Mothra Review

note; spelling better don't make it better

mothra

this is my review on mothra from 1961

ew widescreen

find da cure

it starts with a storm heading for some place in da ocean

I'm watchin the Japanese version btw

this boat in da storm has to take shelter on infant island

sounds like a pregnancy or age regression fetish location

after da storm searchers search for the boat

they say the island is radioactive

more fetish fuel

what next? chaos energy?

the rescue boat goes to the island and saves the survivors

but theres no radiation illness

just like Chernobyl

this is how twilight zone eps start

i find a lot of the time, the twilight zone twist is either "they were already dead" or "it was earth all along"

also, wheres all the babes?

I thought this was japan!

in anime everyones sexy!

these guys are moderate

one of em is a fata55

I'm not into male weight gain!

that's for gay guys!

they mention mysterious natives on infant island

its said when they tested nukes on infant  island, it was virtually uninhabited

virtually??

that doesn't mean totally

some country tested nukes on it b4

fata55 is a reporter who tries to get this guys face on camera

but he and his camera chick are scared by a mouse

candy a55!!

its the interviewed guys son shinji's mouse

shinji? that wiener from evangelion?!

the mouse goes in fat55's suit but gets out

interview guy sez the pacific islanders share similar language so they can communicate

like Slovenian and Croatian

f u spell Czech! stop turning croation into creation

I had to retype it like 5x

you'd think after the 1st 2 it would stpop autocorrecting

later a boat is taking off and theres a big a55 sendoff

reminds me of the great battleship Potemkin

but that was when the pre soviets faced the japan

these scientists or w/e whine about some guy named nelson

fata55 is caught by a creepy guy pretending to be a cabin boy

he sez; I cant let u just leave

me; hes gonna b0ne him!!

like in dat H anime!

fata55 introduces himself to da crew

hes fukuda

f u I'm calling u fata55

he looks like mo from degrassi next gen

they go on da island and find a forest

maybe its broccoli

they are in radio active suits

fata55 keeps accidentally aiming his rifle at the guy who b0ned him

hes comic relief like abbot and Costello

maybe beavis and butthead

1 guy finds big a55 fungus in a cave

and writing in stone

its probably just graffiti

toshio maeda was here

the plants or fungus or w/e then tentacle the guy who found it dead

but leave after hes done

wtf hes not dead

he had enough points for another continue

he talks about foot tall women

the joke is; 12 inch piano player!

or maybe theyre just midgets

my moms grandma was 4'6

shes like an elf!

or to be politically correct; elfrican American

except she was in Poland

the team finds action figure sized people

theres these twins(not austin powers twins or the shining twins) who speak in beeps

the guy who b0ned fata55 captures the twins

hes gonna make them b0ne him!

then human sized islanders arrive

well

maybe half-elf sized

I played D&D

they make banging sounds until the b0ning guy lets the twins go

then they return to japan

guess nothing happened between then and this

maybe find a sa daemon in the waves

later they talk about nelson and his past is unknown

he tried to find something in the amazon b4

was it a dinosaur? cuz Arthur conan doyle did dat in da lost world

is nelson the guy who tried to catch the twins and b0ned fata55?

fata55 and a guy talk about the writing on the stone he found

it sez something about mothra

how convenient it relates to the American word for night butterfly

later the b0nong guy returns to the island and goes after the twins

this time they open fire on the islanders

but the islanders just keep coming

are they the twins slaves??

one of em awakens mothra and a rock thing busts open revealing an egg

how Zelda

later the b0ning guy Is getting famous off the twins

he has a stage show about em

in the show they sing about mothra

no subs for the song

I hate when they do dat

yatsu subber wa okama kusai baka!!

ore samma wa muteki da!

at the island the islanders do some blood ritual and the egg moves

fata55 and his homies try to reason with nelson(the b0ning guy) but he sez the twins aint human so they am his property

also they don't speak Japanese

then what are they doing in japan!?

oh yeah

oh the guy hanging with fata55 was the guy b0ned by the plant

and the twins saved him

they start talking Japanese

they can transmit thoughts and feeling to people

telepathy?

what is this? go nagai!?

they warn em about mothra commig if they aint freed

why not tell em wat mothura is??

how can they know of it??

the islanders have a ritual and a big black phallllic thing comes outta the egg

later the paper outed the nelson but he wants a retraction

retract my foot from yo a55!

also something was seen in the pacific

this isn't 1999 so its not the SDF-1 at macross island

in the ocean the big black phallllic monster busts a big white boat

they blame nelson but he sez its not his fault and mothras a myth

nelson is from Rolisica the country dat nuked da island

the plant b0ned guy goes to save the twins as fata55 kicks a55 of guys after them

they try to stop the twins telepathy with a special radio wave blocking substance to stop mothra

a jet guy goes by mothta

the military tries to prepare

the Rolisican government sides with nelson

the military tries to stop mothra but it don't work

also I don't think moth larva can swim

nelson thinks they iced mothra

nelson gets a call telling him to stop da show

he wont

he yells at the twins to stfu and takes em away in the substance box

mothra busts a reservoir and it floods

some dumba55 left her baby on a bridge and fata55 has to save it

the people want him to return the twins

this fat kid gets in nelsons place and saves the twins

 but they catch him

Rolisica sides with japan to free the girls

oh the fat kid is shinji

reminds me of all the male weight gain art of that wiener from evangelion

fata55 and the b0ned guy save shinji who was bound and gagged and maybe b0ned

mothra is In japan and busting a55

so the army tries again

didn't this happen in starship troopers?

just bust a hole in its back and drop a grenade

man these tanks aint doing jack

we need Mazinger Z!

1 breast fire and hes toast

mothra climbs Tokyo tower and snaps it in 2

mothtra then makes a cocoon

hes digivolving!

correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't silk super flammable?

just torch it as it transforms

as its changing its gonna be weaker

its armor wont be at full power

plus it might be half morphed and incomplete

the next day the military uses some kinda heat ray to attack it

why not use a giant magnifying glass and burn a hole in it?

it catches fire and burns

they think they won

nelson mocks the twins

btw the twins don't look too much similar

the twins sing and the cocoon busts open and a big effing moth busts out

its wingbeat causes gale winds

holy cr-p cars and being blown around

mothra (not mum ra from thunder cats)is a puppet but looks real

now it would be one with cgi and s-ck

nelson books it with his droogs

the Rolisica asks fata55 and the b0ned guy to stop mothra

I should mention the b0ne guy is chujo and the b0nING guy is nelson

nelson is stopped by the people so he pulls a gun

the cops shred him with gunfire

they otta jam a gun up his a55 ad give him a 45 caliber suppository!

I think that was in Rolisica

btw most of the people there are white

and they speak English

but nelson is like Eurasian

mothra attacks the Rolisica city of new kirk city(totally not new York in amerce)

theb0ned guy gets the twins

the Christian Rolisican pray and the b0ned guy sees a cross against the sun at a church

the gang sez the bells are like the twins voices

the b0ned guy wants all the church bells (in the country??) to ring at exactly 3 pm

better synchro ur watches

why not rebuke mothra?

it worked on the loch ness monster

they're both daemons right?

after waiting until 3, all bells ring

what Is this? the hunchback of notre dame?

oh and they painted a symbol on the ground

mothra lands and the twins say bye and leave with him

they wish peace and happiness

the camera chick forgot to take a picture

they return to the island and in this rock is a cross that looks like TK's crest from Digimon

funny about them wishing them peace and love

what about all the innocent people killed by mothras rampage?

1 guy was bad and they slaughter thousands?!

that's f'd!

it could be a message on racism

but come on man!

its like when someone doesn't show some homie respect so he stabs em dead

the end

I liked this

classic effects and no cg

back when movies had heart

too bad it was widescreen

they should've just filmed the whole image instead of cutting off the top and bottom

for mothra 2 i'd like it to be the 90s and a Rolisica movement has grown bitter from all their families slaughtered in mothra's rampage. they gather enough votes and get ito government to get a motion passed to renuke infant island. this time, to totally wipe it out. mothra senses the peoples vengeance and returns to attack them for thinking against it, but this time they have a giant transforming centipede robot that turns into a humanoid and has acid fire blasters and injectors to inject and blast mothra with acid fire to destroy it from inside and out.