Thursday, February 4, 2016

The Last Picture Show Review

note; my keyboard isn't normal and theres typoes
the last picture show
this is my review on the last picture show
its full screen but theres black bars all around the image
that just looks cr=ppy
it starts with a guy in a barren town in a truck listening to redneck music
he finds a guy sweeping the road for whatever reason and picks him up
thy go to a store and the owner bashes them for being slobby dumba55 teens
apparently they lost a football game yesternight
then a guy comesin and the owner gives him cash for losing a bet(on the football game)
AFTER  some rednex drop a 3rd teen off and bash their football skills, they play catch with some item
nothings eally happeniin this film
hope someone attacks and they need to stop him by playing a card game
worked for yugioh gx
later he goes to see a movie
I think this is the 40s or something
better than the 60s with all thos drugged up hippies
in the thatre a couple makes out
hope they don't start b0ning
the girlfriend complains about not getting an anniversary present
women are so mental
no wonder so many guys turn queer
I think I used that joke b4
later a guy brings his car to some place and his girl takes off her top
good thing shes wearing a bra
don't wanna see her long shoelace nipples
the guy wats to b0ne her but she dont wana get pregnant
good move girl
modern stuff would have him b0ning her pregnant
like degrassi or glee or w/e
then they break up or something
later this guy talks to a waitress at a diner
hen its school where they teach kids to play card games or w/e
in class they teach values and biblical goodness
then its gym class and the fata55 teacher wants 1 kid to do something for him in exchange for getting him out of civics
if thiswere a modern movie he'd be b0ning that boy as payment
I prefer these 1800s films
more class and worth and heart
theres a lot of redneck music in this movie
later a girl talks to her mom about the boyfriend
the mom suggests b0ning her bf and she says its a sin
if this wer modern films the teen would be preggo and stressing over being full of babys
later the teen the gym guy didn't b0ne drives this chick to some place andshe invites him in for a soda
If this were a modern film she'd be seducing him
she starts crying and the guy leaves
later its christmas
and the girl whos mom wanted her to b0ne is invited to a party
then theres a dance with the adults
the girl gets a xmas present from her bf but he gets mental when she has to goes to the party
he challenges the guy who asked her to a fight
he leaves and takes his girl to the party(its not the adult party)
so he makes out with an older woman
at the party they want the girl to undress on a diving board
such purr vurr zinn
I notice the nude men in the pool have their parts blurred out
then some guys talk about getting some chix
they mention getting a HEFFER
I assume hey mean literally and want him to b0ne a cow
then they decide to get a girl male prostiuite
but he pressed the wrong button combo cuz she kicks him out of the car
and the h00ker is a fatty
if this were made in modrn times he'd fail and b0ning due to him being queer
then an aDULT asks whats up and they reveal the got him to b0ne a fat chick
the adult tells em to stay away from his businesses (which the courts would make illegal in this dark century)
then the guy with te older woman starts b0ning her
and we cut to right after the b0ning
the next day 1 guy goes to the dier and the waitress makes him a cheeseburger
they talk about the kid being b0ned by the big woman
then the ADULT comes in and forgivs him
then the older woman is with the guy and brushing his hair
I think shes thegym teachers woman
then the adult, the kid and the guy who got the fat chivk to b0ne the kid are fishing and the adult talx about the past of the county
his wife went nuts and his kids are dead
he was b0ning a woman but couldn't marry her cuz shes already married
later some boys wanna go to mexico
theny return
then trevealed that a guy named sam died
its the adult
he gave the pool hall to a teen
after he funeral they are driving and the teen looks at the water they went fishing with the adult
then the gurl and the guy go to the motel and b0ne
but he cat do it
then she makes a fit about people knowing shes a virgin
when did being a virgin become bad?
its like saying being sober is bad
ur so sober!
then her friends come I after hes left and ask how it was to be b0ned
she says she cant describe it
then they graduate from school
yugioh gx's graduation was better
then the guy amd the older woman celebrate by her giving him an item I cant identify
oh and the girl b0ned a guy named boddy sheen
I assume its Charlie sheens gampa
the guy goes mental and throws pol blls at the wall
then skips town to go hunt dinosaursin Africa or w/e
later its revealed bbby sheen married some other chick
then some guy talks the girl to the pool hall and b0nes her
he takes her home but is cold to her
I gurss she as bad in bed
she then whines to her mom
se ells her about the guy b0ning the older woman
this pool hall remnds me of the music man
then its evealed this grl was picked up in a car by a guy and eeryones worried hes gonna mo lest her
they find em and no one is upset but the mom
she goes mental and wants this boy executed w/o a fair triaL
the dr said nothing was done
then the pool guy goes on a ride with the gorl and she tries to seduce him
don't do it!
you'll get aids!
which was called cooties in the 50s
and bieber fever now
he wants to b0ne but se suddenly don't and says she has all summer
then why seduce him if u don't wannab0ne?
women are weird and confusing
its revealed the pool guy is living in his car
he argues with the guy b0ning his girl ovr wos girl she is
after argueing an talking BOUT who b0ned who, they fight
and the new bf got his head busted wth a beer bottle
after some  recovery, hes lost an eye and talks to the waitress about the girl
then the girl comes in and they kiss and its revealed hes the town hero and she wants  to marry him
then theyre drving and want to wed
tthen a cop car comes after em
they pull over and the cop wants them to follow him
the pool hall guy lost a eye
the parents yell at em and leave the boy
im having trouble keeping the charACTERS sraight
tthey all look the same
they say nothings been the same since the adult died
and this woman says he had nice hands
ive hard of foot fetish
HAND fetish?!
sounds like bad yugioh
she was very gay for him
then theres a band playing he song from we sing dinosaurs"the big parade of dinosaURS" at a football game
thy sing the schoolas national anthem and it fades to this guy going to see this other guy
and the other guy is going to the service
he invites him to the picture show of the no rocky horror kind
they watc a (joel McCray?) cowboy movie
tuns out the picture show is closing
after beer and chronic, his friend goes off to war
then hes in the pool hall and the wind is gusting
then he finds a dead kid who was roadkilled
and the people don't care
the pool guy carrys the body from the crmesceme and lays him on the sidewalk and covers him with is coat
he looks over his kingdom(the pool hall) and gets into his car and drives off at james dean speed
he turns around and heads back
such a meaningful scene
he later goes to the older ladys place and asks for coffee
and shes still In her robe
this is how p0rn0s start
she throws te pot and tirades for like 80 whole seconds
women are so mental
he holds her hands and she feels his hand on her face and goes emotional
then it ends abnd shows wo played who
the kid wjo b0ned the fatty was run over
for the last picture show 2 I'd like the descendants of the survivors of this movi being kis or teens in the 80s and dealing with the video game crash of 83 and the rise of Nintendo. it would be mostly them playing video games and whole segments would be complete speedruns of 80s video games. it would be in b/w and 4;3 and have an 80s hair metal/rock sound track like transformers the movie.

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