Sergeant York Review

note; I never saw this b4. so I'm experiencing it and reviewing it. so theres typoes

sergeant York

this is my review on sergeant York(40s ver)

its by howard hawks who did the thing from another world

and stars cooper

ooh, its based on actual events

and music by max steiner

it starts with heroic music and deticates the film to survivors of ww1

until the 2010s, that was possible

so its 1916

and people are singing about being there for a roll call

oh its church

the priest sez the story of the good Sheppard leaving 99 sheep to save 1

a guy with loud shoes comes in during it

priest sez a farmer near em left 67 pigs to find 1

then cowboys come in and shoot up some trees

the guy found the pig in the winter

he gets fed up with the gunfire and ends mass

later some old guys (civil war survivors?) talk about current events

the paper sez the germans are winning ww1

good

better than the brits and serbs

and a few guys are displeased over the germans getting to paris for some reason

most don't care

then mother York comes by shopping

she talks to the priest about someone named Alvin

I think he a malcontent based on what they say

she asks priest to talk to Alvin

later mom yprk goes home and sends her kid George to get Alvin from the Kentucky boarder

Alvin is in Kentucky from Tennessee to get booze

theres a line on the floor separating the states

why'd they build it there??

after talking with his drinking buddies over what to drink to, they drink against getting sober

the bro George comes in to brings him home

but 1st theres a bar fight over a guy poking fun at his mom wanting Alvin

1 guy gets his head beat into the floor like George Zimmerman

but this time he didn't need a gun to survive

I think it was Alvin beating the head

then they go home

MA YORK hoses him of with a bucket of water

after dinner Alvin plows the field

he talks to the priest about how he plows around a rock and its easy to plow crooked and hard to fix it

also Alvin is going to h-ll but can be saved if he gets right with the Lord

priest gives more good advice about finding his way and having something to anchor him

but Alvin don't think he needs it

imagine if the priest said; see you in h-ll Alvin(from heaven)

later these guys are on a hunt and following hunting dogs

a 10s chick gives Alvin advice but hes got a b0ner

he talks with the chick

brother George doesn't get whats wrong with Alvin and goes off

her name is gracie like in student bodies or degrassi

also hes noticed she "growed up"

how old is she?

how old is he??

later hes grooming in the mirror and talking with ma York about his dad and grampa getting chix

later gracie is knitting and talking to zeb Andrews(possible relation to d b Andrews from Robotech the movie)

zeb wants to take gracie to a dance but Alvin comes in and zeb gets disgruntled

or should I say... malcontent!!

zeb keeps trying to outdo Alvin but Alvin keeps his cool

this is like degrassi in the 1910s

gracie goes in to get cider but when shes back zeb left

I think Alvin said he'd b0ne zebs fam dead

wait, he fought

shes disgruntled over it and he sez he gon marry her

she freaks out

she sez no and he thinks its cuz of the land he owns

she sez all he does is fight but he don't get it and books it

at home the mom sez the dad tried to get the bottom land (I don't know wat dat means) but Alvin don't care

hes like Inuyasha

later he tries to sell cr-p to a 1800s looking dude

the guy gyps him

they make a pact that he pays him 70 $ in 60 days or hw loses it

he agrees to do work for 75 cents a day

his logic; that's 60 days and 60 nights

but we need rest to function

we getta montage o him doing various 1800s work like shoeing muels and splitting rails

if this were an 80s movie it would have a stan bush song

like with blood sport or transformers the movie

also the gracie falls for him

he also has a calendar where he adds up his cash

so later theres one night left and he don't got enough cash for it

he asks the 1800s guy for extra days

he gets it

on Saturday is a turkey shoot to win a thing he can sell

nowadays the animal supremacists would throw a sissy fit

like that Morrissey candy a55 who wouldn't go on with duck dynasty guys cuz he saw em as "murderers"

so Alvin makes turkey sounds to get the turkey out the log and blows it apart

they don't show it

too bad

it otta show it asploding is ultra high def slo mo 100000 frames per second

then theres a gun accuracy contest and Alvin does well

another guy does well and Alvin wins

he sells it

but 1800s guy has sold the land to zeb

he snaps and walks off

he then starts picking off everyone who ever wronged him in a birthday related list

jk

that would be cool though

instead he is disgruntled the guy gave his word and welshed on it to jew him ot so he went to irish up his liver

he goes home in a lightening storm and gets fried

he survives but his gun melted

and I think the horse got f'd

he hears church singing and goes in the church

everyone is happy to see him

he later goes to the 1800s guy and the guy is freaked out

but Alvin is nice and has found the Lord

he asks to buy back the mule he sold him but is given a good price

also he chats with zeb and is nice

he asks to work for zeb

they decide to work together

later he encourages gracie to marry zeb

she freaks out and wiggles a knife around at him saying shes gonna marry Alvin

later hes teaching children the good book

right after he says "thou shall not kill" war is declared

I should note that Woodrow Wilson ran on the promise not to go to war

after he gets in? war

so Alvin don't wanna go to war

he thinks the bible is against it

I should mention the proper translation from Hebrew to English is "thou shalt not murder"

if someone is trying to kill you and you fight back and the attacker bites it its not murder

also the Israelites went to war against many groups in the old testament

they iced the Canaanites as they ritual sacrificed their children to a demon god

and if a fam didn't have a baby to sacrifice, they'd buy one from a poor fam

the priest sez members of certain religions are exempt for military service if its against their faith

but the army guy sez their faith is just the bible and its not specific on saying war is bad

they appeal but it runs out and Alvin don't wanna go

but he goes anyway

he has faith in the Lord for keeping him safe

if this were made nowadays it would be the evil Christians forcing the peaceful non Christians to fight their war and have no respect for their gods

he sez bye and gracie gives him a smooche

1 chick asks what they're fighting for and mom sez they don't know

its for englands deviant regent so he wont lose face against his cousin the Kaiser who he hates over the Kaisers grampa doing something his grampa hated

at the training camp the head guy sez to watch out for Alvin as hes against killing

2 guys have to explain to Alvin how a subway is as they are from soviet new York and Alvin never heard of it

later the men get their firearms and the head guy makes comments against his being a conscientious objector

later they train with live ammo

Alvin does super well

the yankee army guys are surprised by his skill

he gives em tips on hunting turkeys

the higher guys give him a chance to get promoted

he don't wanna take life from others as God gave it to em

the army guy gives bible verses that are pro war

but Alvin gives counter verse

so a higher up gibes him a book on American history

they talk about Daniel boone being free

and how Americans have been fighting freedom

but this war was started by the serbs icing archduke Ferdinand

the germans didn't start it

and the brits did a lot to get hate

and iced rasputin

I missed a bit as my fata55 gf kept spamming me about dbz cr-p

so he reads the book and is conflicted over God and country

he remembers the line of; give to God what is God's and give to Caesar what us Caesars

he goes back to the army and gets to be a corporal

later the soldiers go to france

too bad America sided with the brits

we could've done good with zee Kaiser

so they are at the trenches and being shelled

one guy bites it

now I'm a descendant of ww1 survivors

my great grampas fought for Austria

once my great grampa was in a crater

a shell came in

7 guys dead

hes wounded

so later the ameicans go on a mission to stop the enemy thing

much gun and shell fire

an unlike most tv things, it shows people biting it

not just gunfire and people running

they get the high ground ad capture the germans

but the gertmans counter with a rapid fire weapon and mow some down

they're pinned so Alvin goes out on his own takes out the weapon users

he takes out more guys by using a turkey call to confuse em so they come up

he picks em off one by one until they surrender

he catches a bunch but 1 guy throws a grenade and ices a guy

he gives em a warning

they then take the prisoners to the American area

they meet some English allied solders and move on

he goes to another base and they are gonna make em go on

but after hearing it was like 8 guys who did it, they help em

word spreads about Alvin catching 132 guys

Alvin tells a superior about catching em

1 guy asks what changed alvins mind to fight

he sez he iced em to save lives

that's also legit not murder

if someones gonna murder some innocents and u ice em to protect em, I don't think that's murder

but don't quote me

Alvin is promoted to sergeant and gets medals

he comes home and has a parade

I missed some cuz my fata55 gf was bugging me about some cr-p

I think hes meeting the president

the music is really good

touching and special

really fits the mood

but when he got the medals I felt it sounded like it as gonna end

he gets a call from home

oh wait hes in new York

better known as new Sodom

lol

so people want him

2 film makers

Ziegfeld

and a breakfast guy

and they'd pay out the a55 over it

but he don't want cash for killing people in self defence

I missed a bit as I was typing to my fata55 gf

man that chick gets needy

oh I remember

he wants the land zeb had

I checked wikipedea and it said the Tennessee people bought the land and built him a house

the end

that was good

if they remake it, its gonna be violent, swearing, lusty and anti American

don't remake this holly wood

you'd f it up

for sergeant York 2 I'd like for it to be in the 30s and f dr is f ing up America. he chooses to send his goons to beat up people who go against his new deal communism. he also has their arms and legs removed and keeps them as slaves for his dogs to b0ne as a warning to real americans. they come for Alvin as hes a good biblical American and is against communism but he defends himself by blowing off their arms with pinpoint shots that hit the key area. he takes on f dr's minions and goes to free America from him, but f dr has mechanically enhanced his body with cyber items and you gotta  take him on in several levels of run and gun action. its also a 4 player run and gun on sega genesis and super intend with you take on robot clones of f dr and frees areas under his control where he is removing peoples limbs for defying him in amputation factories and has dogs attacking em(you also ice dogs)