Thursday, February 4, 2016

A Farewell To Arms Review

note; my keyboard is all tinky winky so theres some trypoes
a farewell to arms
this is my reviw on the 1930s farewell 2 armz'
gary copers in this
it starts with some text I wasn't really paying attention to
then some guy in some war
a car drives and they are getting a guy to get healed
a officer(ew! hes English!) is bashing a nurse for not doing something
the other nurses have anti male views on this other soldier
they also gossip about the fired nurse
I assume she was b0ing some guy
maybe a dead guy
then an italiano dr comes out of surgery and hugs and kisses who I think is gary cooper
he talks about his operation he just did
they talk about chicks and gary gives him 50 French dollars
at a bar he talks to a giggling frenchie girl about being americano
he talks to  her feet so I assume he has a foot fetish
then a battle happens at the area and they run around in the dark
they find a safe place and talks about archeticture and her feet
im not really paying attention as im talking to a guy about dragon ball
later some italiano guy talks to a gril and tries to seduce her with wine
as he leaves for the wine, gary comes over and talks to her
the italiano gives them the wine and leaves them
the girls bf bought it in th war
I wasn't paying attaneion as this guy was talking to me on AIM and I lolled so hard I almoist lost control of my pipes
later gary cooper is out in the garden b0ning the nurse
but theres bugs out there and foot long centipedes that crawl up yo butt
hes going to the front and might asplode like her old bf
the next day the italiano guy bugs the gary cooper for details on his b0ning the girl
I think hes a purvo
then the nurse's girl buddy talks with him about love
this is turning into Robotech
love and war
and people talking about their issues
gary copers a amblance driver
then he turns back on the way there
but the tire tracks don't match up his trail
he goes back to the hospitlal to see his girl
he tells her some stuff and that last nights b0ning was important to him
she gives him a Saint Anthony medal
the italiano outs gary cooper and the nurse to the brass
after that I whizzed but don't think I missed much
theres a battle but they surgry the people
I think this is A MASH thing
the italiano guy operates on some crippled guy by blast
I tink it was gary cooper who was crippled
and he crippled him
the next part of the film is from the pov of the ciplled guy
they take him temp under the arm
not in the butt
later some guy I don't recogzine is b0ning a nurse and she slips out
I think its gary cooper
the nurse says they might have kids
in front of a priest
I thin shes preggo
he complains about them not being married and prays for them
I thin hes doing a quick marriage
later that night they b0ne and hes gonna get an operaton in  the AM
this isn't as good as Robotech
several months happen
then we get a creepy puppet show
its like puppet master 1
and the guys ae watching it
lter the nurse talks about the gary cooper being a virgin b4 his b0ning her
as they walk up to a building theres a horse in the background
that horse is long ded now
in the hospital the head nurse whines at gary cooper for his drinkin
shes gona send him to the front
later the nurse and the gary coopr are b0ning and she says she hates the rain for her phobia
I like the rain
its refreshing and nice
they make out and b0ne under a cape and say bye
I like capes
very 1800s
like m bison
or washizaki from riki-oh
or that guy from doomed megalopolis they were based on
after he leaves she goes to Switzerland to have a baby
later the italoiano is trying to get gary to be with some girls
but hes loyal and turns his drunk advances
I think the italiano guy wants t seduc him
he tampers with the mail and sends his letters sent to his woman back to him
he goes AWOL and off to find his woman thinking somethings of with her
I like how the priest is thr good guy in here
nowadays he'd be the bad guy
we get a montage of a lot of crosses and him going through war
I bet the book was better
telling of his violent adventures
and cannibalism
a plane comes down amd opens fire
ust like in wings(1927)
everyones blowing up
this movie is pretty good after all
better than that 50s or 60s or w/e version
in  train station the italianos say they shoot people who they find who dontwanna return
he goes in the hospital and find out his woman is having a baby
he puts an add in the paper about meeting her in a hotel
but his italiano friend fnds him and wants to bring him back
but he says no
some guy tells him something about gary being arrested for leaving
gary reveals to his italiano friend his gf had his kid
his italiano tells him his gf is in switzermanland
later she gets all his letters and faints
it says
I assume it means; censored
as that what it says on Mexican dbz vids of scenes cut from the engish version
his italiano friend sez; if I knew how u felt about her, and gary cooper goes off
then the nurse has ababy in a difficult procedure
they never show her with the baby gut
I guess it was too hot for the 30s
gary arrives after the baby
I don't think its been pooped out yet'
se did but it died
thats sad
didn't it survive in the 50s version?
this is cuz of the italiano guy

aw butts!
Austria lost to italy
every time!
I want Austria to win for once!
I don't care if its inaccurate!
I want the good guys to win for once
like having america win korea and viet nam
gary cooper prays to the Lord to save his woman
he sees her again and they talk about having a bright future
if this was a horror movie that's like umping into a pit of acid fire
shes dead too
is he gonna eat her like in violence jack with the hermaphrodite and her giant bf?
the end
for a farewell to arms 2 I'd like him to be workin with german occultists for a way to bring her back and it creates a zombie apocalypse where all the ww12 dead revive as zombies and they begin devouring the flesh of all those around Europe.

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