Tuesday, September 26, 2017

From The Earth To The Moon Review

warning; my typing is as scientifically accurate as this movie
from the earth to the moon
this is my review of from the earth to the moon(50s ver)
its based on the jules verne book
my dad read me the classics illustrated comic in the late 90s
after the credits are done by looking through a book of em, we get narration saying its in 1868 near new York(new Sodom)
I like 1800s  stories and movies based on books
2 guys meet and go somewhere
one is victor(i'll call him vic after Michael vick)
later at a dinner theres more people and they are there to see something
btw this is in color and fullscreen
no black bars sodomizing the screen
the people are from a guns club
vic sez he has the secrets of the universe
one guy thinks hes into black arts
aka Yugioh
vic sez they made a lotta cash off the war but w/o it they need a new source
and he has a plan to get em new weapon orders
he has a thing called power X that can fire something across countries
thus every gov would want one
and power x is so strong it can destroy the world
is this synchro summoning?
it f'd the planet in Yugioh 5ds
vic wants to use the stuff on da moon
as in shoot at da moon and the burst would be seen from earth
didn't this happen in sonic adventure 2 (battle)?
is power X the chaos emeralds??
vic is pumping his whole fortune into this cr-p
one guy sez vics like Columbus in 1492
elsewhere, George sanders is working on something for general Robert E Lee
a guy asks sanders not to have a duel with vic
oh and sanders is a hero to the south
he and vic have a yugi/kaiba or Goku/vegeta or coke/pepsi thing going
sanders made the hardest metal ever but it couldn't survive vic's blast
the unstoppable force vs the immovable object
the vic stops the duel and sanders (his name in Nicholl) prays to The Lord for help
then we get Nicholl going on a tirade against vic about vic being the bad guy with his power x that can nuke a city
Nicholl made a suit of super armor harder than anything b4 it
this is like sega vs Nintendo
each trying to one up the other
vic accepts
they set up the duel
but instead of Yugioh cards they see if this piece of super metal (cho-tetsu) can withstand power x
is power x antimatter??
it can wipe out a city so... maybe??
btw if it can take out a city then why are they in the area?
get miles away and remote that sucker!
vic sez to get to the bunkers but Nicholl sez its gonna be ok
they fire
son of a b--ch!!
it took off the whole hill!
Nicholl is horrified by its destructive power
later vic has 7 plants making this stuff
well... there goes the planet
it had a good run
btw this may be historical to us in this future century
but jules verne made it for the present
his present
like power rangers being 90s
vic makes a cup of power x and it can take out manhattan
maybe working with something that strong isn't meant for man?
later vic is at some reveal thing and a major gives him a letter
we don't see it but he goes to see the president
I think its Ulysses S Grant
maybe grant sez the non American countries are worried vic's experiments might go wrong and nuke em
vic sez its gay to stop progress cuz it might be used for war
and it might make earth a paradise
didn't that happen in Urotsukidoji?
maybe grant sez to not have a charge in the cannonball (which defeats the purpose of doing it as they cant tell if it hits or not)
and 22 countries say its considering America doing this an act of war
typical big guv stopping hard working citizens from achieving their full potential
also grant was a yankee so that makes sense
he stops his work and everyone thinks hes a fraud cuz he didn't fulfill his thing
theres an angry mob after vic
at the gun club a guy tries to get da truth outta him
they offer vic 4 million + royalties for power x
he declines and sez no one will ever get it
better take a drill to your brain like in Pi
or go out with all remaining notes and product like in Godzilla 0001
later he works on stuff after the gun club turned on him
he brings a piece of Nicholls armor thing that was fused by the test to Nicholl
the Nicholl super metal (glass and metal) can be used to survive firing and friction to let him go to the moon
Nicholl plans to go to the moon with him and nicholls curvy blonde daughter thinks they're nuts
they make a giant gun and bullet to shoot themselves to the moon\
how American
also nicholls daughter is into some guy
shes worried about them incase firing themselves in a giant gun might go wrong
oh and her bf is going too
his name is ben(like ben Cameron from birth of a nation)\
the into the bullet and into gas chambers which slow their heart to 5 beats per minute to reduce shock and help them survive
also the gas chamber tubes spin
holy cr-p that's spinning like a beyblade fast
after a long countdown the chemical x asplodes and the bullet fires off
once far enough into orbit they come out
wait, how would spinning em fast make em slow beat?\
the walk around despite being in space and look out the astrodome to see da moon and stars painted on the background
they have booze and Nicholl is kinda grim
the gyroscope goes f'd and they have gravity issues
this could be used for training in higher gravity to gain strength
its revealed Nicholl sabotaged things to make people fear vic's power x
then these a gas leak
they find the blonde chick in a space suit
shouldn't the launch have iced her?
if not, what was with the spinny thing??\
shes ok and sez she came cuz she worried him and ben wouldn't come back
shes got esp
turns oit the bullet is boosted by rockets that fire in order
Nicholl took out a metal thing and it f'd it all up
they gon aspolode
he did it to save the world
vic gets on a power suit and connects 2 hooks on tubes with sparks
but Nicholl screws it up
blonde sez he decided to nuke the bullet cuz he was jealous  of vic
he attempts to justify himself saying its for the best
she tells vic sorry for her dad and he meant well
hey man, sorry my dad tried to waste ja. he didn't mean it. we cool? homie?
she sez if they gon bite it, at least they bite it cool by getting nuked in space
vic sez if theres anther space flight it should have a chick on it for bravery
spoiler; that don't happen on the alleged moon landing!
they land on te moon I think
they wait to blow apart and vic and Nicholl leave the blonde to b0ne ben
after b0ning, they talk for a bit
nicholl sez vic only wanted to use power x to get rich
and sell it to all countries
but then the next war would wipe out da urth
vic sez with everyone having power x there would be no next war
and countless lives would b saved
and now they all gon bite it and its nicholls fault
they notice the earth and moon are in different places
turns out they only hit an asteroid
the reactor goes mental and electricity beams burn the walls
Nicholl saves vic by shutting off the reactor
thechange their speed and are heading for da moon fast
the Nicholl knocks out the ben and puts the blonde and the ben in a part of the rocket to return to earth
vic smokes a cigar on a space ship(like captain gloval and his pipe on Robotech)
the reactor goes and the rocket hits the moon and the burst brightens the sky
cool moon shots of going over the surface
the news gets word of it and plan to say it was all faked and vic is alive somewhere
blonde and ben survive as the rocket part they are on came off
vic sets off flares on the moon to show hes still alive and made it
but its on the other side of the moon and its meant to show blonde and ben they live
what if blonde and ben were asleep?
at earth gun club guys disagree if vic made it or faked it
they ask one guy who sez he deals in imagination
hes jules verne
what a twist
the end
that was good
I mean after Robotech we got higher tech sci fi
but this was a good period piece about retro sci fi
good story and acting
I recalled some stuff from the book almost 20 years ago
put this on the history channel
its actually good
for from the earth to the moon 2 i'd like it to be about vic and Nicholl on the dark side of the moon and finding space demons living there. they use their wits and science to evade them while waiting for ben and the blonde to make another ship to rescue em. turns out, they had a space ship built b4 incase the 1st one got f'd. no. it was the prototype ship and its not known to be fully working. also the space demons on the moon want to use vic's power x to wipe out da urth. then in from the earth to the moon 3 I want the space demons to have remade power x from the remains of the space ship and are sending troops with power x blasters to wipe out da urth. but the countries have banded together to ake power x powered suits made of nicholls super metal and its an all out war between humans and moon demons. also several countries have betrayed earth to fight with the moon demons to gain power and status as the new rulers.

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