Equus Review

norte; you know my typing s-cked. it aint changin
equus
this is my review on equus
I recall the hairy potter actor played in it
this is the 70s movieit starts with a naked man making out with a horse
interspecies romance?
well this is the 21st century so its not like we can dislike it anymore
this guy gives a wordy monologue about being a horse on the inside
I assume he's a furruy
nowadays we got fursuits
but this is the 70s so he cant deal with his orientation
this movie has Richard burton
I recall him doing some cr-ppy shakespere or w/e and saying
man and wife! horse and mare! b--ch and dog!!
he seems to be in a nuthouse
I think he's a dr there
this teen is sent there cuz he eye b0ned 6 horses with a metal spike
6 horses?!
spike?!
this is my little pony, friendship is magic!
I think that show is entertaining kinda like tiny toons
but I'm not a brony
speaking of bronies...
I heard a fun story from norse legend
Ioki was having another one of his god bets
heet the gods couIdnt finish buiIding a waII in time
so the due date was aImost there and the gods were aImost done
so Ioki(being a god) shapeshifted into an attractive femaIe horse and seduced the main workhorse and made Iove with him aII night
in the am, the horse was too tired to work right and the waII wasnt done in time
Ioki was pregnant from his night of hot horse Ioving and he Iater gave birth to an 8 Iegged magic horse
he gave it to odin which he used often
He got to be a sexy horse
he got to b0ne a sexy horse
he got horse pregnant
he has a magic horse child
this is Iike various bronies dreams come true
although I have a few brony friends
theyre ok
they aint the extreme bronies though
they just like the show and find some horses cute
so the horse b0ning guy is interviewed and keeps singing 70s jingles
later the Richard burton talks about some ritual sacrifice thing
ooh
he mentions the Mycenae
I recall em mentioned in Mazinger
hes ritual sacrificing kids to ensure a good harvest
sounds like stem cell research and global warming stuff combined
oh its a dream
the horse b0ning guy has a horse picture in his bedroom
better than spoons like with tommy wiseau
its mentioned the pagans thought the horse and rider counted as one person
well, the mongols were super skilled at mounted archery so I can see how they'd get that idea
they also say something about the bible and a verse that mentioned horses
wait, I think this is the home of the horse b0ning guy's rents
the mom reads him the bible and he liked the word "equus" which is some foreign word for horse
the dad thinks the mom's overprotectiveness effed him up
the dr asks about what she told her son about b0ning
she sez its not just biological but spiritual
to be fair, a lot of black arts users use b0ning in their daemon rituals
see also; Urotsukidoji II; Legend of the Demon Womb
the horse b0ning guy talks with the dr about dreams
the dr has f'd up horror dreams about cutting up kids
I got some f'd up dreams 2
one time i had a dream i knew i was dreaming
i had a big knife and i stabbed a guy in the eye and sliced through him slashes on his head(slicing through bone) and he wasnt falling apart so i sliced him into vertical strips and there was like pink-yellow inside his bod.
it was a big serrated knife around 8-14 inches long
later the horse b0ner builds a castle in the sand at the beach and this big black horse comes up with a guy on him
the rider lets the horse b0ner pet his big black horse and gives him a ride
btw, the horses name is TROJAN
I assume they were b0ning in the real version
then they ride into the water
the rider brings him back and his rents are worried
the rider is very manly and has a strong voice
kinda like he-man
the rents pul him off the horse and he gets hurt
then they yell at the rider
the horse b0ner goes mental
turns out this was a flashback
I didn't know it was
they should have like a note on screen that says "2 weeks ago" or w/e
law and order did it well with the date and place thing
although the noise kinda scared me as a kid
the horse b0ner sez he never rode a horse besides that time
at night the horse b0ner sez into a tape recorder that the horse riding was sexy
the next day he describes his experience with the horseriding
the mom tells the dr that the horse picture in his room replaced a picture of Jesus at Calvary
the dad tore it down but the kid freaked out
so they put it back
I had some issues as a teen
thankfully my rents never gave in to my insanity
and I recovered
I feel bad for people whop's rents don't love them enough to help them
if I'm anorexic and you give me surgery to remove organs to be lighter its not fixing the issue
later the dr goes to the stable and the horse owner sez he wishes he murdered the boy
that's reasonable
killing a guy for wounding an animal
like that kevin Costner movie
he pulls a knife, you pull a gun! he sends one of yours to the hospital, you send one of his to the morgue!
the horse owner sez the horses were being taken out
AT NIGHT
and were SWEATY
he thinks the kid was riding em
I think that's the film's way of saying he was b0ning em,
later the boy is talking into his recorder and sez the horses talked to him
he sez he became obsessed with the horses movements and looking at em
like a guy who likes fat chix talking about him getting into fat chix and watching my 600lb life
he rambles on more about horses being used by men for shows or work
also them being naked
this is like that SVU ep with the guy with the amputee fetish where he goes on a solid 2 minute monologue about his lusts
the dr talks with the dad about somehow religion playing a part in his sons pre versions
the dad sez 18 months ago he heard his son talking to himself about words relating to horses
he puts on a string like a horse mouth thing and talks about equus being his only begotten son
he then beats himself with a wood coat hanger while pulling on the horse face string
this is some weird a55 SM sh-t
also he's looking at the horse picture and it looks freaky
is... is this a p0rn0e???
I watch a lot of f'd up sh-t
like go nagai and Urotsukidoji
but this is pretty up there
then the horse b0ner talks about meeting a female human at the stable and she got him a job there
he seems to be in his own purvo paradice
oh h-ll no
this horse b0ning kid looks like Bartholomew bond from degrassi jr high
I dont wanna think of that tween gaying out with a horse!
or several horses at once
the female teaches him how to brush horses
ypu just know hes probably got a full on b0ner the whole time
then she leaves to do other work and he's alone with a horse
make that horseS
he stands in the horse penand moves his feel like horses do
the dr asks about if he had dates with the human female but the kid snaps
he makes various comments on the drs secks life in a mean way
the dr tells him to go to his room but he just starts smokig
this punk reminds me of the guy from clockwork orange
later the dr talks with a woman about no one understanding him
the dr never had kids and don't get along with his woman
he wants to go to Greece and talks about his ideas and dreams
later the dr plays a game with the kid where the kid looks at somethimg and opens/closes eyes depending on pencil taps
this is like a weird ritual
the kids been hypnotized
the kid sez the horse said mouth chains hurt an compares it to Jesus
the horse is called equus
the kid kneels on the ground and sez the horse is in chains for sins of the world
and something about horse and rider becoming one
the kid sez the stable is like a church and goes riding
also he has weird horse phrases he says lie a church hymn
he relives his night in the horse place where he b0ned out their eyes
he rides the horse to a place and gets nude
we see his thing btw
I think he wants the horse to do stuff
its gonna bite it off!
he puts a stick imn the horses mouth then his mouth
ten he starts feeling the horse all over
this reminds me of freddy got fingered where tom green was grabbing the horses thing
he has weird religious rituals abouyt feeding and riding the horse naked
the movie doesn't show them b0ning but I'm pretty sure he was
he is very excited at riding him and sez he wants to be inside him and to be him
I think he j-zzed
then they make out
man this is a really f'd up story
I think its based on real events
put it on the history channel
the dr goes on a monologue about the horse saying "why me"
then about how we all start innocent but her twisted by things
later the mom slaps her kid andc the dr makes her leave
she goes on a whiny tirade about parents being blamed for their kids being f'd up
then she pukes
she blames the devil for his pur vustion
the dr sez he's gonna give him a placebo and say its a strong truth drug
the dr sez that society doesn't get him and he's only allowed to "be himself" when he b0nes horses
yeah lets not consider mental illness or chemical/hormone issues
the dr sez the kid has this look in his eyes at them cuz he got to live his dream of fulfilling his fetish
he then whines about his f'd up life and sez his issues are not much different than the horse b0ner
except he's jealous of the kid
his gf then gives him reason and logic and sez he has the power to save the kid
the dr then gives the kid the "truth pill"
he talks about his desire of bathing with the pagan gods in Greece
he asks the kid about the girl but he clams he don't know
he interrogates him further and the girl sez girls find horses sexy
sounds like my little pony
the girl asks him to go see a p0rnoe with her
and she was the only chick in a room fuil of dudes
he compares men looking at the screen to church somehow
then his dad comes in and brings them out
while waiting for the bus the dad sez he was olny there for a poster work job and claims he didn't know they showed those xxx movies
his dad leaves on the bus and he sez he's gonna see the female home
he tells the dr about him realizing men b0ne women
he goes into the stable to b0ne the human female with the horses around
but he cant b0ne a human woman since he kept thinking of the horse
he wanted the horse
she leaves and he asks the horses for forgiveness
aw h-ll no he looks like alex winter from bill and ted
he cant take the horses having seen his sin since he sees horses as gods and he pops their eyes with a sickle
its pretty cool
then the horse owner comes in and knocks him out
the horse b0ner has viet nam seizures from reliving it and the dr sez he'd never see equus again
the dr uts the kid to sleep with a needle(not like a dog. but a tranquilizer) and sez he's gonna make him well
then he sez equus wont leave him easily
this woman sez the dr can heal him but the dr goes on a tirade saying even if he makes him well it isn't right
they try to make him being non insane seem bad
then he talks about him being in chains of mouth and something about being something about equus
the end
that was pretty f'd up
well made
but disturbing and weird
I think its a p0rn0
kinda
like violence jack with all the b0ning and hermaphrodites
ooh
it was made in canada
they got all these weird laws against some p0rnos
some anime is banned these cuz its got SM in it
like cool devices
not sure about night shift nurses
I think its ok after they took out the enemas
for equus 2 I'd like for the horse b0ning guy to have started getting surgery to be made to look more like a horse and start acting more like a real horse. his mom finally finds out and has enough and tries to stop him but the horse b0ning guy wont listen to reason. when he nearly dies from getting injections of horse hormones, his mom has him taen in and has a ritual to free him from demons. The demon possessing him is driven out and the mom has an epic battle with it using holy items and her faith. also equus is really a demon who has been mo lesting his mind to drive him to ruin