Thursday, February 4, 2016

Casablanca Review

note; my keyboard isn't that great so expecy typloes
Casablanca
this is my review on Casablanca
ooh
Conrad viedit!
he was in the cabinet of dr caligari
and max steiner doing music
thid should be good
so we get a narration on people escaping ww2 in Europe going to Casablanca IN French Africa TO get to america
so the authorities get word some pople were killed in the desert and they round up suspects
one tries to escape but is capped by cops
later some soldiers come over and the guy running Casablanca greets them
then its night and this big black guy is playing piano in a club
this seems to be a place where malcontents and spys gather
tuns out bogart runs the club
an angry frenchie tries to bully his way into the club but bogart stands up to him
also peter lorry is bogarts home boy
he helps escaping Europeans for a price
he has letters that allow passage to anywhere and hes selling em
is this like with the poors taking over france in the scarlet pimpernel and killing the rich?
ohh
lorry killed the men in th desert
maybe it was his hand on the loose like that other movie he did
this fat guy ants to buy bogarts bar
or his black guy
I guess hes a slave
bogart refuses
later bogart sends this woman he appears to be b0ning home cuz shes drunk
and talks to this guy I don't recall but was shown b4
theres too many white people in this movie
I cant tell em apart
so someones gonna be arrested in bogarts bar
and the guy tells bogart to stip this guy called Lazlo from escaping Casablanca with his woman
is this like escape from new York?
that movie was cool
turns our bogart foght in several battles that he profited from
oh
lzlo Is lorry
he asks bogart for help but he tells him he'd be stoopid 2 escape
hes caught and dragged off to be used in occult rituals
bogart sez he risks his life for no one
h talks with some military guys about the war and hes totally nautral
ohhh
lorry printed lies and propaganda in papers
I knew he was the bad guy
later a couple comes in to see lorry
they domt know hes being sacrificed
later this spy uses the guise of selling a ring as code for meeting and talking about something
I assume they are rebels
this guy I don't know but showed up b4 makes friendly with the couple and says If he were a woman he'd b0ne bogart
I think hes queer
oh and I think Lazlo is really the husband in the couple
then who was lorry?
this is confsimg
yugioh is asier to figure out
now I play pack with the dark master! by ritual sacrificing 2 level 4 monsters I ritual summon dark master zorc! in attack mode!!
that I get
not this film
Lazlo talks with the ring guy and learns the guy was arrasted
the wife talks to the big black pianist and gets him to play this song she likes
the bogart guy is called rick and he has a romantic past with this girl
sorta like robotech
bogart is angry at his big black pianist paying that song and sees the woman and is surprized
they talk about the last time she saw him
the they go home for the night
bogart stays up at night drinking
the black guy suggests going away to drink but wont leave bogart
bogart seems butthurt over her coming into his world again
he has his big black pianist play that song for him and he flashbacks to france to being with her
wtf
theres a disco ball in a flashback
time warp!!
then war broke out and they had to leaVE
he suggests getting married to her
bu she doesn't wan to
later bogarts waitng for her at the train station but she don't shoiw
she left a dump note and he leaves and becomes malcontent
after the flashback she comes into his bar to talk
hes all bummed out
she explains why she left him
she found someone better
he tells her off
GOOD
she ditched him for another guy and comes back cuz she wants something
I hope the military gets her and ritual sacrfices her
they met with the military and are told they cant lave but they can leave if they give up the malcontent rebels
he refuses
hes all cocky and thinks hes better than the military
they try to get passports from the black market
I bet those passports were stolen from honest hard working people
also I think peter lorry was wacked
later the woman talks to bogart and is all stuck up over him being unhappy at her leaving him
its like getting mad at someone for beating you up after you stole from them
ohhhhhhhh
she was married to the guy even when dating bigart
shes two timing!
this is getting springer!!
this makes her even worse!
toying with a mans heart for her own amusement
this is like bad sailor moon!
the military searches the bar for the letters peter lorry stole but find none
so this gir wo's running from Bulgaria has her husband trying to win enough to get to america
she defends the woman by saying she never told her husband about her b0ning bogart
he lets the woman who hurt him have her fave table and play her fave song
bogart helps the Bulgarian guy win at roulwtte
where is Bulgaria?
is it near Bolivia?
that's a 3rd world slum country right?
I hear about it on docs about drug wars
he ta;ks with Lazlo over the passports but he tells him to ask his wife over why he said no
during a patriotic sounding song the French song is played
I assume this is a WAy of getting it past the censors as its the French and the humans trying to b0ne eachother
the military guy says to close the bar as the frenchies might have an uprising or w/e
he says something to the wife but I wasn't following
the husband is planning on meeting some rebels in a meetng but its probably a trap
turns out he was in a camp while his wife was b0ning bogart
doesn't explain her b0ning him while married
turns out bogart can las 2 weeks of paying everyone for not working with his place clothed
the wife comes in and tries to get him to give her the letters
she keeps playing with his heart but he's not having any of her filth
she insults him for having a broken heart
she uses her husband getting wacked as an excuse for him submitting to her
then she pulls a gun on him
he walks up to her AND calls her bluff
he otta beat the gun outta her hamds
wtf
they hug?!
se claims to still love him
then they b0ne
she tells her side that says she heard he was capped in camp
then while b0ning bogart she found out hes alive and ditched bogart
I don't trust her
she plays all weepy and that SHE CANT LEAve him again
bogart meets with Lazlo and they talk about loving the same woman
some stuff happens but I wasn't paying attention as I was typing the sequel
bogart plans to escape with the wife using the letters
he also plans to let Lazlo get caught trying to escape so they have a legal right to hold him
bogart sells his bar and big back pianist to the fat guy
then the guy I don't remember but keps showing up comes to arrest lazlo
but bogart pulls a gun on him and has him set it up to let the husband and wife get away
he givesa speech and says she would be good in Casablanca
bogart claims she didn't b0ne him to her husband
they get on the plane and leave
also this military guy comes and finds out Lazlo is on the plane
bogart shoots him
the guy I keep forgetting tells the troops to round up the usual suspects to get the finger off nogart
he decides to go off with bogart and I think they turn gay for eachother
the end
for Casablanca 2 I'd like it  to be in the 50s and the world is a nucular wasteland from the soviets and good guys nuking the world. bogart has found out she was lying the whole time and was just toying with his heart. he decides to hunt her down and skin her and feed it to her as a final punishment for her betraying him. he must fight his way through several levels of biker gags and mutants to find her as shes become the leader of the mutant bikers and wants to break every mans heart one at a time, and only bogart can stop her. having mastered several weapons, he must beat em up. its also a 2 player sega and snes game where player 2 is he military guy who was shot by bogart but has become his new friend and is rebuilt with cyborg parts and a monowire for slicing through people when powered up enough.

No comments:

Post a Comment