Note; I sp[ell fuuruticstic
future hunters
this is my review on future hunters from 1986 (the year the Robotech II The Sentinels was gonna happen)
Its got Robert Patrick from Terminatioor 2 asnd Double Dragon and no one else i know
its directal by Cirio H. Santiago who did Equalizer 2000, The Expendables(from 88), Bloodfist 2050 and other cr-p I never saw
This is one of Robert Patriocks 1st films and he's pretty cool
I never saw this b4 buit its on Comet and I think it could be good
so narrator sez its 2025 and th workld is sh-t. But the Spear used to pierce the side of Jesus is the only hope
now this guy is tyrying to find it and theres wasteland warriors and sh-t from fist of the north star
so this main guy drives a bada55 car as bikers chase him across the road in the desert oif probably soviet california
he uses an arrow with a thing on it to bllow the car chasing himbut more warrtiors come after him and aim guns
btw,. 2025 is when Transformers Victory happened
so then main guy is in a base and beating up guys and capping em with a big a55 gun
hes in a temple and its surrounded and tanks get called in
main guy finds a glowing blade and tanks attack the temple
then credits to epic music
then its the late 80s and this chic in at this stone place witgh a guy to nice music
she has exams and needs more info from looking at a rock wall and guy wants to watch a ball game
he sez ever since her dad bit it she's lost her way
then some bikers get em and fight the guuy and beat himn down
main guy wakes up in the area the couple just was and bikers catch the chick
main guy fightsd da bikers and gets shot but walks it off as the bikers dissolve into goo
bf comes too and he and chick take maIN GUY TYO THE DR
they sez they out of l a but he dont know what that is and he sez they need to join the sppear and the shaft and asks what date is
they say june 12 1986 and he sez theres a holocost comming
then the future guy bites it, huh, i thought he was the main guy
so later guy sez to chick he got a dcrop dusting job and she sez she found stuff about the names future guy gaev em
then this blonde guy cvome in and se he wants the spearhead and his minion busts the place up a bit
then some people come by and blonmde guy sez he's gonna be back later
the people outsiode leave and she goes to the university to look into things
proffesser sez he lost contact with a guy and they show him da spear head and he wants it but teens say its entrusted to em
proffesser sez he can get the guy to get in tough with them and she gives him her number
they drive on and noitice they being followed and the chasers open fire on em
bf wants to give up the spearhead but chick dont wanna and they gotta find this guy
so the car chasing them crashes and blows and burns and the heroes go to asia and are diven by not bruce lee
so in this building hotel some guys catch her and bf and not bruce klee save her by icing the guys
bf gets a guy in a lock and grills him AND he sez this expedition was missing in the Venus Valley, a place with amazion warriors of legend
later the couple in in bed in undies but not b0ninbg and bf nearly wacks a telegram guy who comes over with a note inviting them to dinner
mwanwhile, blonde guys boss b--hes at himover getting nucular stuff and sattilites and other sh-t nto wipe out the people on urth he dont like
oh and they're nazis (or nat zeds in soviet canada)
at dinner blkonde comes over and sez hes a dsr's aid and they try to back out and run
blonded pulls a gun and theres a chase and a fight and blonde catchs chick and takes her off
bf beats guys out and jacks a jeep and goes after em
then its dday and i guess he was driving all night and he busdts intoi a home and starts wastting guys with blades and guns
he finds the professer and as a nazui andhes got the real professer they were lookjing fgoirt and girlk at gunpoint
real guy sez no one know where the blade isd and only the shaft is in the valley, but fake proff shows hes got it
fake prof and blonde guy leave em in tthe room and take off in a choppper and the couple free real prof
tthen the chopper fires bullits and misiles at the homeas the good guys esacape
THE COUPLE GETS A CHOPPER AND FINDS NOTES IN IT to an island on a map
they fly and bad guys chopper sees em and calls em on radio and tells em theres a charge under the seat
they jump out anbd the chopper blows (Why did you tell them!? yuu eeee deee ottt!!) and they land in water
so they go to a plane place and bf ties up a guy and he jacks this plane
they fly there and have only 11 parachute and no place to land so they ditch da stolen plane and share it with him hugging her
pretty sure she'd slip ourt whjen the chute goes and splatter
so now they in da jungle and fall down a thing after frewakjing outr from a big a55 snake and wind up at gunpoit bby the bad guys
so they're tied up and not ewxecuted for some reason and some hoprse riders bsaattl;e the nazies weith guns vs spears
the main guys get away and dda nazies follow and bf sneak attacks 2 and shreds em woth a gun
the sound gets the others attentionb and they run and cross a bridsge
bf takes out guys cropssing da breidge but falls throiugh and grapples a guy as gf runs
her gets out and 1 guy has a grenade go off and blowws the bridge and he climbs bacxk up
they go on and see the horse guys and go into a cave and al;ll these people come ouit and catch em
the cave people know ewhere the vallley is but needs help to figfht some guy bugging em for years
so they go out and the came guys and bf take outthjese guys with steallth and sneak attaCKS LIKE CAVEMAN NINJA but noit joe asnd mac
the chick uses a crossbow to take a guy out and the cave guys save bf from tthe sword weilding enemys as he sword fights em
Man tthis is like a silent film as its no chat all action
so aafter like 20 mins of killing, the midget cave guys bring them to the volcano and the mnain guys go in
they find da nazzies and run and fight but are caught and told to give tjhe spearhead
then bikini chicks fire arrows at te nazoies and fake proff gets away
the good guys are caughtb and taken to this primitive village and told they can have the spear if they can get it
but 1st there much be a match aainst te champion and if chick don't win, she bites it
she has to have a sword fight on a log over a pit in a fire circle with gaters in it
chick knox oer the champoin with a torch and the amazons spear her as the gaters eat her
looks like feminists are hardly ever pro life lol
so the couple goes into the cave and bf throws a snake away and she gets the shaft
but then fake propf comes in somehow and wants to genetically engeneer the world so the less evolved won't be there
he fights bf and ofers him a chanceto join him afyter saying they shouldnt exist
chick puts the spear together, throws it to him and he shanks fake prof
then for no reason., the area crumbles and the heroes are stuck in the think by rox
the cave midgets dig a way to themand they get out to inspiring music
then she lifs up the spear and it just ends w/o mentioning the future or w/e being saved
then credits to adventure 80s music
the end
I lilked this
its 80s direct to video cheese, but has good music and action
robert patrick delivers and its got a plot that keeps twisting
wtf is this movie?!
w/e it is, i enjoyed it
its got good stuff and is in proper fullscreen without black bars eating half the screnn
for future hunters 2 i want the nazies to regroup and try their world nuking plan and its up to the chick and the bf to stop it. tHEY USE THE SPEAR TO USE POWERS LIKE HOLY ARMOR OR invisbility or energy blasts or super jump and take on te bases with nazies to stop em. aLSO its a 16 bit action game like metroid on sega genesis, snes, tg16, atari jaguar and gba where you go around and use different powers of the spear to get through these bases.
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