Thursday, February 4, 2016

The Picture Of Dorian Gray Review

note; my keyboard is wack so theres typoes
the picture of diorin dgray
this is my revirw on the picture of dorian gray (the 1945 version)(aka, the good version)
I read the book as a kid and saw this film several times b4
I liked it but that picture always freaks me out
its like lon chaney in phantom of the opera
this is rated tv g
but that horrifying image!
and him b0ning midgets!
and dark themes!
in the opening credits
john bonar
tee hee
so its the 1800s and theres this dude played by geoege sanders who likes manipulating his homies
his chum basil made a painting that hes secretive about
George makes comments on the young male in he painting beimg handsome
n0 h0m0
they talk about basil not wanting to show George dorian grays picture or him
much of the dialogue could be interpreted as being code for gayness
basil feels extraordinary things about dorian
I felt like that for tommy wiseau
hes a cool guy with an unusual charisma
theres something special about that man
I felt good vibes when I met him
then orian is playing piano and they talk ND dorian poses for the painting
if this were Germany it would be a nude painting
George says the only way to stop feeling temptation is t give in to it
I think hes trying to seduce him
then he talks about dorians looks
they only care about material things and not the next life
just like rappers
George sanders kills and pns a butterfly
a good metaphor on age and beauty
you either die young or live long enough to get old
unless u got good dna or work out
my grampa was in his 90s and looked like he was in his 70s
plus my mom sez when I was born I looked like her dad
all wrinkley and polish
then this young girl is into dorian
schoolgirl crush
like saved by the bell
thy finish the picture and dorian wants the picture to grow old instead of him and him being young forever
theres also a magic cat item nearby
theres a lot of talk of pagan GODS
its like yugioh
summoning wicked gods and daemon lords
doruan says he'd give his soul if he could sta young and the picture would age
later he goes out clubbing (or whatever its callin in the 1800s) ad watches a puppet show
after that he sees the chick from murder she wrote singing
this was made back when Mussolini was around so she was younger
interesting how shes like 90 and back then was young in a film of youth
dorian turns straight for her and she sngs of love(like minmei in Robotech)
shes also heetero for him
they start having a bit of love but in a clean g rated way with no b0ning
I miss how movies were clean and wholesome back then
now its all skimpy bimbos b0ning rappers
they play piano and are happy
its revealed she don't even know his real name
she calls him "sir tristian"
I assume is like "captain nemo" in the crow city of angels
her older brother is worried of her and thinks hes bad news
then he goes off to fight in the war or w/e
I think the English are going after some slum country to take it over and force them to be subservient to their deviant regent
later dorian is at dinner with George anders and talk about mistakes in youh
George sanders speaks unpositive of relations with women
then he acts like hes the intelligent one
its a bit suspect
I think hes queer
doran reveals he wants to marry that chick
George says he neither approves nor disapproves of anything
but those who stand for nothing fall for anything
georse then twists dorian with his elitist uppercrust "enlightened" views
they see the girl in the bar and dorian is happy
basil approves of them marrying
George makes deviant remarks
basil on 1 side George on the other
like an angel ND dl
gorge suggests testing her and messing wth her feelings to see if she is as pure as doran says
this is like a guy saying
if ur b0ner is 7 inches then show me!
its not gonna end well
later dorian and the murer she wrote chick are at  dorians home and they mention the cat item is one of the 73 false gods of Egypt
dorian reads an Oscar wilde poem (LOL) and does the thing George suggests by suggesting she stay the night
she is hurt by his immorality and leaves
hes mean to her and she goes to commit seppuku
that gurl loved u and you put her love to the test for no reason
what a ==== ====er
she comes back and he ignores her
after a night of b0ning he writes an agry email at her for doing what al those teens on maury did
he blames her for everything and dumps her
then says hes gonna become a deviant and live only for pleasure
what a ==== ====er
that chick isn't a g I joe to stick up your a55
shes a human life
if she dies cuz of his then shes gona drag him down to h=ll with her
then they get b0ned by every king or queen of engand over the last 500 years all at once
ell, maybe not her
dorian later feels bad and notices his picture has malformed more evil looking
he plans to fix his error and marry her
but she blew her brains out last night
he drove her to it
even goerge seems a bit busted up over it
not much though
he said she swallowed something
I assume she ate her gun
the brits don't have guns
except the criminals
George twists dorians guilt into self centered views and makes a human ding seem like no big deal
what a ==== ====er
dorian puts on airs of not caring
hes hiding his feelings by acting like hes different
like in teen shows
basil wants to show the painting but doran says no
he makes a big deal over it and wont explaun
he hides it in his childhood room with his childhood things
it shows symbolism for us leaving our morals and very soul in our childhood while it decrodes as the soul is not just for kids
over the years he becomes a deviant who goes out fighting and b0ning and doing unwholesome acts
ften disappeared for weeks at a time and b0ning midgets in hotel rooms(im not making that up. he goes upstairs wth a midget and the door closes)
but would keep returning to see his picture cuz hes OCD
he lives only for pleasure aND desire
yet that schoolgirl who crshed on him is over 13 now and of legal age to b0ne in 1800s englnd
and he sees her as innocent and pure
I assume in the true story she was out b0ning men and acted like a rapper girl
that's how it would be in the modern version
she wants to my him even tough hes likw 24 years older than her
holy hugh Heffner batman
they watch some weird Asian thing which is a metaphor for... I don't know, caNDY
dorian turns her down and she has issues
tis reminds me of hey arnlod where Eugene went bad after his hero the abdicator was revealed to be an actor
later hes 38 and unaged and meets basil
hes going to paris france amd stops by dorians place
basil confronts dorian abou everyone haTING him and he implies hes b0ned them
basil makes reference to "seeing dorians soul"
but only God can do that
now they mention God?
but the whole movie was about pagan things aND vice
they go into the room and dorian shows basil his warped picture
holy f man!
that's horrendious!
I saw urotsukidoi, genocyber apocalypse zero, violence jack and berserk
but that
scared the h=ll outta me!
its in full color and has loud dramatic music
its a sensory assault!
his soul has aids!
dorian reveals his wish and how it came true
basil suggests prayer
the 1 sin you cant be forgiven of is the sin you never confess
while basil is praying for dorian he kills basil and wipes the blood off on his boyhood things
a clever metaphor for him befouling his innocence with his sin
it Showed that horrid painting AGAIN!
and its hand was soaked in BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD
jiminey Christmas!
dorian then blackmails a guy to dispose of the body
I assume he eats it
at the rate dorian is going im surprised he didn't b0ne basils dead a55
seems that dorian was b0ning him and hes gonna out him
later dorian asks the girl to marry him
but shes a virgin and hes probably got some secks diseases
later people cant find basil

and the guy he blackmailed blew his brains oiut

later he sees a street preacher who talks about the soul

then the big brother of the 1st gf finds him playing piano
but its some guy who looks like wolf blitzer
he recognized the music as dorians tune
then dorian comes in and someone calls him "sir tristin"
some addict draws  him with a noose and the brother goes after him afer hearing his street name
he confronts him and dorian says hes not the guy cuz he looks too young
he lets him go and the addict reveals doran gray looked 20 for 20 years
its like the wasp woman
later when talking about basil, George mentions that"everyone who disappears wintds up in sanfran sisco"
his movie has a lot of gayness in it
later dorian has nightmares of his crimes
later theyre hunting and the brother runs out and gets blown apart by gunfire
the English complain about it ruining their shooting for the day
later dorian gos to londen England and the girl's boyfriend  sees the painting and reveals it to the girl and George sanders
George recognizes the picture as does the girl
her bf tries to get him to not marry drian
then they get a ltter that dorian has wanted to change and is going away
dortian wants to start over and make up for his countless sins
he wants to leave and sees the picture is slightly less horrid from his setting foot on the right path
he stabs the painting to free himself from its curse and he dies
the chick and the gang come in and find the innocent picture returned to its former goodness and a rotted dorian gray on the floor
also he has herpies sores on his face
the corpse don't look half as disturbing as the pictuere
for the picture of dorian gray 2 I'd like for some kids to be messing with a oujia board and it cals his soul back from h-ll and he possesses a golem the kids made. then he gets used to life in the 20th century and goes around b0ning guys. its a comedy.

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