Thursday, February 4, 2016

Seven Brides For Seven Brothers Review

note; my keyboard is kinda screwed up and the keys are badly placed
so don't mind the tyopes
7 brides 4 7 brothers
this is my review for 7 brides for 7 brothers
with that name I'd assume its a P0ERNOE
its widescreem so it might as well be
it stars with a guy looking for a wife
he has 7 bros(6 + him)
back in the slavery days or whenever this was made it was common to have like a dozen kids
apparently every woman in town is married
in prison movies this is why people go prison gay
back then people had more control
he keeps asking random women to marry him
what is this? vegas??
so he weds this chick ad they go back to his texas chainsaw massacre home
she sings and talks aboit how wonderful it is to cook and care for one man
she finds is of 7 bros and they are ARE alphabetically named after bible figures
this is starting to sound like snow white
except less midgets
the woman knocks the food on th floor since they eat messy
this is why u get to know a woman b4 marrying her
she may be psycho
they get ready for bed but don't sleep together cuz she doesn't wanna b0ne him
so e goes to sleep in a tree
she sings and invites him back in
im pretty sure they b0ned then
she takes their clothes and washes em but wont let em get em until they clean up
to quote cobra commander
she civilizes em instantly
the woman and the bros go to town and te dudes beat people up
around 40 mins in my yugioh buddy senr me a youtube vid and I watched it
when I got back to seeing the movie they were at an outside dance
it goes on for a while
and gets pretty kung fu
this is like confederate break dancing
then theres a barn raising contest
the bad guys take potshots at the 7 bros
but the bros are too candy a55 to fight back
then they start fighting bsck
after some streets of rage 3, the barn falls apart
in wintr this guy who I don't recognize (oh wait, its ben) wants to leave
the main guy sings a song
while he was singing I read a review on the Robotech game for phones
when I golt back the bros were capturing women
one townsman tries to behead one bro with a shovel
this is turning into a horror movie
theres a chase and they go through this avalanche zone
they make noise and cause an avalance to seal the trail
if this were made today it would make the men look like savages
adms woman tells him off so adam goes off to a cabin out in thr mountains
the captured women keep being jerks to the guys
I hate how women cAN HIT men but men cant fight back
its racist
in real life if some womN pulled that, she'd get slugged out
and now the women are fighting eachother
so adAMS woman sez shes preggo
the womans sing about wanting to be mARRIED in june
like in that Robotech song about being in love; the line; each year has 13 junes
these chix are pear shaped
they have huge hips
and buns
its like a rap video
hey sing for the rest of the winer
then its spring
then they sing with the men
is like the wizare of oze
then adama woman is pooping out her baby
Gideon gets adam and tell him of the kid
but adam don't believe him
so he slugs him and tells im off
adam returns and they prepare for battle
as the sealed trail in unsealed by spring
and the townsmen want their women back'
they decide to give back the girls
but the girls don wanna go
the townsmen invade in time to see the bros trying to bring the girls and it looks like theyre b0ning em
they all get married together and it ends
I hope in 7 bride 4 7 bros 2 the have the children of the 7 bros falling in love with eachother and inbreeding and  it ends with tem revealing they were the ancestors of the inbred cannibals from wrong turn 1

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