his a55 kicked an dhis kick does nothing to bryans face

at least pan sluvbged out general lock b4 he took it srs

bryan wraps an ammo belt on his hand and brutally beats jin and he rememebr shis mom saying every foe has a weakness

then he starts doing well anbd doing air atytacks, then runs up a cliff, and comet meteors doewn and ghbusts him

shouldnt his hand shatter from that?

kazyua goes in to be the game boss and gets axes and wait, do the people know heihachi is dead?

so tbey fight and jin gets a tien scar on his chest and is busted around

jin starts glowing and the wind picks up, then he awakens to his true self and at near light speed, punches his fist wrist deep into kazuya, then disintegrates him from inside out with a blast of ki

jk thats dbgt or w/e

so jins vengenace awakesn and kazuya sez its the mishima curse and beats on his and counters his attacks

as kazuya is gonna end his illegeitmate son like hes a kennedy or monarch, chick tackles a guard, gets his gun, and takes out another, even thought he bullets are clearly bouncing off him

kazuya looks off for a second and jin takes his chance and grabs his axe, thenslices kazuyua with it in the gut

walk it off candya55

kazuya is gonna chop him uyp i mean jin is hgonna do it butspares him and chick is therte now despite beign like hundreds of feet of in the skky seat seconds ago

she sez hes the peoples champion and new tekken ruler and he sez he wants to go homeand walks offw/o her for some reason

he gets on his coat fromthe start of the movie asnd doersnt get his huge a55 chest slice treated but all the guards who wwere hunting him days agoi are now serving him

chick sez the mishimas fell and jin kazama was now the name of hope and freedom and jin returns to the slums and btwe this was widescreen and color but kinda nice color like in the 00s

then credits to msuic and clips fo the movie showing the characters

paula c dckmeyer? like sa p0rnn0?

cgharles wuilspon? like charlie wisons war?

the end

that was prtetty entertaining

good action, nice ideas,decent acting, nice colorsd and fights,

wtf we got a post creditys scene wher eheihachi orders the guy to ovbey and he does, which means maybe he didnt bite it

you vcasnt kkill heihachi, until that one game they actuaslly did

but i liked this

its cool and fun and has a bit of gore

its not full on riki-oh but its cool and bada55 and entertaining

if you weant meaningful plot and life changign characters, why are you watchign a movie of a playstatio fighting game?!

we got gone with the wind and erich von stroheims greed for that

this is good action andf maretial arts

i mean it would have been nice to see heihachi kick a55 but mayeb in part 2

wait, we got a prequel for that

man the reviewers hated this

0% on rotten tomatoes?! didnt they hate on the Wb Godzilla King Odfd The Monsters Movie?

this one was cool and though I never really did the games, I enjhoyed it

Its got a good flow and doesn';t drag

For Tekken 2 I want it to be about Jin trying to give the people more fredom and rights but finds the sliimmer he liverd wioth are a bunch of viuolent malcointents who go wild without any guidance or order and devolve into a lawless mess of cannibalism and necromance, so after seeing his family company go from top to near bottom, he realizes his grandfathers words and cracks down on these animals! also its a 32/64 bit strategy game  on sega saturn, n64, 3D0 and playstatyioon 001 where you move your troops aroundthe areas and fight off the slumaniacs but only get good weapoons and attacks after Jin sees the error of his ways, but you can be heihachi who's back but lets jin learn by experiance and advices him but certain dialogue choices move him to advance faster, also in the end he fights the slomaniacs who fuse into a  mound of flesh and ooze as they gave up their humabnity and devolved

The Shadow Riders Review

 note; i spell gx

the shadow riders

this is my review on The Shadow Riders from the distant future year of 1982(30 years before Robotech 2 The Sentinels)

it starrts Tom Selleck from The Rockford Files/Magnum, P.I./Friends/Boston Legal/Blue Bloods/Myra Breckinridge/Coma/Quigley Down Under, Sam Elliott from Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid/Mask/We Were Soldiers/Hulk/Blood Diamond/Ghost Rider/Marmaduke/Robot Chicken, Katharine Ross from the Graduate/Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid/Tell Them Willie Boy Is Here/The Swarm/donnie darko, Ben Johnson from the outlaw/Tall in the Saddle/Angle and the Badmann/Red River/Mighty Joe Yoiung/Shane/One-Eyed Jacks/Major Dundee/Hang 'Em High/Hang 'Em High/Chisum/The Last Picture Show/The Town That Dreaded Sundown/Red Dawn/the 90s angels in the outfirelds, Geoffrey Lewis from moon of the wolf/high plaines drifter/little house on the prarie/Highway to Heaven/Double Impact/Maverick/The Devil's Rejects(gay!), Jeff Osterhage from Masque of the Red Death/Baldur's Gate II: Shadows of Amn, Gene Evans from Ace in the Hole/The Giant Behemoth(that one s-cked)/Shock Corridor/The Alamo: 13 Days to Glory/M*A*S*H, R. G. Armstrong from Major dundee/Children of the Corn  001/Predator  001/90s Dick Tracy, Jane Greer from Red River/Gentlemen Prefer Blondes/The Searchers/The Rare Breed/Billy the Kid Versus Dracula/Big Jake/Mask/The Whales of August/Back to the Future, Part III/Little House on the Prairie, Jeannetta Arnette from Touched By An Angel/V.I.P./Law & Order: Special Victims Unit, and a buncha guys not on wikipedea

Its directal by Andrew V. McLaglen who did The Rare Breed/McLintock!/Chisum/The Wild Geese

Aftyer opening credtis to guitar and showing photoes of what look like 1800s images, we get a voice over sayiongh the cvil war is ending sooon in april 65 and reading a letter he made

hes caPTAIN AND HIS BROTHER IS ON SOME SIDE OF THE VICIL WAR , then we see tom in bed and being cared for by a blonde who wants to b0ne him

she feels his feet as thats hwer fethish i assume and as she gets into his bed, a door knocks and sez the war is overand they need tommy boy

ho goes out on his horses a55 andf wait its not him and this confederate is gonna be executed for blowing a thing in da war but confederates come over and save him

the saved guy is sam eliot from hulk and is offered to come with em but he wants to go back to Texas so they give him a gun as hes a ral amercian and they goo oof w/o him

sam goers off and comes to a shed and its abandened and squatts there

later some inbred folk come by and see his horse and i think are gonna b0ne itbut sam ko's 1 with his gun and beats outy the other who used a knife

so sam goes by some town and theres these duck dynasty guys there and drops off the beat out rednecks he had with him

the rednecks want revenge on him for beating em out as theyre related

he's gonna sdquael like a pig!

meanwhile, tom and blonde arer lovey and they see they hicks gonna string up sam and tom gets ready as sam fiughts em

sams beat out and they get the noose and are gonna end him but tom comes in and sez sam is his brother

1 hick is gonna cap tom but tom takes himn out and has em on the ground as tom reunites with sam

they ride off and come to a home with a hun pointing out the qwindow and its their dadwho welcomes em in

dads got a limp and is glad to see his kids and their ma is tyhere too and thought sam was dead

dad sez some guys attcked and took someone and the food and animals

it was confederate soldiers which seems off as its usually the yankees who looted and raided the south towns

so sam and i think tom go off to find rthe family guys who got caught by alleged confederates and ask around and 1 guy sez it was renegades and if anyone tried anything theyd get iced

so the super america bros hear where the alleged renegades were headed and go on and we see all the captured women and none are asian! where are all the asian confederates?! racist!!

the chicks get spazzy and wanna escape and main chick sez they gotta figger out how to save themnselves as no one might come

theres also a lot of cows and i;m not sure if either the girls or cows are still virgins

so main chick offers a ring to a guy named jesse who she wants to marry maybe and thinks her real b4 is in h e double soviet califoenia

i think jesse is another prisoner and the alleged confederates send her back with the chicks as they are mus lim or zentrraedi and dont want the genders mixing

head renegate sez if jesse trys anything hes iced and jesee puts a switchblade in the ground and cuts his hand ropes with it

the captors have a cooking pot and main chick goes to ask main captor why hes doing it

head captor sez hes doing it to keep his southern way of life and wants to bering back the love or w/e

she sez the captives have no involvement but head cap sezx hes sorry but hes gotta do it

jesse thtows sand in a guards face and runs but the regenges chase him and they spasticly go after him

he escapes to the ocean and they dont wanna cap him but then see the women are running, they cap him and his head is hit but it dont show it blow like h e double j fk

the captors sez he would have got a good price in soviet mexico and i'm thinking, didnt mexico end slave owners rightsb4 the war?

we're only 40 mins in? i thought it was both more and less

so tiom sizemore and sam waterston go on talking of this chick sam want3ed to marry but she might thiunk hes dead

at later the head cap sez sorry to main chick about her friend and offers her booze while saying they'd give her a good southern life

she sez they';d cap him for his acts and he sez he's  still a southern army guy

also jesse had an extra life as he crawls outta the water a tnight

a boat comes y and it might be pirates or maybe butt pirates and later jesse sees the america bros and is glad to meet him

ofh they are all brothers

so the boat guys come on and 1 looks like col sanders and cap head wants to end the yankee menace

not sanders gives em guns and will get him 200 more and ammo in 2 days sailing but he wants money 1st

head cap sez the people he caught will do well in da silver mines and not sanders wants the women to buy as butt slaves

he offers 5000 $ for the blonde as  mexicans like em blonde and thicc in ther a55 and with 12 rifles, head cap sells main chick

jesse tells tom and sam about the captors wanting to sell the men/women for things in h e double mexico and jesse sez he got a shoulder shot in ytennessee but bros dont care what he was on

at the beach, not sanders sez they'd go with the slaves and a  few guys to get the cr-p and in days later they'd send for the cattle and men

not sanders offers main chick pheseant and if she uses the kknife on him, his man would cap her

he sez he's gonna bring him as his woman but worries she'd make a necklane of his teeth, but is gonna leave her there and get her later, while takijg the other girls too sell

hih, this is based on a novel byu Louis L'Amour

so the boats  leave with the indentured servants and later tom and bros come overand sneak around liki ninja and take out the guards

so a stampede happens and trhe tom bros gun down the captors and save main chick wait not her weait it is her

she sez they took the girls and where theres going to mexico and the need uncle blkack jack like the opsamu tezuka character

hes a convict and has a ball and chain on and is sawing a law and was in jail for something about a chick and capping guys in defence

sam sez they need him and they blow the door to the jail house with dino might and ride off with him

so jackie knows all the info on soviet mexico and places to b0ne and jesse sees some horses comming for em

jack sez he capped the son of a mayor and tom sez if they catdch him he cant be mayor and they book it

so they cross the rio grande and the boats make it to mexico and brign the slaves to the mexicoes who gomoff on carts

later the goodf guys wake up and the way they keep meeting new members of the team is like a jrpog like lunar or breath of fire

jack had been out with chicks and then he returns as the posse comes closer and jack sez they want hi for drinking and doing something he regretted

this is wy i dont drink

so they bring the slaves to meixicowho lust after the blkondes and are probably gonna fatten em a bit to giuve ewm ther booty they desire

the chicks are put in a cage and elsewhere, sam talks with chick about how she was into a guy named frank but she said she'd wait for him

she told him she heard he was dead and waited too long for him and she gets b--chy over him not asking hert what frank asked her

tom and jesse joke about it and tom asks jesse hows ur love life

tommy wiseau asks; hao ees yoor secks laif?

jesse is too busy with helping his rents to b0ne any chix and tom ants to be governer

jack sez he knows people near by and they will let him in but not the others and he gon go to pray at a mission

at da church, jack steals a priest robes as i guess he dont care about going to h e double england

AT SOviet  mexico, the head cap wants to see the guns now and not sanders caps the casptors man and has head captor locked up

jack wants to use chick as a fake nun to sneak in undercover and have sam and tom do stuff as hthe captor knows jesse

tom tells chick that sam is worth statying with as hes got some issues but is good inside or some cr-p from care brars

tom and chick talk about if its risky to go in the camp and tom keeps shifting the subject

she sez he runs from women and he sez hes got no room in his life for 1

so they go to the base and jack has dino might and booze he stole and plans on doing stuff

so chick goes in as a nun and jack goes in saying something aboiut his nephew

chick goes to the jail and meets te sisters and not sanders recognisez hwssr and talkkes off her nun robe

at the cantina the jack and the tom and havin cigars that i hope are not chronic and gets em in theere

jhe locks em in and throws the dino might and blwos emm apart in a splattery burst thsat probably has shredded fl;;esh and rended organs arll over the wall

aLL H--LL BREAKS LOOSE AND GUYS ARE SHOOTING AND TOIMS THROWING DINO MIGHT AND JESSE AND SAM COME  IN ADN CAP THE GUYS AS THEY RIDE IN

TOM AND FRIENDS  i mean head captor granbs a mexico and strangles him form his prison cell traincar and takes his gun and gets out

the train starts going with a guiy on the logs firing and tom caps him and gets after it by taking a guys horses a55

jesse shoots off the lock and frees the chicks but the main chick and the sisters or w/e are on trhe train

sam meets the head captor and sam spares him as head captor wasd the guy who saved him at the start and lets him go off

tom and friendfs go after the train even though back to the futuire 03 says a train can go faster and the posse gets there after the fight

like how the courts have ruled that the cops dont gotta risk their lives to save u and are mainly there to clean upo after

so tommy boy comes after da train and colon i mean colon sanders throwas a stick of dino might and blows tiomes horse

the sisters yell like he can hear himn, outsaide and with the train sounds

he and sam get on da train somehow and colon sanders sez they are gonna send em to mexico city

tom looks in hanging upside sown and his hat stays on and they bust in the winfddsows as glass is candya66

they beat out and throw the guards out the windoiw and get colon sanders at gunpoint and make him stop da train

they come out with him and uncle black jkack is caught by ther posse and the head posse guy looks undead

the supoer tom selleck brothers hold the posse at gunpoint and wanna make sherrif  head posse let him go

they eventually get sherrif to admit that jack was b0ning his wife and jack sez his widfe was chasing him for years and he just stopped running

chick offers to trade colon sanders for black jack pershing and her accepts

what is he? a yugioh card?!

sherrif sez he dont want jack in his town of big springs and tom sez hes running for sherrif of bigsprerings

so the posse goes back and the fam whos called traven but i heard draven like in the crow, start their long road back home

the end

That was pretty good

nice lite bright colorful earthy toined 80sd western

good plot twists and story and it had some heart

nice adventure and quest and the acrting and music was good

tom and sam were good and pretty bada55 but nice guys

its not the most serious but tis pretty hardcore and is more clean than most things now

its a solid pg and i hjonestly dont recall swearing even

its good to see tom selleck having fun as i know him most from blue bloods(d hero bloo d)

For The SAhadow Riders 2 I want them to be heading home and as tyhey leave mezxico, come across a cursed town where the residents were devolveed by daemons they worshipped into chimpeople and need help from tom and friends to find the cure, they go around mexico collecting holy items to heal the devolution and take on the daemon thast corrupted them, alsdo they were turned from too much chronic. Its also a 128 bit RPG on Sega DreamCast, GameCube, PS2 and XboX where you play as them and go aorund through carious dungeons inmexico from the people before.

Cartoon All Stars To The Rescue Review

Note; I spell Cartoony

Cartoon All Stars To The Rescue

this is my reviwe on Cartoon All-Stars to the Rescue from the distant future year of 1990 (30 years before transformers super god masteforce)

Its a big crossovewr that aired on all 4 main natworks to help prevenbt kids getting into drugs

as a 90s kid i never saw this when it was on as i was like 3, but i did watch it later on youtube

its from the glory days of the 90s when kids shows were clean andcool and cartoons on saturday am were the thing

it startrs Jason Marsden from The Secret World of Alex Mack/The Secret World of Alex Mack/A Goofy Movie/Spirited Away/Fox's Peter Pan & the Pirates/Mighty Max/Batman: The Animated Serie/The Mask/The Mask/Extreme Ghostbusters/Histeria!/Batman Beyond/Roughnecks: Starship Troopers Chronicles/Static Shock/Justice League/The Fairly OddParents/Loonatics Unleashed/Transformers: Rescue Bots/ the 10sa ThunderCats/Ultimate Spider-Man/Beware the Batman/Hulk and the Agents of S.M.A.S.H., Paul Fusco from ALF, Ross Bagdasarian Jr.from Alvin and the chipmonks, Jeff Bergman from Gremlins 2: The New Batch/Jetsons: The Movie/Big Miracle/The Lego Movie/The Flintstones & WWE: Stone Age SmackDown!/Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders/Tiny Toon Adventures/Doug/Family Guy/Totally Spies!/The Looney Tunes Show/New Looney Tunes, Jim Cummings from Who Framed Roger Rabbit/FernGully: The Last Rainforest/Aladdin 1-3/The Lion King/The Pagemaster/The Pagemaster/Pocahontas/Balto/All Dogs Go to Heaven 2/The Hunchback of Notre Dame/Anastasia/The Lion King II: Simba's Pride/The Road to El Dorado/Titan A.E./The Life & Adventures of Santa Claus/The Life & Adventures of Santa Clau/The Life & Adventures of Santa Claus/Wreck-It Ralph/The Garbage Pail Kids Movie/G1 Transformers/DuckTales/80s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles/The New Adventures of Winnie the Pooh/Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers/TaleSpin/TaleSpin/Tiny Toon Adventures/The Pirates of Dark Water/The Pirates of Dark Water/Darkwing Duck/Batman: The Animated Series/The Addams Family/Goof Troop/Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog Sat AM/Animaniacs/The Pink Panther/The Tick/Gargoyles/Gargoyles/the 90s Spider-Man/Spider-Man/yhe Mask/Spider-Man/Earthworm Jim/Freakazoid!/Superman: The Animated Series/Space Goofs/King of the Hill/CatDog/The Powerpuff Girls/The New Woody Woodpecker Show/The Book of Pooh/Disney's House of Mouse/The Simpsons/The Simpsons/The Spectacular Spider-Man/The Looney Tunes Show/Bump in the Night/Aaahh!!! Real Monsters/Captain Planet and the Planeteers/Dexters Lab/The Twisted Tales of Felix the Cat/Teen titans(ew! Gay!) Townsend Coleman from the tick/TMNT/Fewrngully/Inspector Gadget/90s superman/Timon & Pumbaa/90s Spider-Man/Mighty Ducks: The Animated Series/Batman Beyond/The Batman/Hulk and the Agents of S.M.A.S.H./Animaniacs/Danny Phantom/Earthgworm Jim/Dexters Lab/Fairly Odd Parents, Joey Dedio from Extreme Ghostbusters/Law & Order/Captain Planet and the Planeteers, Janice Karman fro Albin sand the Chuipmpnks, Danny Goldman from Robot Chicken/Mighty Max/The Smurfs/Yopung Frankenstwein/MASH, Frank Welker from pretty much everything, Aaron Lohr from the Mighty Ducks Movies/ Goofty Movie/Baywatch/Fox's Peter Pan and the Pirates/The Wondr Yewarts/Blossom/Law & Order/Blue Bloods, Don Messick from The Andromeda Strain/ the 70s Charlotte's Web/Rudolph and Frosty's Christmas in July/The Last Unicorn/Jetsons: The Movie/Tiny Toon Adventures: How I Spent My Summer Vacation/The Flintstones/Yogi Bear/The Jetsons/Jonny Quest/The Banana Splits Adventure Hour/Scooby Doo/Tom and Jerry/Rudolph's Shiny New Year/The Smurfs/The Transformers/DuckTales/Tom and Jerry Kids/Tiny Toon Adventures/Bobby's World/Bonkers/Garfield and Friends/Freakazoid!/The Real Adventures of Jonny Quest. Lorenzo Music from Garfield/TaleSpin/Darkwing Duck/Rugrats/The Jetsons/The Real Ghostbusters, Laurie O'Brien from Dungeons & Dragons, George C. Scott from Inherit the Wind/The Rescuers Down Under/Patton/The Bible: In the Beginning.../Dr Strangelove, Russi Taylor from Who Framed Roger Rabbit/Jetsons: The Movie/DuckTales the Movie: Treasure of the Lost Lamp/The Rescuers Down Under/Babe/Fantasia 2000/The Flintstones & WWE: Stone Age SmackDown!/The Smurfs/Dungeons & Dragons/Muppet Babies/DuckTales/The Simpsons/Bonkers/Biker Mice from Mars/The Critic/A Flintstones Christmas Carol/Timon and Pumbaa/Quack Pack/Disney's House of Mouse/Teen Titans, and a few not on wikipedia

so it starts with a message of President Bush 1 and his woman saying to talk about drugs and booze and keep off em

then wee ghet this innocent home and littlew blonde girl in bed like a specilburg nmovie and a hand takes her piggy banm

the smurfs in the book notice and come out to aleart her, as alf and garfield are there

why does she have a framed picture of alf?

so alf sez "helf or i eat u" to fgartlcid and the chipmonks come out of a rewcord

hwr pooh bear doll has em use a kermit baby clock to wake her up and the toons hide as i guess this is toy story

and slimer is therte for no reason ands eats a clock that looks like fruit and the light shines on where her banmk was and she sees it

i assume thats the real slimer and this is canon to ghostbusters

so the toons, who are not a different sizew, go in tthe girls brothers room aand he busted the  bank and sister comes in and catches hgim with it and a box he hides under the bed

The toons are hiding there and see inside and simonb knows its chronic

sister trus to help brother but hes all f;d pout and has devolved eyes and walks ouyt

the toons decide to save him from his addiction and many of them go off to help him

at an arcade the teen uses chronic and this smoke daemon tells him evil like forget ur sister and her bank

also 1 of his homies offers him crack like he's biden jr

now i'm not the biggest fan of bush 1 or 2, but at least they knew drugs were bad!

with back door biden legalizing cheroniuc, its only a matter of tyime before cocainum is decriminalized

teen almost does crack but the cops come and the teens scatter and he runs as innocent people have much to fewar from the law

the smoke dssaemon leaves him and the cop comming is bugs bunny impersonating one

smoke mocks bugs formbeiung a toon and bugs seals him in a garbage can

bugs find ajoint and asdks why he started and ten sez he wanted to

bygs uises a coyotes time machine which looks like the technodrome

at home the dad knows theres some beers missing and mom asks  sister if her bro is ok and she sez no

pooh asks wehy dshe didnt tell and shes surprizd he can tock

she dont wanna tell as she dont want him in toreuble and blaming him and pooh sez if she dont teell he might get wortse

bugs showes a b/wthing of him 2 years ago when he was young and innocent and sees teens smoking chronic and trys it cuz they prtessured him as the said he was a candya55 if he didnt

reminds me of mike tyson how he didnt wanna be seen as weak for losing a boxing match, so he disqualified himself by biting off the other guys ears

now we dont think he's weak, we thinks hes devolved and borderloine cannibal

bugs sez; if everyone jumped off a cvliff, would tyou?

well, now we got base jumping

also thats the kinda logic people use to justify things today

its natural, animals doi it

like inbreeding and eating poop

teen sez the junkies are his friends and wont  steer him wrong, but bugs sez you gotta believe in urself

drugs make u feel good now but after a wehile, they ruin u

at home, sister tells dad shes worried of brother and he sez teens always are weird

with his droogs, 1 teen wants 10 4 for crack and teen dont think its good ,, but smoke daemon throws the wallet of teen and blondce junkie runs

teen runs after her and falls in the sewer and meets michaelangelo from ninjha turtlkes

so is this canon to who framed roger rabbit or thew chip and dale movie?

minmkey sez the drugs are devolving his brainand pulls a plug and the sewage drains to a roller coaster with the muppet babies and seeing the human brain to show the drugs devolve u

also as u get used to it, you need em toi function

btw chronic ages and devoil;ves the brain, which makes it function worse and impares your thinking ability

also the human brain doesnt finish developing until its in the mid 230s, so ir urt under 25 and doing drugs, its gonna f u up

teen realizes this is his brain thats spazzing out and he sees himself struggling to functuion on a sk8 board

trhe brain stratts falling apart and the muppets escape and teen wakes up in a field and the hewie dewie and lewie from ducktales are there

they sez to say no and song a song with the other toons to say no as smoke jdaemon offers em drugs

i had several guys trying to offer me drugs and i always said no and told him i dont do drugs, and got oiutta there

you never know what those drugged up animals might dfo

remember that guy they saidf was on bath salts who ate the hobos face and the cops shredded him with gunfire?

the tox screen said he only had chronic in his system

some people are vulnerable to psychotic breaks from the substances in the drug and it breaks them

not everyone, but some people smooke 40m years and never get lung cxancer

do you really wanna play russuian roulette with your sanity?

also as that guy was eating a mans face, it reminded me of how chumps attack people and eat off their faces/hands/parts

drugs causes devolutions!

btw, why wasnt there optimus prime or one of the transformers in here?

i mean yeah a 20 foot truck would be kinda weird to fit in, but it would work

maybe get the robotech guys in here like lisa talking about his cousin who OD'd after the war

they did that weird UN thing so they could do a drug add

so teen wakes up in bed and finds his drugs and sister comes in asking tio talk to the rents

he is b--chy and threatens her adn twqqists her arm but feels bad as she runs off

he reconsiders his drug use and alf brings him to a hall of mirrors to show him his devoilved look where hes all rotted

teen sez he can quit anytime he wants and shows him the man in charge whops tyhe smoke daemon

sister comes backa nd finds his drugs and smoke daemon trys to get ther to do the drugs

pooh sez dont but smokey throws im in the closet and looks in

in teens world,m he seez a roller coaster and amusement part like nightmare ciurcis but not as f'ds up and flys around through saws and the indsise of a monster as toons are around

after a buncha wridfd cr-p hes eventually winds up seeing his future where ddaffy isd a fortune teller

sister wants to do drugs to be friends with her brother again and teen sez him as a rotted zombie all spazzed out

the toons tell him hes good w/o drugs andhe comes out and sees his sister holding her drugs

he knox em out and tells her to never do it but she sez he does it and theres a word struggle between somke daemon and sister over  teens soul

he throws smoke thing out into the gfarbage truck and smokey vboes to be back

teen sez the thing will return a but now he has his rents to help him and pooh escapes a c[lostet and jimps inot the poster with all thewse liscences characters, whos ownbers i doubt wiould allow this poster to be made

then a soft innocent song of hoppe wuith cartoon voices

the end

tht was actually good

nreally quality animation, esp compared to today

grteat music

nice voices and a good message

its got heart and good style and is kindfa like beyound scared strtaight or iunterventiuon\

i liked it and it holds up

nowadays people mock it but after all the drug shows i've seen, its got more truth than most would admit

also pagan tribes used mind altering substances to allow wicked spirtits to accesss them and commune

llike how The bible says the unriughteous dont get the kingdom of Heaven, and 1 thing is called "sorcerreers" but the original word was Pharmacia, which means drugs

When President H W Bush went after Panama for its drug lords, they found at his place a lot of drugs and stuff fort black rituals!

When I was a 90s kid I saw  power rangers adds sayiong not to do drugs, whch helped me stay clean

same with liqour and smokes and b0ning

nowadays they try to make drugs look fun or coolm, but really, its deadly

for Cartoon All Stars to the Rescue 2 i want it to be about a new generation of kids getting into drugs and modern cartoons like steven universe or the netflix she ra say that chronic is good for you and opens your mind, but then the REAL cartoons come in and counter with facts about drugs, but the modern cartoons get offended and spazz out and call em racist, but the 80sm  and 90s cartoons dont care what the modern ones think and its a big epic battle between the past ones and modern ones, also its a 64 bit DS and PSP gamelike mario and sonic at the olympics where you play as either the modern casrtoon characters or good ones and face various mini games over the soul of the kids in the 20xx years.

Teen Wolf Review

 note; i spell non furry

YTTeen Wolf

This is my revierwe on Teen Wolf from the distant future year of 1985(the year lisa from robotech was born)

its directal by Rod Daniel who did Home Alone 4: Taking Back the House

it stars miuchaerl j fox from back to the future 01-03/Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey Mars Attacks!/Stewartn Little 01-03, James Hampton from The China Syndrome, Matt Adler from the day AFTER TOMORROW, Mark Arnold from blade runner 2049, the well done Mark Holton from pee wees big adventure/The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!/A League of Their Own/Leprechaun 001/Seinfeld/Leprechaun Returns, Scott Paulin from the 80s/90s Captain America, and some 80s chicks i never heard of

i saw most of this b4 but didnt see it all but it got some 80s and 010s tv shoes and had plans for the horrid alyssia milano to be in it

so after logo and credits for a while, we get sweaty micahrl j fox shootin some b ball and his team f's out

when grappling for the ball he goes a bit daemon and the guy lets him have it, only to f up the shot

so in da showers this cool guy in shades wants money and trys tio scam guys form it

also fox has a long chest hair and goes to see da coach for help but coach has irs issues and dont care

he has issues with his body developing and dont wanna play anymore

nowadays he's wanna take hormone blockers whuich prevent bones from developing and they cripple out

coach sez his problems are piddly and his life is good as hes got a job with his dad

and then he transitions from mammal to avian and becomes micharl j c0cks!

or was tyhat his p00rn0 name?

so fox b--ches to a chick about him not wanting things to dyasytay thew same and wants to do something, also hes into a chick called pamela

better thn tht animal nazi pam anderson, someone otta giuve her a blended horse enema

so fox goes to his dads hardware store and hears somethingoh its a dog whistle and takes itfrom a kid blowing it

he's devolving! from man, to dog, to lizard, to frog, to frenchie!

later at school the pircnlepl throws him tape in the hall and then this blonde is doing a play reading

fox interrupts to try to hit on herand invite her to a thing but this alpha male comes in and smooches the blonde and they goo oof

so later he tells dad at dinner he wants to quit b ball and later his shades scammer homie wantys him too stick up a liquor store with a plastic gun in his pocket and pay for it so he cant say he wobbed it

he gopes in adnd asks but the owner wants ID but he goers daemon boice and the guy gives him it\

its gonna go urotsukidoji, he'ds gonna b0ne someone til they blow apart@!

so they drive around with a keg i assume they aint drinking, but thenm 1 guy is standing on a car as they drive to surfi usa

fox grows elf ears for a bit and freaks out but iut goes

man this guys a dumba55, 1 move and hes street grease!

so they go to a party and theres a stack of kegs of beer as, like drugs or guns, making it illegal doesnt stop people from gettin git

they play 80s party games where they hand out names and the teens gotta do stuff with the oname they got, whikch i assume in the real version is b0ning

this chick gets foix and thery go to da closet and make out but his claws poke her

after times up they come out and later, foc drives his dads van home an is kinda spazzy

then he goes to the bathroom and devolves into a sasquatch thing and dad wants to know what hes doing in there

imagine if in the real version he was j-rkin oiff and balsting the walls with foamy goo?

so he opens the door and dads a sasquatch too and he sez he was hoping he wouldnbt have to worry of this as it might skip a generation

so he goes to his room and dont wanna talk and the next day he sezx there was a full moon and he dont wanna be a werewolf as he thinks they eat people and stuff but dad sez thats onlu movies

herewul;f is a part of him but dont change what he has inside

so at school he sees the chick he offered to date who sez he missed it and chick he made out with is p-ssed at him for some reason

at class he hears of roomulas and remus who were fed by a wolf milk and at another class is a book by toim wol

so he goos up to the black boiard and his thumb is clawed and he sppazzes out and runs off  to the toilet

imagine in the real version he really had a b0ner and ran to j-rk off on the floor?

toilet 1 is outta order and toilet 2 had a guy in it writing on the mirror, probably a message to the guy hes gonna eat nexty

in the 3rd bathroom he uses the sink and porinciple wants to see his hands but its clean and he wants to know who is using a marker

so later scammer goes through his garage for something his bro has and when fox asks to tell him someithing, scammer asks if hes a faeg

so fox turns furry and can do it at will but somethines it comes out on its own\

also scammer is wearing a shirt saying "what are you looking at d=-=k nose?"

surpriuszed this wasnt centiored on comet

so chick he made out with is plauying b ball with fdox's dad which is normal for teen and teens rents to do and wins, but then dad does well afgter she leaves

chick talks with fuches about him being inot the blonde and how blonde has a manly bf

later its a b ball game and scammer and chick sit mirror of each other with legs crossed to show his important homies at school

in the game he devolevs, and everyone startes, but he scores a baskewt and wveryone cheers

thats nromal, they see a freakin sasquatch and are cool with it cuz he can play spoirts

then again, often celebs get away with b0ning things they souldnty, so this is less awful

is this where air bud got it from?

so they go to the uyice bar or w/e and have poizza nd blonde likes michael j furry now

then hesd a celeb at school in a montagebe being a werewulf in shacdes

this is like something from yugiho gx

so vice pricinle sez fox may be special but hes till the vive pricnlpel and fgox is cool with it

so teen wolf wins another gamne and has fans wanting autiographs and does wlel in class

at anothher game he is a ball hog and is letting it go to his head and sdcammer is selling teen wolf cr-p

also blonde wants to givbe fuchs a role in the play made for him

so in da play blonde plays a southern belle who begs not to burn her home buy yankee fox wiolf orders his men to

then blonde takes fox back and in in her undies  and seducing him and i think they b0ned

is that interspecies?

well, so is Goku/Chichi in DBZ or Max/Miriya in robotech

so they go gbowling and alpha male is there and dont like fox b00ning his gf asnd tells him off saying hes still a nerdf and his kind was blown out with alpha males shotgun

so wolf tajkes blonde back home and she serz shes still seeing alphamale and is going to da dance with hm

after a game, the other teams menbers is disgruntled with wulfewnstein stealing the wins and glory

scammer gets a big a55 van called then wolfmobile and drives around with fox on the roof playing air guitar like bill and tes and doing stunts like flips that ate TOTALLY not a stunt double

dad sees and later talks with wolf about not gopoing to work at the hardware store and car surfuing

so wolf sez a kot of guys hate him and dad sez once he got mad and wolfed out and scared off a guy after mrs wolf but regretted it as it changed things

so later chick wants to go to the dance with fox not wolf and he dont wanna, but they'd still dance even as a werewulf

then a saturday night life or live or fever thing of him getting ready for the dance and then at da dance its prtetty 80s or 50

alpha male sez to keep away from his woman and he dances with chiick to 80s mucic

everyone dances except cvice pricjicle and blonde/alpha male

so chuick i think b0nes teen wolf and wait, he turns back to human modfe for a 30 mis, thern they come back and i think they b0ned

alpha male slugs out fox and calls him a frerak for being with his bimbo and i got a phone call from some gaijin so i missed it but wikipedea sez he attacked him ina woilf frezy and leaves

vice pricnlpe, sez he wanted this for a long time and is gonna kick him out but wolfs dad comes obver and sez to leave him alone and makes wolf sounds

i think vice was the guy dad wolfed out on as a youth

so in da play rehearsal he dont do the wolf and goes off anbd later sez to his droogs he cant woldf out anymore

but the finals in b ball is in a few hours and if he plays as da wolfd he'd s-ck

so he goes there and they play withough the wolf and its an 80s montage and the main team does well out of noweree

so also the alpha male is on the otherr team, which i wonder about as i thought he was at this school

so in the last second with 1 point behind, aplha male knox down fox on sox and c0x and he gets 2 free throws

so to the surpirze of no one who watches 80s movies, he makes it and everyone cheers in slo mo

blonde goes to fox but he skips her as shes a sl-t and makes out with chickthen his thing gets the full fwulf power and extrends so fat it skerers her and pinsd her to the ceiling

jk

the end

pat peach? thom adcock? isd this a p0rn0?

but that was a good one

nice lite teen movve about findfing ur place and knowing who uyr real friends are

nice effects and story and music and the acting is well done

its got heart and holds up and tells its right

it was 12+ in soviet brazilk/norway and was pg in America as they ainb't candya555

For Teen Wolf 2 I want it to be later and fox is turning weird, soo he starts devoving more into an animal creature with a tail and muzzle and longer parts, also he starts notricing other dogs as atytrACTIOVE and fights his urges, its also a 32/64 bit Dating Simuylator on Sega Saturn, N64, PS1 and 3DO where you play as the wulf and have several girls, including various animals, that you date as you gradually devolve like with Jeff Goldbloom in The Fly

The Man From Beyond Review

 Note : I spell magicly delicioous

The Man Froim Beryond

This is my review on The Man From Beyond from the distant future year (to Caklligula) of 1922 (100 yewars before Robotech 2 The Sentinels)

It stars Erich Weiss Aka Erich the prince of the air (Which is like the Bible thing abnou Powers and perimncipalitries being daemons) aka Herry Houdini who was into some dark arts things, Luis Alberni from Svewngali/The Mad Genius/The Ten Commandments, Nita Naldi from the 20s The Ten Commandments/the 20s Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and the rest i never heard of and were from like the 1800s

I never saw this but heard HH did movies and looked it up and found this

its directed by Burton L. King who did nothing i saw

so after title and credits we getta Bible verse of how those in the graves will hear His voice and Resurrect

in the artic of the north people go around in dog sleds and 1 is francois dival whos a half breed like inuyahsa and a soldier of fortune

the polar expedition is lead by greg sinclair like greg snegodff and ian sinclair and is a science nerd and he cant go on as he's f'd out but duval sez those with em who stoped to rest froze

duval leaves greg to die in the ice and finds a ship frozen in the ice so he goes back for him

in the ship which looks ghostly and cool they find a man frozen in a block of ice who has a hateful look

1 gjy chops open a frozen door and its suval and looks around the ship for looot as nerd chex out the guy in the block of ice like a mario game with ice flowers

duval chops into a door and nerd is curious and looks aorund with duval and reads papers

a book from 1820 sez the boat is going under and to ditch it and it was left miles away from where it is now

duval chops at the frozewn guy and nerd reads a letter to a sister from the boat and theres a girl on the boat with her dad and the ship was blown off cource

duval brings tthe frozen guy he chopped out from the block into the ship and hes got a wounbd on him and they build a fire and take off his clothes

they rub him andhe opens eyes and it cuts to this boat at sea and a storm happens

a guy is arouund and meets a chick and then therews wind and rain and oh its a flashback and the chick wants someone to save her dad

this movie seems to be taking a long tme and itrsa only 15 mins in

so frozen guy gets in a fight ND gets hit in da head andthe guys ditch him and its back in the 1900s and he wants his girl

nerd thinks they brought him to a world he jas nothing in and frozen runs around in crotch rags in the snow and thet briing him back to da boat

to keep him from eating his gun, they donbt tell him the truth and say they'd help him find his woman

then its civilization and he takes a car to professor crawford stange(dr strange?!) whos nerds bro in law and ARE GONNA GATHER INFO B4 TELLLINg the world of it

at there, some guys neice felice , the same name as the fromzen guys gf, and dr treas=nt is gonna marry and theres a ceremony yhere

frozeno think the chick is his gf and talks to her but is pulled awayby like a half dozen guys

she sez she knows nothing of him and fronazo keeps comming for her AND SHE SEZ SHES NOT AFRAID AND IS OK WOITH HIM

he sez hes howard her gf, like howard from big bang therory who's actor supports evil and tried to be a magician and she dont know him

1 guy called the cops and the nut house and ftozano asks why shes marrying him? did she think he bbit it? and talks of the voyage

then we getta flashback with he goes to see the gf in the boat as her dad is sleeping by a chessboard and they make out

dad wakes up and he hides behind her back and he sleeps aghain and they probably b0ne in the REAL version

a sailor comes down and sees em and dad wakes up and ftrozeno goes upstairs

in da 1900s they give frozano a chance to speak and she is falling for him and fronazo sez how captain tried to humnilkiate himin front of gf by stringing him with a rope on his leg

he gets out and is caught by boat guys and sent below

so da cops come and nerd dont wanna interfere until the full story is told and says fronazo is his guest

so the cops take fronazooff and chick goes off to him and 1 guy vows to look after frozano after his relase

chick asks nerd where her dad is as nerd is her uncle and he sez dad turned back after hearing she was sick from treant

she sez she wasnt sick and her dad isnt here and suspects  trent but he sez to finish the wedding peach then search and tries troo mooch her but she dont consent

she wants to find dad and i think blacks out and is carried off and trent didnt expect nerd to return and asks duval wehere fronzao is from

chick sez to i think nerd that trent sed her dad was sick in da north and wanted her to come and as she cant go alone, she was gonna marry him

trent tries to turn duval to his side and sez he can help frozano if not for his mental issues

so so frozano is locked up and they tie him up and wrap him in sheets and run him through cold water that is sdaid to be not allowed today

so latert they go to check on him and hes broke outta huis bondage like f--kin rasputin b4 the brits and soviets iced him and escaped and chick comes by but hes out

we're only half thrpough? this is kinda dragging

so trent turns to marie lagrande whos successtful in things and needs her help as a last ressort

shes mad at him bringing devolved i mena devault i mean deval i mean duval and trent sez he needs to use him to find out ABOUT FDRONZO

she has a drink with him and praises him foir being strong even thoguhg hes french and thus evolutionarily challenged and wants to know of his brave things

next to the strange's home is trents place and hes away from the main people where he keeps animals in the basement for experimnents

is this gonna go fullmetal alchemist?

so later a guy climbs the wall of the house and to the window and its froneowho sees chick at her window

he comes in and she sez she went to the nut house to see him but he was gone

he explains he wiggles outta his bondage and we see it in fleshback anduses the sheets to make a rope to climb outthe window

we see a cool silhouette of him on a bridge with a light sky and him and the bridge being dark and its like german expressionism a bit

he gets down this railed off area on the sheets he took and climbs down and gets to a wondow, then goes down to ground leveland comes here after getting cleaned up

she asks what his gfs name was and he sez felice norcross and he last saw her in fal 180s, to him a year ago

she shows him the newspaper saying 1922 amd he realizes all hhe knew is gone and hes a stranger in a foreign land

hes bummed and she saez uncle sez hes froim the great beyond, not the mysterious beyond from the land before time sequels and sahe needs his help to find her dad

frozomo gets a semnse from beyond that he has to save her dad and i think theres a flashback of him fighting the sailor and being left on the boat

he sez howew he keeps dreaming of his gf asking to save her dad and something kept him back, but instinct sez he knows her and she sez if he loves her to help find her dad

he sez he does and he will andsmooches her and goews out te window

so she comes down and asks  uncle nerd about felice w/e frozmos gf was named and he sez its her great grandma's name was norcross and her sister felice was lost at sea

she asks if anyone who bit it can come back and he thnks if footage from lkuike 30 mins ago with em finding the fromo and how his soul sunk back into his corpse

he thinks of reincarnation and how souls who left b4 finishing something cvome back

what is this? the crow?!

so in trents lab the trenat calls and sez he has news of missing dad and to meet him at the lab

2 guys come and he has thei coats taken and marie takes their coats from trent handing em to her and then chick and uncle come in

the 2 guys were cops and its said that theuy think the dad prof strange was iced by froxxzo and his turning back wwas a lie

oh and frozmo was there and sez some guy knoewws prof strange dad wasnt weith em but they need more than his word

marie is cuddling duval and i think they b0ned and he comes out and sez frozmo iced him as there was not enuff food for all of them

he gives items from the body he claims he took froim the body and chcik sez they were her dads

frozone is charged with icing dr strange and he sez he never saw him and there is a conspirtacy against him

he's taken off and tells devual to tell the truth, which he does and sez he got the items from grande marie

well i ddint see this comming, normally they have the false witness hold out until its nearly too late and something big shockls him into it

so i think they arrwst devolved devalut and in da house i think the ttrent comes in2 chicks room and sez hes taking her to frozomo to help as per nerds orders

she dont buy it and waves in a driver and who comes up and calls for help as trent has caught her

driver and trent catch her and put her in a blanket and carry her to da car and hide her under the seat

there a maid in the house and she saw no thing and later 2 guys come to the house andf see a rat on the stairs

they find a pocket tripped from a shirt and iut has crawford stranged initals on it and find a hidden passage undere the stairs

the people under the stairs?!

btw this is a dark mruky hgouse and not much light so its rough to see whats what but it might bne intentional as it adds to the moiod and theme

in the hidden area they find a passage and find proffer strandge who was kept prisoner and tortured for a year by trtent

he has a pet rat and i think sent it out to help himand sez treat was hear 30 mins ago and wanted him to sign his property over to convert into money

he sez he gave him everything and trent sez he's gonna drug chick and make her marry him to get her share

they go off to save the chickand treant has her caught and is gonna inject her with his aids or w/e but forzone comes in and lets her go for no reason

she runs to frozone and frozomomofights ttrent and punches him in the ear but driver grabs trtrent i mean zrozen man and treant punches him

man the fighting is cr-ppy

she runs out and driver goes after her and trent and frosty fight and break through the cr-ppy woofd door and around trhe outside

then they are at a cliff that came outta nowhere and fight on it and nearly fall off and frozeno beats treant over the edge

trent seez chick and goes to save her from driver and evantuallty she gets off in a canue but thetres a f--king waterfall right over there

frozeno goes in da water and swims after her, but more slifes in the water

somehow he catches up to her despire her being in a boat made for water and him body moving and catches her canoe and holds it near the edge

is he spiderman?!

so the boat goes on to the edge and he fklip[s it as hes a caveman with sduperhuman powrrs and holds her as the boat goes over

he swims with her on his back as driver watches and gets her to a rock ad i thinkj shes bit itsomehow

he brings her back on land and she's alive and hugs him andf then we cut to him reading a book by the house and chick comes out and they read arthur conan doyle 

he thinks they loved each other in a past life and are meant for each other and  1 guy sez "the great teachers from zopproaster to Moses to Jesus who made ciilization possible taiught of immortal souls and reincarnation"

i'm pretty sure Moses and Jesus did NOT terach that

unless this is like one of those redefining things like saying David and Jonathanwere in love

See also Roy Mustang and Ed Elric in FMA, Rick Hunter and Roy Fokker in Robotech, and Jim and Jock in Huckleberry Finn

In other words: Non Canon!!

As for Batman and Robin: you never know when the comic guys retcon things

They did it to batwoman, wonder woman, one of the robins and supewrman jr

imagine Batman in the Batcave thinking: they're turning heroes, who's to knwo when i'm next! 9Behind him is the Joker about to hit him with something long and blurred out)

sop frozono sez their love is so good it will always be and we see the ghost of her great grand aunt come on her

they hug and hold each other

the end

That was pretty good

not the best i've seen and it takes a bit to get going, but its not bad

the editng could be better but iu think there were frames missing

its got things inspiring encino man and demolition man and captain america

i hear it was made to help patch up the relasationshup of arthur conan doyle and harry houdini after they f'd out ffrom doyle believuing in scams of fake psychics and jharry trying to explsain its fake

its like telling a guy wrestling isnt real

him; people get hurt!

me: they also get hurt in movies, plays, ballet,

him; have you ever beemn in a fight? have you ewver been in a smackdown??

bbut this was a good mystery film and i think thew whole "fish outrta water, unknowing of this new age" thing wasan't used as much as he had no reason to think its been so long asnd he went with it

it had some good twists and i didn'rt se most of em comming and it stands out from the pack with those

i only saw it as on brad meltzers decoded he mentioned houdini's films and i decided to look ewm up

glad i saw this one, it was different and had some good stuff

For The Man From Beyond 2 I want hhim to become something of a celeb with his actually living in the past and telling of how things really were, but the things he says dn't synchro with what the mainstream says and the media tries to have him wacked to cover their cover uyp, so he goes all ninja on em and finds a secrewt group trying to control things by handling what info is allowed from the past, and now he uses his 1700s/1800s skills to kick a55 and take em on in the roaring 20s! Its also an 8 bit platform game like Phantom 2040 on Game Gear but on Nes, gameboy, Sega Genesis I meaN gAME gEAR AND mAXTER sYSTEM, tg16, atari lynx and 780-0 wjere you go around woith jumping and fighting and solving traps and puzzles and take on the group trying to lead hmanity away from Ther Truth, in the end they fuse into aa huge flesh monster and you gotta use your ssecret ABILITY OF kI aTTACKS FROM fNGERS TO HIT ITS VITAL AREAS AND MAKE IT IMNPLODE AND F OFF CAPS lockl i hate you sodomizing my letters, go to a c0nd0m factory and get filled with used spurm!

Game Reviews Volume 24 From 2022 Part V

Another bunch of reviews on games I played and most of em I beat from August to the end of September

Just beat Fullmetal Alchemist: Dual Sympathy on DS. Its a Beat Em Up based on the 00s anime and has several Minigames to unlock. 2 buttons are Attack and 2 are Jump and you use the Touch Screen to do Alchemy by tapping the left/right corners. Touch the center to choose from other Alchemy you unlocked.  Sometimes you gotta draw a Transmutation Circle on the Touch Screen to get past a part. You get infinite Tries as you an Choose Continue when you bite it and it puts you in the last screen you came into, even on a boss fight. Its not only wailing on guys, but sometimes you gotta tap the screen to use Alchemy at the right  time in the right area to make the boss vulnerable or wait for him to attack and you use a Cannon Alchemy. Its got good stills from the show and some parts are voiced by the cast. Other than the 90s dub of DBZ, I think FMA was the only thing funimation did right, but I haven't seen most of their work as I prefer cool anime like Devilman and Cutey Honey and Hokuto No Ken and the Slayers OAV's and Urotsukidoji and Kekko Kamen and Yugioh. I missed a bunch of eps  of the anime but did see the 00s movie with Fritz Lang so this filled me in a bit. This has good music and art and graphics and plays pretty well but some things are hidden so you outta watch a longplay if you don't wanna  wander around for a while. It saves but only has 1 file and it restarts the story mode and you gotta start over when you finish the game. Some boss fights are  withstanding their attack as their life burns as they attack. This is a solid game and is better if you like the show. It cost a bit but I'm glad I did it.

Just beat Rainbow Islands Extra on my 218 Sega Genesis Games Multicart. What an Ordeal! This is one of the most angering games I've played. Its the sequel to Bubble Bobble where you play as this fat kid who can't run fast or jump well, but can throw rainbows to walk up or hit enemies with. You can get Power Ups like Shoes to run faster, Red jars to give up to 2 more Rainbows or Orange jars to make the rainbows form faster by eating enemies, but if you touch an enemy you bite it in 1 hit and lost it all. Enemy's don't resummon but that's not good as you need em to get more power ups. If you take too long the water starts to rise  but it only happened to me once. You gottta get to the top of all 40 levels with every 4 levels being 1 Island. Also you resummon on the boss if you fall on him, but have no power ups so its harder. You get 2 Continues but it SAYS 3 on the screen as I think it counts the 1st run as a Continue, but that's NOT what Continue means! It means RESUME! If I open a book to start I'm not RESUMing! To quote Megatron: Its either lying or stoopid! You end enemies by hitting em with Rainbows but if you Touch it with a jump, it breaks and falls and takes out any enemies close and collects Items it falls on. If you beat a guy by breaking it, You can get Gem. Get all 7 Rainbow Crystals in each Island and you can access the last few levels, And get them in the last 3 to get the good ending. The problem is: sometimes they don't give you the last Gem and you can either continue playing a game you can't finish, or restart the whole thing! And this is a long game! Its WELL over an hour! And unlike the Master System one, there's no Passwords, Saves or Codes! I did it on Easy and it took me several days to get it done. On Normal the bosses are too fast and attack more. Plus the control is bad! If you fall, you can only inch to the side and often fall into enemies. Also if you tap toward a Rainbow, you speed to the top, often into death. The game DEMANDS perfection and ANYthing less is met with failure. Its awful to make it far, only to be 1 Jewel off from making it and all enemies are gone. After you bite it, when you resummon you are invincible for a bit and touching enemies Jewels em, but it doesn't last long. Its got nice bright colors and the music is a rip off of Over The Rainbow from Oz, but the gameplay kills it. Often I'm in a situation there's no way out of and I bite it. Now that I beat it I never wanna play it again. I hate this game and want it and anyone involved to burn in the black pits of Dante's Inferno. Oh and if you get all 7 Jewels or get enough points you get an extra guy. And when you fall off a Rainbow or platform, you slowly fall until you reach something to stand on, which can take a while as many levels are long blank voids where you use Rainbows to crawl to the top. There's a mode where you can do the main 7 levels but it ends with "play the extra mode". Also 1 button is Jump and 1 is Rainbow and you can change em around in options but you use A/B to change things instead of the D Pad. Oh and you can start with 7 guys per go but you can only have up to 9 lives at most. If you get the Gems in the right order you can get permanent upgrades but I found it better to try to get all the Gems fast so you don't miss it.

Just beat Grind Stormer on my 218 Genesis Games Multicart. Its a Shmup where A/C is fire and B is nuke. Its 6 worlds and after that it Loops. You get up to 5 Continues normally but if you Hold A/B/C on the Title Screen and tap Start 100 X you get the option for Free Play in Continues which means Unlimited. And you'll NEED em as this is a fast and hard game. If you bite it you return to a Checkpoint but if you use a Continue, you Still return to the Checkpoint but you get a Full Power thing that lasts until you bite it. 1 touch and ur iced and returns to no power ups, but you restore to 3 Nukes and the Full Power thing gives you 1 more. Using a Nuke makes you invincible wile its blasting. Its got nice graphics and good music but has some inconsistent slowdown which can help but theres a LOT of enemy shots to dodge but a Nuke clears em. I beat it with over 20 Game Overs and using a Turbo Pad to Auto Spam Start so it could be Slow Mo and it was still challenging. You get Power Ups like Missile and Search, which is the best as it auto targets the enemies, and you get several Options that follow you around. You collect POWER capsules that increase your attacks but if you collect another Weapon type it replaces your current one. I liked it but its quite hard, even with Infinite Continues and a Pseudo Slow Mo. Glad I did this one but its a Challenge.

Just beat Rise of the Robots on Sega Genesis. Its a Fighting Game where you play as the worst character and fight the other 6 without Continues. A B C is Punches of Light to Hard and X Y Z are Kicks of the same. On a 3 button pad Start switches between em. Also they all look the same but have different speeds. In 2Pmode 1 is always the main guy who looks like Pepsiman and 2 is never him. You press the D Pad in directions, but don't do it too fast, then press any button for special moves but its hard to pull off. Often you can exploit the AI by standing in a corner and holding Back, then kicking to make em jump attack, then kicking again when they are blocked. After a move hits, you or him or both move back, so some guys can be beat my tapping H Kick and taking a step so ur outta range of his counter. The 2nd guy can be beat by couching and hammering H Punch as he walks into t. The 2nd last guy can be beat with Down, Up, Attack, to do a headbutt, but you gotta press Attack b4 you jump from Up. I beat him by walking close, ducking and using Heavy Punch him in the parts like Jean Claude or Johnny Cage as he jumped over me with kicks. But it didn't always work and if he got too far too 1 side he'd get me in a corner and wail on me. If you block you still take damage but its less. The enemies can beat you in like a few hits and block often, but if you play smart, you can out think em. The game boss is the easiest as you only gotta hold Back and H Punch when she deflects off. There's also a Training Mode where you choose 1 enemy and face him that you can do to lean their moves. Its not so bad once you know how to manage the bad AI and learn to counter em. Its actually got impressive 90s CG Graphics like Beast Wars but in some ways: Better, But they didn't have to do 26 eps. The music is good and 1 guy from Queen did 1 song. It can be beat in like 20 mins but is tough, Like Contra. The gameplay isn't unplayable and the credits mention other consoles. Glad I played this.

Just played Ys II: Ancient Ys Vanished – The Final Chapter for NES/Famicom on my DS R4. Its a dir4ect Sequel to the 1st one where 1 button is Item, 1 is Wand, Start Pauses and Select opens a Menu. Its an Action RPG where you fight by ramming into enemies at a bit off center to beat em, or use a Magic Wand to use a Fire Shot or other things. You buy Armor and Weapons and Shields to boost stats and can use Items to advance. There's good 8 bit Graphics and nice Music as well as it Controlling Nice. You gotta Grind a lot to get strong enough to get through, but its not bad and can be done by fighting the same guys in an area that resummon when you go offscreen. The Bosses you usually beat by firing a Magic Fire Attack as walking into em damages you. Its best to use a guide as there's some maze like areas and some things don't tell you what to do. If stuck, try various items. Around halfway through the game, After the Ice Area Boss, My game glitched out, I can walk anywhere and the area is ghosted over, I can't leave and can walk into enemies but am like in another plane of existence, I reloaded my save state on my DS R 4 and f'd with the settings but its always the same. Like with Y's 4 on Snes. I wanted to beat this, but I did my best and tried. My 1st time I got caught where the Door to the Ice Area wouldn't open so I Restarted and went Right in the Door instead of going back for a Healing Flower. Its a good game I'd like to have finished. Glad I tried it. You can save almost anywhere and can heal in some areas by standing still, but you need the Robe from a cave in the side of a wall on the Ice Level to do it anywhere. If you bite it you reload from 1 of 2 save files to use. Despite being called The Final Chapter, it had many sequels, Like Horror Movies.

Just beat Return of the Ninja for GBC on my DS R4. Its kind of a platform action game where you play as a Male or Female Ninja and fight through 6 levels with unlimited tries. But you gotta beat each in 1 guy or you gotta start the level over. 1 button is Jump, 1 is Attack and Select uses a Magatama Bead you collect to do a Super Attack and Start Pauses. You can collect Items you keep until you bite it that let you do more things like Walk on Water, Burrow through Ground, Do a Super Jump by holding Down for a bit, Cling to Ceilings like Spider Man, or Glide on a Cloth like Mario's Cape in Mario 3. They are always in the sane area and you an get Rice Balls or Magatama Beads from slaying enemies. Holding Attack lets you charge up and fire a Shuriken  and crouching then pressing Jump lets you back flip. If an enemy sees you and you don't end him fast enough, the security gets tight and you got more enemies and obstacles, but you can undo this by going in and out of doors. Its got nice 8 Bit graphics and cutscenes that look good and fitting Japanese Music. It can be tough but with unlimited tries you only gotta keep at it til you get good or lucky, but some levels are kinda mazes so I say look up a guide if you get lost. Its not bad and can be beat in like half an hour on a perfect run, but you'll probably spend more redoing things. Glad I played this. Oh and its by Natsume and is said to be based on Shadow Of The Ninja, but I think both are quite different in Gameplay, style and story.

Just beat Wendy: Every Witch Way for Game Boy Color on my DS R4. Its a Platform game by WayForward who's usually great and had nice color and music with kinda good Digitized Speech. A is Jump and B is a Magic Blast that can be improved into a Spread Shot by collecting Stars that also work as Extra Hits. You get Unlimited Continues and 5 Guys for each to get through it, and using a Continue makes you restart the area instead of from a Checkpoint, but the game isn't too hard. Using Up ore Down and Jump lets you flip Gravity and enemies are in it too, and you gotta use this to get through areas to the end. Theres a 4 character Password and it comes up between levels and  its colored shapes. Spikes end you in 1 hit but if you are careful, its not too hard to get through with enough Trial and Error. I played the 1st 3 Acts but the game kept freezing so I couldn't do the flying levels, But I was able to play the 3 bonus levels that can only be done on GBA and they were the hardest. I eventually got through em and the Credits plays and it said The End. So I'm gonna count it like how I beat Super Mario 64 without getting all the stars or doing the clock level, or beating Super Hang On without doing all the tracks, Or beating Street Fighter II without using every character. Its a good game and has nice visuals and style. Its based on The Wendy The Good Witch from the Casper Series and was gonna be for a new show of it, but the show didn't get made and the game is all we got. Its well made and plays well and has a good feel and style while being forgiving. the levels aren't long and you can do em in bite sized missions then Resume with a Password. If it didn't freeze on emulation I'd have had more fun, but what I experienced was a good one.

Just beat Billy Hatcher and the Giant Egg on GameCube. Its by the guys who made Sonic Adventure and plays similar. You play as Billy who looks like my cousin Aiden and roll around huge eggs you enbiggen by running over fruits and they do higher damage but more a bit harder.  A is jump, B fires the egg but it comes back unless its off a cliff or if its thrown in the air, X and Y use Animals you Hatch from the egg, L centers the Camera, R hatches the egg if ready but if moving lets you rush. Using  A in a jump lets you bounce and can go higher, The C Stick moves the camera and if you Rush and Jump you can do a long jump. Its got bright cheerful colors and nice music that I can't understand most of the words, and its story is like Rock A Doodle where this kid gets in an animal thing and fights evil birds by getting these good birds to crow and the sun comes back.  There's like 7 worlds you gotta do various mission on to get these Emblems like in Sonic Adventure and in the Eggs you hatch, you can get power ups or these Neopet looking things that have abilities based on elements like Ice and Electricity that can clear obstacles or wipe out enemies and can be used up. You have 3 Save Files and it saves after every area beat. Also are Coins to find and with enough you can summon Sega Characters instead of the Neopets, but you gotta find quite a few. You can also hatch eggs that have Minigames to play on GBA with a connection cable. You usually only gotta do the 1st 2 levels to Hatch the Golden Egg to free the bird, and the other one  to beat the boss, but you can unlock more missions by saving your friends in those missions. I didn't like the Game Salesman Missions of collecting coins as it was kinda annoying and the Free 8 Chickens as it was kinda long. If you bite it, you return to a checkpoint and all opened areas/collected items are there. The camera is kinda bad but not as bad as Mario 64. If you are moving and a wall goes on the camera, it moves like the wall is stopping it, then where you are aiming is changed and you can fall off. It could use some control tuning, but I had a decent time with it. Sometimes you gotta roll an egg down a rail and the egg falls through. Also it can be hard to judge where to go in the 3D. Its not the worst but I think Sonic did it better. Its got a fun style and feel and some parts are kinda fun. But if you meat a goal, like beat 100 foes,  then you gotta still go to the Emblem and that can be a while off. Also Billy can't do much w/o an egg and if you jump wrong, you can have the egg stuck on a ledge you fall off. I often have dreams of playing Sonic 2 and going through rings in a Bonus Level and going under water or in a night sky thing or by a beach and I think its was foretelling this as you go through Rings and jet around. Overall its not bad and if you run outta guys you reload the save file, also you can farm lives by hatching the right eggs as each egg always gives the same thing based on where its found. I'm glad I did this. Its lite, cheerful and has a good 00s innocence of it. A bit of tuning and it would be great.

Just beat Lady Sia on GBA, Its an action game where you play as this blonde chick who's kinda french and can turn into a Sasquatch Giantess that looks like the Catgirl from Darkstalkers in some bosses. A is jump, B is Sword and after beating certain areas or getting certain items, you can use L R and the D Pad with A/B to do things like a combo or cast a spell that uses up Magic, but the only one I remembered to use was the Water Magic that makes you invincible for a bit. in Sasquatch Mode L and Left/Right is a Charge and R is Block and Jumping and I think A or B makes you slam the ground. If you use B and hold it, it charges a Magic Attack and it goes for a bit before poofing out. Its Got good Graphics and colors and controls mostly well but often its tricky to catch a ledge or go off without catching it. The D Pad up activates switches and goes in or out of doors, and up/down lets you look around. In each level you got things to do like collecting Gems or freeing captives and if you beat it with Full L:ife/Magic and all Gems/Captives, you get a Perfect Score, If you get Perfect on each Level you unlock more levels but its not needed to beat the game. If you reach a Checkpoint then each time you bite it, you resummon with the same Life/Magic/Gems/Freed Guys but if you made it with 1 hit left, you gotta be careful. There's Unlimited Continues and it saves after each Level. I thought it was pretty good and it came out around the start of the GBA. I recall reading a Nintendo Power Advance Magazine that mentioned it to promote the upcoming GBA along with Super Mario Advance, Castlevania Circle of the Moon, Pinobee and Hot Potato. Its got a style that's like a more impressive GBC thing and is a bit more experimental in looks than later games. Its also got that European feel and some of that late 90s attitude. some parts are kinda annoying but its more forgiving than you'd think. Oh and the story is pretty nice too. Glad I got this one. Its a solid 2D adventure.

Just beat Ninja Cop AKA Ninja Five-O on GBA. Its by Hudson and Konami and you got Unlimited Tries to get through 5 worlds of 4 levels each. If you bite it you start the level over but they can be beat in a few mins once you know how to do it. A is Jump, B is Attack with Ninja Stars, but you can upgrade 2x, although getting it lowers the Level, Holding L lets you look around with the D Pad and  R is a Sword, A and B uses a Super Move that you gotta build a Power Bar by icing guys. Enemies don't resummon, except Bats sometimes and you gotta get Colored Keys to open the Colored Doors. You also gotta rescue captured guys and attack at the right time or you ice em. A i\n the Air lets you use a Ninja Chain to swing from or climb onto and A when crouching is a Slide. I played it on Easy as I think it was the Default thing and the game stopped after Level 3 as you gotta do it on Normal to get the last part. I hate that. Imagine if I started watching a movie  but because I came in the wrong door, it  ended half way through? So I played through again and got the To Be Continued again as it was already on Normal and by pressing the D Pad, it went to Easy, So I played through a 3rd time and after beating the 3rd area took a break. On the next night I went through the last 2 areas and these were pretty brutal. Often I kept going into doors over and over because I hit Up when I pressed Jump and Jump again or Attack to aim. Its not impossible but it gets pretty irritating. Nice Colors and Music and it controls pretty well often, but that Ninja Chain gets kinda tricky to do. If you Chain and are against the wall, Using the D Pad has you move a bit off and Jumping can let you go higher. But it was kinda tricky to pull off.  Overall its a well made game and is pretty fun, until it devolves into 2 hit kills and cheap hits. Although you can Quit the Level any time to start over. Oh and some levels have you start with the same Power and Life as when you ended the last. Glad I did this.

Just beat Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Games on DS. Its kind of a mini game collection where you play different events using various controls like the buttons or touch screen that doesn't always work. you pay as around a dozen Mario and Sonic Characters and each has their own stats like Speed, Power Stamina and Skill that help you do better in some rounds. Often you gotta run by rubbing the Touch Screen in a pattern and use the D Pad or L/R Buttons. Some events like the Triple Jump or Javelin throw were tricky as the touch screen wouldn't register the slice. There's regular events like the normal Olympics and Dream Events with more Video Game things like Items and Special Attacks. There's a Free mode to play any game 1 at a time and a Mission mode that has each character do some thing I never tried. In the Circuit mode you play a few predetermined Minigames and doing better gets more points, At the end, whoever has more points wins. Also you can have a Coin thing you can use once per tournament that doubles your points gained from that event, so use it in one you are good at. 1 thing that bugs me is if you wanna quit or start over with the same contestants, you can't do it between rounds, so if you screw up, you gotta hammer buttons to get to the next one and THEN start for options. Also there's a lot of cutscenes of the characters before and after matches you gotta tap the screen to get through. The Graphics are nice and theres voices and music from both series that works well. Even if you get last place in an event, you can make up for it in others. Each event has instructions to read before starting. Overall its a pretty nice game and is a good Crossover of the 2 franchises. Glad I did this one. Oh and I only used Sonic Characters except Robotnik.

Just beat Pokemon Puzzle League on N64. Its a Puzzle Game where you move the icon around and swap blocks with A or B and match 3 or more in a vertical or horizontal line. If you get multiples or have blocks fall and match, you get to dump a line on the opponent that they gotta match at least 3 blocks next to and turn it into normal blocks. Thicker lines need to be done one row at a time. If the blocks get over the top of the screen its game over but you got unlimited continues so you can play til you get good or lucky. You play as the main guy from the anime before he devolved with the bad art style and its got the season 1 and some of 2 voices from the 4Kids dub. L and R make the blocks rise faster so you have more blocks to match but the screen slowly rises as the game goes on, unless you make a match, then it stops for a sec, but you can still makes moves so it can get you enough time to get through. If you play on Easy it says "try Normal, But after "beating" it on Normal, the game stops near the end and says "try Hard", which kinda bugs me. I hate how games don't let you finish the game on Easy or Normal, Why even have the mode if you can't beat the game on it? Imagine you won a trip to Japan, but the ticket only goes to california and to get the rest of the way, you gotta go to new york and get a different ticket! But that only goes to hawaii, so you gotta go back to new york to get the REAL one! I mean its not that hard a game,but having to go back and redo the whole thing as I was on the wrong mode is kinda gay. Then there's a Harder Mode but I got the credits and its only more of the same kind of battle so Imma count it as beat. You don't need to get all the Stars in super mario 64. Also you can choose how many rounds there are but I did 1. There's also a 3D mode with you do it in a Cylinder and loop around, but I prefer 2D. I liked this and this is how the 32/64 Bit Generation should have been: Better looking 16 Bit Games and not bad 3D.