Thursday, March 22, 2018

The Mad Genius Review

note; i'm pretty smart too. I just spell bad
the mad genuious
this is my review on the mad genius (1930s ver)
its based on a play and was made cuz svengalli did so well
it stars jonh berrymore and has small parts by boris Karloff
small parts?
that sounds wrong
its directed by Michael curtiz who did these films in the 20s
Sodom and Gomorrah
The Moon Of Israel
Noah's Ark
Yet none are on the history channel
they'd rather air the mummy; tomb of the dragon emperor
or boogie nights
after quick credits the film starts
15 years ago in Europe this puppet master has a puppet show of puppets dancing
a shoeless boy moves his feet while watching
the puppet master snaps a puppet cuz hes p-ssed at it and we hear a scream
its the boy getting beats from his dad
he runs and the master is amazed how great the boys legs are
for dancing
the dad is boris Karloff
master hides the boy and dad moves on
then they skip town
that's child kidnapping
just cuz the dad beats him don't make him bad
this is like the 1910s
my great grandma beat the black off my grampa
he lived to be 94.5
so master is named ivan and when he was a kid people said he was a genious
he wanted to be a dancer but his leg was cr-ppy
its done in this monologue all done in one take to tell his backstory
he talks about frankensteins monster, the golem and the homunculus
and how he's gonna make this kid be his avatar of his dreams
like those toddlers in tiara fast chicks who make their kids perform
then its the present
which is the 30s
in berlin
theres a dancing theater thing
a guy tells ivan the boy stops dancing at times
ivan tells him the boy was nervous and ivan made him what he is
also theres a chick the guy is into but she's reserved for the boy
ivan goes behind the thing and chats with a white chick in an dark afro about making her a high rank dancer
no not dana from Robotech
shes blonde
he also chats with a blonde dancer
the show director is going mental and needs something from ivan
I think its drugs
he does it in silhouette
later oy chats with ivan and he is gay for the chick
but ivan thinks it'll ruin his work
boy thinks this guy is gonna seduce this girlt he likes
boy; all he has to do is look at her and...
me; she gets pregnant!!
ivan sez if she's pure she'll stay away from the guy who wants to b0ne her
if not, she aint worth him
sounds right
after boy leaves, ivan calls a guy and tells him not to give up
I think its the guy who wants to b0ne her
then the afro chick come in and ivan tells her someones gay for her
later he chats with her again and she sez the boy isn't into her
he tells her to see him jin his office at 2 30
I think he';s gonna b0ne her
later the chick gets flowers
ivan has a letter written
it sez the chick isn't good enough for her role in the show
in other words; dear b--ch, u s-ck!!
he tells the director that the director wrote the note but director knows its not true
so ivan throws drugs in the furnace and sez if he don't do it, he wont ever get any more drugs
as that's the only drugs in the world
and sez if he drops the rest in, the director will be free, but will suffer
btw the director looks kinda like ron Jeremy
so ron Jeremy gives in and consents to ivan
the chick gets da note and dnt understand why
ivan ends their contract by mutual consent
mutual consent?!
whats with al the p0rn0 refs in this?!
ivan suggests she goes with some guy
she sez she loves the boy but ivan sez to ditch him for his own good
and the chick ivan loved lolled in his face
he twists her into signing the contract consent
ivans a d-ck
ruining someone innocent for the gain of someone he wants to get ahead
hes like a liberal bashing a guy he disagrees with so the guy running against him who's worse will win
the boy comes in and is p-ssed
he sez he loves the chick and don't like ivan ruining her
he sez theres only 1 of boy and many dancers like her
ivan tells his cr-ppy life story of how he was a cripple as a kid and his parents f'd him up
now he lives through the boy
and how they are like 1 being
that sounds like they're b0ning
boy sez he never heard that story b4
they lived together 15 years and never talked about his past??
they argue and ivan is like; u r my puppet! I own yo a55!
boy books it after da chick
later boy and chick are living together and have a pet bird
1st I hope they aint b0ning
2nd hope the birds head don't fall off
like that jim carry movie
they listen to a street singer and r happy
meanwhle ivan is smoking and drinking and with a 5kank
just like Charlie sheen and errol flynn
later he talks to a music guy and sez his suit makes him look like a wet string bean
yes, hes drunk
music guy tells his idea for a show
it has a fat chick I think
ivangali sez those who like it is a stoo pid a55
yes, hes drunk
he goes out and the bimbo he was b0ning wants him to stay
man we're like 50 mins in
it feels like nothing happened
sven gali I mean ivan wants to put the boy back in the mud where he found him
later boy tries to get dancing work but cant
but this is flapper dancing, not ballet
its like saying if you can play sega genesis you can do playstation 3
later the chick is creeped out how the boy is sounding like ivan
is this like batman beyond; return of the joker??
oh and boy works at a cabaret
later ivan invites a girl to his office at 3 00 to make her a dancer
I think hes gonna b0ne her
the chick sees ivan and wants him to hire back the boy
he tells her to break up with him
later booy comes home and sees ivan
he accuses him of doing something to her but he sez he cares more for him
ter boy has work at a dance by ivan
oh and the chick is with another guy
but secretly wants he boy
and they go to see the boys show for some reason
between acts boy wants to stop
he knew the chic is there
he sensed her b4 seeing her
and looking at her he figured out her reason for leaving based on her expression
ivan goes on a monologue about how boy s-cked and is only good cuz of ivans cr-p
and if he screws up hes gonna ice a boy
I think the boy can take ivan
kick out his good leg and stomp his head
wtf I just noticed this is in widescreen
so the show goes on
but ron eremy is jonesing and behind the scenes
he fights ivan over the drugs
the boy dances ballet and its pretty good
it took the whole movie about a boy doing ballet to show him dancing
like how Anubis doesn't show up in the Yugioh movie until the end
then they find ivans body on the background
and every one runs
se you in h-ll ivan
ivan and the chick I mean the boy and the chick reunite
and the music guy looks bummed
was he gay for ivan?
the end
that was pretty good
nice b/w looks
good acting
simple and easy to follow plot
good themes
its a well made film
Michael curtiz does it again
hes always great
for the mad genius 2 I want the boy and the chick to be married and have a kid. but the kid is ivan reincarnated as he put his ki into the boy and it came out his parts to get the chick pregnant and brought his soul back from h-ll into the kid. he has all his memories and grows to adult size in a few weeks. also he wants to become a dancer again but needs cash so he becomes a drug dealer as he has memorized the recipe for the drugs he gave the ron Jeremy guy from the 1st film. also right after b0ning the chick after getting married the chick has a rapid pregnancy and expands to 9 months in a buncha minutes as the ki infused spurm is linked to ivans past self. oh and after becoming a famous dancer, the boys dad comes to find him after seeing his name and poster and wants him back as the boys fam missed him.

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