The Whale Review

Note; i spell like the learning channnel

The Whale

This is my review on The Whale from the distnat futurre year, to r fk before THEY ended hium, of 2022(the year of Robotech ii The sentinels)

Its direvtred by darren aronofsky who did Pi\Noah\Black Swan

It won the oscar for best make up and best actor

it stars Brendan Fraser from Encino Man\Airheads\George of the Jungle\Gods and Monsters\Blast from the Past\Looney Tunes: Back in Action\The Simpsons\King of the Hill, openly vegan Sadie Sink from Blue Bloods, Ty Simpkins from the 1005 War of the Worlds\Insidious\Jurassic World\Law & Order: Criminal Intent, Hong Chau from $#*! My Dad Says, Samantha Morton from Minority Report\Max & Ruby, and a few guys not on candy a55 back door ghirly man soy boy beta male hioppy vegan stoner peta wikipedia

so after a buncha logos we get a fullscreen thing of a bus driving in an empty place, then a web cam chat with the centre guy not working and teaching a class

then title

then we see this huge mound of a man struggling to function and spazzing out as he read assignments

a guy comes in and reads the paper about a guy in bed with a guy and not likinmg the whaling parts

coming in guy asks for a phone as his is dead and needs to call an ambulance but fatty sez no hospitals

then coming guy is a missionary and wants to share the good word with fatty but he dont care only wants his phone he dropped and had him read the paper as he thought he was dying and wanted to hear it

asian comes in and sez he shouldv;e called a dr ut fatty has no insurance and she sez better poor than dead

also he teaches ann online course

nurse examinies him and bbileguy is still there and he gets up to use a walker to get to the toilet, whih i thought he'd sh-t where he lays

asian hates her adopted dad weho works for the bible group the bible guy is in and is a deniar and bitter and sour over warnings of the end times

also she sez fatty's butt buddy bit it cuz of the church and fatty might not last

nurse sez to send fatty to the hospital or die cuzx his heart is f'd and asian b0-ches out at bibleguy wanting to offer fatty salvation

fatty keeps saying sorry and this triggers asian ho sez she' knife him and he sez "go ahead, my orgens are 2 feet in"

he dont anna go as he'd never pay bak the bills, but we got go fund me and she sez she cares for him

so fatty eats a bucket of kfl and after nurse goes, he reads the paper on moby dick, then takes of his shhirt and shows his huge gut like the leasrniung channel

he goes to bed and the fatsuit encino man wore is really good. this earned the oscar

later he has a drawer of cr-ppy junk food like nedrey from jurassic park and looks of issues of fattness and heart things and eats more t-rds or chocolate bars

he sees the door open and calles on the phone  then howses off in ther shower as hes still able to fit in and they dont gotta hose him off in the back yard and hose out his a55

theres a knock at the door and when he opens it, these big buff black guys with blu hair bust in and startt b0ning his belly fat as he screams and defacates

jk really its his daughter who asks if she';d be fat and he sez he weas fat as a kid

daughter was suspended for posting something THEY didnt like and theres issues with graduating and she's smart and too good for school

he asks to spend time with her but she sez hes disgusting for ditching the fam when she was 8 to b0ne a student

he offers to pay her and help her withgher classes and he reveals hes an online teacher and keeps the camersa off

she wants to have him rerwrite her assignments but he sez he'd help her and give her 100 000 in the bank

shes really b--chy and wants him to walk to her w/.o a walker, which is kinda awful cuz hes crippled from his tonnage

he treied but falls back and sher leaves cuz shes a b --ch

hope he sits on her ansd she splatters into a mess of guts

later he has fod delivered and has a 20 in the mailbopx and has the guy go w/o seeing him

he ordered 3 pizzas? thats like that disgusting italiano junkie who threw his waste and threatened to falsely accuse others of abuse

they otta gets a buncha homiues to b0ne his blubber!

later nurse comes in and does a medical thing for him and finds his daughter came over and she dont liek it

his woman who he betrayed for b0ning a dude kept the daughter from him cuz hes a jerry springer guest

didnty this happen in brokeback mpountain?

fatty looks at his kids online and finds sdhes forgotten what a good person she was

probably cuz you wrecked the fam and she didnt have a dad growing up

so fatty has a footlong and not a b0nar and chokes on it so asian nurse gets behind him and does wrestling moves to hammer it outta himn from behind

she gets p-ssed at him for nearly dying cuz shes kinda b--chy and he sez sorry for nearly dying

so fatty gives a clas saying he did all he could and hopes they can do theirn own thing as they each have their own view

So later he reaches for a key and it falls and he uses a grabbing thing on a stick to try to pick it up cuz he's a mound of tubbage

Later he talks wioth daughter for a walt whitman assignment she wrote on analyzing a poem but she juist listed facts and dont care

he suggesting she read it and she b--ches out over how she did but didnt care for him being a 19th century f=ggit

fatty sez thats a good poijnt to write on and when he asks about mom she gets bummed and almost leaves

he sez if she wants to go she can and she gets less b--hy and they talk of her mom and how she drinks and is cr-ppy

she asks why he tubbed out and h sez his close one bit it and she sez it was his butt buddy who was a student and he se he was a night school guy

also fatty had butt buddy over for dinnerr when mom was out and fatty dont wanna say how butt buddy died

imagine if fatty b0ned him dead?

fatty sez he'd write the cr-p for her if she writes cr-p for him

holy cr-p we're 40 mins in w/o adds

that felt like nothing

so fatty lumbers to the toilet and turns on the sink to hide his crying and she asks if hes ok

the bible guy coems by and daughter greets him and is surpirzed that ftty had a kid

i guess he got turned

duiaghter gets b--chy about faith and how she dont like it and thinks bible guys group isa cult and takes his photo with a camera and of dad too and goes

bbile guy tells fatty of the end times and how the end is coming and the evil will be removed and the good will be here

fatty reveals he knows all this and read the Bbile but thinks its depressing as God made us, kicked us out of Paradise, we killed each other for yeasrsm then the end comes and the good ascend and the rest burn

bbile guy sez The Lord can give him a better body and fatty dont care

bible guy sez he wants to help and thinks fatty wants to b0ne him or do whatever he can with that tonnage but fatty sez he's not into him

bibl;e guy helps fatty with his fallen key and nurse comes in and b---ches out over him being there and brings in a heavy duty wheelchair for blobs

but to quote x men; nothing can stoip da blobb!

fatty likes the chair and outside, bible guy and asian nurse talk as she smokes a faeg

he reveals he moved here from iowa to idaho to spread the word and she tries to make him stop tyryign to save fatty

he sez fatty needs help before he bites it and she zes her big bro did work in south america

she was the bad kid who stopped going to church and bro sent her a letter saying he didnt wanna be marrtied to a girl dad chose

what is this? india

bro fell in love with someone else and dad disowned him and later brother fell apart and was found on a beach derad

also he was fattys butt buddy and never "got over" his belief in The Lord and his dad didn't approvbe of him comitting sins like a hebreww not liking his kid dating a pig

after watchinng maury, which he otta o on, he tries to go to bef but is too fat and the wheel; chair wont go in

later another pizzas are ordered and pizza guy tries connecting to him as his name is dan like the bible guy and tribe

the news sezhow ted cruz isnt doign well against Trump and reads his duahgters notebook

she sdez the place smells, the notebook is ret-rded and she hates eveytone

which he realizes is a Haiku and laughs and his heart f's so he reads th moby dick tning

also the young bible guy trying to save the hugfe guy is like Free Willy

daughter returns and is b--chy at dads asking her about cr-p

she hates eveyone and when he tries to connect and have her hate him insdtead of the world, she b--ches out about him ditching her for his butt buddy and trying to come bak years later

also she thinks people are a55holes and how he should have set more money but he sez he did

also he could have called her or something and he asks who would havet him in their life

sher goes to make him a turkey sandwich w/o mayo and he sez shes a good daughter and is nice to the nasty b--ch

she cuts into the table with a knife and has a smoke, or faeg in gaye olde englande and fatty blck out

bible guy comes in and daughter sez she put her moms drugs in fattys food and smokes chronic and bible guy sez he used to be a pit head

when he wants to leave, she threatens to end fatty with crushed up pills

she alsdo treisd to falsely accuse him of rapeif he dont smoke chronic and he does even though when Joseph was accused he resisted temptation

he has a puff on the poison and she takes a photo and she sez she wasn'ty really gonna do all those evil things

he has anohter puff on chronic and she takes more pohotoes and f--ks with him more like suggesting they or him and fatty b0ning and when she reveals she knows hes not in the bible group cuz her friend went there ansd knows they stopped something, he getsn spooked

bible guy reveals dad cauhgt him doing chronic and dad sent him away and mission leader was only into handing out pamphlets and not doing much else

he goes on how he wanted to be happy like his fam and stole from the mission, also one day he went against the group rules and talked to people his way

but whn hetold em, they spazzed out and after a fight, he skipped town and took the petty cash of over 2000$

he's almost outta money and h=wanted to help 1 person and thinks his rents might disown him

so nurse comes in and i think the wife came too and he wakes up and nurse b---ches out about her giving him pills

its revealed fatty is outta money but really he's not and nurse b--ches out at him saving money for his daughter

daughter b--ches out and tells fatty to f--king die and he gives her the essay and sez its good as she leaves

wifer sez daughter is 17 and gonna spend it on face tattoos and cr-p and fatty thinks shes smarter than that

she b--ches about him being positive and they go on about how he diteched em for a man and how he wanted to see her

wife reveals she kepty daughtert from fatty cu she was worried daughter would harm fatty and is evil

also its revealed daughter posted photoes of him mocking his tubbage and saying "theyr're be grease fires in h-ll when he bites it"

he thinks shes a good writer and mom yells that daughter slashd teachers tires and other violence

also he only mmarried her to have a kid

but to have a kid you gotta get hard and jam it in the womb, and girls dont get queers hard

wifr sez sorry about fatty's butt buddy going to h-ll but when she saw him, wanted to tell him off, but helped him isntead

they talk about them being togetehr agains as a fam and he recalls the last time he went swimming and cut his legs on rocks and bled on the car

after more bickeing he hasn't given up on his b--chy daughter but hhe wants to make sure she has something

also its always dark and raining like in se7en

and not just from the fat guyn and the queers

fatty sees his plate outside broken and the pizza guy comes and when fatty goes out, the pizza guy sees him

he cant take it and stuff his fat a55 face with pizza and sends an email to write somethign honets

then goers to the frifdge and puts mayo on a pizza and stuffs toi dark msuic

i think he's tryign to eat himself dead

again, like se7en

so after a barfing the bible guy coems in and comes out about his truth and how daughter sent the photos of him doing chronic to his church and rents and they wanna invite him back

they say its just money and they weant him back and its full on prodigal son as thats what Jesus taught, the onyl sin u aint forgiven of is the one you dont confess

he reads the bible with fatty and its butt biuddys bilbe and he thinks h bit it cuz he didnt escape the flesh and live in the spirtit and bible guy can saver him from rebellion

fatty tells his story of his butt buddy meeting him after class and  turning queer and b0ning naked  its creepin out bible guy like with brendan fraiser in gods and monsters

fatty b--ches out about how he hopes thers no afterlife as he dont want his butt buddy to see how he devolved and after pushing bible guy too far, he sez "yes, ur disusting!"

so bible guy goes and late fatty sez to his class that he got canned for his malcontent email and thanks them for being honmest with him so he shows them his webcam as the blob and his engorged body

the kids all begin vomiting as oner starts j-rkin off

jk really he sez the assignments and college dont matter and the honest things he wrote matter

then he busts his laptop and is then seen soaked in sweat an nurse comers in and he sez sorry for the 80th tikme cuz hes from soviet canada

asian tells fatty how her butt buddy brother bit it from starving himself or maybe giv and she had to identify the body and fatty sez he wasn't family, only a butt buddy

fatty and nurse agree they aint going hospital and she sez butt buddy would have jumped off the bridge years sooner if not for fatty

fatty sez he treid to save butt buddy but butt buddy didnt think he needed God or anyon

daughter comes in and finds fatty is biting it and wants someone to save him and nurse thinks no one can save anyone

fatty thinks daughter outed bible guy to save him and daughter sez he gave her an essay that failed her

its revealed the essay he turned in was the moby dick essay she did in grade school that mom sent him years ago and he sez sorry for f--kin her up with his acts and how shes really good

he sez shes the best thing he ever did(not his butt buddys a55?) and how he cares for people and she wants him to get to the hoispital but he only wants her to read the whale thing

she opens the door and its sunny for once and she reads the essay as fatty struggles to walk

the essay sez she feels bad for the whale as it didnt know what it did wrong and ahab wanted  to end it thinking it would improve his life and she felt it was like her life

then fatty stands up and as sher finishes her essay he floats up and the screen goes white

the end

that was quite good

when brendan fraiser won th oscar and got his career back after that hollywood creepter mo lested him, i was moved almost to tears to see him getting it back

the acting was good and the ending of him rising up after being freed from his evil was outta Free Willy with the whale jumping

the daughter is pretty evil and the twist that the mom was the good guy trying to protect him from her was good

the butt buddy never being shown was like suddenly last summer how the queero there was never seen onscreen and as dead at the start but was the driving force of it

I liked it being in proper fullscreen insatead of gay a55 widescreen and it showed a broken man whgo made bad choices trying to attone for his damage to those he harmed

glad the Bible guy was welcomed back and it showed that even when losers gave up on The Loprd, He still helps those in need

The real winner was the bible guy who found his way home

I assume the ending of him rising into the Light was a thing on the coming Rapture and how the good will esacape the end times

Also, calling a movie about a fatty "The Whale" is like that Degrassi ep withj the aids bag called Bad Blood

after all the learning channel i saw, this kinda fit

glad i saw this and glad brendon made it back

darren seems to like movbies of losers who f'd out reconnecting with family like The Wtrestler

interesting how in gods and monsters, brendopn fraiser was a guy grossed out by this queer who went on about his lusts after his life fgell apart, and now he's the broken queer who disgusts the younger guy

kinda went full circle

but this was well donbe and i think was based on a play i never saw

For The Whale 2 I want it to reveal that the Rapture had happened and in fatty's heart, he repented for all his sins and was saved, that was the light, but his daughter was revealed to have not been as she treid to ruin the bible guy by sending his fam photoes of him doung drugs and has to stay behind on earth, also with all the good people gone, the planet has devolved into a violence jack hokuto no ken berserk h-llscap of violence and cannibalism and she is fighting to survive to last the 3.5 years of the evil, also its a 128 bit action game like Zelda on Dreamcast, Gamecube, Xbox and ps2 where you gotta get around areas and do missions for your band of warriors as cannibals eat people alive and operate on them with power tools to make em into butt slaves with MANY openings!

Babylon Review

Note: I spell bad but with better morals that hollywang

Babylon

This is my review on Babylon from the sistant Future year (to clark gable) of 2022 (The year of Robotech II The Sentinels)

Its directal by Damien Chazelle who did Whiplash\La La Land but I missed those but heard they was goode

It stars back door brad pitt from No Way Out\Thelma & Louise\Interview with the Vampire\Legends of the Fall\Seven\12 Monkeys\Seven Years in Tibet\Ocean's Eleven\Troy\Mr. & Mrs. Smith\The Curious Case of Benjamin Button\Kick-A5512 Years a Slave\Growing Pains\Friends\King of the Hill\soviet Saturday Night Live, Margot Robbie fromThe Legend of Tarzan, Jean Smart from Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey\1995 The Brady Bunch Movie\Snow Day\Disney's The Kid\The Facts of Life\Batman: The Animated Series\Frasier\Static Shock\2002–07 Kim Possible\Hey Arnold!\American Dad!\$#*! My Dad Says\Hot in Cleveland, Li Jun Li from Blue Bloods\Law & Order: Criminal Intent, P. J. Byrne from Bruce Almighty\Evan Almighty\Be Kind Rewind\Final Destination 5\Crossing Jordan\The West Wing\The New Adventures of Old Christine\Boston Legal\Desperate Housewives\Hannah Montana\It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia\The Legend of Korra\Justice League Action, Lukas Haas from Solarbabies\Mars Attacks!\Zoolander\Material Girls\The Revenant\First Man\As Told by Ginger\The Zeta Project\the 00s The Twilight Zone\Justice League\War of the Worldsm Olivia Hamilton from 12st man and la la land and dinosaur train, Max Minghella from The Ides of March, Rory Scovel from The Eric Andre Show\Modern Family\Harley Quinn, Katherine Waterston from Being Flynn, openly vegan Tobey Maguire from The Wizard\Pleasantville\Spider-Man\Spider-Man 2\Spider-Man 3\The Great Gatsby\The Boss Baby\Blossom\Eerie, Indiana, Flea  from guns and roses or w/e and The Outsiders\Back to the Future Part II\Back to the Future Part III\The Big Lebowski\Toy Story 4\The Simpsons\Duckman\The Lionhearts\MADtv, Jeff Garlin from RoboCop 3\Austin Powers 2\Daddy Day Care\Fat Albert\Toy Story 3\ParaNorman\Toy Story 4\Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker\Baywatch\Mad About You\King of the Hill\Crank Yankers\Law & Order: Criminal Intent\The Goldbergs\Family Guy, Eric Roberts from The Cable Guy\DOA: Dead or Alive\The Expendables\\Touched by an Angel\Law & Order: Special Victims Unit\Justice League\Justice League Unlimited\Danny Phantom\Law & Order: Criminal Intent\Sharktopus\candya55 Glee and The Human Centipede 003, Ethan Suplee from American History X\Road Trip\Vulgar(where a clown is raeped)\Remember the Titans\Blow\Cold Mountain\The Butterfly Effect\Clerks II\Boy Meets World, Samara Weaving from Monster Trucks, openly femionist commie Olivia Wilde from Robot Chicken\American Dad!,  the Spike JonZe FROM THE Jacka55 The MoviES, soviet Chloe Fineman from backdoor Saturday Night Live, Jennifer Grant from Beverly Hills, 90210\Super Dave's Vegas Spectacular\Walker, Texas Ranger, Patrick Fugit (i assume its spelled with an A instead of a U in the REAL version) from White Oleander\Saved!\First Man\Touched by an Angel\MADtv, oh f--k he was in The Last of Us Part II1 that was gay!! Pat Skipper from Demolition Man\Independence Day\That '70s Show\See Arnold Run\rob zombvies Halloween 1, Sarah Ramos fro, Law & Order\Family Guy\Robot Chicken\Drunk History, John Mariano from Toxic Crusaders\the 80s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles\Batman: The Animated Series\Animaniacs\Pinky and the Brain\Hey Arnold!\The Real Adventures of Jonny Quest(that one was good0\The Tick\Extreme Ghostbusters\Men in B|ack: The Series\The Sylvester & Tweety Mysteries\Superman: The Animated Series\Batman Beyond\The Angry Beavers\gay a55 As Told by Ginger\Ninja Scroll: The Series\Father of the Pride\The Batman\Transformers: Animated\Batman: The Brave and the Bold\Scooby-Doo and Guess Who?\Matlock\Who's the Boss?\Married... with Children\Unsolved Mysteries\JAG\The Sopranos\The West Wing\Walker, Texas Ranger\Judging Amy\Desperate Housewives\Young Sheldon\Bob Hearts Abishola\Animaniacs: Wakko's Wish\Batman: Mystery of the Batwoman\Baldur's Gate\Baldur's Gate II: Shadows of Amn\Fallout: Brotherhood of Steel\EverQuest II\World of Warcraft\Call of Duty 2\Desperate Housewives: The Game\Final Fantasy XIII\Sly Cooper: Thieves in Time\Star Wars: The Old Republic - Shadow of Revan\Fallout 4, Joe Dallesandro from Matlock, Marc Platt (like the guy from 12 years a slave?)from producing movies including the cr-ppy a55 devolved live action disney ones, and a muncha guys i never saw in sh-t or aint on beta male gender offender, candya55 SOY BOY FROOTY BOOTY WIKIPEDIA!

I never saw this bt heard it f;d out

in bel air in the disatant future year of 1926this lardload getsa horse to a guy but the guy wanted an elewphant and the guy buying it has elephantsbehind him and larda55 dudnt notice

he brings the elephant in a trailer on his cr-pmobile but the cable snaps anbd it rolls down hill

why not walk the elephanyt

so it poops all over ther guys pushing thetrick from behind and its a load of hot sloppy cr-p

later 1 guy tells him you need a permit for an elephat and he tells e,m hes doing it for garnbo asnd other stars

then its a deviant pasarty with a cjick p-ssing on a greoss fat slob and he likes it and peeople partying in a wild and craxzyy way

the elephant mexiucany guytalks with a chick called elenor and is told not to and pretend he dont know englishj

he goes out to ssmoke and this blondecrashjres her car into a statue as shes a woman driver and secutrity sez to go but she gets b--chyu until ses told they're wanting her in thgere

mexico tsalks with her but she sez shes a star and inside these black guys wine about cr-p like playing bad and swearing a lot like rappoers or italianboes

i think 1 chick ODed and theres a room of a lot of drugs

in a car outside this redhead is b--cxhing at her husband identyifying as italiano and ditches him and drtives off

i think its back door bradly

he goes in andis a big shot but is kind of a big sh-t  and  wwants a  lot of loiquor which is deadly and makes you b0ne thgings you shouldn't

1 guy is gonna eat his gun but brad gets him to go in and do blow, wait i think its mexico doing blow and wants to do movies and be a part of something bigger

then this asian in a top hat and tuxedo and smoke like that chick in Go Nagai's Iyahgaya Nantomo comes in and sings a song of inuendo about pertting something

brad sends his chick to gocheer up A GUY WHO BUMMED BYUT NOT BY B0NING AND SHE DOES A SEXY DANCE WITH MEXICO

F CVAPS LOCK WAS ON

SO THIS CHICK od'D AND THe minions dont wanna ruin the party so they use the elephant to sneak her out with mexicos help as the people spazz out and flee

the minion is asked by mexico if he can do anything and is told no asnd as he leaves the star chick is giddy and cheerful and bimbo-y and mexico loves her

she drives off and brad needs help as hes black out drunk but faking and pranks him

brad wants to do something big inthe movies as hes like a studio guy and wants to go even further beyond and this body in a pool turns out not to be dead but just faking it

then title

fun thing

In The Bible it says something about Babylon being cast into the sea like a Millstone, but also another part says "If anyone harms a child, it would be better a Millstone placed around his neck and be cast into the sea"

Perhaps its a sign that what it calls Babylon is those who harm kids? Also: backdoor brad pitt did a movie on hollywood called, What else? Babylon!

so then in thwe slums of la the asian is therte and a guy recognizes her and gets her sutograph

then we get brad going to make a film and all this crazy cr-p goig on

this is a well made fiulm with a lot of attention to detail and a lot to take in as the camera moves

so this blonde wants somerone with t-ts nbut the t-ts chick OD'd and they gotta film men instead

brad and mex get there and this producer tells brad this german director is spazzing out as hes german and mental and brad assigns mezico to  deal with a bunch of malcontents

they wanna b0ne him dead or something and brad settles things with grman directal and seez tyhe mexico being chased by the malcontents thinking its good

they film it and see the horde of mongol oids or turks or w/e and a big  d w Griffig]thg battle as the gemano duirects and films from a car driving

its to the music from phantasia with the daemon that ripped off faust

1 chuick watching describes it as anopther chick types it

at lunch brad talks wioth gloria swanson about  getting a new face for a good thing andf she wants to do shakespeare and gets her in for cheap for some cr-p and he can use the extra money for sfx

germano busts his cameras and they need new ones and in a western this chick i think star films a silent film and does a bar driinking scene with lust that wouldn nopt be ina  20s film

brad sez; "then he sez hasta la vista muther f--ker" and "frankly sscarlet, ur a c=nt"

1 part a  guys b0nar is said to be too visible and they gotta tuck it

mexico goes to get a new camera and dont know if its a 2708 or 2709 and an hour later one comes in as they were all rented out

the camera comes in but he needs to get back fast and has formes to ill out

the chick acting has to  do a crying scene and they ran outta lube but she crys on command as shes actually good

later its sunb down and mexico gets the camera and chick is crying the scende well and does it in different ways

brad is drunk and struggles woith the scnee and wait its the actor in the scene whos drunk and films a scene while theres still liught and does it with a kiss as the fireworks go odff

theres a fire at the chicks filming but they cinemassacre through and after all that cr-p the film goes through

i like how when it  shows the mvoier its fullscrenn but the making real life cr-po iuts widescreen, showing how movies are btetter than the things making em

wait it was brad put doing the drunk scene

so the director of the chick is amazed she can cry on command and then theres a partyy where they celebrate

asian is gay for  main chick and main chick is called wild child as holylwood like kids in thr weorst ways

so chick goes to see the premier but they dont know her until others recognize her

we see the film but theres no sound even though in real life tyhere'd be an orchestra

the people love the movie and wait i think it was silent for the audience benifit at home

maion chicks cdad comes in and takes credit for her weins and a chick is said to suicide and brad fdoes well and dates some hungarian chick

at the filming main chick is gettign hate from the lead and main chick starscreams hewr wiay into beign the lead

its pretty fast paced and i actually think the filming is good and holds attention

its colored and widescreen

also main chick uses ice on her nips to malke em hard(or in japanewse, iur b00bs are angfry) and becomes a big star like minmei in robotech and later, brad hears of sound films

at brads place his woman is going mental cuz shes devoleved and shoots him or something and they split up

later in a rain thing, main chgick meets  mexico again and she wanted some time away from gambling and issues and mex works for brad

main chicks dad is her manager and s-cked at it and she wants to b0ne backdoor brad pitt and she invites mex into some place

later she sez everyone said she s-cked and she's bitter about it and wants to prove em wrong and is mkinda malcontent

man we're only like an hour in w/e adds

that didnt feel like mich

so mex came over at 12 w/o papers and she feels for him as both are broken and f'd and then he goes to see the jhhazz singer and the crowd goes wild!1

mex tells brad evertything gonna change and they start making talkies and 1 guy gets his a55 chewed out for wearing non rubber soled shoes

they try filming a talkie scene but cr-p keeps f--kin up and they gotta keep redoing it and eventually devolves into profanity and tirades and screaming

eventually thhey get it and celebratye but the recording guy bit it from the head and being cooked in that oven

at a party main chick meets brad and her dad wants to sell sandwiches like her face as brad sez movies are high art

at a party this guy who had girl issues b4 has his head in the john and the chick he liked turned queer

then the aisan xomes in and dances with main chick and i think wants to turn her

asian nearlyt smooches her but a guy saves her with a push in the pool

1 black guy got a card from irving thalberg who knew communism was evil and worse than the nazies despite being jewish

main chick gets malcontent and comes out in cover alls and hasher dad fight a snake

dad blackwes out and sje p[icks it up like a dumba55 and it bites her nack and she runs around spreading the venom and others get bit and its probably used up its poison as the people spazz out and brad accudentally runs over a dumba55

asian chick slices off the snakes head with her blade, pulls the fangs out and all this goo comes out and she sucks the orange spurm out even though its probably already courcing through her veins

she gets up and hads turned queer and smooches withg aisan

so then brad does a musical scene of a bunch of strars like buster keaton doing "i;m singin in da rain" as Noah's Ark is behind em which shows what side THEY are on!

so mex is offered a job somewhere better and is told the chick is f--kin out as shes into slummy scummy cr-p and gambling

mex hets in charge and wants to reinvent main chick and being in nmore africanized americans as "its what audiences want"

like Coal Blak And De Sebnbun Dwarves? That's pretty much a WW2 Wayans Bros movie

mex is manuel but goers by manny like the 5kank in low rise jeans and a thong in degrassi next gen

so while preparing for something, brad gets a call saying this guy who helped himget on ate his guna nd he tells off the chick who was the one outdone by the main chick b4 that movies mean something and his fam was low money and he had to go vaudeville and worked their way up the nickelodeons andshe's outta touch

then its 1930 and brad has a new mvoie and was trained to be proper and less colorful instead of like the thicc blonde jean harlow who stayed herdself, or clara bow who was not one of THEM and hated for it

main chick cant take the a55holery of these c-ck suckwers and wants to go but mex treis to help her and its like yugi giuving atem his ba to summon the sun god to beat theif king bakura before the time thing

the elites keep wanting her to tell a joke but her master and trainer dont want her to but she has enough tells a joke about a bear wiping his a55 with a rabbit and tells off the c-ckl suckers and eats slobby to show em what a "degenerate f--kin actor from jersey fdeos" and tells em off for b0ning their cousins and kids and thinking they are betteer than her

afdter frenching out, she runs in and barfs on the run then on a guys face and bows and leaves

i know shes french but yeah that sounds right

atta showing of brads movie people mock it and its ripping off singing in the rain with the dialogue

brad seems to take it well and gives an interview or saoething and  sez he wont stoip progress with silents goingg and talkkings devolving the protoculture

spoiler; compare abel gances napoleon to the iron duke and tell me which is better

so they are making a black thing and the main black guy is lightert than the other black guys so the band looks mixed so it wont do well in the south so they have the main black guy chocolate up like trudeau with shoe polish

spoiler; they still do cr-0p like this to release films in bad places like china and other sh-t holes that shiro ishi should have removed

like removing blacks from posters of movies as chine hates them cuz they are f--kin racist and Hirohiro was the ubermench

can't do blackface when your alreay black(shows gif of black guy tapping his head)

so after the playing trumpet, he wipes the black off, which is bettere than beating it off, and main chick is missing

brad confonts this old chick about a thing she wrote and asks whhy the people laughed at his film

she sez he's done and he sez shes a cockroach and she sez in a housefiure the cockroaches survive when people die

thats some hokuto no ken sh-t

raoh, a cornered rat will bite a cat

yes, but jyuuza, a rat has no chance against a lion

so she sez tyhere will be 12000 i meean 100 more of him and her and the  system and town is begger than either of em and in 100 years whern all the people making thse films arew dead, a kid born 50 years leter will find his image on a screen and see him as a friend

later main chick comes to mex asking for 85 000$ and they'd put acid on her crotch and she's outta money

he goes on a mexican tirade and she sez hes her  only friend and this shows the dangers of gmbling

isnt there some OTHER way to pay him?

so brad gets a role in something but its a cr-ppy film and he agrees to do it to helkp his homie

so mex gets money for the chick and goes to see the guy with his queer homie who he has to do a monologue in his next picture(i hope thats not prison lingo)

so they go to see the big boss and its f--kin spider man tobey mcgouire and in the same movier with eric roberts from the human centipede

spider man vs the human centipede!

and hes the chicks dad who fought a snake, and snakes are eaten by footlong centipedes!

its all connected!!

torbey sez this 15 year old prodigy is great at everything but the trick is hes a 50 year midget!

the queer hes with is a drug guy and used money from the m,obie to do it

tobeyy wants a movie wher ewyatt earp who coulnddnt count in reasl life, would be mentallt ret-rded

wait, i think the money is fake and made by a props fguy and tobey whos kinda fruity brign sem to what he calls "the a55hole of los angelas"

but california is americas a55

the a55 of a55es

in it is a h-llish place of dark tuinnels and cage fights and SM

i think this is dante's inferno

they keep going deeper and getting creepier and 1 level has midgets as they go to h-ll

they they walkin on a bunch of people sewed together into 1 abominous body and moaning in pain and lust

jk really its a big meaty guy whgo eats rats alive and will do anythign for money

this looks like something from the twisted mind of Go Nagai

tobey gets him a 20 to make the guy eat another rat with lusty giddy glee and sees the money is fake

tobeys gross goon puklls a guh but mex wastes him with a metal rod and escapes from there

to quote ryo asuka; f--kin A ruin! get the f--k outta here!

they drive off as guys open fire on em and that rweally devolved hard!

brad is into this asian chick and wait hes just talkign with her a dhow asian has turnewd main chick queer and wants to save her from beinng icd or w/e

brad thought hollywood was magical but he's tired of it and sez she was a good one cuz queer characters cant be evil exxcept maybe tobey whos not open about it but just seems frooty

asian goes off to eutope before zee axis gets in and brad gives a guy a big tip and sez the future is yours like the song tomorrow belongs tyo me

back door brad cant take it and goes upstaids to eat his gun and blows himself out offscreen

it should have shown his head bl,ow like in species 2

in the day, mex and main chick try to escape to mexico where they TOTALLY wont be raepewd or iced or eaten and she's screwin around and stanbding up in a moving car and covering his eyes and when they stoip she go4s to party with soime devolved guys

he sez they can go to mexico and be happy and if she dont go they';d ice her

she is ok with it and is french so her kind dont get logic or reason and she thinks shes not good for him

sher eventually flip flops and agrees to marry him and go to mexico and livbe happy and a guy ergts a photo recognizing her wait its A VIDEO

ALSO ANNOUNCING YOUR PLANS IS LIKE WRITING A DEATH NOTE

so mex goes in some place to get somethign and the guys in there get iced an das the guy is gonna ice him, mex sez hes no one and begs for his life and killer sez to get out of l a and dsisapear after mex wets himself like a garbage pail kid

he gets out and main chick is gone and he leaves

then we see the black guy playing msuic and we see a montage of things from later

old chick bites iot at her 70s

chick OD'd but i think it was a wacking

bnrad goes to h-ll and later mex comes back to the studio in 52 and shiows his mexcian wife and kid

he talks with the guard in mexzican talk bout how he does radio selling in new york and dont watch movies much now

a clever hint at  how sovbiet california started being a movier place for getting away from new york to avoid edison or w/e

he walks along and sends his fam to the hjotel and weatches a 30s movie, wait, its singing in the rain

then like in The Crtowd, we see the camera move up but then fociuses on mex

then a montage of films he saw working on probably in his head and remembering the wild evil parties they did

then a montage of film over tyhe years with films being colored in techinicolor and all the years of film even t2 and ben hur and wizard of oz and tron and a few silents and all the years of cinema hitting all at once like in the crow where he gave him30 hours of pain

he cryes and the film enbds with him smiling at this seeing what he missed, like a guy who only played atari seeing sega genesis

the end

that was preetty good

kinda like songiong in the rain but darker and grittier, wiith violence, gore, SM, lesbianism, muscles, poop, swearing, purvoes, freaks, p-ss, lust and h-ll

its the Go Nagai Siingin In The Rain

its like 3 hours but don''t feel it and holds attention with good details and fun that you gotta look for

like all the background things as the camera goes by in a long tracking thing

good touches and references to past films and i just noticed all the White leads bit it but the non Whites diidn't

does this movie hate Whites? HATE RIME!!

and nopt like how the black guy gets it in a horror movie, but EVERYone gets iut in horror movies!

and even if the 11 i mean 1 virgin makes it to the end, shes dead 20 mins in the sequel

itsa well filmed and has good characters and shows THE french as UNBALANCED And devolved and b--chy

its based on real thinghs which makes me thibnk creeper tobey is a real guy in a real place of weird f'd up fetishes in soviet califdiornia

that plasce is kookin for a nukin!

Imagine editing 12 years a  slave with this so it looks like after helping platt, if he went to hollywood and ate his  gun

also I realized that tobey mcCreeper pitching movie iideas was actuyally his creepy fetishges, like ret-rds and midgets

is that a thing on being into kids? sounds pretty californias!

Also, shouldn't it have had clips OF Babylon in D W Griffith's Intolerance?

and the mexican guy going back to regular mexicanism is like jennifer lopez in south park with her working at taco bell or w/e

For Babylon 2 I want it to be about tobey mcguice andhim getting his money's wirth from the chick by making her do more devolved devient things, whiuch is what lead to her OD, also it shjows the h-llish place he did those things and goes deeper with more depraved things like cutting people open and bv0ning their guts or live cannibalism or operations to insert live animals intompeople and whenm they wake up they see the thing in em moving, or surgically combining several people into 1 body and watching them struggle to function, or force feeding chicks til they are too fat wo wealk anbd letting homies b0ne their fat, or sewing a guys butt shut and ovverfeeding him til he ruptures and sprays waste all over the area,  also its a 32/64 bit party game on Sega Saturn, ps1 eD0 and N64 where you play as various deviants and bet on or control thing in fetishy minigames like betting how long it akes for a guy to die hooked to a sodomachine or how many bones can a man live without, then in Babylon 3 its the 50s and the mexican guy comes out and revakls his story and outs the deviancy pit locattion and leads a raid on the place with the cops and finds its still going and tobey is running it for hiuis sick kicks and a big epic battl;e breaks out with cops and freaks and the rest of the film is jjst brutal slaughter non styop for like  40 mins, also its a 32/64  bit beat em up on Sega Saturn, ps1, N64 and 3DO where you play in 2D things like Streets Of Rage and beat through deviants, OR, play as trhe  sickoes and take on the cops and fight for your right to be a sub humabn abomination against moreality and logic.

Mazinger Z Vs Devilman Review

 Note; I spell over crossed

Mazinger Z Vs. Devilman

this is my review on Mazinger Z Vs. Devilman from the distanmt future year to The Right Honorable Nipponjin Shhiro Ishii of 1973(40 years before robotech season 1)

its directed by Tomoharu Katsumata who did Devilman, Mazinger Z, Cutie Honey, Grendizer, Gaiking, Planetary Robot Danguard Ace, Hans Christian Andersen's The Little Mermaid

It stars Ryouichi Tanaka from Devilman\Devil Lady\Cutey Honey\Mazinger Z\DBZ/GT\super\CB Chara Go Nagai World\Mazinger Z vs. The Great General of Darkness‏‎\Saint Seiya\Sakigake!! Otoko Juku\Transformers: The Headmasters\Transformers: Super God Masterforce\Transformers: Victory, Hiroya Ishimaru from Mazinger Z\Ghastly Prince Enma Burning\Castlevania Rondo of Blood\Tekken\Demon Lord Dante\God Mazinger\Jungle Book Shōnen Mowgli\Mazinger Z Infinity\Shutendoji\Spirit Warrion/Kujaku-Oh/Peacock King\Transfprmers G1/Headmasters/The movie/Animated\Shin Mazinger Shougeki! Z Hen, Kousei Tomita from Abashiri Family\Cutie Honey\Devilman\Getter Robo\Mazinger Z\Pokémon Generations\UFO Robo Grendizer\Voltron, Minori Matsushima from Devilman\Kinnikuman\Mazinger Z Infinity‏‎, Haruko Kitahama from Devilman\Cutie Honey\Dororon Enma-kun‏‎\Majokko Tickle\Great Mazinger\Mazinger Z\Mazinkaiser, Hidekatsu Shibata from Devilman\Dororon Enma-kun‏‎\Great Mazinger\Daiku Maryu Gaiking\Mazinger Z\\fatal fury ovas\transformers super god masterforce, Kazuko Sawada from Cutey Honey\Devilman\Dororon Enma-kun, Jouji Yanami from Robo Grendizer\Great Mazinger\Dororon Enma-kun‏‎\Kekko Kamen\Getter Robo G,DBZ\GT/super\Fatal Fury ovas\Inuyasha\Shin Getter Robo vs. Neo Getter Robo\Majokko Tickle\Devilman\Cutey Honey/Mazinger Z\Mazinkaiser\Great Mazinger, Hiroshi Otake froim Akira\barefoot gen 2\Devilman\\Dororon Enma-kun‏‎\Dragonball\Fist Of The North Star 86 movie\LILY C.A.T.\Majokko Tickle\Mazinger Z\Great Mazinger\Speed Racer\Pokémon, samu Tanonaka from Devilman\Digimon\Dororon Enma-kun\DBZ\Kotetsu Jeeg\Mazinger Z\Slayers Premium\Transforners Super God Master Force, Ichiro Nagai from DevilmanBaoh\Pokemon\yaoi as f--k gender offender Rannma 1/2\Dominion Tank Police\Dragon Ball/DBZ/DBGT\Getter Robo Go\Great Mazinger\Ninja Scroll\Wicked City\Vampire Hunter D\Vampire Hunter D Bloodlust, Kouji Yada From Devilman\Dororon Enma-kun\DBGT/DBZ\Fatal Fury anime\Fist of the North Star\Great Mazinger\Shutendoji\Mazinger Z\candy a55 okama b0ning One Piece\Saint Seiya\Cutey Honey and maybe some othere cr-p.

This isn't really canon to either series but they did similar things in CB Chara Go Nagai World where Mazinger Z And Getter Robo I Mean Dev ilmasn crossed over

Go Nagai does a lot of cameoes and full on crossovers in his work and is my fave author who''s the most creatyive guy I ever reaD

He made aNIME COOL And this movie didn't meeet Kazuki Takahashis expoectations so he wabnted to do Yugioh Cs GX, but that f';d out and they used the ideas in Season 2 with them going to Domino City and thag Scoentology thing

The movie starts with a battle between Mazinger Z and Aphrodite A against three of Dr. H=ll’s Mechanical Beasts and the heroes win

but the battle frees the female demon Sirene from below the ground

She flies away before they can do anything about it and busts up the town a bit

However she is seen by Akira Fudo, who transforms into his real form of Devilman to fly after her

Dr. H=ll, who saw the battle, realizes that Sirène is part of a “Demon tribe” that according to a legend ruled the Earth in prehistoric times

Using a flying fortress (not Ghoul, the one seen in the regular Mazinger series, but rather the Navalon, one exclusive to this movie) H=ll and his hench-hermaphrodite Baron Ashura follow Sirène to the Himalaya Mountains, were the rest of the tribe is frozen

H=ll helps to free some of the demons (notably absent is their leader, Zenon) and holds em off with a raygun when thy try to ice him

He makes a demon deal with Zanin to help them defeat their enemy, Devilman, if they will help him defeat Mazinger(Note, in CB Chara Go Nagai World he has a thing for Sirene. Not this one for some reason. Probably cuz shes not as nude)

But they don't know that Devilman has spied on their conversation (whut a tweest!)

Later, Akira goes to warn Koji about this but ends up mocking the Mazinger for being unable to fly

this leads to the two hot-tempered teenagers racing each other on motorcycles in a weird unreal battle that they'd only do in the 70s(it ends in a draw.)

It turns out that Mazinger’s headquarters, the Photon Research Laboratory, is already working on da Jet Scrander, a giant winged jetpack (cuz a metal titan like Mazinger Z can fly with wings and a jet on its back)

However one of the demons has spied on them and reports this development to Dr. H=ll

He sends the shapeless demon Bugo and Sirène to destroy the Scrander

They manage to damage it before being driven off by Koji’s raygun(just like earthworm jim)

Sirène escapes by taking Koji’s brother Shiro Kabuto and his friend Sayaka Yumi hostage(if she can damage the scrander then how come she cant just tear up Mazinger z? aint they made of similar stuff??)

She then lets them fall from the sky, but they are saved by Devilman

When Koji goes to pick them up, he watches Akira change into Devilman and so learns his secret

Devilman follows the amorphous demon to the sea, but falls into a trap

he’s rescued by Koji in the Mazinger

During the fight Koji uses breast fire underwater to overheat this k9 mechanical beast that Devilman couldn't beat and frees Devilman from an electric net with Rocket Punch

The k9 gets crushed by a big yellow and black striped thing

Afterwards they talk, and Akira reveals to him that he’s a rogue member of the Demon Tribe who fights to protect humanity

The combined forces of Dr. H=ll and the demons attack the Laboratory

Devilman flies to help defend it, but is overwhelmed and captured

He’s taken to some (obviously magical) clouds, where he’s placed on an ice cross and tortured by the demons for being a traitor (what is this? riki-oh?!)

However, as soon as the Scrander is repaired, Koji uses it to fly the Mazinger into the clouds, killing the demons, freeing Devilman and finally destroying the flying fortress

although H=ll and Ashura escape alive. Sirene gets her left head wing cut off by the scrander and falls and gets impaled on a white tree

ahh she'll be ok

After all, Akira survived worse in Devilman:Demon Bird Sirene

Zanin gets cut in 2 with the scrander after tanking a rocket punch and reflecting a koshiryoku beam with his eye nipples

The movie ends with Koji and Akira on good terms, with the two flying off together into the sunset

Shiro wants Devilman to come back but Sayaka sez Devilman is always in their hearts as a hero of justice and courage

Btw, where was Miki Makimura??

Pochi and Alphonse get cameos but she gets zilch?!

The End

That was pretty fun

nice 70s animation thats colored but widescreen

good acting as Japan cares about their performance

kinda like Vic Mignogna

good fights and story

its a simple crossover team up and luke Mazinger Z Vs Transformers or Maoh Dante Vs Getter Robo G, its  kinda "1 shows guys visit the otrher and fight ands sh-=t"

but its a good adventure and pretty fun

This is trhe Batman Vs Superman of Japan

Unlike many things, its not going for a meaningful message on life and society, its just a fun action cartoon like Transformers G1

I ususally only review 1 movie per series, but thgis is a cropssover, so its like the billy the kid movie, the dracula movie, and the billy the kid vs draculka

For Mazinger Z Vs. Devilman II I want the demons to open the gates of =ll with fdr h-lls help and bring back the dead daemons, but this makews Enma Daioh to send both Enma Kun and Enpi Chan to come in to send em bacvk to h e double soviet korea, And they team up with Koji and Akira and after a feew misunderstandings, like Koji trying to b0ne enpi and Emna Kun trying to fight Akira, they team up, but the high rank dead Yokai king who was sealed in the blacklest pits of Jigoku, rises up and E#nma, Enpi, Mazinger and Akira gotta unite to fight it by combining their Yokaio, Demon and Terch aboilities and by pooling their power, share it and get upgrAdes like Mazxinger Armor as a skimpi bikini o Empi and Akira having Emna's cape and hat, Also its a 128 bit beat em up on Sega reamcast, Ga,eCube, PSA2 sand Xbox but is 16 bit style and you play as Akira, Koji Enma and Enpi and up to 4 player fighting Yokai, Daemonsa and enemies and in boss mode, E,mna and Enpi drive their bases that look like people or w/e, Akira goes Devoilman and Koji goes in Mazinger, and the final boss they get a power up and fight a huge boss that takes up a lopt of screen and gotta breat his flesh off until its a daemon yokai skeleton tat breaks to dust with the last blows.

Moby Dick Review

 note; i spell like  whale d0ngz

Moby Dick

Tjisd is my review on Mopduy Dibk from the disastant fiuture year to joghn hustains dad of 19654 (50 years bneforte Transformers season 3)

its duirected by the excellent john huston whjo did The Maltese Falcon\Key Largo\The Red Badge of Courage\The African Queen\Beat the Devil\The Night of the Iguana\The Bible: In the Beginning...\Wise Blood

its written by Ray Bradbury who did It Came from Outer Space\Fahrenheit 451\The Halloween Tree and a buncha twlight zone eps

It stars Gregory Peck from The Yearling/Duel in the Sun/Captain Horatio Hornblower/David and Bathsheba/The Snows of Kilimanjaro/Roman Holiday/Moby Dick/Cape Fear/How the West Was Won/To Kill a Mockingbird/The Omen/The Boys from Brazil/ the 90s Cape Fear/Ther Big country/yellow sky/The Stalking Moon\MaCKENNAS gOLD, Richard Basehart froom the 50ss Titanic\The Twilight Zone\Little House on the Prairie, Leo Genn from  Rhodes of Africa\Pygmalion\The Snake Pit\Quo Vadis\Plymouth Adventure, James Robertson Justice from Captain Horatio Hornblower\David and Bathsheba\The Guns of Navarone\Dr. Crippen\Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Harry Andrews from Solomon and Sheba\Equus\Watership Down\Superman 1, Bernard Miles from Tom Thumb, Edric Connor from the 60s King of Kings, Mervyn Johns from Storm in a Teacup\Scrooge, Francis de Wolff from Scrooge\Ivanhoe, Philip Stainton from The Quiet Man,  Royal Dano from The Red Badge of Courage\The Rifleman\The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn\the 60sKing of Kings\7 Faces of Dr. Lao\Moon of the Wolf\Cahill U.S. Marshal\Planet of the Apes the show\The Outlaw Josey Wales\Little House on the Prairie\Killer Klowns from Outer Space, Orson Welles from Citizen Kane\Jane Eyre\The Third Man\Othello\Mr. Arkadin\Touch of Evil\the 60s King of Kings\History of the World, Part I\The Transformers: The Movie, John Huston from The Bible: In the Beginning\butt f--kin Myra Breckinridge\Battle for the Planet of the Apes\The Wind and the Lion\Wise Blood, Frazer Hines from X the Unknown\candy a55 soy boy devolvingh Doctor Who, and a buncha guys i never saw in anything or aint on sodom bottom wikipedia

John huston wanted his dad Walter Huston to be ahab but he bit it beforte fiilming and they got peck

Itsd about a 1930s detective named moby whop solves a crime by arthur habb who runs a crime organization

jk really its about whale hunters and is based on a book by "pee wee" herman melville i never  read but heard has gayness

i saw this years ago but dont recall much, but i did see the 1930s ver whjere ahabv gets the whaLE ND IT newgates the meaning of the story

I think my dad read me the classics illustrated comic book of this in the 90s

its based on real whalers who were caught in a whale attack and had to survive in the sea by eating each other

after crediyts and title to olde timeyt images we get isgaem walking along nature and saying he needed money andwent to the sea and rambles on about the sea

he went to new bedford in 1841 and in a bar some devolved guys say he needs perm,ission to sail and hunt the thing

is this a uynion thing where you need to sell your freedom to the collective to get anything and submit to their desires??

so the devolved guys say whjales are f'd and ahhab goes by and everyone fears him

later hes in the dark going to bedand this dude comes in with a cableand has a shrunken head

he hips ouut a bong and starts smoking reefer chronic and making loud whoops

jk realluy hes all tattooed like a yakuza guy or lcommie or feminist and goes to bed only to fibd a guy is in it and nearly chjops him up

hes a cannibal or gaijin or something and the team crew tells em the gasijin was selling heads in town

at churech the priest Orson Welles tells the stry of Jonah and the Whale, whivch 1 account sas thje "belly of the fish" was a term for beiing lost at a part of the sea at a lightlss night or something

after church cannibal queeqwag is helped by ishmawl to read and tells of his family being tribalisms and they becme friends and not butt buddies as they dont b0ne

the next day ish and qwe go out smndf see thinbgs made of wwhale parts andd go to sign up fr a whaleing and hear of ahab getting f'd up by a wjale and such

they are asked if hes a piirate or killer and he sez no so they acxcept him and ish asks of the Biblical King Ahab who was evil

just cuz a guy has the same name as a bad guy dont mean hes bad

otherwise we'd stop naming people joseph after joe stallion or joe mengele or joe bid en

so the ship loads upwith cr-p and live pigs theyare gonna b0ne and 1 guy tells that ahabs mom named him that cuz hes evil and some other hotrroor movie cr-p like him being cursed like muchael myers or The Jersey Devcil

the wanderewr sez not to go as ahabns last mission got f'd and leaves em after warning em

i told my rents not to get da needle and they didn't believe mem then after getting baclk, ad in a wavery voice; ohhhhh i'mn devolved!

after sailing out and a rundown of all theese characters including a black guy who ate a lion he iced and an indian who hunts wale instead of buffalo and a caerpenter who fixes limbs and items

at night ahab walks the deck with his wood leg thumping

later they look ip and see ahab and hes got a whale bone leg  and is stoic and firm like Kenshiro or something

hee grilles em on what to do if they see a whale and tewlls em to search for the White Whale and offers a spanish gold coin to the one who finds it and nails it to the pole

he tells em the WhiteWhsail is moby dick and ate his legs and it f'd his soul; andnow he wants revenge

he gives em a drinbk that if i were writing it, would have parasites in it so he'd give em negators to keep em loyal and if they steppped outtsa line, he'd withhold it and let em suffer

then has em swqear to find it or God would get enm

is this a UNION THING? uniiting against a common percieved foe and going down together?

so the guys talk of moby dick, based on a real white wghale called mocha dick, which is NOT a p0rno but a wgale of the mocha slands that lived over 100 years

they caught it in the 20th century or something

you know, the sea is tyerrifdying, its a bklundless abyss, an infnite void, they lose your mody in it, iut aint commin back, might as well be in space

plus theres all those sea daemons and unidsentiofued sunberged objects in it

we claim to know more of the moon than the seam, and 1 part found this 100 footr long spine of some inknown creatire in it

its not a whale, the sea guys who found it know what thats like

so the crew goes off to hunt a wghale and get it with a hook or harpoon and it pulls the boat instead of going under to get em off

1 guy falls off and the whalers cut the rope like the european union cutting greece loose after it devpolves the united ecxonomy

so da boat gets the whale and shanks it dead and then we see em boiling the whale lard and chunks into oil to power America and the eurotrash

after using the flesghh they chucked the bones in the sea and statbuck goers to se ahab and fills him in on the advanncement

ahab sez thery going to the pacifdica northwest from graviy falls all thiocc and top heavy after a lot of surgery and getting into bimbo tf

ahab has a chart of where the whgales go and loooks for spurm whales

Sailor J: Hay! This whale tastes like your Spurm! Sailor B: Chomp! Ur right1 but lets make sure(j=rked off on the floor and eats it) Yeah! Thats' the same! Sailor J: I have an idea! (J=rs off B and blasts the goo on the whale meat) Now we get both!  The story of why they are called: Spurm Whales!)

so ahab planned out their migration cource and plans to meet him at a place on aporl

starvbuxck sez hes here for wehalinmg and not to hunt this 1 whale nd ahgab sez he'd hit the sun if it insulted him

whales might be smart but animals dont understand words, they understand fists!

also dolphins are the jeffery dahmers of the sea as thewy kill animals for fun, raepe people and practice sodomy

and all these soyt boy candy a55 vegans and soviet lovers act like Japan eating em is "bad" cuz they "are smart"

the nazies were smart1 they had science and tech! they did evil too!

the zodiac killer was smart! he got away with it!

just cuz something is smart dont mean its good!

so later ishmael goers up to search for a whale and sees one and tells the crew

its like 100 whales and they are probably b0ning like soviets on german women in ww2

so they go out and nail the whalke and bring it back to be porocessed like a cow or pig or korean dog

1 guy sez he saw a whitye wail off the cape of good hop[e heading for madagascar a while ago and ahab gets a b0ner and calls off the hunt and recalls the boats and cuts loose the whale they just caught

starbuck tries to talk sense into him but ahab i on a gee haad and goes like megatron when starscream is warning him not to f wityh the thing as it could f up the planet

at least whenhe's not reversaing his ideas and doint care about the planet and willing to nuke it

Starbuck worries that he might be offending The Lord as his mission is to hunt whales to help humans but ahab isnt in it to aid people but for his own black vengeance

he wants to use a legal thing to say ahab went against the original mission and its ok to starscream him and take over

but the people say "the captain cant break ther law cuz he is the law" like judge dread of back door bi den and they submit to ahabs mania

later 1 guy falls in the sea from the top of the boadt and bites it as i thinksome sea daemon got him

also nowadays some malcontents would whilne about a non amputee playing ahab as its "appropriation" or something gay

so no one sees any whales for a while and qwe playes with bones to tell the future, which is against the Bible, and has the carpenter make him a coffin as he saw his end in the bones

like with samuel or saul or w/e whoused a naecromancer to talk to the dead and what came out told him he'd bite it and the next battle he seppukued

ish tells him not to foillow daemon works and be a good Christian and  some guy sez when THEy see the end is near they give up

so later qwe bites it and 1 guy was cutting him up to eat or b0ne or w/e and ish foguht ther guy to porotect his dead friend from being harmed

theres a knife fight but qwee isnt dead and saved him and nearly killed the guy gonna cut him up

i think qwe was in a trance and or astral projecting and sending his soul to wander until a daemon got in and made him eat people

then they see a whale and ahab goes out with em in a dingey

the whale surfaces and its moby detective of the 20s and gets away and as theres no wind, ahab has his men row the boats to drag the hugeb a55 whaling ship along

eventually theres wind and ahab gives a dude who saw the whale 1st thr hole in the art5 spanish coin

ahab offerds a guy his share of the profits and later they come across another ship who harpooned the whale but it gotta way

they got f;'d by the whale and lost the captains son need help but even though the crew sauys to be Good Christians and aid them, ahab ditches em to go on his gee haad and asks The Lord to help captain gardner(like tea gardner in yugioh in that skimpy miniskirt and tight top?) and Gardner asks the Lod to forgive him

ahab goes on a flowery speech about how remastering harpoons to be better and about gibvign them a pbaptism in blood o something and rambles on like an 80 year old irushman who forgot which family member he b0ned in wehat shower

they go into a storm and are 3 days behind him and run the ship full sail as it f--ks apart

starbuck is gonna cut something and ahab is gonna shank him with a harpoon but the st elmos fiure goes of and the area glows green from some kind of protoculture matrix and ahab gets it on his harpoon and pouts it out on his hand

this guy has some kind of powers, like hokuto ryu ken or something

after the storm ahab goes on anouther wordy monologue like tommy wiseau and how he's liek Adam after centuries out of Eden

1 guy is gonna j fk ahab but dont got the g0n-ds to do it wait its starbuck and ahab sez they share a destiny

so eventually the white whale coems out again and ahab goes out and gives another wordy monologue

the whale is done with a fake whale or ginzo jira and looks real and better than the cr-ppy a55 cgi they'd use today

dumba55 ahab stands in a boat in the sea and hunting a whale and the men get their harpoons

we get a good shot of the black guys a55 in briefs and its like in dbgt how we kept seeing pans thicc a55

the whalew vanishes which is odd as its a f--kin kaiju and it rises when they see the birds going around

they nail it with harpoons and it looms liem a t-rd and an b0nar

the whale jumps and tanks a boat its pulling and turns around and mouths the whole boat as everyone bails

ahab gets on the whale and grabs the ropes on harboons in it and keeps shanking it

ahab talsk a lot abotu h-ll like thnder in h-ll and from h-lls heart i stab atr thee

so the whale and the ahab go under and later it coems up with him strapped to the whale and waving his arm while seeemingly dead

what is he? jyuuza in hokuto no ken?!

the whaling boa  goes back for moby and the blowfish and it nails em and wastes em with his tonnage and jaw and tail

then moby dick charges foor the main ship like the invid regent on the sdf-3 and manails it with a kamikaze attack

tru deau ack bar

so the ship goes under and take a lot of guys with it and ish survives by qwes coffin until the ship that they passed by i think comes back and saves him

the end

that was pretty good

its nearly 2 hours but dont feel it

goood action and effects and it goes by at a good pace without needing a lot of chaos and spastic cg

good acting and peck does wqell as the deranged ahab

kinda like mommie dearest with that chick acting nuts for the role of the insane joan crawl up my a55 crawford

the whale parts were well done and the writing was good and its robably the best movie of the book

its colored and i think widecreen and has kind of a earthy limited color and faded instead of bright and vivid like gone with the wind

i liked this one and it has good flow and didfn't drag

Oh and in Arthur, Francine was hungry and needed to read something and her bookshelf had Food of the gods, Breakfast at  tiffanies and Moby Dick: all the titles are related to things you put, IN YOUR MOUTH!!!

Arthur slipping in some deviancy!

For Moby Dick II I want it to be ther whale  bringing ahab to an undersea massive vehicle run by sea daemons who return his leg as it was savbed in stasis and reveal they send the white whale, made by dna engineering, to find someone wioth drive and passion and go around ATTACKING PEOPLE UNTIOL 1 WITH THER CHUTZPA came aftter it, they want to wage a war on their rivals in a city under the north pole and needed someone with sheer ambition and determination to pilot the combat vehicle from tech before noahs flood. ahab sees how  they manipulated him and goes along with it to get ther merch, but when they go to the north pole under city ahab turns on em and uses this humanoid mech like Grendizer or Goldrake to attack the sea daemons and their ship, then goes on a crusade against them for ruining his life andusing the systems in the mech to take out their undersaea cities and bases and after wiping them out, goes to fight moby dick to avenge his crew, only for the whale to unfold into a bio mech humanoid thing and have an epic battle in atlantis as the city is going to surface and destroy the humans on land with its death rays and Ahab has to beat moby before the city gets from the sea to America! Also its a 128 bit game on dreamcast, gamecube, ps2 and xbox like rampage in 3d or king of the monsters or goodzilla destroy all monsters melee where you fight various sea mechs and desytroy their german expressionist cities based on sea shells and mechs based on sea monsters, legandary and real, and they transform into animal and mech formes.

Mackenna's Gold Review

 Note: i may spell bad, but at least i'm not an IRISG!!!!!

Mackenna's Gold

tHIS ISD MY REVIERW ON Mackenna's Gold FROM THE DISTENT FUITURE YEAR TO BUSTER KEATON OF f--k off amnd die caps lock you suybhuman amnimal, 1969 (40 years begore robvotech season 01)

its based on a book by Henry Wilson Allen thAT I NEVER  hewaRD OD

ITS DIRESCTAL BY J. Lee Thompson Who did Cape Fear\Country Dance (1970)Conquest of the Planet of the Apes\Battle for the Planet of the Apes\Death Wish 4: The Crackdown

it stasrs Gregory Peck from The Yearling/Duel in the Sun/Captain Horatio Hornblower/David and Bathsheba/The Snows of Kilimanjaro/Roman Holiday/Moby Dick/Cape Fear/How the West Was Won/To Kill a Mockingbird/The Omen/The Boys from Brazil/ the 90s Cape Fear/Ther Big country/yellow sky/The Stalking Moon, Omar Sharif from Lawrence of Arabia\the 65 Genghis Khan\Doctor Zhivago\Rambo III\and f--king 10,000 BC, Telly Savalas from the 1st Cape Fear\Birdman of Alcatraz\The Greatest Story Ever Told\1965 Genghis Khan\The Dirty Dozen\GoBots: Battle of the Rock Lords\The Twilight Zone, Keenan Wynn from the 40s The Three Musketeers\Royal Wedding\Angels in the Outfield\Touch of Evil\Dr. Strangelove\The Americanization of Emily\Santa Claus Is Comin' to Town\The Last Unicorn\The Twilight Zone\Highway to Heaven, Julie Newmar from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes\Seven Brides for Seven Brothers\Return to the Batcave: The Misadventures of Adam and Burt\Batman: Return of the Caped Crusaders\ da 60z twilight zone and batman and lil abner and star trek/The Beverly Hillbillies\Batman: The Brave and the Bold, Ted Cassidy from 60s The Addams Family\60s Batman\Star Trek\The Beverly Hillbillies\I Dream of Jeannie\Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, Lee J. Cobb from Anna and the King of Siam\On the Waterfront\12 Angry Men\Exodus\the bad version of Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse\How the West Was Won\The Exorcist, Raymond Massey from The Old Dark House\The Scarlet Pimpernel\Santa Fe Trail\Arsenic and Old Lace\David and Bathsheba\East of Eden\How the West Was Won, Burgess Meredith froim Of 30s Mice and Men\Rocky\Magic\Rocky II\Clash of the Titans\Rocky III\Rocky IV\G.I. Joe: The Movie\Rocky V\Grumpy Old Men\Grumpier Old Men\Rocky Balboa\The Twilight Zone\60-s Batman, Anthony Quayle from Pygmalion\Hamlet\Lawrence of Arabia\The Eagle Has Landed, Edward G. Robinson from Tiger Shark\The Amazing Dr. Clitterhouse\Double Indemnity\Scarlet Street\Key Largo\The Violent Men\The Ten Commandments\60s Batman\Soylent Green, Eli Wallach from Baby Doll\the 60s Genghis Khan\The Good, the Bad and the Ugly\The Godfather Part III\60s Batman\Highway to Heaven\Law & Order, Eduardo Ciannelli from Gunga Din\For Whom the Bell Tolls\I Love Lucy, Robert Phillips from The Dirty Dozen, from Shelley Morrison Shark Tale anfd f---kin Foodfight!, Trevor Bardette from Marie Antoinette\Valley of the \Gone with the Wind\The Grapes of Wrath\Santa Fe Trail\The Big Sleep\T-Men\The Texas Rangers\Thunder Over the Plains\Destry, Victor Jory from A Midsummer Night's Dream\Gone with the Wind\The Miracle Worker\The Rockford Files, and some dudes i never saw in anything or aint in soviet back door candy a55 gender offender girly man uso suki, jigoku no okama wikipedia

i never saw this b4 but hear its good

AFDTER credits and tile in colored widfescreen, this guy talks of a guy talking to a turkey vulture and the vilture sez "i was coming here to wait for you" and we see tyhe burd, but not the go nagai manga Ther Bird

then we getta song of this bird flying and camrea angels of flight

turkey vultures can projectile vomit and go pretty far

blaaaaa

therna  legend of a canyon guarded by apache gods and full of gold and if you dont touch the gold you'd be strong

when the spaniards came they looked for the gold canyon and didnt find it

then the americans looked for the canyon of lost addams as addams lookin for it and the apache cooked out his eyes as they did some evil things

they'd torture you for days slow before yo bit it asnd would evecute you with hot coals but 1 coal at a time

also do things to your parts and owned slaves of all available races

so now the place is called mckennas goild or somethi g an d mnioore aerial looks at the mad max wasteland and this wagon looking around and this indian on a horse going by

eventually peck comes in and the indian firsds on him but he survives and he returtns fire

so i guess he hit him in a pressure poiunt and knowcked the guy out and the indian is not dead and peck asks why did atttacked and indian said its cuz peck looked for gold

peck sez he quit gold hunting long ago and finds a map on the indian and sez theres no gold ther

peck offers to help him but the idnain dont want it and chooses to bit it in the mad max h-ll hes in

indian sez the p[spirits will end him if he looks for the addams area and peck sez theres no such thing and he looked

indian bites it and peck leaves him and takes the map on some kind of skin, probably human and leaves the body for the birds to eat the eyes out of

peck burns the map and in some chicks place these mecixans and indians are there and eating their food and will take his woman and give her back if they come by the same way

her husband or father or grandad tries to stop them from b0ning her but they ice him

so the mexicans come by pweck digging a grave for the indian and the mezicans come by and are gonna berry him alive with the dinaen

they shoot the weapon outta his handn and catch him and say they chased the indan for a fortnight and want the map

peck denies knowing of the map and they beat him up and i  the real version probably b0ned him

1 guy knows peck and that hes got a good memory for cards so he'df know the m,ap and they'd use him to find the gold

so the indians with the meixcans wanna bring the dead indian whos a chief with em but the mexicans ironically say "he'd stink bad"

so they go on and peck is on the horses a55 with the dead guy and they gotta cross a cr-ppy a55 bridge and peck's hoprse spazzes out a bit

so they go to a hidepoout peck used and peck is meckenna but i call him mcafrica after the burger and they go to pecks ex hide out and its a hose i mean hole in a rocks a55

in there they eat and peck sez the judge burgerman put a price on his head and mexico by omar sharif which im not sure they/them =mkght think is racist as they/themn think egtyptyians arent white but not surte abotu turks, greeks, italianos, spaniars, portugaloes and slovenians, but they/them made cleopatra black on netflix and she;'s slavic like me

so omeximar is gonna get the judges head and thsi indian chick whos might be catwopman from batman is there and omar thinks peck iced the dead guy and took his map

omar sez the apache are thinking like a White a weant the gold and omar got em to think the spirits they worshiup and probablyu sacrigice to like the aztec ort global warming nuts, say its ok for him to have

omar wants tyo work with peck but 1st you know hes the bad guy and 2nd you know beforte this wars over peck will kill him

omar offers peck the woman and an indian he calls monkey sez no but omar sez with da gold they can buy a=s many women as they want which i assume means h00kers or slaves or both

peck agrees to bring em there and he'd leave as he dont wanna be butt f--ked by the indian spirits anmd he wants his cr-p they took back

peck sez theres no gold or canyon and the indian chick with a face scar puts a knuife by pecks face but ont cut and omr sez he gave her to monkey

later its night but really tinted day and these indians find the spot the guy bit it and ride on

so the badds strick peck in this cave wiuth some blonde who was caught and he comforts her and sez her dad made him marshall but she sez they iced her pop and he sez not to let em know her dad was the judge

they'd b0ne her dead all over

so she sez she recalled peck playting cards and dad didnt like gambling and peck sez he tries to be better now that hes a mardhall

so monkey fights pweck and omar stiops em and the next daythis guy in a bowler hat comes by with a white flag to the badds

they shoot him in the legs and as he cralws away they open fire and shred him with a maelstom of bullets and blood splatters and he screams

jk really the hat guy comes up and omar sees its his homie ben baker like peter parker, susan stormn, reed richards, minerva mink, chelsea charms, maxi mounds, lexi luxxxe, pandora peaks ect

ben sez he got one of omars men to tell him of the gold plan after getting him drunk and as hes mexican ti was either tequla or big butt babes to lure him in

ben wants in and after a talk they team up but hes not trustworthy

as they get up together, omar caps the guy who outed his plan as he was a traiter and unlike megatron, omar wont let him continue after f--kin up

man we're an hour in with adds, thats come by pretty fast, but it feels like not much happens, but it isnt boring

so the whites and the mexicans/reds drink what should be pop but they didnt have it in whenever the h-ll this is and is probably something gay like coffee

2 civilized non bandits who are a bit brittish ae i the group and omar recognizes 1 as a storekeeper from some place

1 guy is a newspaper editor and 1 is a preist weho wants gold for himself to use for the Lord and make a Tabernackle

thwe road to h-ll is ppaved with ood intentions

peck tells preist its dangerous and priest miugth gotta ice guys and the gold is the apache's but priest wants to use it to save them

1 guy is blide and has a kid and its addams who sez there is gold there

like john quuincy addams and samuel addams and john addams and the addams family?

so addams tells of how he got to the gold with an apache guide with horses and the apache made em wear blindfolds and they found the valley or gold

1000 years ago, the indians lived there and this is seeming like indiana jones with them searching the the Arc

but the apache came and iced everyone and popped his eyes and left him to die as they totally aren't eviul

he kept a nugget and it was worth 190$ and they guys dance and sing and spazz out

1 guy sez he dont know if this blonde is a guy or girl and kisses him as i guess he turned queer and the blonde guy beats his frooty booty

in the real version he probably tried to b0ne him like shingo hoibiki in violence jack witht eh tiger and ther jungle and supermodels and nude scenes and shingo j-zzing seeing aila mu taking a nude bath

peck trues sending the paper boy back to get help but they think hes trying to hyuu em outta the gold but peck sez there is none

oma sez peck killed the dad guy named prarie dog like fox in hokuto no ken or spider monkey in the crow 2 and burned the map and the paperboy sez he didnt trust peck as marchall

omar sez they were going to meet peck but stopped o eat and when they went to pay the guy treid to ice em and they had no chocie but to ice him and bting his daughter

the paperboy is confused and dont know what to do and englishman sez to forget the past and wortk together

peck sez they are gold craxy and got gold fever and dont care that the best man in town got iced and theres no gold and ihe';d bring em but most wont return

indian chick gets hammered and they go on and try to evade the calvary by getting the indian chick too drunk to talk and tell em apache were after em and theyed have the indaisn fake attacking whiule the rest go anothe rway and meet up later

in the calvary camp its learly day but film tinted to look like night and the indians attack and ride offand the indian chick laughs while drunk

as the rest go on peck and the chick break off and try to escape but the omar chazes affetr em and reclaimed em

so the team goes on through some neutral turf and getm ambushed by soldiers who shred em with gunfire

while he didnt did it, we see addams  with his f--ked out eyes

so peck is dragged on rope by horse and the dauhgter is whipped by i think monkey

so aftrewr escaping the ambush they wander the desert in the sun like The Hebrews looking for ther promised land

the blonde is f--king out in the heat and omar wants to end her but peck stands in front of her and sez he'd handle it

so peck leads em to a watch hole in the deserts a55 and omar sez he'd give peck monkeys share as i guess hes in h-ll

catewoman indianess swims nude and grit blurred out her a55 and daughter asks whatats his deal weith her

peck sez he arrewsted her bro and he got hanged and asks why shes not married but she sez she never dfound a guy better than her dad

underwatcer, naked catwoman indianess makes out with peck and when they get to the air he shoves her bare a55 off

naken numar tries drowning daughter and they have an underwater catfight but peck saved her

at what the film makes us think is night by tinting it, the neuman tries to shank the daughter but peck saves her and throiws numan in itne water

so they go on in openly day and see tyhe rest of the crew they had being iced by idians

so there was the calvary attacking the idnians or somethign but i missed some watchign a vid on Mel Gibson outing oprah and peck sent daughter to the calvary to bring her home

after she asks the main calvary guy from kojak to help mcafrica, he guns down his 2 soldiers

so hairless military guy like anatole elobnardcomes in with 2 horses and joins with omar and sez daughter told him of the gold

not anatole leonard reavals the daughter's dad was the judge and peck beats the black offa him and omar finds out and is displeased that mcafrica kept xecrets from him

i like how the mexcan guy is the bad guy, they;d notn have that today

i had some bad encounters with spaniards, 1 i knew from the islands of spain blocked me after i suggested not getting a tattoo as theres thing sin the bible against it,

1 i thought was my friend, but i screwed up a proofreading of his p0rn0 dbz comic and he stopped talking to me,

1 mexico friend is loyal but shes part italiano so shes higher evolved

as italiano is the one true race, besides polish, and japanese is good too, and i kinda like the portugaloes

so the gang goes on and the apache took over the yellow river area and its like mad max with horses a55es instead of motorcycle a55es

they race across the burning f--karea and get to a floating square and cut it loose and ride off as the apache come to enslave or torture em dead

also they are in a slow boat to china and the indians got ridfles and bows so they';re sitting ducks and ducking sh-ts

1 horse gets an arrow through the neck and its kinda bada55

then after dodging all enemy fire liek the f--kin autobots they come to prapids and the indias are jst done or someething and not there

they ride horses across the water and the raft busts on the rocks

UPDATE aparently, omar sharif is greek/lebanese, so he s white, i thought he was egyptian, which is also white, as white isnt;' just blonde and blue eyes, like sailor venus, rangiku matsumoto, mizuki tachibana and angel blade's shaia hishizaki

so the pirate crew going through do anythign to be king of the pirates and eat a man thing, gets to a tall rock like an obelisk probably made by daemon worphippers in the past before the white Man came and they goptta wait til sunrise

its tinted day as night and kojack anatole leonard shaves his head and talks with peck of teaming up but peck saw him ice his men or knew of it and dont trust himn like with veegta wakkin nappa in front of goku

peck talks with omar about how if  theres no gold, he still gets his guns back and the girl but omar pulls a knife on him but peck sez "you ice me you get none"

they talk about what omar wants the gold for and he reveals he really wanted it to go off and go to soviet paris to live with  frencuhies who totally aint racisst against non whites in the 1800s

then again,m the frenchies are kinda sissy so he'd be like godzilla or a mad max guy beusiin up the town and they'd be too candya66 to stop him

and even the french women the manliest of frecnhies, coulkdnt stop him cuz women ain as strong as men

beta male; Really?!?!! uggg! what about female athletes?!

alpha male: and by that logic, youi can't say "birds eat spiders" cuz 1 kind of spider sometimes eats birds

beta male: uggg! thats hate! i;m triggered! one eay out!(jumps in fromnt of a bus and splatters as his sissy bones were too brittle from hormone blockers and not driunking milk)

so duiahgter wants to get the gold and her farm LKIFE S-CKED AND she wants to use it and offers the peck er to use it for gambling

theyu make out and the indian catwoman watches and un the real version it was a guy and he's j-rkin off his lonmg uncut b0nar and making loud devolved ape like sounds

so the sub comes up and out of f--kin nowhere the sun blasts colors and lights like f--kin star trek and the obelisk moves its shadow and they say its a quartz deposuit

this is ancient tech, like pre noahs flood with the fallen angel machinery

so the shaodw moves to the wAL AND ITS GHOT A CRACK IN ITSD A55 AND they go through it and to the golden valley that actually exists

to quote akira fudo: what the f--k?! what the h-ll is this?! some sh-t for brains joke?!

so they race banyon onward and catwoman and blonde have a horseback catfight in front of a rear projection and numar falls off and splatters or w/e

so they get to da gold and we see the guysy spazzing out in the gold and a drumbeat and the river is full of gold so you might bite it if you drink

mcafrica senses something and sees the area is cursed or w/e and gets out with the daughter

monkey sez the spirits told him to kill eveyone cuz its apache gold and tomohwaks kojak but omar throws saa dagger in his back when he goes down

cuz when spirits tell you to kill eveyone, thats a sign they are good spirits!

also; the tresure being death is like in the life actrion jungle book movie from 1994 by back door disney and the main guy trying to save the girl from it was used by it too

peck and blonde chick daughter crimb up the wall of the cliff and not bACK THE WAY THEY CAME FOR SOME REASON AND SHE'S F--KING OUT CUZ WOMEN AINT AS STRONG AS MEN

they go up to an area dn omar gets there and attacks with a tomohawkhe didnt use his gun as monkey took his bukllets

chick interpeferes and he thtows her off and shoves peck off the cliff

he stomps pecks hand and duahggrer whips him with her belt and peck gets up and they fight

so the fight goes on and peck beats on omar as omar left his God for another but the apache come ina ndopen fire and peck and blonde chick takes cover

not sure 1800s bullets can go that far

so as the apache ride in this rock falls as if moives by unseen hands and then theres an earethquake but not the guy from samurai shodown and its freakin power rangers where the zords come out

the gold was eaten by the earths a55 and the guys try to climnb down and the apache leave

then a f---kin sasquatch breaks out fo the water i mean wall and its a stop motion thing like ray harryhausen or willis obriwen and is some kinc of apelike creatiure meets a caveman but is 30 feet tall and grabs omar with one hand and bites him h=in half art the ribcage as he screams as peck and the blonde hick look on in horror

jk i made that up, but with all the batsh-t goinmg on, it might aw well happen!

so the f-kin ground cracks iop as the guys race off on horse a55 and this is like 2012 but less cr-ppy a55 cg and they get to the tunnel and out its a55 as it caves in

the walls of the area cave in and we see an image of prarie dogs face on the caves in f--k hole

so omar and the 2 surviuving guys get out and omaer sez to stay aay from him but peck sez im commin after you

omar goes off to come back with a new plan in the next episode and blonde has gold dust in her outfit and its somehow dry now even though and she was sqimming in gold water a few mins ago

peck has nuggets in his bag from kpojack putting it in there

the end

that was pretty good

kinda nuts with the supernatural effect and kinda bada55 with the action and scenes

kinda thought omar would get it but the film was well made

goood effects and music and style and the charcaters were all different enough to tell apart

some didn't last but it had good stuff to it

omar was good as the bad guy and peck did his classic good guy role with bada55

overall i enbjoyred it, its got flow and dont drag and goes by at a good pace

numar did well and had some bada55 moments and it was tough and gritty but only pg wihtough much swearing or gore

yeah theres julie numars butt, but the simpsons and spondebob has butts

its not like we see pecks 13 inch uncut man thing flopping around

swinging it like Guts from Bwerserk swings his Dragon slayer and busting a guy in the face with it!

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeegaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

splap!

for McAfrica i mean Mackenna's Gold 2 i want it to be about Julie Numan's indian character having surviuuved the fall and being crippled and lusting for revenge and when the ground opened up, she fell to the inner world of the hollor earth and the snake people inside rebuild her as a cyborb and use her as a slave, her desire to get revenge on peck and the blonde enboostens her will to overide the implants and she breaks free of their control and goes on a rampage and busts up their inner city below the ground and they attack her with biowarriors and various cryptids that were made by gene slamming but her implants make her too tough and she beats through em and wants revenge on them for making her this mechanical freak with various vio tech build into her and living fungus and flesh grafted into her and granting her abilities and shes a biocyborg of feesh tech and really thicc and busty as thats how the snake people like her. also its a 16 bit metroidvania game on sega genesis, snes, tg16, atari gajuar, and gba where you play as her and go thrtough areas of the underland and fight various abominatuons to wipe em out and win your freedomn.

The Lucky Texan Review

 Note: I spell like Texans like fat women

The Lucky Texan

This is my revirew o The Lucky Texan froiom the distant future year (to lon chaney 1) of 1934 (50 years before Transformers Season 1)

Its directed by Robert N. Bradbury who did Blue Steel

It stars the Elite Alpha Male John Wayne from Bardelys the Magnificent\the 28 Noah's Ark\the 30s The Three Musketeers\Blue Steel\Stagecoach\Angel and the Badman\Red River\Fort Apache\The Quiet Man\\Hondo\The Searchers\The Alamo\The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance\How the West Was Won\McLintock!\The Greatest Story Ever Told\The Green Berets\Chisum\Big Jake\Cahill U.S. Marshal\Star Wars the 77 one, Lloyd Whitlock from Sparrows, George "Gabby" Hayes from Blue Steel\Mr. Deeds Goes to Town, Yakima Canutt from Stagecoach\Gone With the Wind\Ivanhoe\Old Yeller\50s Ben-Hur\Swiss Family Robinson, Eddie Parker from The Ghost Rider from 35 which is NOT the marvel character/Frankenstein Meets the Wolf Man\Rear Window\Tarantula!, Gordon De Main from When Fate Leads Trump which sounds like something you'd head a century later, Earl Dwire from King Kong\Blue Steel\His Girl Friday, and a few guys i never saw in aything

the movie is public domain and according to soviet candy a55 back door wikipedia, WNBC-TV has used a continuous loop of this from the transmitter site during testing or as emergency filler when the feed from the station has been cut off

I never saw this b4 but hay, john wayne

after a mnodern logo we get a coloreds fulllscreen star wuith credits and star wipes to the next guys to seemingly added in later stock musiuc

so this guy comes  by a farm and its jogn watmyeand he kneew the old guy from when he was a kid

hes done college andis here for the rance for cattle but russlers and selling got rid of em,

old guy wanted to do a black smith thing and they have a chicken and then they got the black smityh shop shoeing horses

this looks colorized as in it was b/w beforte but got added colors later

i dont mind and think its got some charm

so geezer gets a letter from betty who might be betty spasghetti and its his grand daughter even though hes only like 50

well, if he had a kid at 15 and so did his kid, she might be 20

he's her last relatiuve and schools ending and she wants to live with him

then the dog comes in and his name is friday like his girl friday andthis movie  is in proper fiullscreen

upon looking at the rock the toook out of the horses foot, the find its a gold chiunk and geezer knows where it is from somehow

so john wayne and geezer go on and pan for gold but not pan ffrom gt getting gold hair by going ss3 or platinum hair by going ss5

some say Pan inherited Gohans Mystic power forme and is stronger than  the other z warriors

which is kinda made canon in the super super hero movie where piccolo jr says she has greater potential than gohan

so they go to ttheexperts and sjhow em and its pure and high quality

they'd get over 800 $ at 16% an ounce but take it in currency and wont give them the location and wanna keep it on the down low but nt the down low with guys b0ning each other and thinking its not gay

the gold guys wanna find the gold mine and the heroes spend a while getting gold and taking the other way outta town while not filing the claim so the town dont know it despite trying and getting lost on the way

later geezer named benson like the minion of t r edwards in robotech ii the sentinels and the b--chy soviet loving chick from lsaw and order svu and he gets his gold solf for 2000$

HE IS GIVVEWN A THING TO SIGN CLAIMING DA GOV NEEDS A RECIPTAND THE GUYS GIVE HIM A PAPER WITH A CARDBORD OVER IT TOCOVER WHAT IT REALLY SEZ

ITS THE DEED TO THE RANCH AND THEY PLAN TO MAKE HIM DISSAPPEAR LIKE WITH holy cr-p was caps lockl on? die you subnn human fiulth! your kind sghould be purged from my blue and pure workd, get f'd in the butt til you die like that guy who was b0ned dead by a horse you monkey!

so benson wants to put money into the black smith sjhop or somethjing and they send money to betty banner and tthis guy who's dad is high up has legal issues and gold guy gets him to get money or he'd cost his dad his job

benson goes to da bank andis gonna pay off his debt on the blacksmith shop

as he leaves he sez they'd work trheclaim next spring and as enson books itsomeone knocked out back guy and other find him and blame benson

benson sez someone came in the back dooor and no one saw him and john wayne goes on his White Non Klan Hore abnd meets Betty Rubblewith really 200s blonde curls and is a bit bimboy

man, john wayne is like over a foot taller than her

so joghn wayne stops by da bank and the sherfrifs malcxontent son has a lot of dough and bucks but not the male and female animals and wayne confronts hum but son fiights him

you cant beat john wayne! its like taking on Optimus Prime!

And when low on energon, optiu,mus beat megatron crippled, but megatron survived a  ship full of energon blowing in spoace with enough force to move cybertron from eartyh

thats some DBGT strong!

so of cource, john weayne kicked his candy a55 and makes him confess and dont need an SM Rope like wonder woman

wabne then rides off south andthe town watchesand wait, ther b--chy son is the guy he'sd chasing

he gets a tree branch and ridesit like a broonm or a55 water sklii and slides down this watyer thing to get ahead of him like that battletoads level with the rat

whenm b--chy son comes in, jhohn slugs his candya55 out cuz hes a Real Man and not some girly man injecting soy into whggats left of his parts!

so waynbe beings him back and dad wont help his evil kjid cuz hes a criminal; and scum, unlike the chief head irish man president

so benson is freed and waybe retunrs the backs money he took off son and john waybe tells hhim betty is home

they come home and bettt freets him and she's cooked dinner like a good woman

after dfinner benson is gonna stake otu 3 claims and file em the next day and waybne sahows her around

so the banker is gonna be ok as he needed srest and there was a hospital planet nearby and gold guy hears frombetty that benson is out and gold guy goes out to do evil

in the claim, benson has something that jowhn wayne and berty doknt know fo and he shows the dog and the music gets ominous as the gold guy and his minion go off on their horses a55es

so the bads catch nbenson comes back and he wont give em the location so they cap him and try to catch his muel

the muel cant be caught and is stubborn like trying to explains to a blue pilled guy that the news only tells you wqhsat IT wants us tyo hear and they move on

benson isnt dead somehow and his dog goes back and bensons horse retunrs w/o him

the dog comers back and leads jogn waybe as he sends the blonde betty bimbo to stay home and be safe as shes not a fighter and is like 4'11 like sailor moon

in the wastelands, the benson finds the box of things he kept and waybe found him and he tells hown eaweyne abouty who nicked his head on thwe way home

they get home w/i being seen somehow and tell betty the bimbo not to tell anyone she saw him

benson gets out his make up and its revealed he was a performer biut not like the gay a55 performa pal yuigoh cards in candy a66 arc v

the gold guysn come by and say theytook posession of the ranch days ago and had the rights to it and john waybne sez they'll talk in the am

benson says he signed 1 paper a while ago and they scammed him like gaijin with their calls and mails askijng for cr-p from their 3rd world cessp[ools with raepe and murder and aids

now the gold guys think benson is dead and cant deny it so the benson sends the jown wayne out to check the claims

the gold guys see bensions canteen on joghn waynes saddle and while john wayne is in they check it out

the sherrif comes byand the gold guys say benson vanished and now jowh wayne named jake like big jake has his canteen of gold nuggetds

so the sherrif has john wayne helf until tey locsate benson and hsi hearing is the next day

betty bimbo blonde stops by and talks with john wayne and comes home to tell benson to be thewre w/o being seen

so they go to the hearing and benson is cross dressing but knows hes not a chick and is doing it as part of a plan and not for lusts

like lancer in robotech how he only put on woimens clothing and hung about in bars as if he didnt disguise himself, he'df be vivisencted

and as he's a wanted man, no one would think he's a female singer

like if madonna was really the zodiac killer, no one expects a wanted man to be out in the open, but hiding in the shadows

so benson goes up to give his statement and tells em he saw the guys who shot benson and were in the court and as he goes up, his drress is caught on a chair and rips off

he reveals hes the real benson and not only his closes living relative and names the guys who tried to ice him

they run out the window and the guards fire on em and all h-ll brekas loose

so the bnaddz go off in horses and benson goes off in a 30s cr-=pmobile and i guess tyhis is the modern era of 1934 and they just happen to live like its the 1800s

jogn waybe goes off on em on his white a55 horse and the badds get on a railway cart thing

is this where back to the future got it?

so benson goes by em on his cr-pmobile and we get fast action like a dsilent film

this is liek a silent film but not as much as blue steele

so john waybne rides by the xcART AND jups on and fights a guy and both fall off

the main gold guy runs into the cr-pmobile aND FIST FIGHTS BENSON AND JOWHN WAYNE FIST FIGHTS the other guy

benson finishd gold guy with a stick to the head and gives him a second blow to end it as joghn wayne beats out the other guy

then we getta photographer takes a weddign picturte peach pof jogn wayne, benson and blonde betty and john waybne makes out with betty and the camera guy walks off with his camera

the end

that was pretty goofd

not too long, only like 50ish mins plus on grit its got an extra 35 mins of adds to get it to 90 mins

good filming, kind of m,ore advanced than blue steele but still has remnants of the silent era

good twists and story and no filler

acting was fine for the mid 30s

good action and charcaters

its not a bad film

its simple but holds up

but I thoguht it was like an 1800s placed film until i saw that car and think "wait, this is modern?!"

its like watchign a longplay of Spiritual Warfare on Sega and seeing a jumbo jet and thinking "wait, i thgouth this was in bible times!"

for The Lucky Texan 2 I want it to be 20 years later and John Wayne is a big time mining ceo and benson is a head in a gjar on cybernetics and its a sci fi futuist 1950s thing, the gold mine he runs has employees going to forme a union and shut it down cuz a rival comnpany don't like him disagreeing with THEM and sent commies to ruin his mines, So his daughter who's blonde and really buff and goes around in a gold bikini and helmet goes to take on the unionites and beat the commie outta em, also John Waybe comes with her and is buff too and they fist fight the commies, also its a 16 bit beat em up on sega gebnesis, snes, tg16, arati jaguar and gba wghere 1 player is John Waybne and the other is his beefy daughter and the final level is the rival company revealed to be owned by the soviets and planning to take down America from within and using surviving members of The boxer rebellion who are kept alive by daemons they fuseed with and John Waybe and his beefy daughter are wearing blerssed gold armor to help e, fight em.