The Knight Of The Snows Review

Note: I spell snowy like Tintins dog

The Knight Of The Snows

This is my review on The Knight Of The Snows rom the ditant fuiure year to te French heeo the marquis de sade of 1012 I mean 1902 I mean 1912, that ne(100 years before the world ended ro the mayans)

Its directed by Georges Melies who did The One-Man Band/Going to Bed Under Difficulties/A Trip to the Moon/The Living Playing Cards/The Black Imp/The Conquest of the Pole/The Inventor Crazybrains and His Wonderful Airship

He was into magic as in performance trickery but a lot o his films had occult themes

But so did Go Nagai an he did great work

We start with a royal thng in a castle i think

checkerboard floor! daemon worship!

So this guy brings a girl, I thin a prncess around an a ace hair guy comes in an acts all french an b--chy

waving his arms lie a italiano an getting his irish up

he pulls a guy out an gets slapped so they get a sword fight for a bit

hairy a55 gets held by guy an his blade taken but breas free an storms off

hair mo goes to this stone building place with a guy buy a huge book mixing fluids an waves around his arms

he sends fluid guy away an spazzes out more but a person or yokai comes out a closet or box an vanishes

he looks around and checks the book but a snae puppet comes own and scares him

he turns back the page and this guy above the boo where the snake came in the shadows is there then vanishes 

a wizard looking guy comes out an hairmo pays him or hands a bag of cr-p to summon this pointy hat face hair guy rom the closet

he takes off the hat as hairy a55 spazzes out more

hat guy gets a contract an hairmo signs it

hat guys turns into a super hero in tights with a bat on his torso, shorts, a head antenna thing an shoulder things like Bebi Vegeta

so devil man hat mo summons small devils from the book so hairmo trys to cover it with his hans

then the rectangle cube thing he was sitting on opens and 2 more devils come out

then devil chicks come out the book an hat mo evil man vanishes the book

the summoned guys go in the closet and come out of a fire on the floor in i thin a throne room where hat mo devil man opens his cape an a bat flag rises up

theres 2 devils with him an he grabs a chick to stomp her through the floor probably to h-ll

they post an the rest get summoned then he brings in a cauldron thing with a wagon behind it

they put a woman in the wagon then add bars on frames to make it a cage and swirl the bed out

then it cuts to the devils in the empty room an fire bursting with smoke

then back to the wagon and thing where a doofy dragon is walking as 2 guys in a puppet suit

aliens alien queen came a long way after thing

but shin Godzilla wit its devolved thing and googly eyes is still cr-ppy

evil man hat mo whips the dragon to get it to pull the thing an sits in the cauldron looking like some buckaroo banzai thing

it falls over so he blasts it with a sparkler sword and it barfs sparkler fireworks an pulls the thing

in the wizards room this guy who fought the hairmo comes in and according to soviet wikipeia, hes a prince like in Spaceballs and the girls the princess an the hairmo is a guy wanting the throne like a baron or w/e an sol his soul to a demon like zuckerberg

he asks wizard for help an offers him a bag of b0ners or w/e

wizard mixes chemicals to make a winged guy and 2 chicks appear

winge guy gives him an item an wizr sez something which scares him an he goes to the room the chic was caught in.

he throws a thing rom the item on the floor an a winge person appears then gives him an item an its a telescope

he looks in it to see the dragon wagon going up a dark sky on a slant and demons hassling the chick

he's bummed but winged chick helps him

in a dungeon like dung plus eon like an eon of dung like dantes inferno, devil man brings hair mo the wagon with the girl in it

the devils use ropes on the cage to lift it up like Princess Peach in sodomario bros, wheels the cart out, an lower her under the floor to an inner area where demons remove the cage and vanish

on a sea in a viking like ship the winged guy has guys row through with i think prince and wizard maybe

the moon is a thin crescent which implies demon worship

hero in a shiel like the shiel hero gets to this castle an theres a white thing in the ar sky, possibly moon, implying its been a while, or sun, but the sky is dark

he opens a hole in the walls a55 an goes in like a tapeworm

in this cave, fire balls jump around then stoop so he gets a log an bats in the cr-ppy door

he crawls through a tight passage like an intestine an it crushes on him so he uses the 1st item to make it lift

he goes in a barre window to the dungeon and litens or her to in shes under the floor

he cant open it so he uses the item to summon winged girl who summons a guy to help open it an use a rope to bring up chick

they reunite and leave and in the throne room the king i think is dealing with hair mo

main prince and chick return and hes the hero

king has hair mo taken away to be drawn an quartered or w/e and wait its the noose

also are a buncha guys in white robes and hoods like The Klan

as they're gonna string him up like many people deserve, devil man comes in from the floor and the Klansmen cower

devil man saves him then brings him to h-ll

the end

that was petty cool

longer than most of his other films but it has a cool story

goo filming and effects

its got that fairy tale style like Sailor Moon

nice backgrounds

the characters spaz out lie italianoes but are pretty cool

it shows the dangers of the dark arts

no title cars but it tells the story well even without em

glad i saw it

also the main guy is also a baron an a knight of snows an the king has a slavic name Majolic

For The Knight Of The Snows 2 I want the barons mom to come for revenge an make a pact with another demon to gain big power and devolve into a hulking sasquatch. So the Knight gets a hole armor to ight her. also its a 16 bit 2D fighting game on sega genesis, snes, tg16, Atari jaguar an gba where you play as the knight or other charcacters who want the princess from different kingdoms an the sasqtatch is the final boss.